Keeping Faith

Parts 21-30

by MrsNickB

Disclaimer: The characters and situations of the TV program "Big Valley" are the creations of Four Star/Republic Pictures and have been used without permission. No copyright infringement is intended by the author. The ideas expressed in this story are copyrighted to the author.

Part 21

Jarrod awoke with a searing pain in his right shoulder and the jostling of the wagon did little to relieve it. The sky above was bright with stars and he could smell the slightest aroma of wild flowers kissed with evening dew. He turned on his side to try to get comfortable and witnessed his brother Nick holding his wife in his arms. They were sharing a wagon ride into Stockton.

"Nick?" Jarrod spoke, hardly above a whisper. "Is she alright?" But Nick didn't answer as he continued to gently stroke her bruised face with his hand. The wagon stopped in front of the doctor's office. Heath dismounted Charger and took Laura from Nick's arms so that he could alight from the wagon.

"Easy now, go easy." Nick ordered as he handed her to Heath. Jarrod sat up and Heath nodded to him.

"I'll be right back for you, Jarrod." Heath promised.

"I can manage," he stubbornly answered, pushing himself out of the wagon with great difficulty. Jarrod watched as Heath handed the stilled Laura Barkley back into Nick's arms. He carried his wife into the doctor's office. Jarrod touched Heath's shoulder. "How is she, Heath?"

"Don't rightly know. She's pretty bad off. Come on let me help you inside. We best tend to that gunshot wound."

* * * * * * * *

The lady doctor instructed Nick to bring his wife into the examination room then quickly shooed him out.

"I want to stay with her." Nick pleaded.

"No, I'm sorry, please. I'll call you in when I am finished examining her." She pushed Nick out the door and motioned for Jarrod to come in. "Please, Mr. Barkley, won't you come in so I can tend to your wound."

"Take care of Laura first," Jarrod insisted as he slowly walked into the examination room.

"Please don't tell me how to do my job. Sit down, please." Agatha directed him to a chair, then she went quickly about her work washing and dressing his wound. "You're very lucky, Mr. Barkley, the bullet only took a piece of your bone. Are you right handed?"

"Yes, why?"

"You won't be doing much writing with that hand or much of anything else I suspect. Easy now, this is going to sting." She poured alcohol onto his opened wound. Jarrod's face showed pain but he wouldn't cry out. She wiped off the excess alcohol, stitched the wound and began to bandage it. "You'll be wearing a sling for a while."

"What about my sister-in-law? How bad is she? I need to know." Jarrod felt a swell of guilt as he looked over at Laura.

"I'll know better when I've examined her." She quickly and efficiently wrapped his wound, then tied a sling around his neck to support the arm. "Now, I suggest you go home and rest. I will look in on you in a few days."

"Please don't concern yourself about me. Take care of Laura."

"You blame yourself don't you?" Agatha said as she put away the items she used on him.

"Of course I do. I was responsible for her safety and I let my family down." Agatha sighed at Jarrod's admission.

"You're the oldest and you feel the need to take on your family's problems don't you, Mr. Barkley? Whether they want you to or not. You know you suffer from the eldest child of a widowed mother syndrome? A typical case study," the doctor said in a matter-of-fact tone. "How long has your father been gone? Don't you think it's time you cured yourself of the habit?"

"I beg your pardon! A case study? Me? I happen to be the head of my family. A responsibility which I do not take lightly! You know, you're a very impertinent woman! Now, I'm going to remove myself before I say something I will regret!" Jarrod left the examination room in a huff.

Agatha rolled her eyes and sighed. "Mother was right when she said men don't like intelligent women Agatha Marie." Then Agatha went immediately to work on caring for her other patient.

* * * * * * * *

A few hours later the front door to the doctor's office rang an open warning as Hope whirled in and rushed to her husband.

"Heath!"

"Hope, what are you doing here?" Heath wrapped her in his arms and gave her a kiss on the forehead.

"Jarrod told us what happened when he came home. How bad is she?"

"We don't know. The doctor's been in there for a while." Hope noticed Nick wearing out the floor with his pacing. She immediately moved toward him. Nick stopped his pacing long enough to accept a comforting hug from Hope.

"You really shouldn't have come out. It's late."

"I had Ciego bring me. I couldn't sleep knowing you and Laura needed me." Nick hugged Hope again.

"You're a sweetheart, you know that?" Hope smiled at Nick then led him to a sofa in the room. "Sit down. You need to rest."

"I can't rest as long as.... Hope, you should have seen what they did to her! They had her chained like a dog! She's got bruises everywhere! If they weren't dead, I'd like to kill them both all over again!" She sat next to him and held his calloused hand in hers.

"Easy, Nick, I'm sure the doctor is doing the best she can. Jarrod told us that it was the assistant attorney general and Simon Landelle?"

"Yes, and I hope they're both rotting in hell!"

Heath stepped up to them. "Hope, let me take you home."

"No Darling, not until I know how my cousin is faring." Hope gave Nick's shoulder a squeeze. "You know, she's part Dougherty, Nick, and there's no Irisher tougher."

"Yeah, Laura can sure be tough when she wants to be, that's a fact," he agreed, sharing a tired smile.

The doctor exited the examination room. "Hope, I thought I heard your voice."

Nick immediately jumped to his feet. "How is she? When can I see her? What's going on? You've been in there a long time!"

"Please, Mr. Barkley, a little more patience. Hope I could really use your help in there. Do you mind? I know you're a good nurse."

"What about me? I can go in and can help. Just tell me what to do. I'll do anything!"
Nick begged.

"I'm sorry, Mr. Barkley, I only need Hope. I'll try not to let it take much longer, I promise."

Hope joined the doctor's side. "Easy, Nick. Heath, maybe you could take Nick someplace for coffee?" Hope suggested.

"No, I'm not leaving here until I know if my Laura's alright." Nick insisted.

"In that case, I will let you know as soon as I can, Nick, I promise." Hope followed the doctor into the back room.

Nick raked his large fingers through his dark locks and began pacing again. "I can't stand this waiting! Seems like she's been in there forever!"

* * * * * * * *

Hope was aghast at seeing her cousin in the hospital bed. "Now I understand why you didn't want my brother-in law to come in."

"I've been washing and tending her wounds for the better part of an hour. I really don't know what else I can do for her now."

"What do you mean?"

"Her lungs are filled with fluid which is why she is having great difficulty breathing. She is chilled from influenza yet she has a high fever. I am only grateful she hasn't had a seizure. I am at a loss as to what to do for her other than to make her as comfortable as possible."

"You're saying she's going to die." Hope said it as a statement rather than a question.

"Hope, speaking professionally, she shouldn't be alive now, and yet she is."

Hope rolled up her sleeves. "You have her propped up to help her breathing?"

"Yes, and I've been placing cold compresses on her head, but it still hasn't brought the fever down and she is still chilled."

"Well, we can start a fire and warm the blankets for her body and get more ice for her head."

"Yes, I have been chipping the ice I have in my ice box, but I fear it may not be enough."

"The men can get more. It will give Nick something to do. He's a wreck right now."

"I think it's time I spoke to him."

* * * * * * * *

Doctor Agatha James had a doleful look when she finally entered the waiting room again. Her entrance caused Nick to stop his anxious pacing. Heath stood erect from leaning quietly against the window pane. The doctor cleared her throat before she spoke. She looked directly into Nick's pained eyes.

"I won't lie to you, Mister Barkley. Your wife is in bad shape. Her lungs are filled with fluid and her pneumonia has worsened. Other than her ankle she hasn't any other broken bones."

"Tell me, is she gonna make it?" Nick blurted out.

"She's in a very weakened state. She is dehydrated and malnourished. Every breath she takes is exceedingly difficult for her, because of the pneumonia. It's making her heart work all the harder for it."

"That's not answering my question." Nick persisted.

Agatha bowed her head and took in a deep breath. "I'm sorry, there's nothing more I can do."

"No, you're wrong. I don't believe that!" Nick pushed his way past the doctor and into the examination room.

Laura was lying on a bed, unconscious. Her face was badly bruised and she had two swollen black eyes that made them impossible to open. Nick took her hand in his and gently brought it to his lips for a kiss. Hope had placed another cold compress on her head, then moved away to afford him some privacy. The doctor quickly rushed into the examination room fearing that the distraught man would injure her patient further with his anxiety. She was taken aback by the way he gently held her hand and spoke in hushed tones.

"You can forget about leaving me, Milady, now you know that's not gonna happen. You made me a promise and I'm holding you to it. Remember, you promised me that we would grow old together and your face would be the last I would see. Now, this is not keeping that promise so you best forget about dying, ya hear, 'cause I ain't letting you go. Ya hear me woman, I'm not letting you go!" He bowed his head down and let his flowing tears touch the limp hand he held. The doctor backed out of the room and closed the door behind her. Hope walked near him and stroked Nick's head with her hand.

"She's a strong woman. Hold onto that thought."

Hope left the room to join the doctor. Agatha was in the middle of a conversation with Heath.

"If you could convince the owner of the icehouse to open up this evening that would be a great help. I need to get her fever down."

"Not a problem. Is there anything else I could do?" Heath asked.

"Yes, I need more wood for the fireplace to keep the blankets warm," Agatha sat at her desk. It was covered in medical magazines. She hadn't been able to sleep earlier so she had been sitting at her desk reading the medical journals when Laura Barkley was brought in. She looked up at Hope. "You know, everyday I look through these journals, always searching for some miracle cure, some new test, a new instrument, anything to make me a better doctor, and now, when I need something to save that woman, there are no answers."

"There's prayer." Hope answered.

"I envy you your faith, Hope. I truly do; but me, I've always put my faith in science, and now even that has let me down."

"No, science is a tool, a gift from God. Just as we are gifts to each other. I have faith that the Good Lord will help you find a way if it is meant to be." Hope sat down on the sofa, pulled out her rosary beads from her skirt pocket and began to finger them, praying in the Latin language she was taught as a child.

* * * * * * * *

Nick's tear-stained face had dried while he sat clutching his wife's hand. "Do you know how very proud I am of you? I know, I never tell you, hell, I've never even shown any interest in anything that was important to you. I don't know why you put up with me. But I am proud of you. I'm proud of the way you started the Stockton Library and I'm proud of the way you taught so many to read. You know, I never told you this, but every month when me and Heath gave out the pays, well, lots of the men couldn't write their own names, so they would make a mark on the payroll book; but you know, after a time a lot of them were signing their names, said they learned how from the literacy school you started in the Stockton Library. You make a man proud, Laura Barkley, you make me proud to be your husband. You're one special lady and when this is all over, and you're well, I'm gonna spend the rest of my days letting you know just how special you are, and that's a promise, Milady."

Part 22

The new day found no change in her very ill patient as Doctor Agatha James looked down at Laura, then at Nick, who hadn't ventured to leave his wife's side throughout the long night. Her eyes brimmed at the tragedy of the family before her. She had been honest with him, even though it was against her own will that she should be. I’m sorry; there is nothing more I can do. She briefly wondered where Hope was. The younger woman loved her cousin dearly, and had been there earlier in the morning, but rushed out with little explanation. Agatha heard the door of the outer office open. A moment later, the door to Laura’s room opened and Hope peeked her head in. Nick didn’t move. She walked in, and motioned to one behind her. Padre Sanchez followed her in.

“Nick?” Hope called softly.

He looked up, dazed, then rose. “What’s he doing here, Hope?”

“I brought Padre Sanchez with me. I thought, if you don’t object, he could give her Extreme Unction-- the Last Rites.”

“What?” Nick was growing angry now. “Last Rites? She’s not going to die!”

“Pèrdon, señor, but she may.”

“You stay out of this, Padre,” Nick growled. “Laura is not going to die. She’s survived worse, and she’ll do it again. I don’t know where you think you get off bringing a priest in here, Hope Barkley, but Laura and me are just fine without that. She’ll be fine.”

“I don’t want her to die any more that you do, Nicholas Barkley. Do you honestly believe I would want that? Do you honestly think I would ever wish harm on Laura? Or want something which was not good for her?”

Nick sighed, and looked lovingly at his ill wife, tiny on the bed. “I’m not sure you’d wish harm on anyone, Tidbit. But, it’s like it’s giving up on her. I- I just can’t do that. Not now, not ever.”

“Señor, it is not, ah, giving up on your esposa (wife) to give this for her. Señora Esperanza (Mrs. Hope) has had this twice before, she has told me. It is not giving up; it is giving the person up to God, Who alone knows the hour of death for His creation,” the priest attempted to explain.

Hope spoke again. “In the Catholic Church, this is a sacrament, a gift to us to help us become holy and Godlike. It is to reconcile us with God, so that should we meet Him then, we may join Him for eternity. It is an act of faith and trust in God; I’m not giving up on her, either, Nick.”

“I don’t know. It seems dishonest. Laura and me, well, we’re not Catholic.”

“Laura is. She fell away from the faith because of grief over her mother’s death, but that does not change who she is. She was mistaken in that, as a child may often be in such sadness. But she is a woman now, and one who may not be with us long. Let her have this, Nick. Please.”

“Señor Barkley, we did not come to force this on you, and if you wish, I shall leave. Many see this as a comfort. An assurance that whatever end she meet she will be with God. In Español, we say ‘Via con Dios,’ -- Go with God. This is like, I think, in Inglès, Godspeed. Even Christ trusted Himself to God. With this, Señora Esperanza wants to trust Señora Laura to the Lord.”

“Well,” Nick thought out loud, “I need to think a little.”

“We can wait outside if you wish,” Hope offered.

“No, that’s alright. I, I don’t mind saying I’m really worried. I don’t know what to do without her. I’m not the best churchgoer, Padre, but I’ve seen God’s hand in plenty enough to know He’s there.” He sighed. “You can go ahead and do it, Padre, if Agatha thinks it’s okay. I guess I could use some piece of mind, too.”

“Thank you, Nick.” Hope smiled, gently.

“I don’t see why it wouldn’t be alright,” Agatha spoke up, having observed the heartfelt conversation quietly near Laura’s bedside. “I’ve seen it before, and it won’t cause her any harm.”

“Alright, then. Don’t thank me, Tidbit. I’m allowing it as much for you as for her. There’s got to be some good in it, if you like it so much. But I want to know what’s happening the whole time.”

“I’ll explain and translate for you, Nick.”

“He’s going to do it in Spanish?” Nick questioned, incredulously.

“No, Latin. All the sacred rites are in Latin; it is the language of our faith. It’s strange, I know, but it is also very beautiful, because in all parts of the world we speak the same language of prayer. I am familiar with it, enough that I can translate for you.”

