Authors Note: Okay, I know the ending to part 16 was a little lame. But it was the only way I could get it to work the way I wanted it to. I had another way, which would have been more vicious, and angsty, but it wouldn't have been realistic. You know what I mean? As for when I said the love of Willow's life...If you've ever seen, "Evening Star," which is the sequel to "Terms of Endearment", this old lady is on her quest to find the love of her life and it turns out to be her grandson. It's nothing sick or preverted. And those of you who haven't seen it...you have got to see it. It's wonderful. Especially if your in for a good cry.

********************Part 17*****************

"Oz? Oz...come on. We got to wake up if we want to get some more fishing done," Willow said, beating at his chest slightly.

"What's the point of fishing when I suck at it?" Oz mumbled, grabbing a pillow a foot away, and putting it over his face to block out the intense light, radiating off of the sun. He kept it there, for at least a minute until he felt that his pupils could adjust to the lighting. Thankfully, Willow had blocked it out this time with one of the blankets. He sighed in relief and sat up.

"Better?" Willow asked.

"Much,"

"Good. Come on, get dressed. I want to go out," Willow said in a hurried voice, unzipping the tent entrance, allowing unwanted light to filter in. Oz flinched while the light from the sun, bounced off the windshield of his car, and shined directly into his eyes. Reaching for his jeans, he slipped them on with little effort. For some reason they were more loose on him than usual. Ducking his head, he slipped through the hole of the tent, smiling at the sight of Willow, building up a fire, cooking pre-packaged chicken on a metal stick.

"I take it, we are eating cooked food for once?" Oz asked, walking over, bending down grabbing a piece of wood and throwing it into the fire. It blazed another inch or so higher, causing Willow to step back an inch or two. He stood up again, stalking towards Willow. Easing his arms around her waist, he led a path of butterfly kisses from the nape of her neck, to the pulse point between the front of her throat and chest. It took all of her self control not to squirm, and burst out laughing. Instead, she just smiled, doing her best not to drop the chicken into the fire. He continued to tease her, his fingers fluttering over her stomach as he began to tickle her mercilessly, when he received no reaction to his previous attempts. That got Willow to let out a shriek. Dropping the stick, not caring about the chicken any more, the two backed up away from the fire. She grabbed at his hands desperately, using her nails to make small indents into the skin of his knuckles, when ever she found enough self control to grip them.

Oz winced, pulling back one of his hands to inspect the soon-to-be-bruised skin. She always had sharp nails. Slowing his hand's movements, he rested his hand on her stomach, enjoying the sound of Willow's delighted mewls everytime it swept across her belly. Her sweatshirt eventually fell from its scrunched up perch, and covered her stomach with his palm. They stayed that way for a moment or so, their legs soon losing support, causing them to plop to the ground. Oz crawled over to a tree, bringing Willow with him, leaning his back against the dark cedar. They rested there for half an hour or so, engaging in the occasional smoochies, and the light hearted quips the two had become so accustomed to within the last few days.

Stroking her hair, he looked down at his watch. Eleven in the morning. He sighed, pushing against her back, beckoning her to stand up.

"We have about two hours or so to fish, before the sun gets too high. We really woke up late," Oz said, his voice, normally neutral, had a sense of surprise to it.

"So, that really means, let's start walking before the sun gets too high," Willow confirmed.

"Right," Oz said, nodding his head, wrapping an arm around her waist, and holding some of the fishing equipment with the other. They walked the two miles to the gorgeous clearing they had met up with the other day, and cast their poles. This time it appeared to be Oz's lucky day. For he caught eight big fish, and Willow only caught seven.

********

"Ha ha, I beat you," Oz gloated, jumping in the air, doing some kind of victory dance, and mouthing words that made no sense when put together.

Willow just waved her hand and smiled at him, then shook her head when he wasn't looking, muttering the word...

