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Fractured Fairy Tale
Pan Peter

     Once upon a time (actually 10 years ago) there lived a pan named Peter. He cooked the best eggs in town. He lived with a fat, short chef name Pierre in a run down old house. One day a beautiful blonde headed girl came along screaming a name. Pierre and Pan Peter went and asked the girl why she was yelling the name “Peter Pan”. She answered, “My friend must take me to the second star to the left, wait… sorry… star to the right…yes that’s it. His name is Peter Pan, and I can’t find him.”
     “I only know a pan peter” said the chef. “Maybe that is who I am looking for.” she said confusingly. “Can you take me to him?” said the girl. “Sure.” So Pierre took the little blonde girl to Pan Peter, but when she saw that it was just a pan she got very upset. “He is a pan” said the girl, “just an ordinary frying pan. This isn’t who I’m looking for.” “This isn’t just an ordinary frying pan,” said Pierre, “he can talk! Show her Pan Peter.”Pan Peter told the girl that he knew a Wise Man to the north that would be able to answer her question. So the girl went to the Wise Man’s house. She asked about Peter Pan, and the wise man said “I know of a Peter Pan.” He takes out some jar and says “Peter Pan peanut butter.”
     Then she went back to the chef and said the wise man just told me about some kind of peanut butter. “Oh I thought that was what you were talking about.” “No” said the girl.” So the girl went on her way still screaming at the top of her lungs. Then in Pan Peter’s town came flying in, a boy dressed in green and a knife on his belt. Screaming the name “Wendy.” But that is a whole different story.