“Alright, then. Go ahead, Padre.”

“Gracias, Señor. This is not a thing to regret to do.” Padre Sanchez took his black travel bag from off his shoulder and placed it on a table nearby. Then he pulled out his stole, a cloth similar in design to a thin scarf, which was vibrant in color, probably woven by the Indians of his mission, and hung it from his neck, creating two bright stripes against his black cassock. He also took out a small, worn leather prayer book, and finally a small phial of sacred oil. He walked over to Laura and began the centuries-old rite with the sign of the cross. Nick stood at the end of her bed, with Hope beside him, and grew aware slowly of a mystical deepness in the room he could neither understand nor name.

Realizing he wasn’t paying attention, he shook his head and refocused. Hope whispered the words softly in English with her head turned up towards his ear as he watched with clenched hands.

“Per istam sanctam unctionem et suam pissimam misericordia--”

“Through this holy unction and the goodness of His mercy--”

“indulgeat tibi Dominus quidquid--”

“may God pardon you whatever--”

“per visum--” He anointed her eyes with oil.

“by sight--”

“per auditionem--” He touched the oil to her ears.

“by hearing--”

“per odoratum--” He blessed her nose.

“by smelling--”

“per palatum--” He made a cross with oil on her lips.

“by taste--”

“per tactionem--” He anointed one palm, and the other.

“by touch--”

“per incessumque--” he blessed her feet.

“and by walking--”

“deliquisti.”

“you have sinned.”

“Amen.” Padre Sanchez placed his hand on Laura’s head and bowed his own in prayer. He silently marked a cross of oil upon her forehead, then withdrew from her bedside.

Nick stepped to him and held out his hand. “Thank you, Padre. I still don’t really know what that’s supposed to do for Laura, but it made me feel better about it.”

The priest shook his hand, his thumb still wet with the sacred oil, and gave a small but genuine smile. “I do it as much for you as for her, Señor. I will go back to the mission now. I pray for your esposa.”

“I appreciate it,” Nick said softly, his heart still held by the mysticism of the past few moments. The priest left silently.

“Well,” Agatha said after a moment, “I’m not Catholic, but I always find that strangely calming.”

“I am glad of that, then,” said Hope. “Do you mind if I stay, Nick? I can understand if you wish to be alone, of course.”

Nick put his arm around her shoulders in a brotherly hug. “Well, Tidbit, if you’ve got that brother of mine roped into watching those paired rapscallions of yours, who am I to make it easy on him by sending you back?” he teased, but continued on a more serious tone, “Of course you can stay. I haven’t been able to tell you ‘No,’ in a few years now.”

She smiled sadly. “Thank you, Nick. I’ll just pull out m’beads and get to it.”

“Whatever you want.”

She started silently with the sign of the cross and began to move her fingers over the beads as she started the Lord’s Prayer. Nick looked over at her kneeling beside his wife’s bed from where he had again seated himself, then looked at Laura, then heavenwards, then back to Hope. “Would you mind, would you mind saying that out loud?”

Hope looked up and studied him for a brief moment. “Not if you don’t mind that I’m saying it in Latin.”

“You just say it however you want to, Tidbit.” Agatha looked on as Hope said the words in the beautiful and oft-forgotten tongue, and raised her own eyes to the unseen sky, as both she and Nick yoked their hearts to the ancient prayers rising like incense to God.

* * * * * * * *

Agatha had fallen asleep reading her medical journals when the bell on the office door pulled her out of her slumber. Heath smiled a greeting.

"Hey doc, didn't mean to wake ya."

"I'm glad you did." A tea kettle on the stove was filling the room with hot vapors.

"That kettle's gonna burn iffn ya don't take it off there, Ma'am."

"Oh! I forgot. I was making tea for Hope and myself." She moved toward the stove and grabbed a towel. She was about to pull the kettle off the stove when she stopped, dropped the towel on the floor and rushed to her desk. She began looking through a pile of medical magazines, forgetting the boiling tea kettle.

"Ah, ma'am? Agatha?" Heath said, then he moved toward the stove, grabbed the towel she had dropped and pulled the tea kettle off the stove. "Is everything alright?"

The lady doctor looked up from rifling through the magazines on her desk. "Do you know anyone who's handy with a hammer and saw?"

"Well, I do alright with 'em, if ya need something done."

Agatha came from behind her desk. She held a magazine rolled open to a particular page. "Can you build me this?"

"Well, I could if you told me the dimensions you want. This here is all in French."

"Yes I know, but I could translate them for you. I'm afraid I can't draw a whit but I'll do my best to draw you a blueprint."

"Oh, that's not a problem, you can have Hope do that. She a wonder with a pencil and paper."

"I have found your wife to be invaluable to me already. Is there anything your Hope can't do?"

"She's really bad at roping a calf, but I think I can teach her in time." Heath joked.

Hope exited the examination room. "Sweetheart, you're here."

"I was hoping to talk Nick into coming home to get some rest and something to eat."

"It's worth a try. I'll call him out."

"Hope, before you go, could you do me a favor. This is really important."

Agatha showed them the drawing in the magazine and explained exactly what she wanted. Once the doctor gave Hope a blank piece of paper she immediately went to work, meanwhile, Heath joined Nick in the other room.

* * * * * * * *

"Nick? How's she doing?"

"No change." Nick answered sullenly. Heath stood by Nick and placed his hand on his shoulder.

"She's looking better, the swelling has gone down some."

"She still has a fever." Nick absentmindedly rubbed the palm of Laura's hand with his thumb and placed the other on her forehead.

"Ya know, Agatha thinks she might have an idea about how to bring her fever down. She showed me this contraption she wants me to make. It's called a steam tent. I figured maybe you can come home with me and help me build it. Two's better than one ya know."

"Does she think it'll work?" Nick looked hopefully into Heath's eyes for the first time.

"It's worth a try."

"Still, I don't want to leave her. I want to be here when she wakes up."

"The way I figure it, if we both get started we'll be back here in no time."

"I don't want to leave her alone."

"Hope can sit with her if you want."

"She needs to get back to her babies."

"The babies are at the ranch. Between Mother and Guadalupe, they're getting plenty of attention. Come on, Nick, let's go."

Nick stood up from his chair then bent down to give Laura a kiss on her still swollen lips. "Be back soon, Milady," he whispered.

* * * * * * * *

Hope sat by Laura's side and continued to place cold compresses on her head. Agatha, wearing a leather apron, set about working at her table mixing several bottles of medicines together, then heating the mixture on a small burner. Once she was satisfied that the liquid was readied, she poured the mix onto a cloth.

"Hope, I need you to help me lift her on to her side." Hope did as the doctor instructed. Once the comatose patient was on her side, the doctor placed the warm wet cloth on her bare back. Hope winced at the smell being emitted from the cloth.

"That's a very strange, though somewhat familiar smell."

"It should be. It's camphorated oil, oil of lavender, ammonia and alcohol. The French have used it quite successfully to help dilate the lung tissue, which should help her breathe easier and relieve the stress on her heart." They laid her back down. "And now I'll place another cloth on her chest for good measure. Would you open her nightgown please?"

"Certainly. You know I never thought I would say this, considering recent events, but God bless the French."

"Indeed." Agatha smiled for the first time that day. "It's unfortunate I can't give it to her in a hypodermic needle. The French have had success with that as well, but it would endanger the child," the doctor said absently as she placed another warm cloth to Laura's chest.

"Child? Did you say child?"

"I can't believe I did it again! I only have a few patients and twice now I've violated the doctor/patient confidentiality. I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to let that slip out. That's inexcusable."

"You're overtired Aggie, it's understandable, but how long have you known?"

"I did some tests while Laura was here before. No one knows that she's pregnant. Not even she does, so please don't say anything."

"There are tests now to find out so soon?"

"Yes, a doctor in England developed a pregnancy test. I read about it in one of my medical journals."

"Nick is going to be so pleased. He and Laura have been wanting another child for so long." Hope beamed happily.

"He can't know, not yet. Can you imagine how devastated he would be if he lost both his wife and child?"

"Yes, I see what you mean, but then that's all the more reason that we help the two of them pull through." Hope sent up a silent prayer of thanksgiving.

Part 23

Nick and Heath rode into the Barkley courtyard.

Ciego immediately took the horses from them. "Welcome home, Senor Nick."

"Thanks." The sullen look on Nick's face told Ciego all he needed to know about the senora's condition.

Nick walked into the house. His singularly quiet entrance startled Victoria. "Nick, dear, I'm so glad you're home. Come right in the kitchen. I have some wonderful roast chicken."

"Not really hungry mother, I just came home to..."

"Nonsense, I won't hear of it. You haven't had a decent meal in days. I insist you come and eat," she said with some force in her voice.

Nick sighed. "Fine, I'll eat. But then I'm going to help Heath outside in the barn."

The tired rancher walked into the kitchen. Silas smiled when he saw Nick, but said little other than a greeting. He quickly set a plate in front of Nick. As tired as Nick felt, he was hungrier than he thought and ravenously ate the food before him. Jarrod, entering the kitchen, smiled when he saw Nick eating heartily.

"Can I surmise from your enthusiastic eating that Laura has taken a turn for the better?"

"You can surmise all you like. I'm hungry is all." Nick gave Jarrod a quick glance over his shoulder. "How's the arm?"

"It's alright."

"Aggie wants to see you."

"Why does she want to see me?"

"Get those stitches out. Ya don't expect her to come way out here do ya?"

"No, of course not. I'll go there tomorrow. When I find the time."

"Yeah, you do that. When you find the time." Nick said gruffly.

"Look, Nick, I understand the pressure you're under these days but, well, we'll talk later."

Jarrod was about to leave when Colleen burst into the kitchen and latched onto her uncle's arm. "Come on, Uncle Jarrod, it's your turn to play the game."

"I'll be right there, Colleen. Run along."

"No hugs for your Papa?" Nick gently chided his daughter.

Colleen caught sight of her father's unkempt appearance and her eyes widened with fear. She hid behind her uncle. Nick held out his arms and Jarrod coaxed the child to meet him. Nick held her tightly as he blinked back tears.

"Papa, your face is scratchy," she complained and Nick reluctantly released her.

"I'm sorry sweetie. I didn't get a chance to shave today." The child looked up at her Uncle.

"Can we go play checkers now, Uncle Jarrod?"

"Of course, Princess, you go into the library. I'll be there in a few minutes." Colleen scampered out of the kitchen. Jarrod followed the child out after giving Nick a pitiful smile. Nick shook his head, stood, and brought his dish to the sink.

"Can I get you anything else, Mr. Nick?"

"No thanks, Silas, I'm going upstairs and clean up a bit."

"Mr. Nick, I want yas ta know my church group has Missus Nick in our prayer circle."

Nick placed his hand on the old man's shoulder. "Thanks, Silas, me and Laura really appreciate that." Silas nodded his smile.

* * * * * * * *

Nick was walking down the stairs buttoning the sleeves of a freshly laundered gray shirt when he heard laughter coming from the library. He didn't acknowledge his mother's presence when he saw her sitting in the parlor. She silently smiled, pleased that he had at least taken the time to eat and clean up before he left again. Nick followed the laughter into the library and found his daughter and Jarrod happily playing checkers.

"I cannot believe it, young lady. In a matter of weeks you have managed to master this game." Jarrod's comment evoked giggles from his delighted niece.

"Oh, Uncle Jarrod, you let me win," she tittered. "One more game."

"Now, I think you've beaten me enough for one day. It's time you run along now, I do have some paperwork I need to catch up on."

"Please, Uncle Jarrod." Colleen begged.

"You heard your uncle," Nick interrupted. "Run along now. I want to speak to your uncle."

"But I wanna play more checkers." She pouted her lips to her father.

"Enough. Go upstairs." When the child didn't move Nick placed his fists on his hips and stood firm. "Now, Colleen Victoria, don't make me say it again," he warned. The child rushed past her father with brimming eyes.

Jarrod looked apprehensive as he stood and went to the bar table to pour himself a drink. "Can I get you a drink, Nick?"

"No. I didn't come in here to drink with you. I came to talk."

"So you said." After he poured a drink for himself he faced his brother. "What is it, Nick?"

"You know I don't beat around the bush. When I got something to say I say it."

"I know that well, Nick." Jarrod took a sip of his drink. "So, say what you have to say."

"I'm sorry you lost your woman. I know she meant a lot to you."

"Yes, Nick, she did," he said with a bowed head.

"And I know you haven't had much time to mourn her because of what's happened with Laura."

"I have regretted what has happened to Laura. I feel personally responsible for it," Jarrod said as he turned his back.

"Well, I guess we all could share the blame in that. But that's not what I want to talk about. I don't blame you for what happened to Laura. I want you to know that right off."

"I appreciate that, Nick."

"And, like I said, I am sorry you lost your woman, but I'm tellin' ya here and now, you're not replacing your family with mine."

"What are you talking about?" Jarrod's brows furrowed at his brother's statement.

"I'm talkin' about Colleen, my daughter. She's mine Jarrod. Mine and Laura's, and we're not giving her up to you."

"I never claimed Colleen for myself."

"Haven't you? From where I stand I see different."

"Are you talking about my indulging her with playing some foolish board game? Because if you are.."

"No, I'm not talking about that. I'm talking about what's been happening since I've gotten back. She's very attached to you."

"And I gather you don't like it." Jarrod took a sip from his drink, then placed the glass firmly down on a table. "Well, now, brother Nick, let me tell you what I've had to contend with before you comment further. You were gone for weeks, and we had a break-in at the house. Now, that left the women here nervous, most particularly Colleen. Laura told me Colleen called out your name all night. She didn't understand why you weren't here to protect her."

"I run this ranch, you know it sometimes takes me away." Nick defended himself.

"Yes, of course, I understand that. We all do, but a five year old doesn't understand that. She only knows that her papa wasn't here to protect her," he raised his eyebrows in a mock admonishment.

"Yes, but.."

"Hold on, I'm not finished yet. Later, Laura disappeared. Now, I had a very frightened child on my hands, whose parents, for whatever reason, had abandoned her."

"We did not abandon her!" Nick said gruffly.

"Of course you didn't, but how do you think it looks to a child? I couldn't tell Colleen that her mother was kidnapped. I had to make up some suitable story. Mother and I came up with Laura's aunt in Boston being ill as an explanation." Jarrod raised his hands and paced in front of the fireplace.

"That was a good idea. I suppose I would have done the same." Nick resignly agreed.

"Of course you would've. We all love Colleen and want to protect her. She's the first of a new generation of Barkleys and she's very precious to all of us."

