This comedy is just plain silly, and although it's a bit overdone in places for my tastes, on the whole, I rather enjoy It.
It starts out with Gabrielle taking a makeshift shower. Xena oversleeps and wakes up cranky. Maybe it has something to do with the way her bangs are styled. What gives? The warrior princess should have bangs! "Oh, the one morning I ask you to wake me up. Just when I've got Zantar where I want him, I go and oversleep. Well, thank you very much!" That's Cranky Xena's yelling at Gabs who isn't around. Renee's singing in the shower leaves something to be desired, but wow, does she have awesome shoulder muscles! That girl is built! The peeper in the bushes reminds me of Kindred Spirits. Gabs is a happy little showerer. If Xena didn't have a long enough rope, how did she drop out of the trees? She used a rope to do it. Gabs tells Xena, "I woke up…I took a bath." Uh…wasn't it a shower? She thinks an animal stole her shirt…"You know, a fashionable beaver." She tells Xena she stole her favorite shirt. It's her ONLY shirt! And she says it's the only shirt that goes with this skirt. Uh…oh…never mind. Zantar keeps trying to get away, and Xena doesn't even blink. I like the way Xena casually douses Joxer with water to wake him up. Check out Xena when there is the explosion in the temple. She whirls around, and it looks as if the Warrior Princess forgot her underwear that day. Watching it in slo mo, I caught a glimpse of a black thong, but it's very hard to see, and covers very little. Gabs is bitching that brown isn't "my color." Xena says she kinda likes it. "It has sort of that rustic appeal to it." She grins the whole time she says it. And Gabs shoots back with "Suitable for you, right?" What did I miss? When Alescia calls Aphrodite her evil fairy godsmother, Xena glares at the goddess like she's guilty. Alescia resembles the actress Missy Gold who was a regular on Benson. Anyone else besides me remember her? Alescia asks if Xena will be her fairy godsmother. "Just for a little while," Xena tells her, with a "You got this close because I let you get this close" gesture. Alescia's parents are genuinely concerned, but still annoying. Alescia has a high pitched annoying Chip and Dale type voice. What's up with Gabs falling out of a tree, right in front of Xena? Since when was she that clumsy? Xena looks annoyed, but asks if she's all right. Seems Gabs is shocked upon hearing about Xena's stepfather. I kinda wondered where he came from too. Xena is being rather snippy with Gabrielle, telling her to tell Alescia a story. "That's what you're good at." Does Gabs invent "once upon a time"? "Tyrella"? Where does that come from? Gabs stepsister is Aphrodite, and Xena is her stepmother! Aphrodite wears Calvinius Kleinius. It's amazing how ugly they made Lucy up as the stepmother! And her feet, blech! When Joxer screams over Xena's feet, Gabrielle doesn't just slap him…she belts him! Xena tells Argo where to go and to "make sure she's seen." Now that's a smart horse! Gabs' Tyrella is a part time psychologist. Aphrodite is definitely attracted to men type people. She tells her fellows "If you can't take the heat, Boys, then stay out of my kitchen." The line doesn't work as well as Xena's in Heart of Darkness, but still, it's a good one! Delia, who is Xena as Aphrodite's stepsister, is "dry as a lizard". Do I want to know? She doesn't sit very ladylike. Aphrodite's Tyrella is Gabrielle in a horrible caricature of all things ugly. Delia kills me: "The prince. I knew he couldn't stay away from me forevah." Aphrodite is the mom. Why doesn't she look any older? Yay! Xena gets to dance to the three naked go go Gabrielle music! Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE seems to enjoy her dance. Love it when Delia holds the L up to her forehead with a "Lo-oser." Xena volunteers to cook; and then doesn't know where anything is. Aphrodite says "Scratch my back and I'll scratch yours…Stop it! You know what I mean" to Zantar's men, who obviously have their own vision. Joxer becomes Tyro in his story. Tyro thought his pants might be a little long in the CRO-O-TCH. When he's released, there's the sound of leaking air. Xena's hands ALWAYS have to be doing something…sharpening her sword, messing with her gauntlet, etc. Now she is laying waste to a huge blade of grass. She tells Gabs, "No, I'm not much