"Men," she sighed in happy exasperation. She started walking faster, doing her best to keep up with her boyfriend. Suddenly, he stopped, causing her to jolt back to keep from running into his arms. This boy was definitely on some kind of sugar high. So it seemed. Smiling, and breathing hard, he wrapped his arms around her shoulders again, slowing her pace from five miles an hour to three miles an hour, kissing her cheek every so often.

They reached their campsite about ten minutes later, laughing at some funny joke Oz had learned from Jesse. It was probably about 2:10 in the afternoon when they arrived. Oz started tickling at her waist again, causing the two to tumble to the ground, rolling in the winter leaves like wild animals. Willow felt something fall out of her pocket. When Oz stopped for a moment, providing her with a chance to breathe, she searched around with her hands for whatever she might have lost. Then she found it. Her pager. Oz looked at it, his memory suddenly flying back, and prayed she wouldn't be pissed about him reading her messages. He also prayed that the message she received was meant to go to someone else.

"Oh wow, I've got a message. Maybe it's Kevin," Willow said excitedly. Pressing the button that said, "check message", she watched the screen impatiently while it downloaded last night's message. The words moved slowly across the screen. Oz watched her as her face went from bright, energetic, and eager, to shock, horror, and worry in her eyes.

"Willow?" Oz asked concerned. Willow looked away from her pager to look at Oz, tears evident in her eyes. Gasping, she breathed in the cold afternoon air, as she realized that the shit was about to hit the fan. Blinking her eyes, desperately wanting to believe that this was some dream, and any moment, she would wake up in the tent with Oz's arms wrapped around her waist, she stood up, moving for the tent, where her cell phone was.

Alarm lanced through Oz's body, at the evident possibility that she really did have a son. Running towards her, he grabbed her elbow, swinging her around to face him. Phone in her hand, she dropped it at the feel of Oz, pulling roughly at her arms, forcing her to look at him.

"Oz..uh....*sniff*...I really need to...*sniff*," Willow started, then broke off at the thought that something terrible could have happened to her son. Oz's expression went from concern to horror.

"Willow. Tell me you're kidding. Tell me that message wasn't for you," Oz pleaded, rising anger and concern in his voice. Willow shook her head violently.

"I can't...." Willow said sadly. "I have to...call," Willow cried, her voice breaking off into a gasp of tears. Oz's hand flew away from her, frozen in place, he couldn't move. He couldn't think. He looked at her with a semi-impassive feature of fear, disgust, concern, and worry. He looked at her, the way Buffy looked at Angelus. He looked at her, as if he loved what she used to be, but absolutely despised the demon she was now. And what was worse was that Willow actually felt like a demon. Willow averted her eyes to her feet, knowing that one look in Oz's eyes would tell her that things were over. Oz stepped back slowly, averting his eyes to the ground, as he walked out to the gravel covered road.

Willow bent down, and picked up the phone, once Oz backed off and was at least 50 feet away. Gulping down the tears of shame and fear, she slowly walked into a clearing surrounded by a bunch of trees, where her conversations could be easily hidden. They could also be easily heard if you got close enough.

She dialed the number of the hospital, asking the secretary to direct her to Dr. Jacobs office. The man picked up on the third ring, while Willow did her best to hide her hysterical sobs. Kevin was hurt, so she thought, Oz hated her and was so not going to forgive her for this, and she still had to drive back to SunnyDale, with Oz in the same car so she could pack her things. There was no way she was going to spend another two days in SunnyDale. Not when the air was this still.

Oz, even though he was 75 feet away, could still hear her crying into the phone. Walking over to a nearby tree, 20 feet from where Willow was standing, he ducked down into a hollow tree, peering through a small hole, just close enough for him to hear the conversation.

"Hello?" Dr. Jacobs said over the phone.

"Hello. This is Willow Rosenburg. You paged me about my so," Willow said in tears, desperately trying to remain calm. The situation was just too much to handle.

"Miss. Rosenburg, Rosenburg...." The doctor muttered, looking at his chart. "Ahh yes. Miss. Rosenburg,"

"Is he okay?" Willow asked in a rush.

