Ghosts in the Smoke Part 21

Disclaimer: I don't own these lovely characters, Aaron Sorkin and his friends do.

Sam and Josh are caught in a hotel fire.

Spoilers: Everything up through The Leadership Breakfast (set two days later)

Archive: Anywhere you want, just please e-mail me Partnrpal@aol.com

Ghosts in the Smoke

By Mer

Part 21

Georgetown Hospital-Sam’s Room

“Hey Sam, I know that you are asleep but I need to get some things off of my chest and I figured that you wouldn’t mind it too much if I told them to you.” C.J. began as she sat next to Sam’s sleeping form.

C.J. glanced nervously around the room. So much had happened in the past few hours that it felt like a lifetime had gone by. But as she glanced down at her watch she realized that it had only been five hours. It had only been five hours since Sam and Josh’s lives were almost lost. She shook her head because that didn’t seem right at all. She felt like she had aged at least five years in those five hours.

“You know Sam if you wanted to scare the hell out of me it worked like a charm, consider me scared. I was so worried about you. I love you like a little brother and even though I don’t always tell you that, I’m glad to have you around.” C.J. said her voice cracking a little bit.

She touched Sam’s head and she smoothed a piece of hair out of his face. She knew that he would be mad if it were out of place. He was always tidy like that. She let her hand linger on his forehead for a moment before taking it away and placing it back in her lap. It just killed her to see Sam like that. Though she realized she never paid that close of attention to Sam’s facial features before, she swore that he looked like he had just been to hell and back.

“Oh Sam, I have no idea what you went through tonight, but I know that it must have been pretty bad. I don’t envy you one bit. But I will talk to you about it once you are able if you want. Unlike, Toby though I’m not going to force myself on you. But please don’t be afraid to talk to me just because I am the press secretary. I promise you that I will not tell them anything other than what they already know.” C.J. whispered.

Tears that she had been fighting to hold back all night began to fall. She brushed them away without giving them much thought. But she only allowed herself to cry for a few minutes. She had promised herself that she wasn’t going to cry and that she was going to be strong.

“You know, I don’t even know why I’m so worried, I mean it’s not the first time that you’ve ever seen me cry. You were there for me a few months ago when everything with Josh caught up to me after one of my many briefings about the shooting. And you just stood there with your arms around me and you let me cry without saying a word. I never told you but that meant a lot to me. Especially, when later I figured out you were the one to have saved my life. When I had asked you earlier that night you said that you didn’t know, because I think you were too upset that even though you had rescued me you hadn’t been able to rescue Josh.” C.J. said and her voice got really soft.

It suddenly occurred to her why he was being so weird about seeing Josh. He hadn’t been able to save Josh that night and he was probably blaming himself for not being able to save Josh again. C.J. patted Sam’s hand as she remembered the pact that they had all made the night before Josh was to meet with Stanley. They gathered in Toby’s office and the three of them vowed not to let one of their own slip away like that again. She figured that Sam must have thought that he was already breaking the few week old vow.

“Oh Sam, everything is going to be alright. Josh should be out of surgery in a few minutes. Everything is going to be fine. We got through the shooting and we can get through this too.” She soothed.

C.J. thought back to a conversation that she had, had with Sam after hearing Josh’s PTSD diagnosis. They had gone to a bar to drown in their sorrows and to figure out how to help him. Sam had told her that they needed to start doing some of the things that they had vowed after the shooting. They needed to start telling each other how they felt. They needed to start crying on each other’s shoulders so that their burdens wouldn’t be as bad to carry alone.

“Sam, I guess you were right. I broke another vow tonight. I should’ve told you a long time ago how much you mean to me. You saved my life and though we joked about it once we’ve never really talked about it again. I thank you so much Samuel Norman Seaborn. I thank you so much for saving me that night and I thank you so much for hanging on when you were trapped in a fire. Just hang in there a little bit longer. I’m going to help you carry your load if you’ll let me.” C.J. declared as the tears began to fall again, only this time she didn’t brush them away.

“I only wish you were awake to hear this yourself. You must think that I am some kind of coward or something. Sam please don’t blame yourself for this. Please don’t put yourself through that torture. Please let me help you. I know that you are asleep right now, but let me help you once you wake up. You didn’t fail Josh. You didn’t fail Josh.” C.J. said through her tears.

C.J. knew that the only way that Josh would consider Sam to have failed was if Sam were to have died in that fire. But Sam hadn’t died in the fire. She just needed to make Sam see that everything was going to work itself out. He just had to give it a little bit of a chance first.