of a storyteller. I'm more of a woman of action." Tyro's fairy godsmother was Xena. She's "Harmonia". She sounds a bit like Xena though when she says, "Trust me, you'll have many skills." She has a soft British accent. Gabs is pretty cranky. "What do you want from me? My skirt? My boots? My underwear?" Xena retorts with "No, that would be too cruel." Joxer looks rather dashing at the ball. One of the men at the ball asks, "Who's the new guy?" Zantar answers, "I dunno, but check out his social skills." Disco? And Ted does it with an almost straight face! Gabs and that long hair seem to appreciate him. Then they break into some really bad 1950's musical production. Renee doesn't even bother to lip-synch convincingly. Harmonia gives Tyro an hourglass wrist watch? With all those dance moves? Xena blames Gabs for letting Alescia run away. Xena does seem awfully hard on Gabs in this one. One kiss from Aphrodite, and Joxer is out like a light. Why doesn't Alescia answer Xena when she's searching for her? Xena never would have known she was down there if she hadn't stepped on a vine and felt it moving beneath her feet. But Alescia was whimpering a lot. Shouldn't Xena have heard that? She asks the girl why she ran away. Alescia answers, "Have you ever heard Joxer tell a story?" That makes Xena laugh a bit with a "You've got a good point", then tries to explain the merits of fairy tales. Then she picks Alescia up on her back and they head back to camp. Xena is SO gentle with Alescia. How WAS Gabs supposed to know the old woman was Aphrodite? There were no clues. Xena's Tyrella dresses just like…Xena. Alescia says Tyrella should be wearing a dress. Aren't Xena's leathers a dress? Xena's Tyrella is very brief and to the point. She checks out the prince (isn't he supposed to be Tyro?) with mild curiosity. Xena's Tyrella is by far my favorite. Ain't that a shocker? Xena talks about a happy ending. "That's something that I'll get…or I won't get…all by my own self. So I suggest you peddle that shoe elsewhere." She prods the prince out the door with a sword point in his butt, making the "blinky" sound from Vanishing Act. Gabs is Xena's "fairy godsister". But Gabs ain't amused, "After all we've been through, that's what you think of me-the fairy godsister of dishes?" Uh…Excuse me? But what did Gabs make Xena in her Tyrella story…the hideous ugly Evil Stepmother. Seems to me that Gabs got off easily. Xena's monologue when Gabs takes off…"Gabrielle!…She'll be back…she does this all the time…right Joxer? She's just crazy…Gabrielle?" Her confidence is gone by the end. Alescia asks, "This isn't going to have a happy ending, is it?" Xena's answering look confirms it. Xena is extraordinarily warm with Alescia's family. She holds the queen's hand, as she takes her and Alescia to the closet. "And I want you to talk…that's an order from your fairy godsmother." The king wants to know what she's doing. "Just leave them in there to talk. A few days ought to do it." Yeah, or kill them! Did Gabrielle go to Aphrodite on her own? Joxer tells Xena, "I'm your comrade at arms…I'm your wingman. Look, you're the Comet, and I'm your Ajax. You're the Achilles, and I'm your heel." I regret to say that I've watched this episode probably ten times, and I just NOW got the Comet/Ajax joke. Ajax was a mythological figure. Comet wasn't. Amazing how slow I can be, isn't it? Xena just takes in the demonstration of his prowess with one of her sneers. Alescia's crying is way too fake. "Nice plan…if I cared," Xena bluffs the bad guys. Xena won't just lie and say they live happily ever after. Xena's uncharacteristically mushy at the end. She knows Aphrodite really cared. And when Gabs gives her sweet families stick together speech, Xena puts an arm around her. After Alescia hugs her parents, Xena hugs Joxer and Gabbers with a long embarrassed "Awww…" Gabs holds on tight to Xena's waist during it. Gabs came up with the story of Pinocchio! Joxer wanted to change it to a monkey "with a wooden tail". I dunno why, but it seems odd to see Xena turn around and wave at Alescia. Silly episode, yes, but the message is about family, and I like that! And here are Gary's thoughts:
In the opening scene, we se a naked Gabby taking a shower, with
strategically-placed shrubs around her. She looks cute as she washes up, and
has really well- defined shoulder muscles.
