whoa, still a little woozy... i just woke up. i had this really long dream about being a general or something in the army, and i was saving soldiers left and right... i pulled one out of a river and he disappeared, then some other soldier showed up and started griping at me for something. then the soldier i saved appeared and i told him he could live on disability or something with the letters A and L in it, and he had a cow and took off. then the other soldier took off, all of a sudden i turned and there he was standing like a POW, shoulders staunch, back straight like he had a gun pointed to his head. then i had the image that the enemy was rushing up to my house on the hill and they were going to kill my children.

it was mixed in with a dream i had that involved taking care of my boyfriend's son from a previous marriage. the little boy was so cute and he looked like cory, he even looked like me a little bit and i was telling everyone he was my son but i had the feeling he wasn't, or that i wasn't the one who gave birth to him. we were ice skating and he took my socks.

then i was jumping into a raging river of mud, trying to save this little black girl (or maybe she was mexican, i don't recall).

despite my strenuous efforts to stay asleep until one, i still managed to wake up at ten thirty in the morning.

so today, i begin preparing for a week-long fast. kinda rough thing to do during thanksgiving, but i'll get over it.

i miss cory so much.

countin down the days til i leave for michigan... 28...