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By subscription only! Welcome to another issue of:
"THE BALANCED WOMAN".
Thanks to all of you who have encouraged your friends to subscribe! You are important to us. So rest assured we will NEVER sell or give away your email addresses to anyone!!
We realize that not all of the email programs available can accommodate our size. So you can also find this issue of The Balanced Woman at: http://www.betweenfriends.vjungle.com/issue21.html
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IN THIS ISSUE
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=> Welcome
=> Feature Article: "Balancing
Your Life to Your Personality"
=> Household Hint
=> Column: "10 Fashion Mistakes
that Can Spoil Your Look"
=> Parenting Tip
=> Classified Ads
=> Column:"Finding Happiness Today"
=> Pampering Yourself
=> Can You Help this Reader?
=> Help Others without Spending
a Dime!
=> Subscribe/Un subscribe information
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WELCOME
I can't believe a new year is upon us already. It seems that the older I get, the faster time flies! This year is a particularly important one for me. I turn 40 on the 5th of this month! I couldn't let this momentous occassion pass without a few thoughts about it. They're posted at http://betweenfriends.vjungle.com/40.html
I hope you all had a joyous and wonderful holiday season! As we enter another year it brings with it more opportunities for new beginnings, fresh starts and hope for the future. May your new year bring you all of that along with an ever abundance of happiness and joy...
That's it for now. I hope you enjoy this issue!
jackie
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Site Updates...http://www.betweenfriends.org
Last month we ran this reader's question, "Any ideas on how to remove that moldy smell from, in this case, curtains that have been stored in a wardrobe for too long???" You can find all of YOUR wonderful responses at http://www.betweenfriends.vjungle.com/mold.html
Please stop by and cast your vote at our completely anonymous site poll, if you haven't yet. This month's poll asks: Do you keep your New Year's resolutions? While there, you'll also find the results of the previous poll at http://www.betweenfriends.org/poll.html
This month's recipe is again from our friends at Minute Meals.com. It's Rigatoni alla Norcina. I've tried it and as always it's quick, delicious, easy and good! You can find the link for it at http://www.betweenfriends.org/househol.htm
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Feature Article: Balancing Your Life to Your Personality
By: Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale
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Given that I produce an ezine called "The Balanced Woman" I probably spend more time than most thinking about how to create a life of balance. I have searched and searched for that one magic formula that will work for everybody all the time. What I have found instead is that the basic core of a "balanced life" must revolve around each person's unique personality. If it does not, it is doomed to fail! What do I mean? It struck me this past week while watching my neighbor on vacation from her job.
"Karla" has been described by her family as the "Energizer Bunny". She rarely sits down or still. She is ALWAYS on the move. If she's not working, she's cleaning out every closet in the house, going for a run, entertaining an entire football team of people or taking down every strip of wallpaper in her house and painting instead! Even thinking about all she does makes me tired! Not surprisingly, she goes to bed late and gets up early. She goes, goes, goes and gets a TON accomplished in the process.
I, on the other hand, go to bed early and rise late. I need more than eight hours of sleep and a lot of time for myself. Thinking about all I "should" do overwhelms me and leads me to do not much at all. I HATE to clean, dislike to cook and tolerate laundering only because my family needs clean clothes to wear. If left to my own devices I'd read for hours and surf the net for days. But having some sense of responsibility I DO cook; I DO clean and I DO make sure that there's food in the fridge. It's just that I "could" do so much more.
I could order those valences for my windows that I've been swearing I'll get, for the last two years. I could pick out that new bedspread I've wanted for 14 months now. I could clean out the toys in the backyard and take all that "stuff" to Goodwill that's been sitting in the garage for months. I could clean out my kitchen cupboards. I could organize the linen closet. There's so much I COULD do--but I don't.
Karla, on the other hand, could take time for herself. She could read that book she's wanted to read. She could take that luxurious, relaxing soak in the tub. She could go out for a long, leisurely, sinful dinner. She could spend more time with her spouse or kids. There's so much she doesn't HAVE to do--but she does.
Karla and I must try to balance our lives in very different ways. If I try to pack every day with as many activities as I can, I'll most assuredly set myself up for failure. Conversely, if Karla tries to slow her days down, she will fail too. She is the hare; I am the tortoise. These are personality characteristics inherent within us and distinctly our own. Without GREAT effort neither one of us can change that significantly. So we must learn to work within the framework of who we are to achieve the same goal.
