I Think I'm In Love
Title: I Think I'm In Love (2/2)
Disclaimer: Not mine!
Rating: PG
Comments: This is a two part story. The first part is a Kyle POV and the next is a Tess POV. This is a very shippy piece for all those who have a little Lamp Trimmer inside of 'em. Toodles and send feedback! Lotsa feedback!
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It's her
I know it's her, and it is making me crazy.
Especially since Christmas. Before, any feelings I had for her were pure lust.
Then she had to go and take my breath away. Who would have thought that she would manage to make my Dad so happy. I mean, it's been a long time since my Dad has smiled, really smiled. Or laughed. Sure, our life isn't glamorous here in deadbeat Roswell...but we had each other. Even if we rarely spoke. When -she- came....it was if everything had been turned upside down. Jumped on a few times...and shot to hell.
The first few weeks were hard. My bedroom walls had been stripped of every Playboy, Hustler, and Busty Biker Babes picture in sight. She even had the nerve to rip up my bra-clad Britney Spears poster hanging next to the shower. Something about me being a "pervert", and a lecture on how any boy over 12 with one of her teeny bopper posters needed a cold shower and some mental help.
It was frustrating to say the least. Of course their were some good things about her being there. Things were clean. I don't mean 'shove everything under the bed' clean, but actually spotless. Laundry got done. Food was cooked. The house for once was decent. I still don't think that it was enough for my Dad to really accept the whole arrangement. Or maybe he did and I just wasn't clued into the whole thing. Maybe I was the one who was against it from the start. Having a woman in the house didn't feel right. The impending memory I have of any woman in this house is my mother walking out on us. I still remember that night.
They were fighting as usual....nothing different about that. That night though...they weren't as loud. I think my Mom was just...tired of fighting. That's when I heard it. The slamming of a door...the sound of wheels crunching the pavement with a loud squeal. Not that someone as young as I was would understand the whole picture, but I knew what was going on. I spent that night crying....sobbing.
I felt betrayed. How could she just leave....her family? How could she leave my dad...and me? If she really loved me wouldn't she have stayed? I think that's why I'm so scared right now. She's going to leave and I know it. This whole alien thing....all of us know it's dangerous. They could leave us humans behind. Or maybe one day I'll upset her...and she'll just get fed up. Like my Mom did.
She's definitely easy on the eyes. I mean..Liz was beautiful, but more of a modest beautiful. Vicky was hot...anyone with bleached blonde hair and a body to die for, at our school usually is though. But she's different, by a long shot. There's that whole cute, innocent thing she has going for her...one of those little cherubic angel faces. Pale skin. Full lips. She's got this feisty walk too. Timid at first...but there is confidence there. Strength. The one thing that drives me over the edge is those eyes.
Piercing and deep.
Vulnerable.
I know that she has this whole destiny thing with Max, which pisses me off. Evan's steals all of my women. Maybe my karma will turn around and I'll get what I want.
I want her.
Just her.
Tess.
I think I'm in love.
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Longing.
Wanting.
Fear.
Feelings that cloud my existence everyday. Longing to be needed. Wanting to be accepted. Fearing my destiny. I've never had the chance to just be me. Even with Nasedo...I was just a commodity. A ticket back home. Maybe I always thought that I was destined for greatness. After all I had once lived a life with my lover, a king. Maybe I did have some worth. The more I remember that life...the more I realize that I will never have it. History may be doomed to repeat itself...but it won't repeat itself with me as I once was. Since I was young I've been training. For combat...for a reunion of me and my own kind. To think I thought I had everything figured out. There was even an agenda. Meet Max again. Make him realize his love for me. Return to our planet.
Liz.
She wasn't part of the agenda. She was what stood between me and greatness. Ok, so I was angry at first. Fumed. I hated her for taking everything I wanted. Everything I was. I was the stupid one though I guess. I was raised with a man who molded me...tried to make me this...Queen. There was never a moment where I could deny him. He was the only father I had ever known. He told me that things would be different. This wasn't who I was and getting wrapped up in it would only hurt me in the end. He was right.
I was a Queen who had been plucked from a crowd by the gentle king. I had been happy. For a while at least. Nasedo never taught me about my human side. Everything was powers this...control that. I grew up with someone who would kill humans on whim. When I was little I was scared he might even kill me. Just for being half human. Being as alien as possible has driven me all these years.
The man who taught me everything I know is dead now. Killed by our enemy's. In my eyes he was more powerful than any of us...his powers had developed...to me he was immortal. If he could die then...none of us were safe
This is why I'm in my current dilemma. The sheriff took me in, which was great and all. I'm protected. And I have a place to stay. Nothing's permanent though. I've always roamed...a royal nomad at best. Staying in one place for too long just....gets you attached. Let's start off with what's been bugging me lately.
HIM.
He didn't like me from the start. I was just some chick impending on his dire social life. I was the sister he never wanted. In the beginning, maybe it thrilled me to get a rise out of him. Then I began to see the real him. He wasn't this super jock, jerk, athlete. He was scared too. Insecure. He was like me. Behind this whole facade...watching him was becoming an..obsession for me. It was hitting home for me. If I searched deep enough...looked in his eyes I could see the pain. I'd heard the gossip and all. About his Mom. Maybe someone who raised you leaving on purpose hurts more than them dying. They actually make the decision that your not reason enough to stay.
What do I know though, right?
I'm confused.
Wouldn't you be confused too?
I've never had time for boys. Again with the whole attachment thing. Everyone thinks I'm this..hussy bitch who wants to steal Max. That's not it at all. I've saved myself for Max. Waited to have what I once did. And I'm still..waiting to have that. But that wasn't my life...not at all. These are just memories of someone else. I'm just a copy.
I've been having these thoughts. Dreams. What if I never give myself to Max? What if I end up...with
-him-? Or am I wrong. Is he like every other human boy?
I don't know if I can really keep my feelings a secret anymore. He isn't what I've dreamed of, or what I've been taught to want.
I can't help it.
I want him.
Just him.
Kyle.
I think I'm in love.
THE END!
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