Helplessness and Healing

By Leigh

Shortly after the detectives left Giles emerged from Willow’s room. His
face was pale and his eyes were brimming with unshed tears. While he
busied himself cleaning his glasses he cleared his throat. “Willow would
like to see you, but give her just a minute first.”

“Is she okay?” Buffy asked.

“She is very brave and she did remarkably well. Now she just wants to go
home, be surrounded by her friends, and try to heal.”

Xander spoke up, even though he knew he shouldn’t. “Isn’t this all a
little quick?” The looks he received told him he should have stuck with
his first instinct. “I know, I know, let her set her own pace.”

Oz headed for the room pausing to put his hand on Giles’ shoulder.
“Thank you.”

* * *

The doctor talked to Willow for awhile and then called in Oz, Buffy, and
Xander giving them precise instructions for the care of her wounds and
warning signs they should be aware of. “I honestly don’t see any reason
to keep you here. I think you’ll be getting just as good of care at
home.” Taking two business cards out of her coat pocket she handed them
to her. “Call my office first thing tomorrow morning to set up a
follow-up exam and the other one is the therapist we talked about.
Please promise me you will call her. You seem to be handling this very
well on your own, but there’s nothing wrong with getting some help.”

Willow was smart enough to know that she would be needing it. “Thank
you. I will.”

After the doctor left Willow turned to her friends. “Okay, I’m ready to
get out of here.”

Buffy started to go toward the closet to get her clothes when she
stopped. “Uh, clothes.” Buffy knew that when Angel brought Willow in her
clothes had been in shreds.

Xander opened the closet and brought out the duffel bag he and Oz had
packed. “We grabbed stuff at Willow’s the other night.”

Buffy exhaled a sigh of relief, one sensitive topic escaped for the time
being. “Great.” Buffy opened the bag and pulled out the clothes the guys
had packed setting them on the bed. Once that was done they all just
sort of stood around looking at Willow, smiling. “So will you guys step
outside so the patient can get dressed. I promise I’ll take good care of
her.” Buffy knew what they were thinking. None of them were willing to
leave her out of their sight.

The guys nodded and blushed heading toward the door as Willow and Buffy
giggled.

* * *

When they walked out of Willow’s room Xander instantly recognized the
girl walking away. Jenna Pierce, a fellow Sunnydale High senior. She was
beautiful, intelligent, kind, popular, one of those too perfect girls
who had everything together. She also happened to be Percy’s girlfriend.

“Jenna?”

The slim brunette turned at the sound of her name. “Hi. I came to see
Willow, but then I just couldn’t do it.” Her voice was raspy and it was
obvious she had been crying.

They were both puzzled by her appearance at the hospital but Oz, as
always, was the first to regain his composure. “Willow’s getting
dressed, but you can go in in a minute.”

“I didn’t know you and Willow were friends.” Xander said as he tried to
figure out what Percy’s girlfriend was doing here.

“We’re not, exactly. I just . . . I heard what happened and I wanted to
see if she was okay.” The girl was fidgety and it was obvious that there
was more on her mind. “Maybe I should just see her tomorrow.” She turned
to leave but Oz’s voice stopped her.

“Jenna wait. Please. You came all the way here for something, don’t go.”

She turned to face him just as the tears spilled from her eyes. “Do you
really think she’s up to talking to me?”

Oz decided to be honest. “Yes, I do.”

* * *

Willow and Buffy were just finishing packing when Oz and Xander walked
in with Jenna between them.

Approaching Willow’s beside Jenna was horrified by what she saw. “If
this is a bad time I can come back.”

Oz watched Willow carefully to judge her reaction. “No, it’s okay. Come
in.” Willow told her, surprised and curious. They had gone to school
together forever, but never really talked.

Taking the bag Buffy set it down on the floor making room for Willow to
sit down. “Do you guys want some privacy?” Buffy offered hoping they
would say no since the last thing she wanted to do was leave them alone.

“No, it’s okay.” After Jenna’s reply Buffy let out a sigh of relief and
stepped closer to the guys by the door to give them, if not privacy, at
least the illusion of it.

Willow remained silent waiting for Jenna to start since she was the one
who made the visit. “Are you alright?”

Not sure how to answer the only reply Willow could think of was the
truth, “I will be.”

“I know what happened and who you said did it. The police questioned me
at home a little while ago.” Willow braced herself, waiting for Jenna to
explode. But the accusations and anger never came. Jenna juist stared at
Willow for a long time, her eyes wandering from one bruise to the other.

“You don’t seem surprised.”

