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This site is updated weekly (if not daily) and reflects the activities of the Corps. Click on the "refresh" button of your browser if you have any problems seeing the updates.
Anything you'd like to submit please see at the bottom of the page.
For the Corps,
Doctor Gonzo
Webmaster, CIC Last Staff With Balls/VMIPC
- Dr. Gonzo
Announcements:
A message from the Emperor:
Justice and equality in the Corps, take a stand...
My opinion on the GC meeting of 11/4/2004.
Another treatise on school policy
A critical view of leadership and respect at VMI
Toleration - VMI, NAZIS, HALLOWEEN, AND A TOLERATING THOSE WHO DID...
This letter is a commentary about what is going on around us and how the Institute is slowly falling apart. We must do what we can to preserve the heritage we have.
Ladies and Gentlemen,
I have here in my hands
Our alma mater’s future plans.
So I beseech thee; Allow me if I may
To present these “idears” so that they
May illustrate my great “super-intent.”
First, I shall dare
To eliminate in pairs
The following items of which you see here:
Freedom and speech;
Polywools and good eats
Equality and winning athletes who care
SRC will be for all
In our new Crozet Hall
But I will not pay for a healthier meal plan.
Breakout Hill I deride
So I’ll destroy it with pride
Just like corps unity and the rat line.
All of these I shall replace
With frowns for each cadet’s face
And more “Dismissals to Number 1’s” we’ll let stand
Bone-deep caring is a must
But the GC, I don’t trust
And self-governance by the corps can be damned!
I will take away their rights
For I am PEAY, full of MIGHT!
My will they shall obey, or despair.
-Anonymous cadet
POLYWOOLS?! YOU BASTARDS! YOU MURDEROUS BASTARDS! YOU BLEW THEM UP! YOU BASTARDS!
Oh yeah, can't forget my help received statement: Help Received - YES, THE CORPS OF VMI, THE COMMANDANT, HIS STAFF, THE EMPEROR HIMSELF, LAUNDRY DEPT, QMD, ARTIE NOEL, JESUS, USAMA BIN LADEN, FUNK MASTA' FLEX...the list goes on so just assume YES.
Tribute to the Staff of this site (The Last Staff With Balls):
Webmaster and primary satirist: Dr. Gonzo
Satirist and Political Commissar of Propaganda: Raoul Duke
Great Thinker 1 and Revolutionary: Poncho Villa
Great Thinker 2 and Voice of Reason: die Uber Mench
Minister of Evil: Vincent Vega
Vice President For Seditionary Acts: Che Guevera
Operations Officer: Private Slemp
Alpha Company Rep.: Jolly Green Giant
Bravo Company Rep.: Tweedle Dee
Charlie Company Rep.: Chucky, Seed Of
Delta Company Rep.: "BGM"
Echo Company Rep.: Dirty Randall
F-Troop Rep.: "IT'S PAT!"
Golf Company Rep.: Teedle Dum
Hotel Company Rep.: -NONE- ALL ON PERMIT
Band Company Rep.: Beat, Blow, Squeeze, Repeat
CEA Rep.: Sexual Harassment Panda
OGA Rep.: Hermann Goering
Animal Services Provided By: Rockbridge County Animal Services
Starring in order of appearance:
General B.H. Peay the III, Son of Hrothgar, Slayer of the beast Grendel, knight of the Roundtable, Presiding Lord of the belt-loopless masses
COL Eric Hutchings, a graduate of the North Korean War College and fluent speaker of Korean
Dr. Gonzo, an ether addicted lawyer from Las Vegas, Nevada.
Raoul Duke, as himself
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Printed on Kodak Film
Any questions, comments, suggestions direct Doctor Gonzo