"Who?" The doctor asked.

"My son god damn it!!!!" Willow screamed.

"Oh yes. He's just fine. He's in the nursery right now. Would you like to talk to him?"

"Yes," Willow said, breathing in a sigh of relief, wiping at her tears.

"Please wait one moment. He'll be in here shortly,"

About a minute went by, and then there was a slight rustling at the phone.

"Hello?" A childish voice asked over the phone.

"Kevin? Sweety. Are you okay? What happened? What are you doing there?" Willow asked, immediately going into her concerned, but relieved motherly voice.

"Hey Mommy," Kevin said into the phone.

"Hey baby. What are you doing there?" Willow asked.

"Grandma had a heart attack," Kevin said, his voice slightly higher than normal. Willow's heart froze at those words. First, she thought something bad had happened to Kevin, but now it turned out that he was okay. Something had happened to her Nanna.

Willow held in her raw gasp of emotional pain, causing her features to glow a sickly white-yellow color. Oz looked at her through the peep hole, still trying to decipher whether he hated her, or if he was just in shock. He was pretty sure it was a little bit of both. Okay...alot of both. How could she lie to him like that? That kid was most certainly at least 5 years old. *I trusted her. I was going to give up everything for her. I did give up everything for her.* Oz thought, his eyes glaring at the figure twenty feet from the peep hole he was looking through. *But look at her. I hate it when she cries.* He was having a hard time admitting that some part of him hated her. He loved her. He could never hate her. Especially if he loved her. So if he hated her, then why did it hurt so much?

"Is she okay?" Willow asked, her voice trembling. She kept reminding herself. She had to stay strong. For Kevin. For her sanity.

"I don't think so. They won't let me or Grandpa see her," Kevin said.

"When did this happen?" Willow asked paceing.

"Yesterday afternoon. I don't know what happened. I heard some glass break, and then I dialed 911 when I realized she was hurt,"

"Well I'm very proud of you Kevin," Willow said, sniffing quietly. Kevin smiled slightly over the phone. He knew his Mommy wasn't very comfortable with the subject of him being in the hospital.

"Guess what?" Kevin asked, trying to make his voice sound happy.

"What?" Willow asked sniffling and smiling into the phone.

"I met a really pretty girl in the little kids room yesterday," Kevin said.

"Oh really?" Willow asked into the phone, her Grandma momentarily forgotten as she gave it her all to her son on the other end of the line.

"Yep. She's really pretty. She has your hair color too," Kevin said.

"Oh really?" Willow asked, in a deep, interested, juicy voice that said: tell all. It was one of those voices Buffy gave her when Willow would describe her dreams about Oz, and how they soon became a reality. *No. can't think about that.* Willow thought to herself.

"Uh huh. Her name is SunShine," Kevin said.

"You two going to go out on a date?" Willow asked.

"Ewwww...that's nasty. Boys don't go out with girls. Girls are disgusting. Girls are...are..are weird. I don't understand them. Sunshine won't talk to me. Every time I ask her a question, she just blushes and looks the other way," Kevin said saddened. Willow smiled brilliantly, then laughed at her son.

"I thought you said she was pretty," Willow said.

"Well she is. But, she's gross because she's a girl," Kevin replied.

"Well what if she turned out to be a guy?" Willow asked. "Would she still be gross?" Willow asked.

"First of all, guys aren't pretty. But they're not gross because they are guys. Women, are pretty but they are gross because they are girls," Kevin said satisfied with his answer.

"So that means that I'm gross?" Willow asked.

"Well...no you're not gross because you're my Mommy and if you were gross then I would be gross so you're not gross because you're my Mommy," Kevin explained.

"Oh I see. Let me get this straight. I'm not gross, because than you would be gross, because I'm your Mommy, so because I'm your Mommy I can't be gross," Willow said into the phone.

Oz looked somewhat baffled at the conversation she was having with her son. That did not make sense. But despite his anger he couldn't help but smile at the most recent statement coming out of her mouth. Women were not gross. Especially Willow Rosenburg.