First, we both must define exactly what it is we need to do to put more balance into our lives. This is unique to each person. A life of balance is one that WE define for ourselves, not one that is defined for us by others. Then we must replace some of our current activities (or lack of activities, in my case) with efforts that are more in line with what we really want to achieve.
Karla might decide that she wants to spend more time with her kids. If so, she could replace cleaning the closets with playing catch with them or going for a walk. They could all go to the beach or shopping at the mall. Whatever they choose to do together, they should make sure that they're actually "doing" something because that's the kind of person Karla is.
I might decide I want to complete some of tasks I've been going to "get around to doing". If so, I must replace SOME of the time I spend reading or surfing the net on other, more productive activities. I could make a "to do" list daily and chip away at the projects I want to complete.
I'll be more likely to be successful if I break down some of the bigger tasks into smaller, more manageable pieces. Instead of promising myself that I'll clean all of the kitchen cupboards, I could clean out one at a time. In just a few weeks, the whole kitchen will eventually be completed. Instead of tackling the whole linen closet in one day I could work on a quarter of it at a time, until it has been organized in its entirety. Instead of spending an entire day shopping for and ordering valances, I could measure the windows one-day, pick out fabric for the valances the next and actually order them on another day still. I could set aside just 15 minutes every day to do something I should do, like vacuuming the house. But whatever I do, I must make sure that my "to do" list is never too long or I'll quickly burn out and give up completely.
Observing Karla this past week and comparing our styles, I learned that
there is no magic formula for putting balance back into your life.
What works for one may not work for another because we are all inherently
so different. But one thing is for certain, both the hare and the
tortoise ultimately finished the race. And in the end, that's all
that matters…
Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale is a CPA and the editor of Between Friends: Resources for Mothers (http://www.betweenfriends.org) Between Friends contains household hints, time management tips, articles on organization, parenting, money management, career, self employment, self improvement and more! Subscribe to its FREE monthly ezine, The Balanced Woman. Visit today!
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> > > Your Kids & The
Web < < <
"Love your newsletter! Great info in short format for busy people!"~
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Sites 4 Moms is a free, weekly ezine that searches out the best sites for parents and children, We'll point you to websites that are worth the time it takes to visit. To subscribe send a blank mailto:subscribe-sites-4moms@xc.org or visit www.stretcher.com/menu/subscrib-s4m.cfm
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will surely be of help to you! http://www.domestricks.com
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HOUSEHOLD HINT OF THE MONTH
To eliminate the painful experience of removing a plastic bandage from a child's skin, saturate a cotton ball with baby oil and rub it gently over the bandage. The bandage will now (painlessly) lift off the child's skin.
From Emazing.com (http://www.emazing.com)
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Stop nagging and fighting with your kids! Get your home running
more smoothly than it has ever run before. Discover a simple, effective
and proven system for putting sanity back into your life with the new ebook
THE BUSINESS OF MOM!
Do you know what busy executives and moms have in common? Everything! They both have too much to do and too little time to do it in. Busy executives have spent years developing, analyzing and testing systems to help them cope. A few of those concepts have withstood the test of time and are used again and again by the most successful business managers today. They have been adapted to the home environment to give moms help too.
If you haven't ordered your copy yet, you can still get THE BUSINESS OF MOM for $15.00. The first 100 to order will also receive membership to an exclusive discussion group designed to support you as you implement the theories from THE BUSINESS OF MOM!
For a full description and to order your copy securely, visit my Web site at http://www.betweenfriends.org/1.htm
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"10 Fashion Mistakes That Can Spoil Your Look"
Copyright (c) 2000
by Diana Pemberton-Sikes
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While the world may be leaning toward more casual attire, there are still a number of fashion faux pas you need to avoid regardless of the occasion or dresscode. They include:
1. Wearing The Wrong Colors
All skin tones are not created equal. The lime green or hot pink
that you saw on the runways may look fabulous on the models, but horrible
on you. Experiment with different colors and stick with the palettes
that look best on you, regardless of what's
“au currant”. Don't waste your money on clothes that make you
look pale, sallow, jaundiced, or washed out.
2. Wearing Too Small a Size
If it doesn't fit, don't wear it. Squeezing into a size 8 may
feed your vanity, but it will may you appear overfed to everyone else.
Shop by FIT, not by size. If you can't sit down or feel as trussed
up as a turkey, you're not going to feel your best. Why put yourself
through that kind of torture? Find clothes that fit or have them
tailored to fit and stack thecards in your favor.
