Everything I learned in life, I learned from Rob Thomas
Friends should be constantly reminding you to never lick phone books.
It's okay to be a male rock star and still have manicures.
There's nothing wrong with having the same haircut for over four years, even if it's less than flattering.
Playing with band-mates is not childish.
Getting hit on by a gay truck driver can leave you scarred for life.
Singing with Santana will increase your popularity, if it doesn't, at least it'll get you a Grammy.
Never win a Grammy without your band-mates, if you do, buy a bullet proof vest.
Watch out for traffic.
If someone steals your wallet, call the police. Don't wait until they come back to beat you up.
Being deathly afraid of laser pointers does not decrease your masculinity.
Talk about your penis as often as you can.
and most importantly...
Try not to be seen with a dead hooker
