The Sad True Story of Herman the Three-Headed Duck
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . by A Blanket
. . . Quaaaaaaaaaack!
. . .
Quack? Qu-ack!
. . .
Quack?!?
. . .
Oh dear...
. . .
What is it?
. . .
Well, I suppose it's some kind of duck.
. . .
Yes, but...
. . .
Look, I don't know any more than you do. All I know is that it's some kind of duck.
. . .
Well, duh. But all the others are normal.
. . . What happened?
. . .
I don't know. Maybe -- who's that?
. . .
Wha--
. . .
Step aside folks, nothing to see here.
. . .
Who are you? What are you doing??
. . .
Hey! Where are you taking him???
. . .
No!! Herman!!!! Heeeermaaaaaaaaan.....!!!
* * *
. . .Herman awoke with a start, only to see the word "allodoxaphobia" inches from his eyes in huge, ominous red letters. Instinctively, he scuttled backward, hitting something hard and unforgiving with a thunk! There he lay, trembling, afraid of the strange message before him, but even more terrified to look away.
. . .
Then, suddenly, the word was gone. Herman blinked to clear his head, feeling his fear drift away.
. . .
He blinked twice more, to clear his other two heads, and a cool calmness began to descend on him.
. . .
Wait a minute...
. . .
What?
. . .
In response to this thought, Herman blinked again.
. . .
Three sets of eyes...
. . .
Herman shrugged. Now was not the time to ponder such things. He decided to take a look around. That shouldn't be too hard.
. . .
Resolutely keeping one pair of eyes on the space that allodoxaphobia, or "doxy," as Herman had come to call it, had just vacated, he turned his other two heads to look behind him. There, he saw several large columns, extending to the floor and to the ceiling above his head. Hitting them with a beak, he deemed them to be made of cold, hard metal, possibly titanium, although how Herman decided that, no one knows.
. . .
Busily examing these strange structures with one head, Herman now turned his remaining head to face his first. They looked at each other. One nudged the other with its beak. The other squawked!
. . .
Startled, they both tried to jump backwards at the same time, resulting in a tangled mess of limbs, two confused heads, and a third head laughing hysterically.
. . .
The first head glared at the third. Herman hit his head with his newly disentangled wing. Ah, much better. His second head resumed its examintaion of the bars by hitting itself against them. That should keep it occupied for a while. The first head chuckled to itself with an evil smile...
* * *
. . .Next time... What happened to Herman? Does he really have three heads? What does "allodoxaphobia" mean? Is one of Herman's heads really evil?