"She's still my child!" Nick said with renewed firmness.

"No one thinks otherwise." Jarrod poured another drink for himself as a sign that he had completed his oration.

"Is that a fact? Well, maybe it's time we clear the air about something. I suspect you do think otherwise Jarrod!" Nick's fists were again planted on his hips.

"Exactly what are you implying here?"

"Oh don't give me that indignant lawyer drivel. I've heard it too many times to give a damn. You know exactly what I'm talking about!"

"Well, Nicholas, why don't you just spit it out?"

"Somewhere in the back of your brain you think Colleen is your child because she has your coloring." Jarrod stared incredulously at his younger brother. "Oh yes, Laura and I have had long talks and even arguments about this. But that's over now. I'm here to claim what's mine. Colleen may have your coloring, but know this, and know this now. She's my flesh, not yours. It's time you get that through your thick head! There can be no doubts about it. Not if you ever want to remain my brother! Do I make myself clear?"

"Are you threatening me?"

"I don't need to threaten anyone. You know that about me. I'm stating a fact. You're not replacing your family with mine. I won't stand for it! You may have imagined, in some stupor you suffered during that earthquake in Frisco over five years ago, that you may have done something you shouldn't have with my wife, but she remembers different, and that's good enough for me; so, if you want to be welcomed in my home you best remember that!" Nick turned to leave the room.

"Are you sure she remembers Nick?" Jarrod regretted the words the second they left his lips.

Nick quickly turned on his brother and punched him with a right hook. The noise of furniture being overturned brought Victoria rushing into the library.

"Nicholas! What have you done?! Your brother has only one good arm! How could you attack him like that?"

Heath walked into the library. When he saw his brother on the floor he immediately rushed to his side, then turned angrily toward Nick. "Ya had to do it, didn't ya, Nick?!

"Yeah, I had to do it! It's over now. Lets get that contraption built."

"It's done! I finished it already."

"Good, let's go! I don't wanna waste anymore time here." Nick spun on his heel and stormed out the door. Heath helped Jarrod off the floor.

"You alright, Jarrod?"

"Yeah, fine. You better go. He's waiting."

"Why don't you come with us? You might have re-injured your shoulder."

"It's fine, just go, I'm fine." Jarrod steadied himself on his feet. He brought his good arm up and wiped the blood from the corner of his mouth. Victoria rushed to her son's side, then Heath left them.

"Come sit on the chair, Jarrod. I hope you'll forgive Nick. He's very overwrought these days."

"There's nothing I need to forgive Nick for. Nothing at all. He's right about me. He's always been right."

"What's going on Jarrod? Why are you two at odds again? I thought that was over long ago. How can this happen again?"

"It is over Mother. I promise you. I'm going back to my own home tonight."

"No Jarrod, you can't. Who's going to look after you?"

"I'll be fine. Cook is there, so I won't be alone." He attempted a reassuring smile.

"I'm going to move in with you for a few days. You need to have that shoulder looked after," Victoria decided.

"You will do no such thing! I won't have you away from little Colleen right now. She needs all the support she can get. I insist, so don't argue with me. I will be fine." Jarrod grabbed her with his good arm and kissed the top of her head, then left his mother alone in the library.

Part 24

Nick and Heath quickly set up the steam tent as per the directions that Hope had drawn

for them. Agatha and Hope were cutting strips of cheesecloth to make the walls of the tent. The top was made of a lightweight wood that looked like a roof. Attached to it was an upside down closed flume. From that was a metal stovepipe which reached over a Bunsen burner. Heath had secured the stovepipe to the wall with wire ties. He stood back to inspect his work.

"Is that what you wanted, Doc?"

"Perfect, Heath. I'm amazed that you made it so quickly. I didn't expect to have it installed until tomorrow."

Nick smiled proudly at his brother. "There's not much my little brother can't do when he puts his mind to it; except beat me in poker."

Heath gave the doctor a lopsided smile and a wink, "Wishful thinkin' on my big brother's part."

"What else can we do?" Nick asked.

"Leave, please. Hope and I are going to be busy for a while."

"But I want to help," Nick pleaded.

"You did, Mr. Barkley. You both did. Now you can help by leaving so I can get to work."

"Ya know, you can call me Nick, " he said, as she forcefully pushed him out of the room.

"Good, and you can call me Doctor," she quipped.

Nick stopped and turned to face the auburn haired woman. "You save my wife, lady, and I will."

They left the room. Heath placed his hand on Nick's shoulder. "Come on, Nick, you owe me a drink."

"How do ya figure?"

"You were supposed to help me with that contraption, but you didn't; so ya owe me a drink."

* * * * * * * *

The two brothers sat at a table in the saloon, each nursing a beer. "So, ya wanna tell me what that was all about?" Heath began, after taking a thoughtful swallow of the frothy liquid.

"What?"

"At home? You and Jarrod?"

"Nothing."

"Ya sailed him clear across the room, Nick."

"Yup, I did." Nick took a long gulp of his beer. "S' pose I owe him an apology for that."

"I guess ya do, especially since he's only got one good arm." Nick rolled his eyes.

"You gonna keep harping on this? 'Cause if you are I got better things to do with my time!"

"He's your brother. Ya can't go having bad blood between you two again." Nick gritted his teeth.

"I know he's my blasted brother! He was mine before he was yours, so shut up about it!"

"Didn't think that ever mattered with you, Nick." Heath took a long swig of his beer. Nick dragged his hand over his chin and shook his head.

"I didn't mean that, Heath. It's just this whole thing with Laura and now Colleen. I just feel like I'm losing them both, and it's scaring the hell outta me."

"Colleen? You mean because she hanging onto Jarrod?"

"Yeah, she never comes to me anymore. She wants Uncle Jarrod to read her stories, play games, tuck her into bed."

"Meanwhile, you're being selfish spending all that time with her very sick mama. And she doesn't understand that, does she? All she knows is that her parents ain't around anymore, so she clings to Uncle Jarrod, cuz, he's there, and you can't be in two places at once."

Nick tugged at his ear. "What am I gonna do, Heath?"

"Maybe it's time for the truth. Colleen should be told about her mother."

"Are you crazy? I can't do that! She'll want to see her mother and I can't let her see Laura in that condition. She's just a kid!"

"That's right. She is. Nick, it's not that Colleen doesn't love you. She does. She's just scared. Let Jarrod be there for you."

"What?! She's my kid!"

"Yeah, she is, and nothing is going to change that, but right now, you can't be there for her, so let him. Did you ever think that maybe Jarrod needs her too?"

"What are you talking about?"

"You talk about losing people you love. Look at Jarrod. You wanna trade places with him? He hasn't even had time to mourn Carol. In spite of what any of us thought of her, Jarrod loved that woman. I've seen Jarrod with your Colleen. That little girl lifts his spirits. He adores her, and when she's around he forgets for awhile that he's hurting."

Nick bent his head down and shook it remorsefully. "What would I do without your clear thinking?"

Heath gave Nick a slanted grin and patted him on the shoulder. "Don't be so hard on yourself, Nick. You'd eventually come around to seeing things clear. In a few years."

"Shut up." The two enjoyed a long overdue laugh and didn't notice the buxom blond that sidled up to their table.

"Nick?"

"Oh hi, Belle." The blonde slid into a chair near him. The smell of liquor was evident on her breath as she wrapped a meaty arm around Nick's shoulder.

"Been a long time since ya came around here, Nick, honey. I heard about Laura. How's she doing these days?" the blonde slurred.

"About the same." Nick pushed his chair back and rubbed his chin. "Well, I best be gettin' back. It was good seein' ya again, Belle." Heath stood at the same time Nick did.

"Going so soon, Nick? I thought we'd have a drink for old time's sake."

"Afraid I can't today." Nick threw a few dollars on the table. "You take care, ya hear? Keep the change."

Belle grabbed hold of his shirt sleeve, "Aw, come on, Nick, for old time's sake. Drink with your Belle, huh?"

"Maybe you should get yourself some coffee, Belle. I think maybe you've had too much to drink. See ya around." Nick gave her a kind smile then turned away. He followed Heath toward the door.

Belle shouted over to him. "Go ahead, honey! You'll come around when wifey kicks the bucket!"

Milt, the bartender, threw his towel down on the bar and shouted angrily, "BELLE! SHUT UP!"

Nick turned on his heel and stalked back to the table. The patrons in the saloon were hushed. Heath grabbed at Nick's arm, but Nick shook him loose.

"Nick!" Heath warned, "Don't!"

Nick curled his fists on the tabletop while his enraged eyes bored into the now cowering dance hall hostess who sat before him. "I'm gonna try to remember we're old friends, Belle, but if you ever talk about my wife like that again, I'm going to forget you're a woman. Milt, you make sure Belle here gets a pot of strong coffee in her!"

"You can count on it, Nick!" The bartender said in a determined tone.

"I.I. I'm sorry, Nick," she stammered to his retreating back.

* * * * * * * *

Nick and Heath were just entering the doctor's office when they heard the sounds of struggling coming from the back room. Nick immediately rushed in without knocking, Heath on his heels. Hope and Agatha were bent over Laura who was mumbling in her delirium. Hope was applying cold compresses to her cousin's head while the doctor was trying to stop her from moving too much and re-injuring herself.

"Laissez-moi seul.., laissez-moi seul.., laissez-moi seul..," The delirious patient called out and flailed her arms, defending herself from an imaginary foe.

Nick stood at the end of the bed and stared anxiously at his wife. "She's awake, that means she going to be all right! Isn't she?! Well? Tell me, damnit!"

"Her fever's gotten worse." The doctor spoke out.

Nick's heart began to pound wildly in his chest. "W.w.whadya mean? You said this contraption was going to help break the fever! You said she would breathe better! What the hell are you doing to her?! Don't let her die! You can't! Oh, my God, don't let her die..!"

The doctor continued to struggle with her patient. "I'm doing the best I can!" she shouted to him. Suddenly, the flailing arms ended their struggle as the patient calmed down and once again became docile. Laura's voice became low as she mumbled incoherently.

"What is she saying?" Nick finally asked.

"It's French. She's saying, 'leave me alone,' " Agatha answered. Hope searched the doctor's face for answers, but the doctor had none to give as she stepped back from the bed.

Nick felt he finally had enough and rushed to the doctor and grabbed her arms, shaking her. "You tell me the truth! I want to know what you've been doing to make her well? Do you even know what the hell you're doing, lady?!" Heath quickly pulled his overwrought brother off the frightened doctor.

The doctor's terror became anger as she tore into the furious man that towered over her. "You want to know the truth? I'll tell you the truth! I've done all I can for her! I don't have any answers! I have worked night and day without sleep, doing the best I can and the last thing I need is for a madman to attack me! Now if you can't help me save your wife and child, then I suggest you get the hell out of my office!" The angry words tumbled out, as the doctor's green eyes flashed with fire. Then Agatha sighed when she realized, once again, she violated her oath of confidentiality.

'Child? Did you say child?" Nick went perfectly still, incredulous. His voice then took on a softness that surprised the doctor. She matched it with her own.

"Yes, she's about two months, but if we don't get her fever down she won't be for long." Agatha sighed, as she attempted to hold back her tears.

"Tell me what I have to do. I'll do anything you ask," Nick said quietly. Hope smiled and took Nick's hand. She led him to her side of the bed.

"Listen to me, Nick. This pan here is full of chipped ice. Now what you need to do is soak the cloth in it and wipe Laura's face to cool her down. I've been taking the smaller ice chips and letting them melt on her lips. We are hoping that will eventually bring the fever down."

"I can do that." Nick's eyes softened as he looked at his sister-in-law. Hope always had a way of calming the volatile cowboy.

She placed a small gentle hand on his stubbly cheek, "I know you can, Nick. I have faith in you, and so does Laura. She always did."

Nick took her tiny hand in his and kissed her opened palm. "Thank you for reminding me, Tidbit."

"You're welcome Nick. Now, I'm going home to my babies." Hope linked her arm in her husband's and left the room.

Heath gently stroked his wife's hand. "I love you, Mrs. Barkley." Then kissed her cheek.

Part 25

Victoria had her hands full with the petulant child as she struggled to get her to sleep.

"I've read you a story, Colleen. It's late and you need your sleep. Now, I've already tucked you in once tonight, and I'm not doing it again, young lady!" Victoria warned.

"I want Uncle Jarrod to tell me a story, not you!" Colleen sat up in her bed with her arms banded over her chest, defying her grandmother's wishes. "I won't go to sleep! I want Uncle Jarrod!"

"I've already told you, Uncle Jarrod is not here, and he will be very disappointed in your behavior."

"I don't care! I want Uncle Jarrod to read to me!" The child's face was in a mutinous scowl.

"Will I do for now?" said a low, gruff voice from the open doorway. The light from the hallway illuminated Nick from behind, making him look like a shadowy dark figure.

"Papa? Is that you?" Colleen sat up expectantly. Nick walked into his child's room with hands behind his back.

"It's me, Colleen, and I've got a surprise for you." Victoria was pleased to finally see her Nick home. She stood up from the child's small bed and glided past her middle son, stopping to place a welcoming kiss on his cheek. She quietly closed the door behind her.

"You have a surprise, Papa? For me?"

"Well, I do if you're my Pixie face. Are you?"

"Yes, Papa, I am!" The child scrambled out of bed and ran into her father's arms. Nick knelt on the floor to receive her. He hugged her tightly, dropping the toy he had in his hands.

"That's good, because I'm your Papa and nothing's ever gonna change that, not ever."

"I missed you, Papa!" She kissed his stubbly cheek now wet with a single tear.

"I know, baby. I've missed you too. It's sure good to be home."

"I love you, Papa."

"I love you too Colleen." They hugged and kissed once again.

"Papa, why are you crying?"

"I'm crying 'cause I'm happy, is all."

"Mama cries when she's happy, too. I miss Mama. Can't we go get her back from that old Boston place?"

Nick picked the child up into his arms and tucked her in bed. "I have a story I need to tell you."

"Oh goody, about Indians?!"

"Not exactly. It's a story about this here doll." When Nick had picked up his daughter, he had retrieved the toy from the floor. It was a china doll dressed in a pink ruffled gown with tea roses adorning it. The hair was a mass of soft yellow waves that went down the doll's back. It's glass eyes were a shining clear blue.

"Oh, Papa! She's the most beautiful doll I've ever seen! What's her name?"

"She doesn't have a name. Maybe you can name her." Colleen's eyes began to fill with tears.

Nick stroked her cheek with a thumb to wipe away a tear, "Hey, why the tears, Pixie face?"

