went to sleep last night thinkin about _him_ and listening to crash into me and i'll come into you... what a sexy song right? holding hands while listening to stranger in the ngiht... _he_ woke me up this morning to tell me he was playing in the rain (how beautiful a sight can that be?)

my momma talkin to me like she tellin me how to live. givin me a lecture about how bad this guy i'm dating is. oh he swears too much and he disrespects his parents and he drives like a bat out of hell and his temper could kill us one day. says it's up to me who i want to date but i know as well as she does that he's out of the picture now. sucks for him. may take time. but mom will keep pressurin me and pressurin me and she MUST know that the most attractive thing is something one can't have. doesn't mean i'm gonna disobey my momma... not this time anyway.

we were watchin dumb and dumber when she called and told me to come home early.

gonna rape that bag of cookies real soon...

feelin like i'm tired of all this poetic shit. feelin like no one deserves to swim in my deep end, sometimes not even me... would i deny myself? almost wishing some stranger in the crowd would chop my hair off as a joke so i could go home and show mom. i love poetry, i love beauty, i can find beauty in almost anything... but sometimes i wanna dye my hair.

is that okay? she asks as her green hair falls over her shoulders...