Disclaimer: I don’t own the characters here. Wish I did, cause I’d love to have Spike and Angel all to myself…Anyway, where was I? Oh, yeah. I own nothing, it’s all borrowed, so please don’t sue me.

Author’s note: Just a short little fic about what I think may have happened if Spike and Angel were to meet again in light of Buffy’s untimely demise.

Common Ground

He walked slowly through the darkened cemetery. He hadn’t been there when they had buried her. The service had been in the afternoon, on a bright, sunny spring day. Not exactly his time of day. Not that he wouldn’t have risked it. For her, he would have. But he had been a week too late.

When Willow had come to him and told him what had happened, he was numb with shock and grief. Everyone had been trying to get a hold of him since it happened, but he had been out of town, so to speak. Out of the world, actually. Needless to say, it wasn’t the welcome home present he hoped for.

He had learned the bare facts of what went on, but mostly, he and Willow just cried. Cordelia had been horrified, too numb to even speak. She had stood there silently with tears running down her face. When she finally spoke, her words echoed what everyone else had been feeling.

“But, Buffy always came out on top…She always won…I just can’t believe she’s actually gone.” She said sadly.

Angel knew they had never really been close, but they had gone through an enormous amount together, and whether Cordy would admit it or not, she considered Buffy to be her friend.

Wesley had stood there completely composed, not uttering a word. Angel had been irritated at his lack of emotion, but later, when Wesley thought no one was around Angel had heard him weeping softly. Angel knew Wes hadn’t had much time to know Buffy, but she was in all their hearts.

Angel had come back to Sunnydale with Willow. The others had stayed behind, left with their own thoughts. The drive there had been almost completely silent. Angel remembered the girl he had loved so much, and knew he would love her forever. Willow, just left him alone with his memories.

When they had arrived she told him where Buffy was buried, and he set off alone to her gravesite. He wished he could have seen her one last time, just to tell her that he never stopped loving her. He wanted to think that she knew that, but in retrospect, he feared that she died not fully understanding that.

He walked up and noticed that someone else was standing beside the grave. The closer he got, the more he felt his anger building inside him. He recognized the platinum hair shining in the moonlight. He broke into a run and quickly descended on Spike. Spike turned around just as Angel tackled him to the ground.

“What the hell are you doing here? Huh? Did you come here to spit on her grave?” Angel shouted at him bitterly, as he shook Spike violently.

“Get off of me, you bloody wanker!” Spike shouted as he punched Angel in the face and kicked him off.

Spike rose to his feet, ready to fight, and Angel did the same. They stood there squared off, sizing each other up.

“Spike, what are you doing here? You have no business being here.” Angel said, with calm fury.

“What’s it look like I’m doing here, Mate? I’m mourning, same as you.” He said angrily.

“Mourning? What? Sad that you didn’t get to do the job yourself?” Angel spat at him.

Spike lunged forward and punched Angel hard.

“You have no idea what she meant to me.” Spike hissed angrily, as he continued throwing punches.

The words that Angel had spoken had cut him to the core. He had always thought he would be dancing on Buffy’s grave, but when the time had come, he had been weeping on it instead. He supposed Angel obviously hadn’t the slightest clue what had been going on in Sunnydale. No clue about him, or the way he felt for Buffy.

“What she meant to you?” Angel asked as he blocked the punches. “I know what she meant to you. She was the Slayer that got away. The one you just couldn’t beat. Now you’re here to get the last laugh, right?”

Spike stopped punching him and dropped his hands to his sides. Angel took the opportunity to take a swing and knocked Spike to the ground. Spike lay there, motionless.

Angel approached him cautiously and stared down at him with contempt. Then he noticed the strangest thing on the other vampires face. Tears. He observed him curiously.

“What? Did that hurt? You’re crying? That’s a new one.” Angel mocked him.

“Piss off! I’m bloody crying because I loved her, you stupid fool! I loved her!” Spike shouted at him, as he jumped to his feet again.

“What? You loved her?” Angel laughed at him contemptuously. “You don’t even know what love is, Spike. Loved her?…That’s really pathetic.”