"She looks like Mama. I want Mama back. I miss my Mama!" She snuggled under his chin for comfort, wetting his shirt with her tears.

"Let's play a pretend game." He pulled her away from his chest and tucked her in bed again. "Let's pretend that your Mama has turned into this doll, and now you can keep her with you always. You know where I got this doll?"

The child shook her head as she settled back into the pillow.

"I bought this doll in Tucson, Arizona. Now, you know who comes from Tucson, Arizona?"

"Mama's family. Like she always says," Colleen said, pleased to know the answer.

"That's right. Mama's family came from Tucson. And I was in Tucson when I saw this little doll here just staring me in the face. And ya know what she said to me?"

"Dolls don't talk, Papa," she giggled.

"Hey, I thought we were pretending here? Now this here doll said to me, 'I wanna go to California and belong to a pretty little girl so she can love me.' And I said to that doll, I said, 'well now, I know just the pretty little girl you're talking about.' So I bought it and here she is, just for you."

"I'm glad you did, Papa, but it's still not having Mama home."

"I know, Pixie face." He sighed. "Colleen, you know what else I saw while I was in Arizona?"

"Indians?" The small child said hopefully.

"Well yes, I saw Indians, but I also saw where your Mama grew up. I asked around and I found the Thomas ranch. Of course, it belongs to a family named Whipple now, but they were really nice and they let me look around for awhile, after I told them about your Mama living there."

"Was it a ranch like this one?"

"No, it was a bit smaller ranch. Still, it was a nice ranch though. You know, the Whipple family showed me the same room your Mama had when she was just your age. It belongs to the Whipple girl now. Her name's Bonnie and she's about ten. The same age your Mama was when she left Arizona."

"And lived in San Francisco." Colleen added.

"That's right, and then she came to live here."

"And you made Mama marry you. Right, Papa?"

"Well now, I didn't exactly make her marry me. I asked your Mama to marry me."

"Tell me about it, Papa."

"Tell you about what?"

"About when you asked Mama to marry you."

"Oh, ah, well, I, ah-," Nick ran his hand over his mouth, chin and tugged at his ear. "It's late. You really need to get your beauty sleep, ya know. All pretty girls need their beauty sleep."

"But you said you would tell me a story. Tell me about when you asked Mama to marry you. Auntie Hope told me about when Uncle Heath asked her. She said it was very ro-man-nic."

"Romantic." Nick corrected.

"Yes, Auntie Hope said it was the night I was born."

"Oh, really? Well, that's very nice."

"Did you ask Mama when I was born, too?"

"What?! Hel-, I mean, heck no, we were already married when you were born."

"Then when, Papa?"

"When what?" He again attempted to avoid the subject.

"When did you ask Mama to marry you?"

"Ah, well, ya know, it was so long ago I forgot. You know, it's getting late. I need my beauty sleep too, so you get to sleep now, and I'll see you in the morning."

"Will you be here when I wake up?"

"Yes, I'll be here when you wake up."

"Promise?"

"Promise." Nick leaned down and gave her a kiss. "I love you."

"Papa? I think I have a name for my new doll. I'm going to call her My Lady, like you call Mama."

"That's a fine name, Pixie face. Good night." He pulled the coverlet under the child's chin.

* * * * * * * *

Nick didn't realize how exhausted he was as he sat on the bed to take his boots off. He pulled out his belt from its loops, letting it drop to the floor beside his boots. He unbuttoned his shirt, letting it fall opened to his sides, he laid his head back on the pillow and rubbed his sleepy eyes. Sleep quickly stole him away.

The smell of roses filled the night and his weary eyes opened to see a white gauzy image glide past the foot of the bed.

"Laura?"

"Yes, Nick." She sat at her vanity brushing her blonde locks. He had seen her do this evening ritual a thousand times before and never tired of it. He lay on his side with his elbow bent on a pillow to support his head.

"Come to bed. I miss you."

"I thought you were tired." She teased as she smiled at his reflection in the vanity mirror.

"I never tire of you."

"That's not what I meant," Laura smiled.

Nick pulled down the blankets on her side of the bed. "Come on."

She set her hairbrush down, stood and walked to her side of the bed. "I need to see my baby first."

"See me first." He winked at her and patted her side of the bed. Laura smiled and fanned out her negligee with her hands.

"What do you think?" Nick smiled at the familiar love game they had played since their honeymoon.

"It's looks beautiful," he smiled wickedly. "Especially at the foot of our bed."

She slowly began to untie the waist of the sheer white coat that covered her nightgown. She unbuttoned the tiny pearl buttons at the bodice and let the nightgown fall from her body. She stepped out of it, then tossed it at the end of their bed, and joined him. He pulled the covers over her naked body as he began to kiss her. She returned his kisses as her arms enclosed his tanned body. "Nick," she whispered, "I love you with all my heart."

"I love you, too." His kisses began to dart from her lips to the column of her neck.

"Nick?"

"Mmm?"

"I need to see my baby first."

Nick looked up from where his lips caressed her neck. "She's sleeping Sweetheart."

"I need to see her, Nick."

"Laura, I told you, Colleen's sleeping."

"Please, Nick, bring her to me."

"But Laura, she's..."

"Please Nick, please bring her to me, please." She began to sob.

"What are you doing? Why are you crying? Please don't cry.."

Nick could feel his chest wet with tears and a little arm lying across it. The loud sobbing assaulted his ears, and he abruptly opened his eyes to find Colleen, dressed in her white nightgown, sprawled across his chest, loudly crying. In the crook of her left arm she held the doll he bought her in Arizona.

"Colleen. What's wrong? Why are you crying?" He pushed himself up into a sitting position. He pulled her up so that he could see her face. The child's blue eyes were drowning in pools of hot tears. The sight of his daughter in so much pain broke the huge rancher's heart and he brought her into his protective arms. "Oh, my little girl. What's wrong?"

"The doll doesn't help," she choked out between sobs. "It's not Mama. I miss my Mama!" She dropped the doll on the bed and hugged her father with her now freed arms.

"I know, baby. I know. I miss your Mama, too." He kissed the top of her head and hugged her tightly. They sat on the bed for a long time, comforting each other. After awhile, Nick felt the steady breathing of his sleeping child. He picked her up, along with her new doll and brought her to her own bed where he tucked her in for the night. "Tomorrow, Pixie face, I promise."

Part 26

Anyone who knew Nick Barkley would tell you that he was a straight forward honest man, who would never allow the ethereal images of strange dreams to decide his actions in any manner. But the nighttime events he had experienced could not be ignored. His wife, Laura, begged to see their child. In the cold light of day, his mind knew it was only a dream... but his heart told him it was as real as the coffee cup in his hand. He stared at the dark liquid as its heady aroma met his nostrils. It was his Laura's habit to have a cup of coffee early every morning. He would sometimes watch from bed as she stood by their bedroom window and watched the night shadows give way to the sun creeping over the house. He would have loved to be privy to her morning thoughts, but she never shared them. Sometimes he'd imagined she was a queen surveying her domain. To him, she was just that. She was his queen, and he, her consort. Now he looked out of that same window as he mulled over what words he was going to use on his daughter. He worried how she was going to react to the news of her mother. Nick missed his wife's wise counsel.

"Papa!" The child burst into the room, her dark curls tangling in the breeze as she ran toward him, and was caught up in her father's arms.

"Whoa there, Cowgirl! Where are you going in such an all fired hurry?"

"Lupe told me we were going to ride into town! See, I have my riding clothes on! Can My Lady come too, even if she doesn't have riding clothes?" The small child held up the fashionably dressed new doll.

"I sure wouldn't want her fine clothes to get all dirty, but it's up to you."

"Oh she'll be careful. She promised me she would."

"Well, since she promised then it's alright." He placed his coffee cup on the mantel and took the child to the nearest chair, where she sat on his lap.

"What are we going to do in Stockton, Papa?"

"You're Mama's in Stockton, Sweetie."

She bounced excitedly on his lap. "Mama came home from Boston?! We're going to meet her train? Yippee!"

"Not exactly, Sweetie. You see, well, she won't be on the train."

"But Uncle Jarrod said she went to Boston to take care of Aunt Polly."

"Yes, of course, that's what Uncle Jarrod said. Your Mama went to Boston because Aunt Polly was very sick, and ah-, well, the good news is that Aunt Polly's well again, but Mama isn't, so she's staying with Doctor James. You remember Doctor James don't you?"

"Yes, she's very nice. She gives me candy when I see her."

"Yes, she's a very nice lady. And she's taking care of your mother."

"Did Mama get sick cuz a Aunt Polly? Ya know Leah had the sniffles and gave 'em ta Michael and Auntie Hope wouldn't let me in the nursery no more, cuz she didn't want me ta get sick too, so I had to play with my toys in Grandlee's room, but then Grandlee got mad cuz she stepped on Charger.."

"Charger?"

"Yeah, my toy horse Charger, the one Uncle Heath made me?"

"Oh yeah, right, that Charger." Nick hid a smile.

"So Grandlee told me to take my toys away, so I went to the kitchen, but Uncle Silas got mad too, cuz I was having mud soup with my dollies and Uncle Silas said I was not to use his soup tureen to make mud soup. He said, 'no mo' young Missy! " She imitated the dark man's voice and gesture of shaking his finger.

"You made mud soup in the soup tureen?"

"No Papa, I made it the mixing bowl. I served it in the soup tureen, Silly. Everyone knows that's the proper way to serve soup!"

"Oh, of course, sorry." Nick smiled at the thought of the very gentle Silas getting upset when anyone used his kitchen utensils. "So where did you go from there with your toys?"

"Uncle Jarrod let me use the library, and he didn't complain once!" Colleen announced triumphantly. "Not even when he stubbed his big toe on my red wagon."

"You mean Uncle Jarrod didn't say anything when he stubbed his toe?"

"Well, he did, but I couldn't make it out. Boy howdy! Did he turn beet red!"

"Boy howdy? Hmmm, I see you've been spending time with Uncle Heath too."

"He's been giving me riding lessons."

"Speaking of riding, let's you and I get going to Stockton."

"To see Mama?!" She said excitedly.

"To see Mama." He lifted her up over his shoulder and carried her out of the room, taking care to bend down under the doorway.

* * * * * * * *

Nick had settled his daughter up in front of him on his horse, Hero and they rode for some time, still on Barkley land. Nick enjoyed listening to his daughter's conversation with her doll. Colleen smiled as she held tightly to her doll and prattled on. "We're going to see Mama, My Lady. I know she'll like you because you're a proper lady." Colleen kissed her doll's face.

"You know Pixie, Mama's going to be sleeping when we see her."

"We can wake her up."

"Well, now, she might not wake up right away. You see, she's sick and she needs to sleep to get better."

"You mean she's under a spell and can't wake up, like Sleeping Beauty?"

"Yes, that's exactly what I mean. Mama can't wake up right now."

"Oh, but she will Papa. She just needs a prince to kiss her. Like in the fairy tales."

"Sweetie, real life is not like fairy tales, you know..." The sound of horse hooves coming from behind stopped all conversation. Nick loosened the safety latch on his gun holster in preparation for a confrontation, if needed. He slowed his horse and gave a slight turn, taking care to shield his daughter from danger.

"Hello."

Colleen peeked her head out from under Nick's protective arm. "It's Uncle Jarrod! Hi Uncle Jarrod! We're gonna see Mama!"

"Really?" Jarrod gave a questioning look, and Nick nodded his affirmation in return.

"See my new dolly, Uncle Jarrod? I'm bringing it to Mama so she can see it. Isn't she pretty? Papa gave it to me."

"It's very nice, Princess." Again Jarrod looked questioningly at his brother.

"Fever broke yesterday."

"I'm happy to hear that, Nick."

"Thanks."

"Is she...conscious?"

"Not yet."

"Well, do you think it's wise to...?" Jarrod nodded in the child's direction who was too busy chattering to her new doll to listen to her elders' conversations.

"Yeah, I do," was Nick's terse reply. He kicked his horse to move onward.

"I'm going in to get my stitches out. Do you mind if I ride along?"

"It's a free country." Jarrod brought his mount in step with the sleek chocolate brown horse his brother rode.

"It seems, well, I owe you an apology." Jarrod began.

"Seems I owe you one as well. Sorry about the, you know, the other day. Did you re-injure your shoulder?"

"No, not at all. It's fine."

"Good." They rode along quietly. Tension still filled the air around the two brothers.

"Look, Jarrod, I guess we need to talk about things."

"I guess you're right."

"I'm really sorry about Carol. I can almost understand how you feel, since I came so close to, well, you know what I'm trying to say."

"I hope you never have to experience that kind of pain, Nick. I really do." An overwhelming feeling of loss began to creep into Jarrod's soul. He hadn't let himself mourn and now it was beginning to take over his entire being. He pushed his mount ahead of Nick's, as Nick pulled his own back to give him some private time.

"Papa, where's Uncle Jarrod going? We need to catch up to him," said the child.

"No rush. We'll be in town soon enough."

* * * * * * * *

The bell on the door rang out a warning of new visitors. Agatha had once again finished her patient's care and went out to greet the newcomer. A woman in her late forties stood before her, wrapped in a gold lace shawl and wearing a short, bright pink dance hall dress. Her platinum blonde hair was piled on top of her head, adorned with pink beads and gold feathers entwined throughout the large curls.

"May I help you, Miss?"

"Blakesen."

"Miss Blakesen. Are you ill?"

"Oh no, Ma'am, I mean Doctor. You know, it sure seems funny calling a woman 'Doctor', but it's nice to have one in town. I mean since Doc Merar left and all." The blonde woman fussed with her shawl, first pulling it tighter around her shoulders then letting it fall loose around her waist.

"I'm Doctor James, Miss Blakesen. How may I help you?"

"I came here to see Laura Barkley. I heard she was here."

"Are you a relative of hers, Miss Blakesen?"

"Oh hel-, I mean, heck no, we're just friends. Acquaintances ya might say."

"I see. Well, I'm afraid only the immediate family is allowed to see Mrs. Barkley. She's quite ill."

"Oh sure, I understand. Maybe I can talk to Nick, Mister Barkley. Is he here?"

"I'm sorry. He's not here as yet."

The doorbell rang behind them, and Nick walked in, carrying his daughter in his arms. He was taken aback when he caught sight of Belle standing before him. Jarrod brought up the rear and stared incredulously at the dance hall hostess.

"Papa! It's a Fairy Godmother!" Jarrod's blue eyes widened and he gagged back a guffaw, as Nick's face turned ashen.

