((-Nicky and Alex-))

This is my first Backstreet Fairy Tale! Cool, huh?!?! : ) Anyway, I'd like to know what you, the reader, thinks! So send me some feedback, ok? It can be good or bad or a question, whatever. But if you have some bad feedback, go easy on me ok? Don't just tell me "YOU SUCK!" Put it more mildly and tell me WHY you thought it was bad. Alritey then! On with the story!

*Note* This is copyrighted. This story was made by me and no part can be used in any way or form, unless I give you permission. If this gives you inspiration to write your own fairy tale, go ahead, but that doesn't mean copying what I wrote. Alright? Alright!

*PS* There is some... well maybe a LOT of Leighanne bashing and I just wanted to make it clear that I have NEVER met her before, and I really don't have anything against her! It just makes the story funnier, I think! There is also Brittney Spears bashing, and for her, I mean every single word!

Once upon a time, in a small village, lived a poor woodcutter, his two sons, and their step-mother. The father's name was Brian, the step-mother's name was Leighanne and the two children's names were Nicky and Alex.

Although woodcutter Brian worked very hard everyday so his family could be sheltered, fed and everything else, the money he made just wasn't enough. Especailly after the airhead step-mother Leighanne's boob job, the family was really low on dough. (Author's note- I rhymed lol)

Late one night when the children had gone to bed after a dinner of macaroni & cheese, (which was actually just macaroni cuz they couldn't afford the cheese and Leighanne can't cook either way) Leighanne pulled Brian over and said, "Brian, we are low on cash and food and money for me to buy slutty clothes!"

"I'm sorry dear, but I am trying my best!" Brian replied. "Trust me, I'm trying my best cuz maybe if I had more money I could get the hell away form you," he muttered.

"What was that?"

"Oh nothing dear!"

"Hey, I have an idea! Why don't you take the children deep into the woods and leave them there! That will cut down on our costs, leaving me money to buy clothes that are five sizes too small!"

"No! You are talking about my kids here! what kind of a father would I be?!"

"Hey! You'd still have Tyke!" said Leighanne.

"Good point...but still!" said Brian.

"Come on! If you do it, I;ll give you a real special treat tonight..." said Leighanne, unbuttoning the collar of his shirt. Brian, being the man he was, well actually just being a man, couldn't resist Leighanne's seducing.

"Alright, alright..." he said and they proceeded to their room. What they didn't know though, was that AJ, who was on his way to sneaking out that night, overheard the whole thing!

"What a lil' *%$!#!!" he said as he climbed out the window. "I better remember to tell fatso, I mean Nicky about this later!" he said to himself. But unfortunetly, by the time he came home, he was stoned as hell and forgot all about what he had to tell fa- I mean Nicky.

=Next Morning=

"Come here kid," called Brian. Little Alex and little Nicky came running from their rooms.

"What is it Dad?" asked Alex.

"Is breakfast ready?" asked Nicky.

"Well, today I am taking you guys for a walk in the woods! Would you like that?"

"Sure," replied Alex.

"But I'm hungrrrrry!" whined Nicky.

"I'm not done yet, Nickerdoodles! When we get there, I'll make a fire and you can have your breakfast there, alrite?"

Nicky smiled. "Ok, daddy."

So they started their walk into the woods.

"I'm hungry!" cried Nicky two steps out the door.

I better feed him or else he'll never stop whining, thought Brian.

Feed him dad, please so he'll shut the @#$% up! Thought Alex.

"Alrite...here's a box of twinkies." said Brian, digging throught the backpack he had brought.

"Yey!!!" cried Nicky, grabbing the box.

And on they went, with lil' Nicky leaving a trail of twinkie wrappers behind.

Finally, they got to the middle of the woods, where Brian built a fire and gave them some bread and ham.

"I'm going to get some more wood. You guys stay here, ok?"

"Ok dad."

"And you guys?"

"Yea?"

"I love you both very much."

"Luv ya too Dad." said Alex.

"Muv yomph too." said Nicky finishing his fod.

And with that, Brian left, with a heavy heart, thinking he'd never see his children again.

=8 Hours Later=

"Alex, it's getting dark! Nicky's getting scared!"

It's ok Nicky. Just shut up, get up and let's try to find a way home." Alex said, suddnely remembering what he had overheard. No use telling Nicky though, he thought, and started to walk.

"I'm hungry!" cried Nicky. Alex was about to sock him when Nicky said, "Hey look! Someone has twinkies! They left their wrapper there! Hey! There's another one!! Maybe if we follow 'e,, we'll find food!"

"Those wrappers were the ones YOU left behind stupid! But if we follow 'em we might get home! Let's go." said Alex. Nicky must take after Leighanne, he thought.

But Alex was right about the wrappers and 30 minutes later, they arrived at home and knocked on the door.

"Boys!" cried Brian gathering them up in a hug.

Their step-mother came out to see what the commotion was about.

"Boys..." she also said.

That night, Leighanne tried to get Bri to try again.

"No way!" said Brian putting his foot down this time.

"You...suck!" cried Leighanne and left hte room. "Actually you do...literally." said Brian.

=Next Morning=

"Hey...what are their names?...Kids! Come on! I'm gonna take you for a walk!" cried Leighanne after Brian left to work. Yup. That's right. You know exactly what she is gonna do now!

"I'm hungry!" said Nicky.

