Well here's the X-Files Episode Generator!!! Go Ahead... Make an Award Winning Television Show!

 

1. Teaser - Holy smokes! There's... a) a parasitic lifeform! b) an alien abduction! c) a serial killing! d) all of the above!  2. A.D. Skinner walks into Mulder's 'Basement' where Mulder and Scully are... a) watching one of the videos in Mulder's desk that aren't his b) working on another case c) waiting to be abducted d) doing somthing else.... ;-)  3. Our heroes investigate the crime scene with... a) two stop watches b) a geiger counter that looks like a zooped up "Dirt Devil" c) a briefcase filled with cool FBI type stuff d) little regard for disturbing the scene of a crime e) all of the above  4. Scully is... a) pouting b) pissed off c) skeptical at first d) suffering from PMS e) abducted again f) all of the above  5. Mulder is... a) on to something b) at his wits end c) suspicious d) psychic e) "spooky" f) hung-over g) all of the above  6. They both run into... a) red-tape b) hostile local law-enforcement officials c) a crazy person whom no-one believes d) another car e) MIB f) all of the above  7. Mulder meets Deep Throat at... a) an aquarium b) the Washington Monument c) Walmart d) Taco Bell  8. Deep Throat then... a) gives Mulder a manila envelope filled to bursting with totally useless information b) tells him he's "Really close!" c) tells him to "Back off!" d) sends Mulder on a wild goose chase e) gets shot  9.a. Meanwhile Scully consults some... a) conspiracy freaks b) really mean bikers c) forensic friends at the morgue d) computers e) dead relatives f) all of the above  9.b. where she flashes her... a) smile b) badge c) flashlight d) surly disposition  10.a. Meanwhile Mulder meets X... a) outside a theatre b) in a hospital basement c) in a big dark place  10.b. X then... a) betrays him b) gives him the infamous manilla envelope full of crap c) tells Mulder "it" is out of his durisdiction d) shoots someone e) shoots someone twice f) all of the above!  11. Scully feels left out... a) because Mulder is in love with Skinner b) Mulder likes the aliens who abducted Scully c) Mulder is dating Scully's mum d) Mulder is best friends with the lone gunmen  12.a. Scully and Mulder hook-up at... a) an airport bookstore b) his/her trashed apartment c) a sleazy motel d) an abandoned warehouse filled with mutating cadavres  12.b. where they then... a) flirt b) yell at each other c) check for strange "marks" on each other's bodies d) shoot off corny one-liners e) decide on which red-herring to go chasing after  12.c. while waiting for nightfall they decide to date, but... a) Mulder's mum won't let them b) Skinner won't let them c) the aliens won't let them d) FOX won't let them e) all of the above  13.a. LOOK OUT! There's... a) an alien b) a psychopath c) an armed and surly C.I.A. operative d) an unhelpful local (in-bred) citizen  13.b. hiding in that... a) cellar b) van c) barn d) spooky warehouse e) hi-tech government facility  14.a. Mulder and Scully narrowly escape with their lives thanks to... a) a handy ventilation shaft b) superior weaponry c) Scully's intimate knowledge of hot-wiring cars d) alien stupidity e) all of the above  14.b. but they are tailed by... a) aliens b) army guys c) the NSA d) the CIA e) "Them" f) their consciences g) all of the above  15. Their only solid lead turns out to be... a) a wild goose chase b) a dead-end c) a fake UFO picrure d) a passing weather balloon e) lights from a semi on top of a hill during a full moon  16. All the evidence... a) disappears b) is destroyed by the CIA c) sinks symbolically into the bay d) gets put in a giant hi-tech government secret facility that keeps that sort of dangerous stuff from the public  17. Mulder is left... a) shaking his head b) holding the bag c) whining about government secrecy d) worrying about his job status e) dragging his own personal oxygen tank behind him f) wondering why he has to convince Scully about the existence of aliens at the start of every episode