Disclaimer: No copyright infringement is meant, no profit will be made by the use of Mickey Kostmayer, I have no money, so, please, Universal, don't sue me. This story is meant for fun and I promise that Mickey will be returned, unharmed, when I've finished with him*

*Good thing I don't have to say when *that* will be...

Mickey Kostmayer was a crack Company agent; he was also a lonely agent. He lived in New York City, in a small apartment. It certainly wouldn't be a fit place for a dog. Besides, he was too busy with his missions, and with helping his good friend Robert McCall aka "The Equalizer" to properly look after one. He was finally driven to seek help, and he went down to St. Christina's Church in the Polish section of Brooklyn, to ask his brother for help.

Father Nicholas Kostmayer sat behind his desk, hands neatly folded on top of it. "So what is it you want, Mickey?" he asked. "You've never had much luck with pets before, what kind do you want now? The goldfish you'd tried having died the day after you got them."

Mickey hung his head down. "I know." He had on a blue t-shirt and jeans. He took a deep breath, then looked up. "I was hoping you could suggest something."

"How about a cat?" Nick asked. Mickey rather reminded Nick of one, at times. He certainly had nine lives, that was for sure.

"Ah, they're too fussy," Mickey responded.

A knock on the door interrupted them. A small boy came in, his eyes bloodshot from crying. "What's wrong, Alan?" Nick asked, concerned.

"My mom won't let me keep my pet!" Alan cried, and started sniffling again.

Nick stood up and crossed to the boy, but Mickey had already crouched beside him. "Why not?" Mickey asked quietly, trying to soothe the boy.

"She says he's a lizard and that she's going to put him into the street!" wailed Alan.

Mickey's eyes met Nick's then he asked, "A lizard?"

"I told her, 'Mom, he's not a lizard!' but she wouldn't listen!" Alan wiped his eyes on his shirt sleeve.

"Want us to try to talk to her?" Mickey suggested. He thought that Nick might be able to make the woman see reason.

"No, I ran away from home! I came here looking for sanc... sanc... shelter!" Suddenly, they all heard a scream from outside Nick's door. "Oh no! He must've gotten loose!" Alan flew from the room, and Mickey was only a step behind him when they reached the empty cage.

"What was in here?" asked Mickey but the boy took off. Nick arrived and Mickey asked, "You got any idea what we're looking for?"

"No, but we'd better hurry up. I have a feeling it's not a popular pet," Nick replied.

They split up and searched, then met again in front of Nick's office in an hour. Neither had found anything. "Now what?" Mickey asked.

A scuffle was heard, then the boy was marched back into view, his mother with a firm grasp on his ear. "Now, young man, you will apologize this instant to Father Kostmayer for the commotion you caused!"

For a moment it seemed as though the boy would rebel, then he said, head down, "I'm sorry, Father Kostmayer."

"Now we'll have to try to find a good home for that... that... that... *thing*." the mother said.

Nick spoke up. "Well, as it happens, my brother here is looking for a pet. Isn't that right, Mickey?" Nick took no chances and nudged Mickey.

Mickey hated being put on the spot but agreed, "Yeah, that's right. The least I can do is give it a good home." He wondered what he was letting himself in for.

The boy immediately brightened. "You will?" he asked, looking happier. "Oh, that's great!" The mother had let go of her son's ear, and the boy dashed off then quickly returned. "Here he is, his name is Uzi."

Mickey's lips quirked and he and Nick looked at each other. The young boy held his arm out towards Mickey, and Mickey let the creature crawl on to him. It was an iguana. The boy said goodbye to his pet, and two of them left, leaving Mickey with Nick.

"Uzi, huh? It's fate, Mickey. The Lord moves in mysterious ways," Nick said piously, but his eyes twinkled.

"Yeah, right," Mickey retorted. He put Uzi into the cage then said "I guess I'll give it a try for a while. But if it doesn't work out, you're finding a home for it!"

Mickey walked out, his new pet with him. He muttered, "I think this is goin' to be a beautiful friendship."