"Right," Kevin said giggling. Then he stopped while the doctor called over the phone. "Mommy...the doctor wants to talk to you about Grandma," Kevin said sullenly.

"Okay sweety. I'll miss you," Willow said.

"Bye Mommy. I'll miss you, too," Kevin said, handing the phone to the doctor.

"Miss. Rosenburg?" Dr. Jacobs asked over the phone.

"Yes,"

"I assume Kevin told you of your Grandmother's misfortunes," The doctor said. Willow could pick up a trace of British in his voice. *British in Mexico?*

"Yes. How is she. Is she okay?" Willow asked. The doctor let out a long sigh.

"She is comatose ma'am. She's an old lady Miss. She's lucky we were able to revive her," The doctor said. The sickly white-yellow pallor of her face came back again and she let out a reverant sob. Covering her mouth with her hand she gasped out, "Nanna" and broke into a shudder.

"Do you think she'll wake up?" Willow asked, pulling a lock of her hair out of her wetted face, because it was starting to irritate her skin.

"It is possible, but I can't guarantee that there won't be any brain damage," The doctor said sullenly.

"Oh my god," Willow whispered into the air.

"She's an old woman Miss. Rosenburg. Nearly 81 years old. I'm surprised this is her first attack for a woman as active as she is,"

"What possible brain damage?" Willow asked.

"Its possible that if she wakes up she might have memory loss. Seizures, frequent attacks such as the ones from last night. There might be moments when she can't move or she may be paralyzed from the waist down," The doctor answered.

"Whats most common?" Willow asked, walking closer to where Oz was hiding.

"Brain loss, and paralyzation. Cardiac arrest is most common two or three months after the first attack, so chances are that she might be in the hospital more than once this year. We'll need to run test, and an REA about once a month," Dr. Jacobs said.

"REA?" Willow asked.

"Radiology scans in general. To check for tumors, or clots in the blood system. We might need to do a few bipasses on her if she does happen to have any clots,"

"Okay. Is she allowed visitors?" Willow asked.

"We thought it was best not to let Kevin see her just yet. He is, after all, only five and you know how little kids don't understand these sort of things. We were hoping you could come down here and pick up your son. That's what the real page was basically about. I didn't want to really alarm you. Sorry if I did," The doctor said in a calm voice.

"That's quite all right. I'll be there as soon as possible," Willow said hanging up the phone.

Oz had ducked out of the hollow tree only seconds before she hung up the phone, and walked back over to the camp site to pack up his things.

Willow crouched down, burying her face in her hands, her elbows resting on her knees as she worried over her grandma. She stood there for at least five minutes, the time flying by as her mind grew into a haze and she zoned out. The sound of Oz's stale voice hollering for her broke her out of her daze, and she stood up slowly. She walked out towards the campsite, and noticed he was packing up the remains of their tent, and fishing supplies. She walked over towards the car, desperately needing to hear his voice. Anything was better than silence.

Oz, noticing her presense, stiffened ten fold when he noticed she was only five feet away.

Willow let out a shuddering breath, and sniffled at the sight of Oz's stiff posture. He flinched, as the soft sound seemed to magnify times a thousand in his ears. He shut the trunk of the car slowly, turned around, and avoided her figure as much as possible as he rounded the car to unlock her side of the car. Willow wrung her hands, desperately trying to think of something to say. Oz unlocked his side of the door, and stepped in, then waited impatiently for Willow to do the same. The sooner he could get her out of his sight, the better. Willow breathed in the cold air once more, then opened the door, and slid in slowly. She did her best to avoid the sight of his figure, but her peripheral vision wouldn't allow it. As soon as she shut the door, and buckled her seat belt, Oz started the engine and pulled out of the driveway, going about five miles past the speed limit to make the trip shorter.

