ELVIS PRESLEY:
GOOD NEWS & BAD NEWS
The good news first:
ELVIS IS ALIVE!
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NOW, THE BAD NEWS: Elvis was recently fired by Caesar's Palace, where he was working
as an Elvis impersonator.
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YOU CAN HELP: Because
Elvis currently has no income, your donations will be greatly appreciated.
Elvis will accept cash or credit cards ONLY. No personal checks please.
Elvis plans
to open the Blue Suede Dental Assistant School as soon as he has enough financing, which will be as soon as he pays off his gambling debts,
medical debts, drug debts and tailoring/dry cleaning debts. Please
don't delay your generosity.
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Want to read some
REALLY, REALLY BAD JOKES ?
.
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Do NOT check out the
JAR JAR BIGGS -- JOE JOE BINKS page.
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Nor
THE MI AMIGO PAGE (I mean it.)
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Visitors since July 4, 1776: 
Email your sympathy email to:
elvis@hell.com
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Click here to go to the world renowned TOOTHPICK SCULPTURE PAGE If it was really world renowned, do you think they'd stoop to putting a link from this page?
