Dear Mommy,
I am in heaven now, sitting on Jesus' lap. He loves me and cries with
me, for my heart has been broken. I so wanted to be your little girl. I
don't quite understand what has happened. I was so excited when I began
realizing my existence. I was in a dark, yet comfortable place. I saw I
had fingers and toes. I was pretty far along in my developing, yet not
near ready toleave my surroundings. I spent most of my time thinking or
sleeping. Even from my earliest days, I felt a special bonding between
you and me. Sometimes, I heard you crying and I cried with you.
Sometimes, you would yell or scream, then cry. I heard Daddy yelling
back. I was sad, and hoped you would be better soon. I wondered why you
cried so much. One day you cried almost all of the day. I hurt for you.
I couldn't imagine why you were so unhappy. That same day, the most
horrible thing happened. A very mean monster came into that warm,
comfortable place I was in. I was so scared, I began screaming, but you
never once tried to help me. Maybe you never heard me. The monster got
closer and closer as I was screaming and screaming,"Mommy, Mommy, help
me, please; Mommy help me." Complete terror is all I felt. I screamed
and screamed until I thought I couldn't anymore. Then the monster
started ripping my arm off. It hurt so bad; the pain I can never
explain. It didn't stop. Oh how I begged it to stop. I screamed in
horror as it ripped my leg off. Though I was in such complete pain, I
realized I was dying. I knew I would never see your face or hear you say
how much you love me. I wanted to make all your tears go away. I had so
many plans to make you happy. Now I couldn't; all my dreams were
shattered. Though I was in utter pain and horror, I felt the pain of my
heart breaking, above all.
I wanted more than anything to be your daughter. No use now, for I was
dying a painful death. I could only imagine the terrible things that
they had done to you. I wanted to tell you that I love you before I was
gone, but I didn't know the words you could understand. And soon, I no
longer had the breath to say them; I was dead. I felt myself rising. I
was being carried by a huge angel into a big beautiful place. I was
still crying, but the physical pain was gone.
The angel took me to Jesus and set me on His lap.
He said He
loved
me, and that He was my Father. Then I was happy.
I asked Him what the thing was that killed me. He answered,"Abortion. I
am sorry my child; for I know how it feels." I don't know what abortion
is; I guess that's the name of the monster.
I'm writing to say that I love you and to tell you how much I wanted
to be your little girl.
I wanted to live. I had the will, but I couldn't; the monster was too
powerful. It s*cked my arm and legs off and finally got all of me.
It was impossible to live.
I just wanted you to know I tried to stay with you. I didn't want to
die.
Also, Mommy, please watch out for that abortion monster.
Mommy, I love you and I would hate for you to go throught the kind of
pain I did. Please be careful.
Love,
Your Baby Girl