Xena awakens and yells for Gabby...it is the first time Gabby was asked to
get Xena up early. Gabby is the one who can sleep thru anything, so why does
Xena think she will be able to wake Xena up? Meanwhile, Joxer sleeps on.
Xena grabs for a piece of rope, and leaves it. Someone meanwhile steals
Gabby's halter top.
At the thugs' camp, a bad guy, Zantar, plans to steal the crown jewels from a
nearby kingdom. He is just out of jail and has not committed any crimes yet,
but we see Xena jump down from a tree and grab this 300-pound guy and pull
him up into the tree to escape and capture him. He is tied up and led to
Xena's camp.
Gabby says someone stole her favorite shirt...maybe an animal...a
fashionable beaver. Gabby sees her shirt used as a gag on the bad guy and is
mad at Xena for that. Xena says that Gabby has something to wear...it is a
sack. Gabby says she was topless (sigh) and Joxer, still sleeping, smiles.
Did he see her naked?
Gabby punches him later in her anger.
This reminds me of Day in the Life where Xena breaks Gabby's frying pan.
Xena says she ran out of rope...was the halter top used so Xena could use it
instead of rope as a gag? Weird.
There is a blast from Aphrodite's temple. A little girl, Alicia is there and
was messing with Passion, a potion which blows open part of the temple wall.
The girl wants Xena to save her from her evil fairy godsmother...Aph....
Xena glares at that.
The girl's dad is Xena's old friend, who married again after his wife died.
The girl hates her and wants to run away. Xena tells Aph that she will take
the girl home. At the castle, the new mother cries and the father goes out looking for the
girl.
Gabby scouts ahead for Xena...even climbing a tree and falling, but is
unhurt. Xena does not seem to notice and asks if she saw anything...like in
FINS..."any fish down there?"
Xena announces she had a stepfather, which is news to Gabby. Gabby is not
appreciated for her fall and is angry.
Xena tells Alicia that Gabby will tell her a story as she scouts ahead.
Gabby's story: She is Tyrella, an overworked farm girl. Xena is the step-mom
and Aph is the step-sis. Tyrella swept, did the dishes, cleaned the attic,
worked in the garden, and dug a well. Xena says she neglected her most
important duty...to cut Xena's hideous claw like toenails.
Joxer screams at this, and the girl assures him that it is only a story.
Aph misses the girl and wants to make herself a step-mom.
Xena has Argo go on alone, leading the thugs away from the camp.
Gabby again: She tells Xena and Aph in the fairy tale, that their anger is
misplaced and they avoid their deeper emotions...that is why Xena
disrespects Gabby's possessions...her shirt.
Aph hears this and tells her own story: She is the mom and Xena is a
vamp-like spoiled girl out for catching the prince. She sounds as if she
lived in the Bronx, and when Joxer arrives as a messenger, she curls around
him. They get invited to the ball. Gabby is shown as a toothless hag with
awful hair who giggles like a loon.
Xena stops this story and tells Aph to leave. Gabby shortens the sack she
wears. Xena asks if Gabby is still mad at her. Xena caught some fish for supper and will cook them, but pretends to be inept...cannot find anything in the saddlebags, etc. Gabby says she will do it. Alicia asks who the guys were in Aph's story...Gabby says they were
swimming instructors.
Joxer tells the story as Gabby cooks. He is Tyro, a slave to evil step dad and stepbrother. Meanwhile, Aph stops the thugs and will get them their brother back (seven in all) if they help her get the girl back.
Joxer again: he is given a wedgie and says thanks. He will not go to the
ball because he is told he has no social skills.