Belle gave out a loud laugh then walked up to Nick's daughter. She tapped her index finger on Colleen's dimpled chin. "You are the cutest little dickens! Ya got your Mama's pretty eyes and your Papa's good looking smile. When he's smiling, that is. She's sure a treasure Nick, an absolute treasure."

"Ah-, I-, What-, what are you doing here, Belle?" Nick stammered.

"I just came to say I was sorry for what I said the other day. I wasn't myself, and I'm real sorry. Ya know, I have a great respect for your Laura and I just wanna say I wish her well." Belle wiped a single tear from her eye with the back of her finger, taking care not to smudge her eye make-up. "I said my piece, so I best be going." Belle quickly moved past Jarrod and out of the doctor's office. Nick and Jarrod watched the woman leave then stared at each other.

"You know the Fairy Godmother, Papa?!" Colleen asked happily.

"Ah-, I-, Ah-. You remember Doctor James, don't you, Colleen? Say hello to Doctor James."

Nick placed his daughter down on the floor and Colleen curtsied to the doctor. "Hello, Doctor James. See my new dolly? I came to show it to my Mama."

"Welcome, Colleen. It's quite a surprise to see you here." Agatha gave Nick a questioning look.

"How is Laura doing today? Any change?" Nick asked.

"Well, as you remember, her fever broke last night. She still has a low graded fever, but I do believe it's improving, although she has yet to regain consciousness. Sleep right now is the best medicine for her.

Nick bent down to eye level with his daughter. "Now, we talked about this, Colleen. I want you to understand that your mother is still not well. She won't look like the way you remembered her. Do you understand?"

"No," she shook her head.

"Well, I guess there's no real way to explain it. Come on." Nick took her into his strong arms and walked toward the door. He gave Agatha and Jarrod one last look before he entered the room where his wife lay.

* * * * * * * *

"At the risk of sounding like a case study, Doctor; is Laura's condition improving?" Jarrod said, suavely.

Agatha cleared her throat before she spoke. "I'm very sorry I offended you, Mister Barkley. I shouldn't have spoken out of turn that way."

"I suppose that's understandable. You were overwrought, as we all were at the time."

"Yes, of course. Well, now, if you would be so kind as to remove your cloth...ah, I mean, your shirt, I can take care of those stitches for you." Agatha moved toward a glass enclosed cabinet to retrieve the instruments she needed to look after Jarrod's wound. When she turned, a breath caught in her throat when she spied the elder Barkley sitting on a chair, bare chested. She clutched her hand to her breast. "Ohh, my.."

Jarrod turned toward her direction. "Is there something wrong?"

"Oh- no, of course not, Mr. Barkley. You look very healthy, I mean, your wound looks very healthy, I should say."

"How is that possible if you haven't taken the bandage off yet?" Jarrod sighed an impatient breath. He hated to be vulnerable in front of anyone, but especially this impertinent woman. It was unfortunate that she was the only doctor in town. A town the size of Stockton could certainly support two doctors. He made a mental note to look into it. Agatha began to cut away his bandage. Her hands skillfully and gently removed his wrappings.

"It's healed very well."

"Good." He waited until she began to cut the stitches. When she didn't do it quickly enough he turned back to look at her. "Doctor?"

"Yes?"

"You will remove the stitches today, won't you?"

"Yes, of course, I'm going to do that right now." Jarrod was highly aware of her gentle touch as the soft hands glided over his body. He gave out an involuntary sigh.

"Excuse me, I'm sorry! Did I hurt you?" Agatha quickly asked.

"No, not at all. Your touch is very gentle. You didn't hurt me at all." He thought about how long it had been since he felt a woman's hand on his bare skin. He shuddered inwardly at the inconsolable loss he had for his wife. Since he had returned to the home he'd shared with his wife, he couldn't bear the thought of sleeping in their bed, so he slept on the sofa in the parlor. Mrs. Delaney, his housekeeper, had turned down the master bed, and it remained, untouched, when he went inside the room to change his clothes. Agatha's voice invaded his reverie and he realized that he'd missed what she'd been saying.

"I said, you should have that bandage changed everyday; and please continue to wear the sling."

"Oh, yes, well. Thank you, Doctor."

"You're welcome."

Jarrod stared for a moment at her smoky gray eyes. She had long sweeping lashes that matched her dark auburn hair. "Do you wear those glasses all the time?"

"I beg your pardon?"

"Those glasses, do you wear them all the time?" Jarrod repeated.

"Well, yes, I do a lot of reading. My medical journals you know."

"Of course. I suppose that's where you read about your case studies, do you?" Jarrod stood and quickly donned his shirt. Agatha bowed her head, embarrassed.

"I do wish you would forget about that, Mister Barkley. It was very rude of me to vocalize my opinion that way. I'm afraid I am more outspoken, sometimes, than I need to be."

"Odd, because when I first met you, I didn't think you could put two sentences together. You seemed quite shy, almost painfully so."

"Oh goodness, not me. If anything, I am too outspoken. Hence, my ill voiced opinion."

Jarrod had pulled on a brown vest over his blue shirt. Then he smiled and lifted his finger in the air as if to give a summation. "You know, that's the second time you used that word, opinion." He began to pace in front of her as if she were sitting in a jury box. "Am I to surmise then, that you are not apologizing for your opinion, but rather for vocalizing your opinion? In other words, you still have that opinion of me."

"Ah-, wel-. You know, it's very admirable of you to want to care for your family and take on their problems."

"Admirable? Is that how you see it? Admirable."

"Being admirable is not offensive, it's, it's..."

"Admirable!" Jarrod answered for her, with indignant raised eyebrows.

"Ah-, well, yes."

"I see. Good day, Doctor James." Jarrod made a hasty exit from the office and Agatha shook her fists.

"Damn! That is the most frustrating man I have ever met!"

Part 27

Nick carried his daughter into the backroom. He watched her face intently to see what reaction she would have. The child was wide-eyed when she saw the small still form of her mother. A large cheesecloth tent that hung from a wooden roof-like structure concealed Laura’s upper body. Colleen pointed to the strange contraption.

"Papa, what's that?"

"That thing is called a steam tent. Your Uncle Heath made it." Nick brought her around to the other side of the bed to get a closer look. "Do you see that pan over the heater? That heater is what the Doctor calls a Bunsen burner, and in that pan is some medicine that the Doc made up. That's what smells so funny."

"It's awful, Papa. Does Mama like it?" She pinched her nose with her fingers.

"Well, it's not a matter of liking it, honey. That medicine smoking in the pan is going up through that stovepipe into the tent and is helping your Mama breathe better and it's bringing down her fever."

"Is it working, Papa?"

"It seems to be. Your Mama's fever has come down some, so that's good news."

"Can I go in the tent and see Mama?" Without a word, Nick brought her closer to the bed and pushed aside the cheesecloth so that Colleen could look at her mother's face.

"Oh, Papa! She looks just like the Sleeping Beauty in my book." Nick smiled at his daughter's analogy. He was thankful that the bruises on Laura's face and neck healed. She certainly did look like a sleeping beauty now.

"Yeah, she does, doesn't she?" He agreed.

"Can I touch her?"

"Of course you can." Nick pulled away several layers of the cloth and set the child on the bed so that she was under the tent with her mother. He knelt down close beside the bed, taking his wife's small hand in his and putting his other arm around his daughter.

"Mama? Can you hear me? It's me, Colleen. Can she hear me, Papa?" She placed her small hand on her mother's cheek.

"I don't know, she might. No harm in trying."

"Mama? Can you hear me, Mama? Mama, wake up!" Colleen turned to face her father and brought a little hand up to fist itself in his shirt collar. "Come here, Papa. Mama needs you." He let his daughter pull him under the tent with her.

"Pixie face, what are you doing?"

"Papa, you need to kiss her to break the spell."

"Honey, that only works in fairy tales. Mama's very sick."

"Please, Papa, please? I know it will work!"

"Colleen, I wish I had your faith," he said, shaking his head.

"Please Papa? It'll work. I know it will, please?" She yanked him closer with her fist. He gently pulled her hand from his shirt.

"Colleen, I don't want you to be hurt, sweetheart. Fairy tales are not real, baby. There's no such things as..." He stopped himself from speaking, remembering her very young impressionable age. Her wide blue eyes pleaded with her father, and he decided to humor her.

"All right, you win. I never could resist pretty women, not even the young ones." Nick leaned in under the tent and placed a kiss on his wife's lips. They felt soft and pliable, and he couldn't resist kissing her once more, this time more deeply. "I love you," he whispered quietly, then straightened himself.

Colleen smiled at him. "That was good, Papa. Now we wait."

"Wait? Wait for what, Colleen?"

"Wait for the magic to work." Nick took his daughter up into his arms and gave her a loving hug.

"Oh Colleen, you're the best little girl any father could have, do you know that?" She kissed him soundly on the cheek.

"And you're the best too, Papa!" She wrapped her little arms around his neck and gave him a squeeze. He laughed at her ardor and almost didn't hear her name being called.

"Colleen?"

Nick and Colleen both turned their attention to the sick bed. The cheesecloth was pushed away enough so that they could see Laura's opened eyes.

"Mama!" The child pulled away from her father's arms and crawled back onto the bed. She placed her little hands on her mother's cheeks and kissed her. "You see, Papa! I told you it would work!"

"Colleen?" Laura repeated. Nick couldn't believe his ears. He had so often imagined once again hearing the sound of his wife's voice, that now, as her whispers reached his ears, he was struck speechless. The tears streaked down his face as he moved closer to the bed and took her hand once again

"Laura, honey. It's me, Nick."

"Nick? You're home."

"I've been home for a while now. How do you feel?"

"Weak, ...hungry."

"We can fix that right now. I'll get Aggie." Nick rushed into the other room. Colleen remained seated on the bed with her mother.

"I knew when I saw the fairy godmother that you would be all right, Mama."

"Fairy godmother?" Laura asked softly.

Before Colleen could explain further, Agatha rushed into the room and stood by the bed, smiling. "Welcome back. You don't know how happy you've made me, made all of us. You had us worried."

"What happened?"

"You've been ill with a fever and pneumonia, but you're well on your way to recovery. Nick said you were hungry. I've got some rice pudding that should set right with your stomach. I'll be right back." Agatha retired to her small kitchen in back of the office. Nick sat by the bed and took Laura's hand in his again.

"I love you, ya know that?" Laura gave a weak smile and nodded her head. "And I'm going to tell you that every day for the rest of your life."

"Papa kissed you awake Mama, like a fairy princess." Colleen nodded enthusiastically.

Agatha came back with a small dish of rice pudding. "I'll take that," Nick said, as he took the bowl in his large hands. "Is this all? She's hungry!"

"It will be more than enough for now." Agatha pulled back the cheesecloth drapes and fluffed up the pillows. Nick helped his wife to sit up.

"I'm as weak as a kitten," she complained, already exhausted from the movements.

"You don't have to worry about that. You've got me to lean on. Come on now, let's get some food into you." Nick served up a spoonful of rice pudding. Agatha brought her a glass of water.

"Here's something to wash it down with." She assisted Laura in taking a small sip.

"Thank you. That was good." Agatha wiped her mouth with a napkin that she had brought along.

"Have another spoonful." Laura accepted another helping from Nick then shook her head. "Come on, you have to eat more, Laura."

"Can't." Her voice was hardly above a whisper now as she closed her eyes.

"Laura, come on. You need to eat." Nick encouraged. She slowly raised her hand in protest. "Hey, come on. You're eating for two now." Nick's words fell on deaf ears for she had fallen asleep again. Agatha took the bowl of pudding from his hands.

"I wouldn't push it. She needs to rest."

"She needs to eat," Nick argued.

"She will when she's ready. Be grateful that she ate that much without becoming ill. Eventually she will begin to eat better. You must have patience. Your wife has been through quite an ordeal." Agatha placed a comforting hand on Nick's shoulder. "Let her rest. Why don't you take your daughter home? I think you've all had enough for one day."

"But.."

"Nick, she's going to be fine. She needs to rest, to regain her strength."

"What about the baby?"

"Time will tell."

"What baby, Papa?" Colleen asked, still sitting on the bed beside her now sleeping mother.

"You're going to be a big sister, Colleen." Nick smiled happily as he reached over to take her into his arms again. "Come on. Let's go home and tell the family."

* * * * * * * *

"Jarrod, I really wish you would re-consider. At least stay for dinner." She stood in the middle of the library watching Jarrod at the enormous oak desk. He was gathering papers and stuffing them into the briefcase that fit between his sling-covered arm and his body.

"I'm fine, Mother, and Mrs. Delaney has some fine Irish stew waiting for me."

"Irish stew can keep. We're having your favorite today, Jarrod."

"Chicken gumbo?" Jarrod asked with a gleam in his eye.

"Yes," Victoria answered.

"Ah, that is tempting, but, alas, I have much to do. I'm trying to re-establish my practice, you know, after that disastrous decision I made to become county prosecutor. Carol warned me, but-." He gave a short sigh and then snapped his briefcase closed with his free left hand. He refused to let himself grieve and pushed it out of his mind. He had the family's well being to think of: Laura, Colleen and Nick. Jarrod loved his brother, and if the best way he could help him was to stay away from the family, then so be it.

"It can certainly wait one day, Jarrod."

"Not today, Mother, sorry. Another time, perhaps." He moved past her towards the doorway.

"Is it Nick?" Jarrod stopped and turned toward her.

"What?"

"You're avoiding your brother. Is that the reason?"

"Not at all. Why just this morning, he and I rode into Stockton together to the doctor's office."

"No problems?"

"Not at all. We were very companionable."

"No doubt because Colleen was there."

"That's irrelevant. We got along fine. Water under the bridge." He gave her his best reassuring smile.

"Prove it. Stay for dinner."

"Oh, Mother really! We're not little boys anymore." He placed his hand on the doorknob. "After you, dear lady." Her skirts swished past him.

* * * * * * * *

Outside, Nick dismounted and tied his horse to the corral fence. He came close to his mount again and patted his shoulders, extending an invitation to his daughter for an impromptu 'horsy ride'. Colleen scrambled to get on board.

"What do you say? Who should yell it first?" Nick asked.

"Let's do it together," Colleen said, gleefully, as she wrapped her small arms under his chin.

"Alright," Nick agreed, securing his hold on her legs around his neck. "Watch your head, Cowgirl," he warned, as he bent his knees enough to allow both of them through the large oak door.

"GRANDLEE, WE'RE HOME!" Nick and his daughter shouted in unison. Victoria entered the foyer and stood with her hands on her hips.

"Oh, my word! Now I have two of them shouting the house down!" she complained, jovially. Jarrod gave them an apologetic smile as he followed behind his mother. He had hoped to be gone before Nick arrived home.

