“Can’t believe what?” Maria grinned and exchanged glances with me. Another exhibition of Livi’s specially branded ecstasy was currently in full flow, propelling us towards the spot under the trees by the art building- our spot, at least when it came to eating lunch.
“Everything!” Livi danced some more and I had to laugh. “Me being class president, for starters. And you”- she turned to a stunned but giggling (again?) Maria triumphantly- “getting together with Ollie Robertson!”
Maria grinned, then paused. “We’re not exactly ‘together’,” she argued, not very convincingly for someone who prided themselves on their debating skills.
Livi waved the tiny technicality out the way with a sweep of her hand. “It’s only a matter of time,” she asserted confidently, and even as Maria and I glanced at each in amusement, neither of us could possibly doubt her. Doubting Livi Wilkins was practically sacrilege in itself, I thought with a grin as we reached the cluster of trees that were supposed to shelter us from the weather of autumnal Maine.
“Oh.” Livi had suddenly stopped. Then, reluctantly, “Hey.”
I took a look at whom she was speaking to- speaking to with so little enthusiasm it was intriguing in itself. A guy I didn’t recognize, a guy with long dark brown hair and holes in the knees of his jeans, was sitting calmly against one of the tree trunks, eating a sandwich whilst reading a book of indeterminate title and apparently oblivious to the cold in a short-sleeved white t-shirt. It didn’t take a genius to work out that in a tiny place like Buckley, this was the new kid. Livi’s guess at gender had been way off, I thought with a wry smile to myself.
“Hey.” He looked up with a smile, choosing to ignore Livi’s less than keen greeting. “Olivia, right?” He jumped to his feet, leaving his sandwich propping open the page he had reached in his book. “Keven,” he introduced himself, sticking his hand out towards Maria and I as Livi regarded him a tad coldly to say they’d met only briefly earlier that day. Maria smiled uncertainly, taking her cue from Livi, and shook his hand first. “Maria,” she nodded, her dark curls bouncing in the wind as she did so.
“August,” I told him, shaking his hand and suddenly feeling extremely guilty for the way in which my two friends had already retreated. What was with that?
“Cool.” He grinned and I noticed his front tooth was chipped. “You couldn’t tell me where the guidance office is, could you?” he asked, halfway between embarrassed and apologetic.
“Sure. Um, go through the main entrance and turn left. Second- no, sorry, third door on your right. If you see the auditorium up ahead, you’re on the right track.”
“Thanks.” He nodded and scooped up his book and half-eaten sandwich from beneath the trees. He waved, extending the gesture to Livi, who nodded curtly, and Maria, who smiled weakly and raised her hand in a half wave. “See you around,” he added absently, as he trotted towards the main building with all the ease of someone who had been at East Buckley for years.
Not that I would have wished that on anyone.
I joined Livi and Maria as they unwrapped their lunches a little way off. “He,” stated Livi with a disbelieving shake of her blonde head, “is seriously weird.”
“How so?” Maria’s eyes widened slightly as she chewed her own sandwich, new gossip no doubt on the way.
“Look at him!” Livi gestured to his retreating back. “He’s hardly going to fit in here, is he?” She shook her head again. “But anyway, enough about the freaky new kid. Let’s talk some more about Maria and Ollie.” She looked almost as happy and fulfilled as when she and Sam had cemented their status as East Buckley’s king and queen by starting to date almost two years ago.
Maria smiled widely. I, meanwhile, felt like I was going ever so slightly mad. Last year, I would have gladly devoured this conversation just as hungrily as Livi and Maria were doing at this moment in time. But now? I bristled from them dismissing the new kid so readily, just because he seemed faintly offbeat. And I just couldn’t engage with the revolving issues of school spirit and gorgeous guys. What was wrong with me? These were my best friends. We’d been inseparable since day one. So why did I now, suddenly, feel miles apart from them?
“What do you think, August?” Livi was watching me expectantly, waiting for a credible reply to whatever she was asking me about. Not that it was really very hard to clue into what they’d been chatting about.
“Sorry?” I switched my eyes quickly back to the two of them.
Livi pulled a discontented face. “You’ve been like this all day,” she scolded, tutting like a five-year-old child she didn’t particularly like. “What’s wrong with you, girl?”
Good question.
“I’m fine,” I started to tell her, hoping my lie was destined to be a convincing one, but I needn’t have worried. She had already gilded onwards with her train of thought. “And I wish you wouldn’t insist on wearing those…. things,” she sniffed, like the fashion expert she was, eyeing my faded jeans and long grey duffel coat with measured disdain.
“What’s wrong with….”
“Come on, August.” Livi had progressed into a full speed put down. “You seem to be in a really strange place lately.”
Make that all my life.
“I thought we were going to have so much fun this year,” Livi continued, her voice softening. “Our last year in high school.” She looked almost wistful, like it had all been one fantastic adventure. But then again, for Liv, it probably had been. I had stumbled through school trying my hardest to survive. Livi had breezed through as though East Buckley had been purpose-built for her social growth. “But you wouldn’t run for the school council or rejoin the debating society with us”- she indicated Maria and herself, Maria studiously quiet- “and you wouldn’t even consider trying out for the cheerleading squad.” She looked at me with more than a trace of disappointment, and I didn’t know whether to be angry or upset, or simply both.
“Livi….” I rolled my eyes. “With all due respect, I hardly think I’d be an asset to any cheerleading squad.” I shuddered inwardly at the thought.
“But you could have been!” Livi pointed out. “We had such a great time, freshman year. If you’d have just carried on….” She trailed off meaningfully.
“What? If I could have just carried on, what would have happened?” I raised an eyebrow at her.
Livi seemed to sense the fact I was extremely close to blowing a fuse. “It doesn’t matter,” she said, her voice levelling back out as she calmly started to eat again. “I was only saying.”
“Yeah, well.” I decided to let it go.