Cool/Funny Quotes

A touch of reality

When you are sad, I will get drunk with you and help you plot revenge aginist the scum-sucking bastard who made you sad

When you are blue, I'll try and dislodge whatever is chocking you

When you smile, I will know you finally got laid.

When you are scared, I will bug you about it every chance I get

When you are worried, I will tell you horrible stories about how much worse it could be and to quit whining

When you are confused, I will use little words to explain it to your dumb ass

When you are sick, Stay away from me until you are well again, I don't want what you have

When you fall over, I will point and laugh at your clumsy ass

This is my oath, I plead to the end Why you may ask?'Cause I am your friend

You can fall from the sky, You can fall from a tree, But the best way to fall, Is in love with me

'I know I'm not perfect, but I'm so close it's scary.'

I know you think I’m hot, I know you think I’m fine, but like every other guy take a number and wait in line.

So you're the bitch, that told the bitch, that I'm a bitch, well listen bitch, it takes a bitch, to know a bitch, to call a bitch, a bitch, BITCH

A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort

I tried to see things from your point of view, but i couldn't shove my head that far up my ass

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust, life is short so party we must

I don't worship the devil, the devil worships me

I’m not a tease, just a reminder of what you can’t have.

"Reality is boring lets hold hands and skip off into the sunset of a dream"

'Whoever said money doesn't buy you happiness must be shopping at the wrong malls.'

'I'm an angel I promise, the horns are just there to keep my halo up.'

'Be yourself and do what you want 'cause the people who mind don't matter and the people who matter don't mind.'

'I laugh in the face of danger, then I go and hide until it goes away.'

'I didn't ask to be a princess, but if the crown fits, why not?'

'B.I.T.C.H - Babe In Total Control of Herself.'

'I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.'

'I get energy from your jealousy, ever wonder why I'm so hyper?'

'You're just jealous 'cause the voices are talking to me'

'Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but you are just abusing the privilege'

'For all of you who talk about me, thank-you for making me the centre of your world'

'Money talks, mine always says good-bye'

'Don't hate me because I'm beautiful, hate me because your boyfriend thinks I am'

'I'm loved by some, hated by many, envied by most, yet wanted by plenty'