“Sam the only way you could fail is to stop fighting. Please keep fighting for us. Please.” C.J. pleaded with her sleeping friend.

Georgetown Hospital-Recovery Room

Like another scene reminiscent of a few months earlier Leo and Jed stood around Josh’s hospital bed waiting for him to wake up. Donna had begged to be included but Abbey didn’t think that she was ready to yet. Abbey had taken Donna down to the cafeteria in hopes of trying to get her to eat something. Jed promised her that she would be the first one he saw once Josh was moved into a regular room. Abbey shot him the dagger eyes, but simply nodded after seeing the spark of hope on Donna’s face.

“He looks like death warmed over.” Jed commented softly after they had entered Josh’s room.

“Poor kid has been through so much, it’s a wonder that he’s still alive at all.” Leo murmured in reply.

They inched closer to the bed and they sat down in two chairs that had been placed on either side. The doctors weren’t too thrilled about him having visitors so soon, but who is really going to say no to the President of the United States? So Jed and Leo were allowed in with strict instructions to let the antiseptic wear off and not to wind him up any if he woke up. There seemed to be a funny empathies on if he woke up, which worried both of them.

“What did they mean by if he woke up?” Jed asked after they had sat down.

““You do realize that he almost died on the operating table right?” Leo asked.

“Yes, but he’s not ready to give up yet.” Jed replied as he squeezed Josh’s hand.

Leo just nodded and the two of them looked closely at Josh. His shoulder was tightly bandaged, so that he wouldn’t be able to move his arm. A bandage was also wrapped around his head due to that nasty head wound he had received. He looked extremely pale. Also on his skin they could see small traces of ashes just like they could on Sam.

“He just has to wake up.” Leo replied looking straight into Josh’s closed eyes as he said that.

“And not just for Sam’s sake either.” Jed replied looking at Leo.

“What? So I let you take credit for being Josh’s father figure earlier but that doesn’t mean I agreed with it.” Leo protested.

“Calm down. Leo, you need to relax unless you want Abbey on your back too.” Jed replied trying to soften his friend up.

“How can I relax? He might not even wake up? They aren’t sure about any brain damage that he received and the fact that his body went into shock for the second time in less than six months can’t be a good sign either. And Sam, oh God what did I do to him?” Leo moaned.

“Sam is going to be fine.” Jed calmly assured.

“Yeah as long as Josh is.” Leo retorted.

“Leo, seriously Sam’s going to be fine. He’s just delirious right now. Once his infection goes away he will be fine.” Jed lied.

“The possibly of him losing his leg and the fact that he wants to kill himself doesn’t exactly bode well for that happy scenario.” Leo replied.

“I don’t know how serious he was about that. I doubt that he’s really in a state to really make that decision let alone go through with it. And they are working to make sure he keeps his leg.” Jed reassured.

A sound from the bed made them look back over at Josh. He was saying Donna’s name very strangely. Leo realized that he was having some sort of a nightmare. He gently rubbed his hand and whispered soothing words as Josh got more and more agitated. A few minutes later the nightmare passed and Josh was quiet again.

“Well, I guess we can put our worries about him not waking up away. He was talking, even though it was in nightmare form, but he was still talking.” Jed pointed out.

“He was having a nightmare about Donna.” Leo explained.

“I know, that’s because he’s in love.” Jed commented matter-of-factly.

“Oh really. Did I miss his girlfriend come in? I would love to meet her.” Leo replied sarcastically.

“No, I don’t mean he’s in love with just anyone. I mean that he is in love with Donna.” Jed replied.

“And since when did you and Josh start having heart to heart conversations about his love life?” Leo asked with raised eye brows.

“We didn’t, but they are both sending signals at each other, the other is to blind to see. I think it started awhile ago but it deepened after the shooting. He just doesn’t realize it yet.” Jed replied.

“And what you are going to send her a singing telegram from him to her to let them both know how he feels?” Leo couldn’t help but ask.

“Maybe that wouldn’t be such a bad idea after all. They could both wonder who sent the telegram and think that it is from the other.” Jed replied devilishly.

“Oh and next your going to tell me that Sam needs to hook up with Ainsley or something.” Leo mocked.

“Well actually...” Jed’s voice trailed off.

“May God help us all.” Leo said as he threw his hands in the air.

“In more ways than one.” Jed whispered to himself.

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