MoRe PoEmS

My Emotions are a hollow valley,
Fear...
Emptiness...
Sorrow, pity...
Not being able to control the urge to feel sorry for myself.
Everywhere I turn the doorway is blocked, unable to escape.
I am so lost.
Finding that I want to run away from myself, my life, my problems.
Why do I always run away from what I want or need?
So scared of unnecessary pain.
Even if it brings joy, I still run.
I can't be true with myself, how am I supposed to be trusted to be true to others.
I can't be.
Don't tell me I'm pretty, that you like me.
I am not as I appear.
I am ugly,
Selfish,
And so lost in a tunnell of assorted emotions.
So good at masking my hurting soul...

I never quite understood, What they did for you, I can't get you out of my head, my heart, my soul. Memories overwhelm me until I soak myself in tears. Discovering that things will never be the same for us again, I never thought I would have to stop caring for you. Awaiting our next visit, So many questions rush thru my head... Why can't I stop thinking about you? Constant pain... Constant yourning.. When I see you, When I talk to you, You are my Drug. An addiction so strong... I wish I could stop. Unknowing and unwilling to tell, scared of the ultimate humiliation it will bring..

Down a hall of hollow emptiness
All the memories of him lay before her
His smile
His eyes
His laugh
She is blinded by her unconditional love for him
Choosing to block out any bad.

The hall seems never ending
Things that are said
Things she sees...
They are all him.

Wondering this hall of mindgames
She tries to stay strong
Occasionally stumbling upon uncaring souls
Disorientated and alone, these feelings never depart.

The doors of the hall consist of many
Outside some, are large stacked objects
Making entry or an exit impossible
She tries to keep a smile as she goes
Eyes struggling to stay dry, filled with pain.

She is ugly inside
He made her like this
What was once sunny and bright
Is now dark, hollow and endlessly lonely.

She longs for an open door to come along
A new someone to lift her up and take her out
To allow her to never feel this pain again

Buring herself deeper and deeper
Crying so much that it doesnt even matter anymore
It's not him who needs to be saved anymore.

Killing herself with her favorite weapon
He calls her name, killing her more and more With each word he speaks.
Falling to the floor, exhausted by this journey
When will her feelings of want and need leave?
When will she be able to leave the way of life she has developed?

Down a hall of hollow emptiness.

Sitting alone in a dark room.
Sees no hope, sees no future.
He once lite her room,
But now she sits in the dark.
He's no where to be found.
She's everywhere to be found.
But she only aims to be found by one person.
A person who has no will to seek her.
They once were 2 different people.
But now so alike it scares them both.
So her room remains dark and lonely,
And he remains untouchable and lost.