Now: Gabby is mad at Xena, who sits there lazily. Gabby tells her to get
some water so Gabby can poach the fish.
Joxer is cleaning the floor and looks up to see an absolutely beautiful Xena
as Harmonia, his fairy godsmother. Her dress and hair are perfect, and her
Kiwi voice is great. She gives him the social skills and clothes, but has a
time limit with the spell. She says he will have "many skills".
Gabby is insulted for the third time. Xena leaves and Gabby asks if she
wants her skirt, boots, or her underwear....Xena, referring to the
underwear, says that would be too cruel.
The Ball: Joxer has a goatee and fancy duds and dances well, but the stunt
double was too apparent. Gabby is beautiful in a nice dress and they dance
together. There is nice music, too. Disco music (ick) starts and Joxer does fancy moves, or his double does. The spell wears off and he leaves with Gabby's shoe.
Joxer is still talking as Xena comes back---the girl is gone. Xena says she
left Gabby in charge and blames Gabby for the girl's disappearance.
Later, with Xena gone, an old lady says she was attacked at the river. Gabby
grabs her staff and runs to fight the bad guys...it is a trick, because the
woman is Aph, who kisses Joxer,, who faints. The thug tells Aph where to
find the girl and is let go.
Alicia hangs by a convenient cloth-covered vine we see all too often. Xena
climbs down and rescues her. The girl ran off because of Joxer's boring
story.
The Camp: Aph took Zantar...Xena blames Gabby again..."where were you?"
Gabby says she tried to help a woman but it was Aph, Xena says. Gabby asks
how was she supposed to know that. Gabby's top is shorter...I notice things
like that..the halter top,too, heh-heh.
Xena now tells a story. She is Tyrella and is sharpening her sword. Joxer
arrives in the story and tells Xena if the shoe fits, she will be wed to the
prince. Xena has two stepsisters and the mother is Zantar dressed as a
woman. Xena looks mean...her dress has a white apron and she tells Joxer that she
does not need anyone for a happy ending...she will or will not have one on
her own.
Gabby is the fairy godsister and offers her help. Xena tells her to do the
dishes.
NOW: Gabby is furious over this, saying Xena thinks of her as a servant. She
stomps off, having had enough...number six insult of the day.
Xena says "she does this all the time." Since when? Xena did look concerned,
so I think there was not a planned thing between Xena and Gabby to make a
fake feud and give the girl an example of what a family does when they
argue.
Castle: The king and queen are tied up. The thugs stole the crown jewels and
are running off. Xena locks the girl and queen in a room so they can
talk...the king is told to just sit there...Xena again taking over no matter
where she is.
Aph's shrine: Gabby knocks over items, saying "clumsy me" until Aph shows up
. Gabby tells her that she was selfish to keep the girl and should leave her
to her parents. Isn't that Love? Gabby asks.
In a wasted scene, Joxer wants to help. An exasperated Xena tells him to
guard the place in case the thugs return...no loot there anymore.
The girl and queen work out their problems as the Big Fight begins. The
thugs capture Joxer as Xena arrives. They all fight, and the fairy-tale
people and live-action people are interposed. Gabby shows up saying "pardon
my dishpan hands." The thug falls and the wig comes off..."it's a man" Joxer
says.....
The ending: The girl gets her happy ending. She now believes her stepmom
loves her and now accepts her. The king and queen and Alicia are one family,
sharing dad's love.
Xena sees Gabby and says,” Gabrielle: why did you come back?"
I thought that a cruel question, since Xena did nothing but insult Gabby
all day. Gabby says to stay together as a family (her and Xena) and work out their
problems, as the girl does.
Was this a pre-planned scene the girls cooked up? I don't think so, and for
Gabby to leave after a few insults, and not leave Xena after the Gabdrag,,
was strange.
Gabby thinks up a story of a wooden boy whose nose grows as he tells a
lie....Joxer says it could be about a monkey....they all hug.
This episode has a combination of real-time and fairy-tale time interposed
as the story progresses.