Moron update

8/30/99

I just got off the phone with a lawyer in Lansing. We called him to find out whether it was worth it to try to get back the money that the Moron stiffed us. First off, this guy tells me that he didn't call us back because it was long distance. I was a little ticked off at first, but then I realized he knew quite well that we weren't going to pay him for his services, we were just asking his advice. So I got over it.

He said we pretty much got fucked over, sucks doesn't it? He was polite, and really quite nice, but very frank. We got a check for $290 from the Moron last week; he'd taken out $200 for the new carpet, $70 to clean the carpet, and $5 for a hole in the wall, which we don't argue at all. John put the hole in the wall when he tried to be a manly man and move the loveseat into the basement by himself. We'd even give him the $70, except that in the lease there's a clause that says "[Tenant] agrees to return the property in [the condition it was found] or pay a $100 cleaning fee." Seems that the $200 we paid would cover that, and then some.

Fucking new carpet. My ASS, new carpet.

The other ridiculous thing in the lease is about the security deposit:

[The deposit] will be held intact by the Landlord (Moron) until at least fourteen working days after Tenants have vacated the property. At that time the Landlord (Moron) will assess...blah blah blah.... This deposit money minus any necessary charges...will then be returned to Tenant with a written explanation of deductions, within fourteen working days after they have vacated the property.

Notice: he's going to wait 14 days, then send us the money within the same fourteen days. Moron.

Moron.

Moron.

So. The lawyer told me that we'd have a shot if we took the Moron to small claims court. Too bad we'd have to go to Michigan to do that, and pay more for travel than we'd get back from that bastard. The other thing we could do is pay the lawyer $150 to write a letter to the Moron and tell him he better send us a check, or else! Or else what? the Moron will say, and throw the letter in the trash, because he doesn't really have to send us a check, we'd just be bluffing if we did that. Lawyer says don't bother.

So the only thing that we can do, really, is nothing. I've thought about drafting a stern letter and trying to guilt him into a monetary apology of some sort, but that FUCKER is so fucking sanctimonious, he's so fucking sure that God is on his side and nothing he does is wrong, that it would only make me more pissed off. He's one of those people who's too fucking stupid to know that something HE DOES is wrong.

There is one thing that might make me feel better, but first I must state that this is my journal, and all opinions stated in this journal are simply my opinions, and are therefore legal and protected by all that free speech Constitution-y stuff that we all know and love.

If y'all ever live in Lansing or, really, anywhere in Michigan, take my completely legal advice:do not rent a house from Kevin Skiba.

S K I B A

In fact, e-mail me if you'd like his phone number. Or his home address. I have those things, right here on my poorly-worded grammatical nightmare of a dolt-written lease.