"Even Screech man needs nourishment!" - Screech
"I'm Screech. Zack's geeky sidekick." - Screech
"Thanks for letting me share my locker with you Zack!" - Screech
"Gift rap... Isn't that a MC Hammer Christmas song?" - Screech
"The name is Bond. Screech Bond. I have a liscence to love." - Screech
"I'm not allowed out after Alf" - Screech
"Class of 2003, Be kind to geeks, nerds and dweebs. Ten years from now, they'll be the ones with all the money!" - Screech
Screech: Your mom's ugly! Your dad's ugly! AND your dog's ugly!
Needick: Hey! My dog is not ugly!
Screech: That's how I handled my woman!
Zack: What woman?
Screech: The woman I had... before... I handled her... *walks away*
Slater: Working out is the last thing on my mind.
Screech: I hear you blood.
Slater: I hear you blood? Where'd you get that?
Screech: Chapter 3. "Talking Cool"
Zack: Is there a chapter on shutting up?
Screech: Oh, and about sharing lockers, I can't. For health reasons.
Zack: What do you mean 'for health reasons'?
Screech: Slater said he'd kill me.
Zack: We would like to put KKTY back on air.
Mr. Belding: WHAT?!
Screech: We - would - like
Mr. Belding: I heard you!
Lisa: For you, I'm making a friendship muzzle.
Screech: I'm speechless!
Lisa: That's the idea.
Mr. Belding: Do your parents know?
Screech: Of course! She's been over every night.
Mr. Belding: And there's no objections?
Screech: No, they're rooting us on.
Mr. Belding: Well I have objections. You can't elope!
Screech: Who're your calling a cantalope, you melon head?!
Screech: I will be your everything.
Lisa: And I will be gone.
Mr. Belding: Now what is it like on Mars?
Screech: Far out. Here, have a Mars bar!
Slater: Screech! What are you doing?
Screech: Crusin' for chicks.
Slater: In the boy's locker room?
Slater: Do you think I want to end up an overweight, beer bellied laughing stock?
Screech: Well, my mom always said you can be anything you want to be. "There's nothing more romantic than cuddling up with seaweed." - Screech
Lisa: I think there's love in the air. How bout you?
Screech: No, that's my cologne, 'musk of mustang'. Giddy up!
Jessie: Aww... is Slater scared of the wittle awobics instwuctor?
Screech: What's an awobics instwuctor?
Screech: You know, I kissed Lisa for the first time on a bridge.
Zack: When was that?
Lisa: Right before I threw him off.
