Shane O Mac’s Fairy Tale Story
Disclaimer: I don’t own anyone, but the
girl. Don’t sue me cos I ain’t got much to give. All WWF characters belong to
VK Mac.
Shane- Now then are we sitting
comfortably? Good then I’ll begin.
Once long ago- well only last week really,
a prince rode his mighty horse through the mighty Kingdom of Vince McMahon.
Enter Jericho on a donkey
Shane- Chris what the heel do you think
you’re doing, I said PRINCE not jerk
Jericho- Well just because you’re jealous
that I’ve got a job and you don’t doesn’t mean you have to call me names.
Shane- why not you do it all the time?
Jericho- that’s different!
Shane- Oh really? It doesn’t matter anyway
get your ass of stage and can we have the real prince enter.
Jericho rides of in a sulk and in rides
Jeff Hardy on a mutli-coloured horse that matched his hair.
Shane- where the hell did you find a horse
that colour?
Jeff- I didn’t he was white originally I
had to give him a make over.
Shane- Okay! Back to the story.
Shane- the prince was mighty bored. He had
nothing to do as his father was to busy watching all the pretty ladies in
waiting.
Jeff- Oh me be mighty bored
Shane- yeah they know! The prince rode
through the lands until he came upon a small cottage.
Jeff- Ooo! What a pretty little cottage, I
think I’ll go see he owns it!
Shane- and so the mighty prince got off
his horse and knocked on the small wooden door of the cottage.
Jeff- open up in the name of the mighty
Prince Jeffery of McMahon.
?- What?
Jeff- I said open up in the name of the
mighty Prince Jeffery of…
? - What?
Jeff- I said open up in the name of the
mighty…
? - What?
Jeff- are you deaf man? Open this door
right now.
Shane- the door flew open to reveal the
venomous bald headed rattlesnake.
Austin- What? What? Mighty Prince… What? I
said mighty prince ordering me around… What? I should kick his ass right now…
What?
Jeff- Good man I mean no harm to you only
that I’m bored right now and I know that you have the largest stock in all the
lands of beer.
Austin- Beer… What? You want beer? Then
you’ve come to the right place… What?
Shane- and so the mighty prince joined the
rattlesnake in a drinking game. It was not ‘til much later when he stumbled out
of the cottage and attempted to ride his horse back to his palace.
Jeff- burp Me be mighty drunk. OH
YES OH YES. Mighty Prince be mighty drunk burp.
Shane- typical. Anyway Jeff somehow
managed to make it back to the palace and was helped to his room by some kind
servants.
The next morning Jeff awoke to the sound
of a Very loud horn.
Jeff- Ow Ow. Head hurt. Will someone
please stop that horn blowing before I find them and shove it straight up
their…
Shane- Hey! Non of that Jeff. It’s your
fault you drunk that much.
Jeff- still rubbing his head And
just whose stupid story is it that made me get drunk? Hey Shane?
Shane- don’t shout at me I’m just the
narrator not the writer. I just read what’s written. Now back to the story.
Jeff awoke to the mighty sound and in a shock remembered today was the day in
which his father had invited the entire Princess’ of the kingdoms around so he
could choose a suitor.
Quickly Jeff got dressed and hurried down
to the grand hall, where his father awaited him.
In the hall sat on a very large chair that
was meant to pass as a throne sat Vince McMahon and at his side sat his Queen
Trish.
McMahon- about time you got here son. I
didn’t go to all the trouble of bringing these pretty girls here just for me
you know!
Jeff- that’ll be a change
Trish- be nice to your father
Jeff- yeah whatever slut
McMahon- hey. Quit whining and choose a
wife will ya.
Shane- and so it began. Jeff sat on his
throne by his father’s side as each of the girls came forwards to introduce
themselves. Amongst the many was a leggy blonde who went by the name Stacy
daughter of King Keibler of Cookie.
Stacy- don’t you just love my long legs
and firm ass?
Jeff- erm… how shall I say this so I don’t
hurt her feelings.
Shane- just tell her you’re the type who
likes big tits instead.
Jeff- gee thanks lots of help that’s gonna
be. Next you’ll be suggesting I chose your sister for a wife.
Shane- I never said that.
Jeff- no but you might as well have done.
Stacy- excuse me but can we please get
back to me and my long legs and firm ass.
Shane & Jeff- Sorry
Jeff- oh dearest Stacy daughter of King
Keibler of Cookie I have no honest opinion of your ass and legs for I am one
who is interested more in the mind than in the looks of a lady.
Stacy- fine. Your father showed more
interest in me anyway.
Shane- typical. Jeff sat for hour’s
waiting for the right girl to appear but by the time supper had arrived the
perfect girl had still yet to present herself.
The court retired to the dining hall in
which they ate a great feast then were entertained by the masterful choke
artist Jericho.
Jericho- you know something Shane. Every
damn time I’m in these stories of yours I always end up in the worst part. One
of these days I’ll get a decent part. I mean I am the undisputed champion I do
deserve a little more respect than this.
Shane- Shut up Jericho and entertain the
guests.
Jericho- Oh yes mighty narrator type
person.
Jericho- hey mighty prince, wanna know why
your stepsister and the doorknob are so much in common?
Jeff- not really I already know but you
might as well tell the others anyway
Jericho- gee thanks for the enthusiasm. So
overwhelming you know. Anyway the answer is they both get a turn.
Audience- laughs
Jericho- Brill. My job done now I think
I’ll retreat to some place other than here.
Shane- you do that jackass.
Jericho- whatever pussy
Shane- bye now pretty boy. Back to the
story. It was amongst the festivities that Jeff spotted the girl of his dreams.
Jeff- My what a hot chick. She’s mine.
Shane- the chosen one was a blonde and had
an attitude. Jeff walked over to the young girl
Jeff- hey beautiful. Your leg must be
tired cos you’ve been running through my mind all day.
Girl- Am I meant to be bowled over by that
or something. That is one of the lamest pick up lines I’ve ever heard. I mean
can’t you come up with anything better you are meant to be a prince after all.
Jeff- sorry. I was told to say that, see
its right here in the script.
Girl- whoever wrote this is a jackass then
it’s lame.
Jeff- tell me about it. I know whom the
narrator is we could take it out on him.
Girl- Yeah lets do that. Then after that
hows about we go for a coffee?
Jeff- sure.
Shane hey guys what are you doing? Hey
that’s my arm. Owww that hurt!
God help. Hey Jeff not the baseball bat
please god not the baseb…
The End