"Uncle Jarrod!" shouted Colleen, as she pushed herself off her father's shoulder, with him aiding her by bending down low. The child rushed to her uncle. Jarrod knelt down and gave her a one armed hug.

"Hey, Princess!"

"Guess what? Mama's better!" Her blue eyes twinkling as she spoke.

"Is that true?!" exclaimed Victoria, looking at her middle son for confirmation. He nodded. "Oh, Nick, that's wonderful news!"

"And not only that, Duchess," he grabbed her arms and held them fast, "But you're going to be a grandmother again!"

"Oh Nick!" Victoria cried as she accepted a hug. Jarrod stood smiling at his brother; an

overwhelming feeling of both joy and sadness had taken his voice away and rendered him speechless. Nick smiled at his older brother, expecting a word, but Jarrod simply turned and walked quietly back to the library. Victoria gave Nick a sympathetic look as her eyes pleaded with him to forgive his brother for whatever transgressions he may have committed. Nick quietly followed Jarrod into the library and closed the door. He found Jarrod sitting at his desk, sobbing, his face buried in the crook of his good arm. Nick knelt beside him, his strong arms hugging his brother. It was reminiscent of the time he and Heath had found him at Libby Matthew's farm, when he was suffering from amnesia.

"JARROD? What's wrong?"

"I'm sorry, Nick. I'm so sorry," he mumbled between sobs, his face still locked in his good arm.

"Hey, big brother, you've got nothin' to be sorry for. Hell, it was me who acted like a jackass. Damn it, Jarrod, you're my brother. I-, well, you must know how I feel about you. I was a fool to accuse you of stealing my family. You did what I couldn't. You protected my little girl when-. Aw, blast it all, Jarrod! I'm the one who needs to say I'm sorry, not you. You've always been there for us, especially after Father died. We could always depend on Pappy. In my usual pigheaded way, I forgot that, and I'm sorry Jarrod, I'm truly sorry." Try as hard as he might, Nick couldn't hold back his own tears. Blue eyes and hazel eyes, both red rimmed and filled with large tears, met in sorrow.

"I miss Carol so much. I loved her, I really loved her, Nick. Why did they kill her? Why couldn't I listen? Why couldn't I protect her? Why couldn't I protect Laura? I was so scared they were going to kill her, too. I didn't know what to do. My God, I was just so damned afraid!"

"I know, Jarrod. I know. I felt the same way. I've never been so scared in all my life."

"What kind of man can't protect his family?!"

"Jarrod, you did what you could. None of us knew how dangerous they were or how far they would go to exact their revenge. Damn it Jarrod, listen to me! It's not your fault!" Nick hugged his brother and shook him, trying to get him to listen to reason.

"Never again, Nick. I promise, never again."

"What are you talking about, Jarrod? Never again what?"

"I'm never going to put any woman in danger like that again, never! I won't marry again, never again!" He sobbed into his brother's chest. Nick pulled him up to meet his eyes again.

"You can't be serious Jarrod. You can't mean that. In time, a woman will come along..."

"No, never! I will not put any woman in that kind of danger."

"Come on, Pappy. It's not like you to give up. Barkleys don't give up. Hell, you've told me that enough times. Hey, I could sure use a drink. How about you? It's been a long day. Celebrate with me. Laura's going to be fine, and soon we'll bring her home." Nick left Jarrod at the desk to collect himself. Nick couldn't bear to see his brother so dejected. He needed to look away, and he sure needed a drink. Nick poured a drink first for himself, drinking half of it, before he poured one for Jarrod. When Nick turned, he found Jarrod standing, wiping his eyes with a handkerchief. Jarrod cleared his throat to compose himself.

"Well, I certainly will be happy to celebrate with you Nick." Jarrod took the offered glass.

"Listen, I know I don't deserve to ask any favors from you, but-"

"Ask away, Nick." Jarrod gratefully took a generous gulp of the drink.

"I'm asking you to move back in here for awhile."

"Why?"

"Well, Laura's going to be coming home soon, and I'm going to need a lot of help with her. Aggie was saying today that Laura's going to be very weak, and she may be in a wheel chair for a while."

"But why would you need me around?"

"Hey, you know, as good as Heath is, he's got more than enough work around here. He's doing his own, plus mine. It's time I relieved him. In the meantime, I need somebody to look after Laura's needs while I'm working."

"What could she need that Mother or Silas couldn't get for her?"

"Well, for one thing, someone's gotta carry her up and down the stairs. She's got a broken ankle ya know. I can't be here every minute, I've got a ranch to run."

"I'm sure one of the hands could-,"

"Hey, now wait a minute here! You don't think I'm going to trust my wife's care to just anybody, do you? 'Sides, I don't want just anyone touching my wife. I trust you do."

"You trust me?" Jarrod replied, with a hint of sarcasm.

"Yeah, I trust you. My big brother."

"Very well, I'll be here when you can't. But I can't do much carrying with this arm in a sling, you know." Jarrod reminded him by patting his right arm.

"Well, I know that, but you won't be in that forever. 'Sides I plan on being around the first week or two until Laura starts getting her strength back. Just how long is Aggie gonna have you in that sling?"

"Not too long if I can help it. Actually, my arm feels pretty good now. I don't know why she insisted I keep it in a sling."

"Well, that's a woman for ya." Jarrod pulled his arm out of the sling and moved it side to side and up and down. "How's it feel?"

"Actually not bad, not bad at all." Jarrod glanced up from his injured arm. "You know, I don't think that woman knows what she's talking about."

"Just the same, you probably could use a little more physical work to get that arm back in shape and carrying a beautiful woman around would be just what the doctor ordered."

"Hmm, I suppose." Jarrod said absently as he placed his arm back into its sling. "Do you really think she's beautiful?"

"Of course I do! Don't you?!"

"Oh I don't know I suppose she is mildly attractive."

Nick placed his hands on his hips. "Are we talking about the same woman here?"

"Who are you talking about?"

"My wife! Who the hell else would I be talking about?" Nick growled.

"Oh, yes, of course, sorry." Jarrod apologized.

"You know, the problem with you is, you sit on your ass all day in a stuffy office. If you got out and breathed some fresh air maybe it would clear your head!" Nick left the room in an impatient huff.

"Oh yes, Nick, it's done wonders for your hard head! God knows!" Jarrod quipped back.

Part 28

A week went by before Nick was able to take his wife home. He brought the Barkley buggy because it gave the smoothest ride. He was concerned about her being jostled in her delicate condition and she was still quite weak from her ordeal. Laura wore a blue plaid cotton dress that hung loosely due to her recent weight loss. Her once pink cheeks were pale and sunken beneath dull blue eyes. A cumbersome cast that reached from just below her knee to encase her foot weighed down her left leg. She laid a tired head on Nick's strong shoulder, her hands clinging lovingly around his sinewy bicep. Nick shrugged his shoulder gently to wake her.

"Hey, are you sleeping on me again?" He glanced down at her.

"Uh huh, do you mind?" she said, not lifting her head.

"Well, you're not hearing anything I'm saying."

"Yes, I have. You said that the entire family is waiting to see me at home. I'm glad we have this time alone together though."

"Mmm, so you can sleep on me," he teased with a wry smile.

"No, it seems like forever since we've been alone. All that time at Agatha's place. I must have been badly off if you brought me there. I don't remember ever being so sick. I'm sorry I frightened you, but at least now you've seen what a wonderful doctor Agatha is."

"Are you patting yourself on the back for bringing her to Stockton?"

"Yes," she laughed softly.

"You would!" He rolled his eyes.

"There's something I don't understand though." She lifted her head up from his arm.

"What's that?"

"Why didn't Aggie tell me about the baby first? Why did she tell you? I mean it's a woman's prerogative to tell her husband he's about to become a father, but this was the other way around. You told me; it's very disconcerting."

"Well, honey, you weren't well, is all. Come on, rest your head on my arm again."

"No, I'll rest when I get home." She willed herself to sit up and looked out onto the vista as they rode under the Cross B sign hanging above the entrance to the Barkley Ranch. "You know, I never get tired of looking at this beautiful ranch. It always takes my breath away."

"I know what you mean, me too."

"I'll never forget the first time I saw it. When Papa brought me home and we took a short cut to get to his house, remember?" she said, squeezing her husband's arm.

"I'll never forget it. That's the first day I laid eyes on ya. I was a goner!" His chuckle made her smile, but it faded just as quickly.

"Nick, why did we go the long way? We usually go by my father's house."

"Oh- well, I just wanted to have a little more time alone with ya, Milady, is all. Only way to do it

was to take the long way."

"Jarrod sold the house," Laura said, with a sudden realization.

"What?"

"I just remembered. Jarrod sold my father's house."

"Oh, yeah, that's right. He did." He knew Laura remembered nothing of what had happened to her and only now were bits and pieces of the recent past slowly starting to surface. He dreaded the time when he would have to fill in the blank spots of her memory.

"Jarrod asked me to sign the deed the next time I was in town. You know, I don't remember if I did that."

"Aw well, you're always forgetful when you're pregnant," He chuckled.

"I am not!" She slapped his arm, "Oh you! You love to tease!"

Nick gave a hearty laugh and slapped the reins of the horse. "Aah, you're too easy!" They both laughed as the horse jogged along at a faster pace.

* * * * * * * *

When they pulled up to the Barkley mansion they were greeted on the veranda by Jarrod, Mother, Heath, Hope and the children. Silas was at the opened doorway standing ready with the large caned back wheelchair. Several of the hands moved about in the courtyard to watch the homecoming.

"Ah, welcome home!" Victoria said, with a joyful clap of her hands.

Heath, shifting little Michael in his arms, grinned at her, "It's good to have you home."

"I've missed all of you." Laura smiled happily down on the faces of her family.

"Hurray, Mama's home!" Colleen yelled, jumping up and down. She moved closer to the buggy to be the first to greet her mother, but Nick held his hand up.

"Hold on there, Pixie face. I've got to carry your Mama. She can't walk right now, so stand back." The dark haired child moved away into her grandmother's protective grasp. Nick was gathering Laura in his arms when Lud Akely drew up to the pair.

"Excuse ma'am, uh, Mrs. Barkley. The name's Lud Akely." He pulled his hat off and held it to his chest, then brought out a bouquet of flowers that had been hidden behind his back. "These are for you, Ma'am, from me and the hands, to welcome you back."

Laura was stunned by the presentation since she rarely had contact with any of the ranch hands, save Duke McCall or Ciego. She brought the bouquet of red roses to her nose to take in their fragrance. "Thank you, Mr. Akely. Please express my appreciation to the other gentlemen. They're lovely. Roses are my favorite flower."

"You're welcome, Ma'am. And the name's Lud, ma'am."

"Thanks, Lud." Nick said impatiently beside the carriage, still holding his light burden.

"Laura, come on, let's go inside," Nick pleaded. She gave Lud an appreciative smile as she placed her arms more securely around Nick's wide shoulders. He carried her into the house as Silas pulled the wheelchair back into the foyer. The family gathered around as Nick gently placed Laura in the caned back walnut chair. "There's your new throne, for a while, anyway."

"It's rather comfy, isn't it?" she said, as she placed a hand on each of the large wheels.

"Only the best for the Barkleys," Jarrod quipped. "That carriage has seen its fair share of Barkleys over the years. Nick at least once, and Mother as well."

"I even took a turn in it for a while," Heath joked.

"Coming from you, Heath Barkley, that doesn't surprise me," Laura teased. She glanced up at Jarrod's smiling face and noticed his arm in a sling. "Goodness, Jarrod, what happened to you?"

"Oh, it's nothing. Just an accident, that's all. Nothing to concern yourself with." Jarrod quickly said, then led them into the parlor, in hopes of changing the subject. "Drinks, anyone?" Nick took his place behind the chair and pushed it into the parlor, then he knelt beside it so that he was eye level with his wife.

"What can I get you to drink? Milk?"

"I would love a lemonade, if you don't mind. Milk later I think," she smiled sweetly at his thoughtfulness.

"Could I have a lemonade too, Papa?" chimed in Colleen.

"Sure, come on, help me get it." Nick was hesitant to leave for fear that Laura would ask about Carol Barkley's absence, but after giving Heath a look of caution, he took his daughter's hand and quickly disappeared into the kitchen.

Heath knelt down near the wheelchair, with baby Michael still in his arms. "Look who wants to greet his aunt."

"Oh please, could I hold Michael? It's been so long since I held the children," Laura pleaded.

Heath placed the contented sleepy child in the cradle of Laura's enfolding arms. "Leah's been fussing but Michael here is having a good day." Laura looked down at the blond haired, blue eye child.

"Oh, Heath, he's grown so much. He's so handsome." She placed her hand in the curl of his chubby little fingers.

"Just like his daddy." Heath winked. He stood up, close to the chair, anticipating her becoming tired from holding the child too long in her still weakened condition.

"Here's Leah." Hope said, moving closer and leaning down so that Laura could look at her.

"Good Lord, look at how they've changed. Michael's a bit larger isn't he?"

"A pound or two I'd say," Hope agreed.

"They are so beautiful looking and so healthy."

Nick brought out a tray of ice cold lemonade. "I brought out extra in case anyone else wants some." He placed the tray on the nearest table. "Hope, would you like a glass?"

"Yes please, Nick." She settled herself down on the sofa with Leah still in her arms, and allowed Nick to serve her a drink. Heath took Michael from Laura's arms.

"I'll take him. You have your drink now." Heath sat beside his wife. The look they shared communicated to one another the dread each felt for what must be revealed to Laura soon.

"Thank you." Laura took the lemonade from Nick.

He again squatted down to her level. "How are you doing? Tired yet?"

"I'm fine, Nick, really." She eased his concern with a gentle pat on his arm. He stood again, satisfied with her answer.

"Of course you are," Victoria agreed. "You look wonderful. It's so good to have the entire family again under one roof. I am so looking forward to dinner later this evening."

"Hmm, so am I." Laura said, after taking a sip of the cool liquid. "What do you suppose is keeping Carol?"

Silence filled the room as all eyes went to Nick, who busied himself staring down at the drink in his hand. Laura noticed the pregnant silence in the room. "Is it something I said? What's wrong?"

"Mama, Auntie Carol's in heaven." Colleen said, breaking the silence.

"What? What in the world are you talking about?" Laura's voice rose an octave. "Good Lord, Colleen, where on earth did you ever get such an idea?! I never heard such nonsense!"

Nick knelt down again beside the wheelchair. He took his wife's hand in his, compelling her to listen to him carefully. "Laura, Carol had an accident."