“I do know what love is, and I loved her. I knew it, and she bloody well knew it too.” Spike said calmly, wishing Angel would just disappear back to wherever he came from. The last thing he needed or wanted was to explain his feelings to him.

“Buffy knew? I bet that was a good laugh.” Angel said, still disbelieving.

“Yeah, she knew. Not that it’s any business of yours. We had something, Angel. Tough as it is for you to comprehend. We respected each other, she trusted me. I helped her…You wouldn’t understand.” Spike said turning away from him.

“You helped her?”

“Didn’t you and Buffy ever talk?” Spike asked him incredulously.

“Not about you.” Angel said flatly.

Spike ignored him, and continued.

“I’ve been helping her, and her friends. Long time now. Guess you never heard about the little present the government put in my head.”

“What the hell are you talking about, Spike? Cause I’m getting bored.”

“I have chip in my head, it stops me from hurting humans. I can’t hurt, I can’t kill. I’ve been defanged.” Spike said with an angry laugh.

“What? Chip? You mean, you can’t kill anyone?”

“No, I haven’t been able to for two years or so. That’s when all this started. First, I helped out of boredom, you know? And they paid me, which was an incentive. But then, well, I started doing it for her…I did it all for her.” He added quietly.

Angel just stood there, not sure if he should believe him or not. Spike was far from trustworthy. Angel studied him carefully before speaking.

“Let me get this straight. You and Buffy…worked together? Willingly? She didn’t kill you?” Angel asked, dumbfounded.

“That’s right. Partners, or something like that.” Spike muttered. Then looked up at Angel with a grin. “Hell, it was more than that. She trusted me with the most important thing in her life, you know? She personally asked me to take care of Dawn until the end of the world. Wonder why she didn’t ask you?” He said, knowing he was hitting Angel right where it hurt.

“You’re lying. She’d never let you anywhere near her sister.” Angel shook his head in denial.

“Ask anyone. Me and the little Nibblet are thick as thieves. Buffy wanted it that way.”

Angel stood there contemplating what Spike was saying. His hatred for him was still clouding his thoughts. The image of Buffy trusting Spike at all, much less with her sister, made little sense.

“I’m surprised Will didn’t fill you in. Figured she would have said something.” Spike continued to speak.

“We didn’t talk much, except about Buffy.” He said softly looking down at the ground. Then he fixed his gaze on Spike again. “Will? Since when do you call her ‘Will’?”

“I don’t know. It’s her name isn’t it?” Spike shrugged, as he fished out a cigarette and lit it, inhaling deeply.

“But that’s what her friends call her. Since when…”

Spike cut him off.

“We are friends.” Spike said sharply, then he smirked. “Face it, my friend, you were replaced as the token vampire sidekick a long time ago.”

Angel wanted to hit him again, but he refrained.

“I was not a ‘token vampire sidekick’.” He said defensively.

“Whatever you say.” Spike mocked him.

“Look Spike, even if what you say is true, which I doubt, you still don’t belong out here, at her grave…” Angel said irritated by the whole confrontation.

“I belong out here as much as you do. Maybe even more. I stuck by her, until the bitter end, as it turns out. I loved her more than anything in this godforsaken world…I loved her more than you did. Least I didn’t run away from her when things got a little ugly.” Spike told him, trying to twist the knife a little harder into Angels gut.

Angel hauled off and punched Spike once more, but Spike only laughed as he held his hand to his face.

“Who’s pathetic, now? You’re only mad because you know it’s true. You never were man enough to stick around and fight for her. You just sulked off to coddle your poor tortured soul. Meanwhile, I had to try and clean up the mess you made of her heart.” Spike added, knowing that the last part wasn’t entirely true, but pissing Angel off was always a treat.

“Shut up! Buffy never, never would have let you anywhere near her or her heart. She hated you just as much as I do. If she didn’t kill you, it was only because she felt sorry for you.”

“If that makes you feel better to think that, then fine.” Spike smirked.

Angel watched as Spike chuckled to himself and took a drag on his cigarette. It was hard to fight the urge to just kill him right then and there. Angel wanted so badly to believe that everything Spike said was a lie, but deep down, he knew better than that. Obviously there was a lot about Buffy he didn’t know.