"Umm...here, have some cheerios." she said and gave him a box.

"Mmm!!"

So off they went, into the woods, with Nicky dropping cheerios on the way. They don't call him Messy Marvin for nothing!

Leighanne did exactly what she had told Brian to do, and left them in the woods.

"Hey!" Alex said, 5 hours later. "We can folloe your trail of cheerios home!" He hadn't been hung over that day, so Alex was thinking pretty good. But there was some bad news. Some birds had seen this cheerios and eaten them up as Nicky, Alex and Leighanne had been walking. So they ended up walking deeper and deeper into the forrest.

"Alex! I can't walk anymore! I haven't eaten for hours! I am too hungry I-" Nicky stopped in mid-sentence as he saw what he saw. It was a house! Not just ANY house! A house made up of gingerbread with candy windows, icing dripping off the roof, and little gumdrops and peppermints decorating it.

Whatever tiredness Nick was feeling vanished and he ran like mad towards the house.

Alex also saw the house, and he ran towards the white powdery substance he saw covering the fence.

"YUMMY!!!" cried Nicky chewing off the shingles.

"Daymn! This is just powdered sugar!" exclaimed Alex. He headed over to Nicky and started started taking off the gumdrops and eating them.

=An Hour Later=

"I am NOT hungry." said Nicky, sitting on the floor. He had eaten so much he couldn't even get his butt up!

"I'm pretty stuffed too." said Alex, beside him.

"HEY! Whose been eating my house!?!" came a nasty, phlegm-y (Author's Note- can't spell that!) voice from the front foor.

"Whose that?" asked Nicky.

Alex shrugged.

Then an ugly looking witch, wearing a pink tube top and pink miniskirt came around the corner. Her lips were covered in ugly hot pink lipstick and someone should've told her she had WAY too much ugly blush on. Everything was an ugly looking pink.

"You little boys ate a whole side of my house up! You're gonna have to pay for this! I'm Witchney Spears, and no one gets awaay with eating her house up!"

"Well soooooorry you ^&*%$#@(*!" said AJ. "Come on Nicky! Let's go!" But unfortunetly, Nicky was waaay too fat to be going anywhere! AJ tried- he tried REAL hard, and grabbed and pulled Nicky but he would not budge. It was too late. Withcney Spears put shackles on both of them and dragged them with much force, inside her little cottage.

Inside, she threw fat lil' Nicky inside a cage and locked him up. With Alex, she handcuffed him to a pole for the moment.

"You," she said pointing at Alex. "You have to do everything I tell you too or that lil' fatso will be made my boyfriend."

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!" screamed poor little Nicky.

"Fine." said AJ and flicked her off when she turned her back towards him.

That day and night, she made AJ help her fix food, a LOT of food for Nicky and made AJ clean her house and paint her bathroom pink. Why would she be doing that?? He thought.

The next morning, Witchney Spears went to Nicky's cage.

"You are plump enough!" she said.

"Huh?!?"

"You are plump enough to be cooked and eaten!!" she screamed and cackled.

"WAIT! I thought you said you were gonna make him your boyfriend! Not eat him! ANd I've done everything you said!! DUUUUUDE!!!" said Alex.

"I lied. I already HAVE a boyfriend. His name Justin Timberlake but he lives somewhere else. He calls it the "hood"..." said Witchney, a lil' confused. "ANYWAY, I have a new potion I've been working on to make lil' kids into gingerbread people and I think I am gonna have a nice plump one by this afternoon!" (More cackling)

So she started her potion. "Hey you! GO check the oven to see if it's ready!" she screamed to Alex, who she uncuffed.

"Huh?? Where's your oven? How do you check it??" He asked.

"Like this and it's over here!" she yelled.

She stuck her head in while humming some nasty sounding song and started to dance a little when she fell inside! Alex, wanting to be able to hear, closed the oven door and locked it.

"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!" Witchney Spears cried out! And soon her shouting faded.

"Yey!! You saved us Alex!!"

"Thank you, thank you!" he said, as he got the key and let Nicky out of the cage.

"Let's get outta here!" Cried Nicky. "That scarey ugly fat lady was going to eat me!"

On the way out to the door, Nicky tripped on sometihng. "OW!"

"What is it?"

"I dunno. Looks like a big box."

"It's a treasure chest!" AJ opened it and there was money and jewels in there that would definetly make them rich!

"Awww! There's no food in there!" said Nicky disapointed.

AJ shook his head. "Come on help me with it!"

They walked out the door with the HUGE chest between them and on the way out Nicky broke off the door so he wouldn't be hungry on their way home.

They didn't KNOW their way home!

So they wandered around the forrest when they met up with two hunters!

"H...i...I...m...K...e...v...i...n..."

"Hi! I'm Howie D.! We're hunters and we're out here hunting, and stuff like that!"

The kids explained their situation and the two nice, and handsome hunters helped them find hteir way home!

When they got there, Brian opened the door and hey! Leighanne was gone! She ran off with some "homeboy" named Justin. YES! Brian was FREEEE!

The children told their father the story and their father apologized. Then they were introduced to the hunters who had helped them! And lo and behold, Kevin was Brian's long lost cousin!!! So Brian decided to let them move in with them and since he was a woodcutter, he cut some wood and made a bigger house. They were rich, happy and content.

And they lived happily ever after!