"Accident? What kind of accident?" Laura looked wildly around the room, for confirmation or at least a sign that it was horrible joke. Surely, she thought, Jarrod could allay her fears and she looked to him. Jarrod's face seemed to drain of color as he appeared to study the floor.

"I'll tell you about it when we're alone," Nick promised. "This is not the place to discuss this." Nick stood again, turning his back on her.

"Please, Nick, tell me!" She begged.

"I'm sorry, not here." Nick stubbornly shook his head, refusing to turn around. "I'll tell you later when we're alone."

Laura sat ramrod straight, and she spoke as firmly as she could in her frail condition. "No, you will tell me now, I have to know." Laura was on the verge of panic. Her heart began to pound wildly and her breathing became labored as thoughts began to swim in her head. 'Is Carol really dead? Why do I feel it's my fault?' Her eyes again sought her brother-in-law. "Jarrod?"

Jarrod put his drink down and moved toward his sister-in-law. He sat on the small marble table directly in front of her. Hope immediately stood and took Colleen's hand.

"Come along Colleen, you can help me put Leah to bed. We can tell her a story." Heath stood as well, his son still in his arms.

"Michael's about ready for a nap too." Heath followed his wife and Colleen upstairs. Nick knelt beside his wife and took her small fragile hand in his. Jarrod and Nick eyed each other. Laura looked from one and then the other, her eyes begging for answers.

"Laura, I'm sorry." Jarrod began, "It's true, Carol's dead." Her eyes quickly filled with tears, as she touched Jarrod's injured shoulder.

"Is that the reason you're hurt?"

"No, Fair Lady, not at all." Jarrod soothed her with a sad smile and took her hand from his shoulder. "The law office was broken into. Carol was there when it happened. They," his voice faltered, "they killed her." Jarrod lowered his head. His tears began to flow unabated. Laura sobbed as she pulled her hands from both Nick and Jarrod and enveloped Jarrod's shoulders with her arms.

"Oh Jarrod, I'm so sorry. I'm so very sorry." She didn't understand why but the sudden guilt she felt in her heart consumed her. She sat up again and searched her husband's face. Nick shook his head and tunneled his fingers through his hair in frustration. He knew the truth had to come out, but he didn't want it to happen this way. He had hoped to tell her when they were alone.

"But why would anyone break into a law office?" She said, puzzled. "There isn't any money there."

'There are files there, important papers that could either make or break a case, but nothing of value, really." Jarrod answered. He avoided telling her that Jason Browne had confessed to killing Carol, although Jason never made it clear as to his reason. It was a mystery Jarrod had yet to solve.

Laura's mind briefly recalled the folder of affidavits she had given to Carol. It was the last night she remembered seeing Carol alive.

* * * *

"Carol, please, I need to speak to you about something. I wasn't honest with you before, but I need you to know the whole truth now."

"What is it?" Carol stood up from the large desk, her hands flat on its surface. Laura handed her a thin brown leather folder.

"What I have in here could help you with your case; but please understand I can't testify. I couldn't do that, so please don't ask me."

* * * *

Laura's hands flew up to her mouth, "Oh my God! Oh my God! It's my fault! Carol's dead, and it's my fault!"

Both Nick and Jarrod quickly tried to calm Laura as she sobbed, near hysterics. Victoria rushed to her side and wrapped her arms around her distraught daughter-in-law. "I think it's best you take her upstairs, Nick. We should get Agatha here right away."

Jarrod stood up. "I'll get her here as soon as possible." Nick swept his weeping wife into his arms and carried her upstairs to their bedroom.

Part 29

Jarrod took the Barkley carriage to retrieve the good doctor from Stockton. The couple rode in a formal silence. Neither one seemed willing to start a conversation. Finally, Jarrod cleared his throat before he spoke.

"Are you originally from San Francisco, Doctor James?"

"No, Seattle, Washington."

"Ah, yes, good logging country up there."

"Yes, it is," came the terse reply. The doctor refused to look at the gentleman on her right. Jarrod Barkley always made her nervous. No matter what she said to him she seemed to offend his delicate sensibilities. Agatha was determined to make any conversation with him as short as possible without seeming impolite.

Jarrod was also avoiding looking at his passenger, but for a far different reason. He knew that his eyes were red-rimmed from sobbing and he wasn't about to show any weakness to her. Doctor Agatha James was much too forward to his liking. Although Jarrod had no fear of intelligent women, in fact he often sought their company, he surmised this one to be too haughty for her own good. Still, it was a long ride to the ranch and it would be rude not to seek polite conversation.

"Is your family in the business?"

"Business?" she asked puzzled. Her mind had wandered to the point that she didn't even remember what they were conversing about.

"The lumber business? In Seattle?" Jarrod added.

"No, my father was a surgeon. My mother a violinist. She taught music."

"Are you as adept in music as you are in medicine?"

"No. Medicine is my only passion."

"I see. So, you decided to follow in your father's footsteps."

"Yes."

They rode quietly for a few minutes. Agatha took in the scenery, not that it held any interest for her, but she wanted to avoid looking at those incredible blue eyes or the slight crease above his chin that moved when he spoke. But then again, there was his voice, too. It's rich sound was like velvet. Agatha shook those thoughts away and concentrated on the horse's tail as it swished side to side; anything was better than concentrating on him. Jarrod's hands came into view. He had soft but strong hands. They weren't work weary hands, but they were strong hands. She remembered when they first met. She could still feel their touch. Those two strong hands slapped the reins of the horse.

'Two strong hands?' she thought. "You're not wearing your sling!"

"What? Oh, yes, well. I don't need it. I'm perfectly fine without it," he said, quite pleased with his ability to heal quickly.

"And did you earn your medical degree at the same time you earned your law degree?" she said, with a hint of sarcasm.

"I beg your pardon?" Jarrod said, finally looking to his left. He noticed her face was flushed with indignation.

"You were told to wear a sling by your physician, if I am not mistaken."

"Ah, yes, well. My physician, I fear, was being overly cautious. My arm has no ill effects of my injury." Jarrod said with a teasing twinkle in his eye. "My shoulder is fine, and the use of my arm is preferable to that sling."

"Overly cautious, am I?"

"Yes, but I understand," he said, still smiling.

"You understand? Understand what?"

"It's a woman's nature to be overly cautious. No doubt a motherly instinct," he reasoned.

Agatha sat straight, her fists going to her hips in a posture of disapproval and reprimand. She turned to face the lawyer. "I'm am not overly cautious, nor am I being motherly to you or anyone else! I am a professional, and I understand well how the body heals."

"Then you understand how some heal faster than others."

"I understand that you decided to ignore my orders, as your physician!"

"I took the sling off to drive this carriage. In fact, to save you the trouble of driving your own carriage out to the ranch! That sling has only been off for a short while!"

"You needn't have bothered! I am quite capable of driving myself."

"I have no doubt you are capable, however my sister-in-law is in need of you, post haste."

"Of course."

"Now what is that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing." Her voice rose as she folded her arms in front of herself and looked straight ahead. Jarrod gave a deep sigh and shook his head. He forced himself to not contradict the insufferable woman. The rest of the ride would be in silence. He would be damned if he would dare make any more polite conversation. Nothing could have pleased him more than when the Barkley mansion came into view. A gentleman to the end, Jarrod assisted the doctor down from the carriage, placing his strong hands around her tiny waist.

Their steely eyes met. 'What lovely gray eyes,' Jarrod thought, as his blue eyes softened toward her. The two were almost the same height when she wore her shoes with the two inch heels.

'His eyes are bloodshot. Is he tired or was he-? Yes. He looks like he's been crying.' Instantly her gaze softened towards him, and she gave a demure smile with her thank you.

"You're welcome," he said, as he opened the large oak door for her. Victoria greeted the woman at the door and assisted her with the dark blue cape tied around her shoulders.

"Doctor James, how good of you to come so quickly. Nick and Hope are upstairs with Laura. We put her to bed. She was quite upset. Did my son tell you what happened?"

"Yes, he did. Laura found out about poor Carol's demise." Agatha stole a look at Jarrod. He bent his head down to avoid letting anyone see his renewed tears. He mumbled an excuse and left the women to climb the gold carpeted stairs. Victoria led the auburn haired woman to Nick and Laura's room. Nick opened the door when he heard the knock.

"Oh, good, Aggie, you're here. I'll get Silas to make up the guest room for you," Nick informed her. "Did you bring your bags?"

"I beg your pardon? I only brought my medical bag. I wasn't aware I was to stay the night."

"Yeah, well, you are. You can get your things in the morning," Nick ordered. "And you're not staying for just the night. You're staying as long as my wife needs you."

"I beg your pardon. I have other patients."

"Aggie, all your patients are in this house. It's not like anyone else goes to you, ya know."

Hope shook her head. "Nick, for heaven's sakes!"

Nick held his hands out, palms upward, in a questioning gesture. "What? Ya know I'm right! The only patients she has are here! Now go tend to your patient. Hope's finally gotten her to sleep, so keep your voices down." He left the room in a whirlwind.

Agatha shook her head at Hope. "You'd think I would be used to him by now," she said, eyeing the door Nick had closed behind him.

"Nick takes a bit of getting used to. Even I'm still working on it," Hope chuckled.

The two women moved toward the sleeping patient. Hope pointed to a chair by the side of the bed, inviting her to sit.

"How bad was she?"

"They told her about Carol. She was quite upset. She's blaming herself," Hope said, filling in the blanks.

"I don't understand. Why would she blame herself for Mrs. Barkley's death?" The doctor asked as she felt Laura's head for any sign of fever.

Hope pulled up another chair and sat beside the doctor. The two women spoke quietly. Hope told Agatha what she knew about the two men who had kidnapped her cousin and were responsible for Carol Barkley's death.

"If, as you say, this lawyer, Jason Browne killed Carol then why would Laura blame herself?" the doctor asked.

"I suppose because Laura knew Jason Browne back when she lived in San Francisco. He was her beau at one time."

"Oh my goodness, really? And he killed Carol Barkley? But why?" Agatha's face drained of color.

"No one seems to know, but Browne confessed it to Jarrod before he died. Browne was the one who shot Jarrod."

"Oh my Lord!" She placed her hand over her mouth, then stood and began to pace. "Poor Mister Barkley. He could have been killed by that awful man!"

Hope cocked her head to one side. "Mister Barkley? You're still calling Jarrod by his

surname?"

"He never gave me any indication that I should address him otherwise."

Hope stood from her seat, shaking her head. "That Jarrod, sometimes he can be so pompous, Lord love him. In that regard he is quite the opposite of Nick."

Agatha looked surprised at the shorter woman. "And how is he like Nick?"

"His temper."

"Oh yes, I've seen his temper! We've had a few cross words."

"Oh no, I assure you, you have not seen Jarrod's temper, not if you only had a few cross words with him. Not many people have experienced his temper. He's quite good at controlling it; but Heath and Nick have both seen Jarrod's unabated temper and according to them, it's a frightening sight."

"Really?"

"Mmm, yes, it's quite volatile. More so than Nick's, I'd wager." Hope felt the urgency of her milk-filled breasts and moved toward the doorway. "I better see to feeding the twins. Excuse me, Agatha. I'll see you at dinner later."

Nick passed Hope in the doorway as he walked back into his bedroom. He spoke just above a whisper. "Your room's ready for you, Aggie, right next to Jarrod's."

"Next to Jarrod's, ah I mean, Mister Barkley?"

"Yeah, it's the biggest one on this floor, and it's not too far from us in case we need you. The guest room near Heath's old room is too small. We want you to be comfortable. How's she doing, Doc?"

"Excuse me?"

"Laura. How's she doing?"

"Oh, she seems to be resting comfortably. You know, Nick, you really don't need me here to-"

"Oh yes I do, and you're not leaving; now, please have a seat. I want to talk to you."

Before Agatha could seat herself comfortably by the hearth, Nick was already firing questions. But Agatha's mind was elsewhere and she didn't hear any of them.

"So, do we come right out and tell her, or let her remember on her own?"

"Excuse me?" She said absently.

"Lady, are you listening to me? I've been talkin' to ya for the last five minutes! You can't tell me ya didn't hear me, cuz everyone hears me!" Nick complained, exasperated as he dragged the chair from his wife's bedside and plopped down on it. He sat across from the doctor.

"Yes, of course. You must try to let her remember by herself. I understand you didn't have that luxury when she came home since she asked why Carol wasn't part of the family gathering. Still, I'm sure you can keep a tighter rein on the rest of the information until she's ready to remember."

"She remembers nothing of the kidnapping or the fire. I purposely took her the long way around so we wouldn't see her father's house, or at least what's left of it." Nick crossed his leg to rest a booted ankle on his knee.

"Does she ever go to her father's house?"

"No, never. Not since, well, she wouldn't go there at all. Too many bad memories."

"Bad memories?"

"Her father was killed in that house. She witnessed it."

"I'm sorry. I hadn't realized that. It must have been a terrible experience for her."

Nick blew out a heavy sigh. "You have no idea."

"How did he die?" Nick was staring at end of his boot and didn't hear her question. He was reliving that awful day in his mind when Laura was forced to kill her own father by Johnny Ray, and later when she willfully killed the murderer before Nick's very eyes. From that day to this, no one knew what had really transpired in her father's house but Nick and his wife.

"Nick? Now who's not listening?" She gave him a slight smile.

"Huh? What?"

"I asked you how did her father die? You said she witnessed it."

"A murderer killed him. Would of killed her too if I didn't stop him."

"You stopped him?"

"Yeah. I stopped him. I had to."

"I see," she stared intently at her hands.

"I want you to understand something, Doc. There's nothing I wouldn't do for that woman, nothing. That's how much she means to me. So I need you to stick around. You told me before I brought her home that she needs to stay calm for the baby's sake, and I need to have you help me do that." Nick spoke as sincerely as he could.

"You have my word. I'll collect my things in the morning after breakfast."

* * * *

"I said, come here! Are you deaf?! I said come here!"

"Let go of me!"

"You need to be taught manners! I'm going to teach you a lesson you won't soon forget!"

"No! Please! I'm begging you! Please don't!"

* * * *

Nick was awakened from his own fitful sleep by the thrashing and crying of his wife. He tried to gently shake her awake. He was groggy. It had taken him hours to finally fall asleep himself, worry for Laura and the baby plaguing him every time he closed his eyes.

"Laura! Wake up, you're dreaming!" He now had her sitting up in the bed, his hands firmly holding her by the arms.

"What?" Her eyes finally focused on his.

"You were dreaming. Are you alright?"