“I am and I’m not.” Pulling her eyes away from Willow she walked closer
to the window and looked out. “When Percy and I started dating sophomore
year everything was perfect. And it stayed that way for a long time. We
had fun and we were in love. Everything was perfect, but it was more
than that. It was normal. The high school romance every girl dreams of.
Then about nine months ago . . .” her voice trailed off for a moment
before she continued. “Then real life stuff seemed to come crashing in.
His dad started drinking more and his temper flared, then he lost his
job and started blaming Percy for everything. As his grades slipped,
football became everything. It was where he could get away, let all of
his aggression and anger out. As he started spending more time away from
home he started hanging out with the wrong guys. He started drinking,
doing drugs and more and more he started becoming his father. Letting
the anger and pain out on the football field wasn’t enough.”

“Things between us got rough. We started fighting all the time. At first
it was little, stupid stuff. But each fight got worse. I was always
storming off or calling a girlfriend for a ride home. Each time swearing
I’d never take him back.” She let out a bitter laugh that held no humor.
“But each time he would come around the next day swearing it was going
to be different, he would make it different. Everything would be like it
was before. I was an idiot I believed him. But when you love somebody so
much they become the second half of yourself. And you want to believe in
them, you need to. Because if you lose that one person that means
everything, that one person that makes up your world, what do you have
left? I guess I thought that if I gave up on Percy I would lose this
huge part of myself. I wasn’t sure I could go on in pieces.”

Turning to face Willow, Jenna walked over to the bed. “On Friday the
coach found something and kicked him off the team. He came over more
loaded than I’ve ever seen him and we had another fight, a big one. I
finally said enough and he flew off in a rage.” Losing the fight with
the tears Jenna sobbed. “Willow, I’m so sorry. I never thought he would
hurt anybody else.”

Pulling the other girl into an embrace Willow whispered. “Jenna what
happened isn’t your fault.”

“Yes, it is. I should have stopped him a long time ago. But I didn’t, I
kept letting it happen.”

If Willow had heard this confession three days ago she never would have
believed they were talking about the same Percy that she had been
tutoring. Now it didn’t shock her at all. “Percy’s hurt you too hasn’t
he?”

The shame in her eyes was clear. “Yes, and other stuff. I threatened to
go to the police, but he convinced me that nobody would believe me. We
had already slept together so what proof would I have? I was a pathetic
idiot. Then finally when I do get the intelligence and courage to say
enough is enough and he just goes out and hurts somebody else.”

For a long time Willow and Jenna cried together sharing in the grief and
shame that Percy had inflicted on both of them. After awhile Willow’s
tears ended but she continued rocking Jenna slowly. Finally, her tears
spent, Jenna pulled away. “I still love Percy, not the Percy he’s
become, but the one he was then. Before. Does that even make sense?”

Willow handed her a tissue. “Yes, it does. Jenna you need to talk to
somebody.”

“I know. I told the police, about everything. My mom is taking me down
tonight to file charges against him. I probably can’t get him on rape,
but possibly for assault. And I will testify.”

Reaching into her pocket Willow pulled out the card the doctor had given
her. “This is a therapist I’m going to see. Maybe you should call her
too?”

Jenna took the card and nodded. “I will. And if you ever want to talk
will you please call me?”

“You too.”

They talked for a few more minutes and then said their good-byes. When
Buffy spoke up Jenna jumped, she had forgotten about the others. “Do you
have any idea where Percy might be now?”

She shook her head immediately, having already given it a lot of
thought. “His uncle has a cabin by the lake they use in the summer, but
the police have checked there and they’re watching it. That’s all I can
think of. I gave them a list of his friends, but I doubt he’s with any
of them. If I hear from him I’ll call you right away though.”

As the door closed Willow felt three pairs of eyes on her. “Wow. You
okay Will?” Xander asked.

Walking over to Oz she put her head on his shoulder and nodded her head.
“Are you sure baby? You seem like you’re in shock.”

“Actually, I’m not. After the side I saw of Percy it would have been
more shocking to find out he hadn’t done something before. There was
just too much rage.”

Buffy picked up the bag and Xander grabbed the flowers and balloons and
together they headed for the door. “I guess deep down I thought maybe
there was something Hellmouthy behind all of this.”

“Unfortunately, not everything can be traced back to the Hellmouth.
Sometimes it’s just plain, everyday people gone bad. No supernatural
dark forces needed.” Oz told her tightening his grip on Willow’s hand.

As they turned out the light Xander whispered. “That’s even scarier than
the demons, prophecies, and vampires.” The other three could only nod in
agreement.


Continues
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