He hated the silence. He inwardly wished that she would say something, anything that would give him a reason to yell at her, scream at her, make her understand how incredibly pissed he was. Willow found her voice, what little of it she had left, and asked the only thing she could think of. *How much does he hate me?*

"So....this is probably the part where you tell me how much you hate me," Willow said, bracing herself for the words that would inevitably come out of his mouth. Nothing could prepare her for what she was about to hear. Oz waited a few seconds, clenching his jaw, his fingers tightening around the steering wheel. He didn't have it in his heart to yell at her. Not yet. His voice came out neutral, but Willow could hear the ice behind his words.

"Probably...more than Buffy hates Angelus," Oz said, his jaw clenched, and his eyes fixated on the road ahead. Willow felt her heart drop down to her feet at his words, but refused to make one move. She wouldn't look at him, she wouldn't scream at him. She just sat there, as bitter acceptance reigned through her now-dead heart. A few seconds passed, and an unknown force made her look at him. She tried to turn her head back to the window next to her, but her eyes were locked on the tick in his cheek that appeared everytime he blinked. She knew he knew that she was watching him.

"Then why aren't you screaming at me?" Willow asked, as acceptance burned through her skin. Oz looked over at her, at the sound of her question, and visibly flinched at the sight of her stony features, and red eyes. In that one hour, from when they were tickling each other, until now, her appearance seemed to age over 20 years. He turned his head back to pay attention to the road, and soon his voice seemed to have a mind of his own. For the first time in a long time, he thought he heard tears in his own voice.

"Anger comes later...right now, this is still shock," Oz said, surprised to see Willow just sit there. Willow nodded her head knowingly, and turned her head back to the scenery outside her window. Her head rested against the cushioned seat, and the tears blurred her vision, eventually causing her eyes to fall shut, and lead her into a turbulent sleep.

The rest of the trip seemed to run by in a daze for Oz. He was right when he said that anger comes later. Right now he was still in shock, which scared the hell out of him. If he hated her this much now, what would he do to her later? That thought only made him drive faster.

Willow continued to fall in and out of sleep, as reality finally began to sink in. This was it. This was the rest of her life, and she had no one to blame but herself. She played with the ring on her necklace, the one Oz gave her a month before she started college at UCSD. Oz would momentarily watch her through the side mirror, and almost felt a spark of compassion, until he remembered why he was angry with her in the first place.

*****2 hours later*****

Oz stopped at the nearest gas station, causing Willow to jolt awake from her semi-day dreaming. Emotionally exhausted, her eyes drifted shut until she heard the shutting of the car door on the driver's side of the vehicle. She sat up quickly, and looked around until her eyes rested on Oz's bony fingers, which were somewhat purple because he was so cold. Blinking her eyes a couple of times, she finally had the nerve to ask where they were.

"Where are we?" Willow asked in a sleepy voice. Her voice caused Oz to look away from the road for a second, until he heard someone honking at him for taking up both lanes. He quickly maneuvered back into the right lane.

"30 miles outside of SunnyDale. There is some food in a sack on the floor board if you're hungry," Oz offered. Willow silently shook her head, as the very thought of food made her nauseous.

Willow sat there, bonelessly as she watched the scenery turn from country to city traffic. Eventually, Oz stopped in Buffy's drive way. Opening the door, he headed for the back of the car, and opened the trunk, methodically pulling out Willow's sports bag of clothes and necessities. By the time Willow made it to the back, everything was out, and Oz was waiting somewhat impatiently for her to get back there. He helped carry her bags to the door, seeing that Buffy wasn't there, then looked at her one last time.

Willow opened the door with her key, and looked down at her feet while Oz stared at her. Oz, realizing he was staring, turned around and headed for the car. When he was halfway there, he heard Willow call out to him.

"Oz?" Willow asked in a pained voice. He turned around slowly to acknowledge her. She walked over to him, holding his eyes the entire time. "Is...there any..possibility, that you'll ever talk to me again?" Willow asked, wringing her hands slightly the entire time she spoke. Oz smiled sadly, shaking his head slightly to clear his thoughts. Looking down at his feet for a second and then back into her eyes, he said the only thing he could honestly think of.