“So are you trying to say that you and Buffy were…” Angel asked, not able to form the words.

“A couple?” Spike offered.

“You weren’t, were you?” Angel asked, cringing inwardly.

Spike stood there enjoying Angel’s torment, but finally sighed and shook his head.

“No, we weren’t.” He said, and Angel let out a sigh of relief. “But that doesn’t mean we didn’t have something. We did. That last night she was here…We connected. And before you go on saying it was all in my head, or I’m lyin’, it’s true. That was when she told me how much she was countin’ on me. She needed me to keep Dawn safe. Just that once, she looked at me like I was a person, not just some creature…” Spike trailed off remembering their last conversation and wishing he had said so much more than he had.

Angel heard the sadness in Spike’s voice and couldn’t help but believe what he was saying. Strange as all this was, he was starting to believe it.

“Spike…” Angel said, but then stopped. He wasn’t sure what he wanted to say, but felt the need to say something.

“Save it.” Spike said holding up his hand.

“No. Look, if Buffy really trusted you, she must have had good reason, even if I don’t understand.” He finally said, softening a bit.

“It’s not like I’d expect you to understand. Things were complicated, I admit. But they were getting better. If she hadn’t of…well, who knows what would have happened.” He said sadly.

“You really loved her?” Angel asked, trying to let the information sink in, that a vampire without a soul like Spike, could care at all about anyone. Much less Buffy, who was the Slayer. It didn’t make any sense to Angel. The last time he saw Spike, Spike was torturing him and taunting him about Buffy. Now, he was sitting here saying that he loved her.

“Yeah, I really loved her. You met her didn’t you? How could I not love her?” Spike said quietly.

“But you don’t even have a soul, Spike. What could you possibly know about love? You’re a demon.” Angel said, still not comprehending.

“Yeah, and so are you. Didn’t stop you, did it?” Spike scoffed at him. “Besides, I don’t need some tortured soul like you to know what love is. I never lost that, Angel. I spent 120 years devoted to Drusilla because I loved her. Do you think I stayed with her for so long because of the conversation? She was a friggin’ loony thanks to you. But it didn’t matter cause I loved her. So go on, tell me I don’t know what love is.” Spike said sarcastically.

Angel thought for a moment about his words. There was some truth in them. As Angelus, he had lost that love. Completely rejected it. It made him feel too human and that was something Angelus despised. Spike was always different. Weaker, Angelus had always thought. But maybe that was because he hadn’t let go of the love. He hadn’t let the demon destroy that part of himself entirely. Angel realized now that it had actually made Spike stronger instead of weaker.

“Okay. So you loved Drusilla, but that was different. She’s like you. She’s not human. Buffy was…” Angel started.

“Buffy wasn’t just some ‘human’, Angel. She was special. You think I wanted to give a damn about her? No! I wanted her dead. Tried quite a lot too, but I never succeeded. And you know why I didn’t? Because I knew if I did, I’d never see her again. So, somewhere down that line, I realized that it wasn’t her death I was so fascinated with, it was her. She crawled inside me until there was nothing left. You must know how that feels?” Spike tried to explain to him.

“I do.” He said to him softly. He didn’t understand any of this, but Spike’s words were so honest that he had no choice but to believe that something had changed within him. Something that Angel couldn’t grasp, and he suspected that Spike couldn’t either.

“She destroyed everything that I thought was me and turned me into something I can’t even recognize anymore, Angel. She made me care about things I never even thought about before. She didn’t even know she was doing it. Course, this little piece of machinery in my head pushed me along, but she was the one who made me want to change.” Spike explained. He was working everything out in his own mind as well as trying to get Angel to understand.

“Spike, I don’t even know what to say to you. None of this makes sense to me. I seem to remember you telling me that we don’t change, demons don’t change.” Angel told him skeptically.

Spike laughed bitterly.

“Look’s like I was wrong, wasn’t I mate?”