3. Inappropriate Makeup
Light for day, heavier for evening, sheer for sports or other strenuous
pursuits. You wear different clothes for different activities in
you life; your makeup should change as well. And if you're still
doing Cleopatra eyes, it's time to turn the page and
see what's happening THIS century in makeup styles.
4. Wearing The Wrong Color of Hose
You'll look taller and trimmer by matching the color of your hose to
your shoes and your hem. Wearing a black skirt and shoes? Opt
for sheer black hose. Have a bright blue dress and taupe shoes?
Go for the taupe-colored hose. What? You only wear black hose
because they hide things you don't want people to see? Well, guess what:
unless your whole outfit's black, you're CALLING ATTENTION to your legs.
If that's not what you want, it's time to rethink your plan.
5. Rundown Shoes
You look great...from the ankles up. If your shoes have seen
better days, find a good shoe repair shop and put them in for some TLC.
Polish them regularly. Use a felt tip marker on scuffs, and put a
piece of soft carpet under your feet when you drive. And most importantly,
invest in a good pair if you're going to wear them every day. Don't
buy them at the 5 and Dime
and then wonder why they don't last.
6. Broken Nails, Chipped Polish.
Keep your nails clean and evenly trimmed. To make repairs quickly,
have clippers and a nail file in your purse and desk at work. Paint
over chips or remove all polish. If you're in a business environment,
stick with conservative nail polish colors at work and save the sparkly/neon/funky
looks for weekends and vacations. Dragon-lady lengths are never appropriate
for business.
7. Slips That Show
Unfortunately, one length does NOT fit all. Buy slips in several
lengths and replace them once the elastic wears. For the most discreet
linings, buy slips in the colors you wear most often, like black, navy,
beige, and white. You want to mute the sheerness of your garment—not
all attention to the color of your slip.
8. Underarm Stains
First, buy deodorant that works with your body. You may have
to try a few to find the best one for you, and you may need to change every
now and again if your chemistry changes, like after having a baby, starting
new medication, going through menopause, or the like. My personal
favorite: Mitchum solid. If you perspire heavily or need a
surefire method to prevent stains, consider using dress shields.
9. Visible Bra Lines
Make sure your bra fits properly. If it rides up in back, slips
of the shoulders, or lets your breasts sag instead of offering support,
then it's time to seek professional help. You can usually find trained
fitters in the lingerie departments of better
department stores. Call around for an appointment.
10. Roots
Hair color can do wonderful things for you, but it can also be hard
on the budget. If you can't afford the regular maintenance required
by all over color, consider getting highlights instead. And whatever
you do, make sure your hair color matches your skin tone. Take a
few minutes to attend to the details. Why spoil your look when looking
great is nearly as easy?
Diana Pemberton-Sikes is an image consultant and owner of http://www.FashionForRealWomen.com
Love fashion or just want to look great? Learn how to dress
well whatever your age, shape, size, or budget. Subscribe to “Style
Made Simple” at www.FashionForRealWomen.com <http://www.fashionforrealwomen.com/>
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PARENTING TIP OF THE MONTH
What Is A Secret
As parents we have so much to worry about in regards to our children. We want to protect them from all of lifes dangers, yet we want to accomplish this without putting unnecessary fear into their lives.
When my children were small, we began talking about secrets. What is a good secret and what is a bad secret? This seemed to be a concept my children could understand, while accomplishing my goal of not scaring them.
Good secrets are things that you get to tell mommy or daddy. Such as we bought daddy a birthday gift. Today it's a secret but tomorrow we get to tell daddy. Another good secret is when the principal at school tells you there will be a party for your teacher but today it's a secret. Tomorrow however we get to tell the teacher.
As your children get a bit older, a good secret might even be your friend telling you she likes a boy. While your child may be asked not to tell the boy, your child could certainly tell you this secret.
So what is a bad secret? A bad secret is a secret that your child is asked to NEVER tell. A bad secret might be another child admitting they did something wrong and asking your child not to tell. It might also be an adult acting inappropriately with your child and telling the child to keep this a secret and not tell mommy.
My kids asked of course, "who will tell us bad secrets?". I began to tell them that bad people tell bad secrets, and quickly realized this is not true at all. Instead I chose to tell them that a bad secret can come from both a child and an adult who is doing something wrong. To this day I still believe that only someone doing something wrong will ask a child to keep a secret from mommy or daddy.