"Oh thank God!" She threw herself into his embrace. He stroked her sweat soaked blonde hair.

"That must have been one helluva dream. Wanna tell me about it?" He looked down into her eyes, but she shook her head and cradled herself in his arms again. "Fine, no need to talk about it. It's all over anyway. You're home safe and that's what counts now."

"What time is it?"

"A little after one." She pulled away from his embrace.

"Nick, I need to take a bath."

"Now?"

"Yes now. I need to take a bath. Please, Nick."

"But the cast on your leg."

'I can leave it out of the water. You can help me. Aggie and I did it at her place. It's not hard."

"Alright, I'll run the water for you."

"Make sure it's hot, please, Nick. I need to have it as hot as possible."

Nick shook his head and told her he would do what he could.

His mother met him outside the room. "Nick, what's going on? I heard the commotion. Is Laura alright?"

"She had a nightmare. Now she wants to take bath."

"A bath? At this time of night? I'm going in to talk to her." Victoria knocked on the door as she peeked her head in. "Laura, may I come in?" She didn't wait for an answer when she heard sobbing. She sat next to her daughter-in-law who was softly crying into her pillow. "Oh my goodness, what is wrong?"

"Don't tell Nick, please. He'll be angry. I just know he will." She sat up and let Victoria embrace her.

"Nonsense. Nick could never be angry with you." She gave her a comforting squeeze.

"I don't think it was a dream, Victoria. I think it really happened! Nick is going to hate me! I just know it!"

"He won't hate you, I promise. Tell me what you think happened."

"I was naked, and he kept staring at me. I remember being so cold. The water was freezing, I

had-" She began to sob as Victoria tightened her embrace.

"Who stared at you?"

"I only remember his eyes. He had cold blue eyes. Nick's going to hate me! I just know it!"

"Never. Don't believe such things." Victoria rubbed her arm in comfort. Nick walked in.

"Hey, what's going on here? Why are you crying? Laura?"

Victoria stood and Nick took her place. Laura continued to sob into his chest. "I'm so ashamed, Nick. I can't tell you. I just can't!" Nick searched his mother's face for answers, but she just shook her head.

"Come on, the bath is ready, nice and warm for you."

"Why don't I come help you?" Victoria offered. Nick picked up his wife and Victoria followed them to the water closet.

Part 30

Victoria sat alone at the breakfast table speaking to Silas who stood dutifully by her side.

"I just did like always, Miz Barkley. I brought up Miz Nick's coffee, but Mr. Nick says they's still sleepin' and wont's be down for breakfast."

"I know that neither slept very well last night. They'll eat later. Both of them could use the rest."

"Yes, Miz Barkley," Silas nodded and left the room as Jarrod walked in. He kissed his mother on the forehead.

"Morning, Mother. Sleep well?" he asked as he took his usual seat at the table.

"Not very, I'm afraid Laura had a difficult night, and I stayed up to help Nick with her."

"I'm sorry to hear that. Are they sleeping now?"

"Yes."

Agatha walked in at that moment. "Good morning, sorry to be late."

"Not at all, please take that seat, Agatha." Victoria greeted her and pointed to Jarrod's left.

"Did you have difficulty sleeping as well, Doctor?" Jarrod inquired as he placed his napkin on his lap and poured orange juice into her glass, and then his own.

"No, of course not. Why would I?" In truth she had tossed and turned all night at the thought of Jarrod in the room next to hers. She had sat up in bed listening to him moving about. The doctor had tried to focus on a reading book she found in the room, but the handsome lawyer's closeness was more than she could handle. She hated that weakness in herself. 'My God, he's a recent widower and I'm having thoughts about him that I haven't any right to have!'

"Well," Jarrod interrupted her thoughts. "I just thought you might be tending to your patient last night. That is the reason you're here, after all."

Victoria gave her son a reproving look, then turned her attentions to the young woman.

"Laura was up last night. She was quite restless. I'm so glad we didn't disturb you, Agatha. You've done so much for this family already. Jarrod is going into town, and he would be most happy to escort you there to collect your things. Won't you, Jarrod?" Jarrod knew better than to deny his mother when she used that stern tone of voice.

"Of course, most happy." Jarrod bowed his head, showing more interest in his breakfast than having another go around with the ladies present.

"Thank you. I have crutches that I want Laura to learn how to use once her strength comes back. I fear she will tire of the cane chair soon enough. I will need the carriage to transport them, as well as my belongings."

"Well, I was going to take my own mount in. I will have Ciego drive the carriage for you." Jarrod said between sips of his coffee.

"That's quite unnecessary, Mr. Barkley. I am quite capable of handling the reins of a carriage." The doctor had refused to look up from her breakfast plate.

"As you wish, Doctor James." Victoria eyed the two of them, taking note of their stiff formality with one another.

Heath walked in with a smile on his face. He wiped his hands with a rag then replaced it in his back pocket. He had already spent the better part of the morning working. He leaned down and gave his mother a kiss.

"Morning Mother! How's everyone this fine morning?"

"Morning Heath. Would you like some orange juice?" Victoria asked.

"No thanks, had some at home. Just coffee for me." He acknowledged the others at the table with a nod. "Where's Nick?"

"Sleeping," Jarrod replied.

"What's wrong?" Heath knew Nick would never sleep so late in the morning unless he was ill.

"Laura had a bad night last night," Victoria answered. "I'm sure he'll be up soon. Do you need him for anything?"

"No, just thought he'd wanted to talk about the day. I'll see him later, I expect. How are you doing this morning, Aggie?"

"Well, thank you, Heath."

"How are the twins? Is Leah feeling better with her teething?" the proud grandmother asked.

"Better today. Hope made up some remedy to give her comfort. Good thing too, cuz Michael's starting to kick up a fuss. Hope will be over later to look in on Laura after the twins have their naps."

"She'll enjoy her company."

Nick walked into the dining room rubbing the sleep from his eyes. "Morning."

"Morning. Heard ya had a rough night," Heath stated as his brother took a seat across from him.

"Aw, you don't know the half of it. Aggie, you have to go up and see Laura. I don't know what to do with her. She's all weepy, and I can't get her to stop."

"Oh the poor dear," Victoria sympathized. Agatha stood immediately.

"I'll get my medical bag. I think I'll put Laura on bed rest today." She left the room.

Heath poured a cup of coffee for his brother and pushed the cup in front of him. "Maybe she's all weepy 'cause she's in a family way, Nick."

"Thanks," Nick said, clutching the coffee cup gratefully in his hands. "Ah, I don't know. I think it's something else. She was tossing and turning all night, and then she woke up in the middle of the night and insisted she wanted a bath. Couldn't talk her out of it. She calmed down after that, and I thought she would sleep pretty good, but then morning came and she woke up crying again. I don't know what to do for her. She won't tell me what's wrong."

"I'm sure Doctor James can sort it out," Victoria assured him.

* * * * * * * *

She stood outside the door and heard weeping. "Laura, may I come in?" Not hearing an answer other than more crying, Agatha carefully stepped in. "Laura?" The doctor found her sobbing into her pillow. She moved toward the bed, set her medical bag on the nightstand and opened it up. "Laura, please understand, you must keep calm. It's not good for the baby." Agatha took her wrist, feeling for the pulse as she timed the beats with her watch. "Laura, you're agitating yourself. You must calm down. Your pulse is racing. I'm going to give you something to relax you."

Laura raised her head up from the pillow and looked up at her doctor. "I'm sorry, Aggie, but I can't help it."

"Laura, you're going to have to help it. I won't have you endangering this child." She searched in her leather bag for a syringe.

"I don't want anything to make me sleep. I want to remember what happened. All night long I've been having horrible dreams. Images that keep coming into my head and I don't know what they mean."

Agatha placed the syringe back in her bag, pulled a chair over to the bed, and sat down.

"Very well, why don't you tell me about these images, then maybe we can rid you of them."

"I'm in a black hole, or a room, and it's damp. I feel very cold, and I see blue eyes in a burlap mask and I'm terrified. After, I'm standing in cold water and I'm naked." Laura began to sob again, "It's too horrible to remember!"

"Laura please, you must calm down, or I will-"

"He touched me!" Laura cried out.

"Who?"

"The blue eyes in the mask. He touched me!"

"No, Laura, I examined you. There was no sign of rape."

"NO! I don't mean that way! Damn it, Aggie! He touched me! With his hand, he touched me. I know he did!

"Did he pen-. Were you touched indecently?"

"Yes! Please don't tell Nick! He'll go mad!" Laura's eyes were red and swollen and renewed tears raced down her cheeks.

"Laura, I thoroughly examined you. I didn't find anything that would indicate-"

"The other man with the gun stopped him before he could go further. I'm so ashamed to have let another man touch me! Nick would never forgive me. I should have stopped him!"

"How can any woman stop a man? He was much stronger than you. He would be impossible to stop." Agatha assured her.

"You don't understand. He threatened to kill me. I-, I should have let him!" Laura buried her face in the pillow again.

Agatha moved out of her seat and crouched down by the bed. She pulled Laura up into an embrace as she sat on the bed. "I can't believe Nick would prefer to be a widower than to have you by his side."

Laura's tears wet the front of the woman's dress. "I'm so ashamed of myself!"

Neither woman noticed the bedroom door ajar, or Nick in a braced stance with feet apart, listening to every word. His jaw was clenched, and the cords in his neck pulsated to the beat of his racing heart. Nick's fists were tightened at his sides in a white knuckled grip.

"Get out, Doctor James." Nick's voice was chillingly calm.

Both women stared at him. Agatha stood and quickly left the room, shutting the door. Laura blinked back hot tears. She couldn't remember ever seeing that particular expression on Nick's face before, but instead of fear she felt strangely calm. Their eyes were locked on each other. Neither one looked away. Finally Nick spoke.

"Don't you dare ever think I would prefer to be without you, for any reason!" Nick moved so quickly into the room that she didn't have a chance to speak. He knelt at the side of the bed and grabbed her shoulders, pulling her against his chest, and slamming his mouth onto hers. His kiss was savagely possessive as his tongue entered and reclaimed her. Laura eagerly responded as she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer.

* * * * * * * *

Later that same day in Stockton:

Agatha quickly sorted through her belongings, eager to get packed and return to the ranch to check on her patient. She took care to make sure the door to the office was locked and the sign on it showed "closed". Not that it really mattered. Nick Barkley had been right. All her patients were at the ranch. Very few patients had cast a shadow on her office floor except the sheriff, and he only wanted her to look in on one of the prisoners at the jail. There was a knock on the private quarters of the doctor's office. When Agatha opened the door she found a small brown-haired, freckled face boy with a yellow paper in his hand. He shyly held it up to her.

"Yes, young man? What is it?"

"For you, Ma'am, from the lawyer."

Agatha took the folded paper, then turned to get her change purse, but the boy ran off. "Young man, wait! Don't you want to get paid?"

"Lawyer did it!" he called over his shoulder as he ran to join his friends at play in the alley behind the buildings. Agatha opened the note and found the fine hand of Jarrod Barkley written there.

'Doctor James,

I have been unavoidably detained. Please meet me at my office.

J .T. Barkley'

The doctor read the note, but before she placed it in her pocket, she touched her finger to the signature. She had never received a note from a man before, other than her father, wishing her well in her new practice in Stockton, but also adding that if need be, she would be welcomed back home in Seattle since he was soon to retire and the town was in need of a doctor. Her father assured her the town would accept her since she was his daughter. Agatha shook away her idle thoughts and gathered up the last of her possessions into a valise.

* * * * * * * *

Jarrod greeted Sheriff Madden as he walked in, hat in hand. "Well, Fred, to what do I owe this honor? Business or pleasure?" The lawyer stood from his desk and made a gesture toward one of the chairs, inviting the older man to sit.

"Business, I'm afraid, Jarrod. I know you're still in mourning, and I am very sorry about that, but I couldn't wait any longer."

"That's perfectly all right, Sheriff. What's on your mind?" Jarrod leaned back on the edge of his desk and tucked his thumbs into his vest pockets. The sheriff scratched the back of his head, taking his time to find the right words.

"I talked to Judge Williams today."

"How is old Hang'em Hannibal?"

"He's getting antsy. He's been hounding me to get on with this."

"What is it, Fred? There's obviously something bothering you." The sheriff stood from the chair and began to pace the area in front of the desk.

"I didn't want to bother you with this, Jarrod, but the Judge insisted, and in all fairness, I had to agree with him. With you resigning as County Prosecutor, and Browne dead, well, we don't have anyone else."

"I am not going to become a prosecutor again, I don't care what the judge says. Now that-." He hesitated as his mind once again filled with thoughts of his wife, Carol. "Well, in any event, I'm opening up my law practice again, so I'm afraid Judge Williams will have to find another attorney."

"Oh, he has. Phil Archer. Judge Williams gave him the position after you resigned; temporary of course, until he receives the Attorney General's approval."

"Phil Archer, well, I'm sure he's quite pleased to have his old job back. I thought he opened an office in Lathrop?" Jarrod asked.

"He closed it when Judge Williams offered him the job here," the sheriff added. "But that's not what I came here to talk about. It's Sally Driscoll. She needs a defense attorney. No one will take up her case, just the same as before."

"No one except my Carol, which is why she's-" Jarrod straightened, turned his back on his friend and walked slowly to the chair behind the rich oak desk. He pulled out a handkerchief from his breast pocket and wiped his moist eyes. The sheriff let out an audible sigh and studied the tip of his boots. Jarrod stared out of his office window remembering the day that he and Carol stood in front of it and admired the new lettering.

* * * * * * * *

Jarrod and Carol Barkley both stood at the edge of the sidewalk and admired the newly painted gold lettering.

BARKLEY & HOLISTER LAW OFFICES

STOCKTON and SAN FRANCISCO

"Well now, Counselor Holister, what say you?"

C.B. Holister leaned on one leg and tapped her finger on her chin. She closed an eye and cocked her head to the side. Jarrod couldn't help keeping a wry smile from developing on his face as he watched her studious pose.

"Well?" he asked again.

"Hmm, I suppose it will do." Carol didn't move from her position.

"Will do? What do you mean, will do? Isn't it what you wanted? What we talked about?"

"Yes J.T., of course, but we may want to change it one day. To improve it." She placed her hands on her hips and looked him square in the eye.

"Improve it? How?"

"Why Holister and Barkley, of course." Carol gave him a saucy wink and rushed into the

office building. Jarrod laughed and quickly chased after her.

* * * * * * * *

"I'll do it." Jarrod said, without turning to face the sheriff.

"Do what?" the sheriff asked, puzzled.

"I'll defend Sally Driscoll."

To be continued…