Angel watched as Spike moved past him and knelt down to Buffy’s grave once more. He was confused by Spike’s words, but more by his actions than anything else. This was a vampire that he thought he knew very well. The notion that he could have changed this much was startling to say the least. It made Angel question himself.

Even with his soul intact, he still struggled with wrong and right on a daily basis. And he had slipped up badly in the recent past. Locking those lawyers up to let them die had been something he wasn’t proud of. He had told himself that everyone makes mistakes, but if you want to turn yourself around you can. He had done that. He had realized his errors and was trying to make up for them.

But could Spike do the same? Were his changes even genuine? Angel sensed that they were, no matter how inexplicable it was.

Angel watched as Spike reached out and touched the cold marble. He felt his anger softening and being replaced by sympathy. He walked over to where Spike was crouching and laid his hand on his shoulder cautiously. It was a small gesture, but one that conveyed a world of understanding.

Spike looked up at him and the moonlight caught the faintest glimmer of tears in his eyes.

“She really was something special, wasn’t she?” Angel said to him, as he removed his hand and crouched down beside him, taking in the sight of the marker for the first time.

“There’ll never be another like her.” Spike smiled faintly.

They both sat there together, lost in their own thoughts. Both realizing that they were not enemies in this. They both lost someone they loved. Hard as it was for Angel to grasp, he believed what Spike felt was true.

Finally after several minutes, Spike wiped his silent tears away and began to laugh quietly.

“What’s so funny?” Angel said, wondering for a moment if this whole thing with Spike had been some sort of twisted joke, that he had fallen for.

“Us, Angel. Look at us. We used to be the toughest, the most heartless, evil creatures to ever walk this earth. We killed thousands and enjoyed every minute of it. Now here we are, both reduced to tears over the death of one person. A Slayer, no less. Who woulda’ thought?” Spike said, thoughtfully.

Angel listened to what he said and had to admit that times sure had changed. Of course, he had gotten a soul, and Spike hadn’t. That still perplexed him, but obviously Spike had changed somehow. That much was obvious.

“It is kinda strange, isn’t it? But that’s Buffy for you. She just had this way about her…She didn’t even know it.” Angel said, shaking his head, remembering her beauty and her life.

They sat in silence once more. Spike finally rose to his feet and brushed himself off. He started to say something, then stopped himself. He wasn’t sure if he should say it or not. Finally he just shrugged.

“So, you wanna get a beer or somethin’?” He asked awkwardly.

“Together?” Angel asked incredulously.

“Well, that’s the idea. I just thought that maybe….” Spike started to explain himself, then stopped. “Never mind, forget it. It was a ridiculous suggestion. See ya around, mate.”

Spike started to walk away abruptly when Angel rose to his feet and called after him.

“Wait. Spike, look. I don’t know what’s been going on with you the last two years, but whatever it is…Well, it’s a good thing. I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but, I guess everyone deserves a second chance. Even you.” Angel said sincerely.

Spike wanted to say something snarky, like he always did, but held back. Instead he smiled and nodded his head.

“Thanks.” He said quietly.

“So do you want to get that beer or not?” Angel asked, trying to be lighthearted.

Spike and Angel stood there for a moment just staring at each other. Their pasts were intertwined and now as much as they may have hated it, they were still bound together. This time, out of love for the same woman. A woman that neither man ever had a future with.

Angel had had Buffy for a time. He loved her and she had loved him. Spike was insanely jealous by that fact. What he didn’t realize was that Angel was jealous of him too. Spike had been with Buffy all this time. He had been there when she took her last breath. Had spoken to her, only moments before. Angel never had that chance.

Finally, they ceased their stare down and Spike shrugged his shoulders signifying that the invitation was still open. They walked together out of the cemetery, both of their hearts heavy. She was on both their minds and in both their hearts. Both vampires knew they’d never be the same.

“Know what I loved most about her?” Spike finally spoke up as they walked.

“What’s that?” Angel asked cautiously, not sure he wanted to know.

“She made me feel alive again…” Spike said softly.

Angel thought for a moment and nodded his head in agreement.

“Me too…” He said quietly.

And with that, they both continued to walk on into the night.

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