My kids and I spent many hours talking about secrets and that mommy and/or daddy must always be told secrets. I also assured them that they would NEVER get in trouble for telling mommy or daddy a secret. I can remember a few times, my kids slipping and telling a good secret when they weren't supposed to, but I kept my word and they never got in trouble.
You see, I have often heard that someone acting inappropriately will say "if you tell your mommy, you will get in trouble". I never wanted my child to have a visual image of getting in trouble for telling mommy a secret.
Audrey Okaneko is a mom of two children, ages 10 and 17. She can be visited at http://www.shining-stars.com You can write to her at IHavSnoopy@aol.com
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Article: Passing Thoughts, Finding Happiness Today
by T.W. Winslow
http://www.mysticbeagle.com
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I'll be happy as soon as I get that promotion at work. Once I
get married, I know I'll be happy. If I could only get out of debt,
then I'd be happy. If my husband would only pay more attention to
me, I know I'd be happy.
Do these things sound familiar? Are you putting off your happiness
waiting for that certain something which is going to change your life?
Are you depending on someone else for your happiness? If so, you
may be in for a long wait.
So often we buy into the fallacy that something or someone is going to come along and make us happy - a new job, more money, a better relationship, etc. And until that happens, we resign to being unhappy and unfulfilled. The fact of the matter is, if we aren't happy now, most probably, we never will be no matter what may come our way down the line.
Sure, we all want better things for ourselves. This is perfectly
normal, and we should never stop trying to improve our lives and our relationships.
However, we can't postpone our happiness waiting for these changes to be
realized. We must find happiness now.
A big part of this is not depending upon others, our current circumstance,
or material possessions to make us happy. We must take responsibility
for our own happiness, and find it in our very existence and in how we
live our lives. Happiness is nothing more than attitude and fulfillment.
The old saying, "Either our glass is half full or half empty," is very
true indeed. How we perceive our lives, who we are, and what we make
of our current situations, has everything to do with our ultimate happiness
and personal fulfillment.
If we continually look down to road for our happiness, we'll never find it, as with our every step forward, the horizon moves one step further away. Consequently, happiness and fulfillment may forever allude us.
If our eyes are always fixed on the horizon, we'll most certainly miss what's right at our feet. The simple fact is, happiness and fulfillment are within our grasp - right here, right now. Life is a journey, and we make it what it is - good or bad. For happiness and fulfillment doesn't come at the end of the journey, but rather, is found in the journey itself.
T.W. Winslow is a popular writer and columnist. His Passing Thoughts column is read by millions around the world each week. If you would like a new Passing Thoughts article sent to you each week via email, just send a blank email to: mysticbeagle-subscribe@listbot.com
T.W. Winslow is also the creator of The Mystic Beagle, a web site
which offers its visitors relationship advice, romance tips, true love
stories, worst date stories, article, and more. http://www.mysticbeagle.com
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Pampering Yourself
Do all of the things you want to do once you "lose weight", or "get another job", " or "find a partner" or whatever reason you've been putting them off. Don't put them off anymore. Do them now!
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Can You Help
this Reader?
"How do you get a sticky substance off of a rayon/polyester dress? A friend e-mailed me asking if I knew. She said a label (such as: Hello. My name is_______) was put on the dress and forgotten and then the dress was washed. It left a sticky adhesive on the dress and we don't know how to get if off. Thanks in advance for the help. I'll pass it on to my friend."
Please send your suggetions to me at jahale95@yahoo.com with "label" in the subject.
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Disclaimer
The appearance of advertising in The Balanced Woman should not be interpreted
as an endorsement by the editors of the service, product, business, or
program being advertised. We take no responsibility for claims or
representations made in any ads. The Balanced Woman is for informational
and entertainment purposes only. The ideas and information expressed
in it have not been approved or authorized by anyone either explicitly
or implicitly. In no event shall Jacqueline McLaughlin Hale be liable
for any damages whatsoever resulting from any action arising in connection
with the use of this information or its publication, including any action
for infringement of copyright or defamation. The opinions expressed
by our columnists are not necessarily the position of The Balanced Woman.
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Copyright 1999, 2000, 2001 JA Hale
Editor's Comments: If any of you have any ideas, comments and suggestions
on how we can improve this e-zine please let me know. Just send an
email to: jahale95@yahoo.com
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