"I...don't know," Oz said, before turning around, opening his car door, and pulling it shut. At his answer, Willow turned around and headed back towards the house, bending over slightly to pick up her sports bag. Oz watched her as she gracefully bent over to pick up her bags before starting the engine. At that moment, he wasn't looking at her with hatred in his eyes. Just years of pain and longing. She turned back to look at him one last time, her eyes never leaving his until he was out of the drive way. Shivering as the cold crisp air blew against her skin, she stepped inside the house, and shut the door.

The house was hollow, so the entire time, she felt like someone was watching her. She hated it. Dropping her bag, she absentmindedly headed towards her room, intent on packing her bags so she could leave for Mexico. Instead, she took one look at it, and collapsed into a boneless heap, writhing against the door, as tears racked her entire body. The very thought of her situation felt like a thousand blows to the stomach with a metal bar.

Buffy arrived shortly after Oz had left, and nearly broke at the sight of her best friend in so much pain. And she knew it all too well.

"Oh my god!!! Willow?" Buffy cried as she made her way over to the quaking redhead in front of her. Willow looked up at the sound of her best friend's voice. Her ragged appearance reminded Buffy somewhat of a cave man.

"Buffy?" Willow asked

"Willow...god, what happened?" Buffy asked sitting on her knees and stroking Willow's hair, after the red head scrambled over to her friend, and lay her head down into her best friend's lap.

"Buffy...I don't know what to do," Willow cried, her tears making a big wet spot in Buffy's jeans.

"Willow...what happened?" Buffy asked, a little more than impatient.

"He hates me Buffy. He hates me so much," Willow said.

"Who? Oz? Willow, he'd never hate you. What are you talking about?"

"The hospital in Mexico paged me, and Oz apparently read the message...and all hell broke out when he realized that it really was intended for me to read," Willow said.

"I don't understand," Buffy said, confused.

"My Grandma had a heart attack, and Kevin was at the hospital with her and they paged me, asking me to pick him up. When I confirmed to Oz, that I did have a son...oh god....Buffy, you should have seen the look on his face...he looked at me the way you look at a vampire," Willow said, her depression only growing deeper.

"I'm sure you were wrong Willow. Oz could never look at you that way. He could never hate you. Let alone say it to your face," Buffy said, in reassuring words. Willow let out a harsh laugh, causing Buffy to jump slightly at how much sarcasm came out of her friend's voice.

"You have no idea," Willow said.

"What does that mean?" Buffy asked.

"He told me how much he hated me Buffy,"

"He did?" Buffy asked surprised, desperately not wanting to believe it. "What did he say?" Buffy asked quietly. Willow turned her head so she could look at Buffy.

"He told me that he probably hated me more than you hated Angelus," Willow replied, the memory of his words ringing in her ears. Buffy shook her head.

"I don't believe it."

"Believe it."

"That son of bitch!" Buffy cried angrily.

"Don't be mad at him Buffy. It's my fault. I should have told him the second I found out," Willow said, her cries turning into long sighs and sniffles as the comfort of her best friend began to settle in. Even if Buffy was wrong, it still felt good for her best friend to call him a son of a bitch. Because that's what best friends do. Right? Silence reigned through the room, as Willow continued to sob, and Buffy continued to comfort her.

"What are you going to do?" Buffy finally asked quietly.

"I don't know," Willow answered.

"Did you want me to go pick up Kevin?" Buffy asked. Willow looked at her in surprise. She really didn't want to stay in SunnyDale for the next two or three days, but she also didn't want to be alone. Samantha was probably some where in Miami right now, and Buffy really was the only true friend she had aside from Xander, who still lived in SunnyDale. She sat up, propping her back up against the wall. Buffy eyed her best friend carefully, praying that she wouldn't do anything drastic. Willow stared at the wall for a few moments before looking over at Buffy and nodding. Buffy smiled at her. Handing her friend the nearest phone, Buffy stood up, packed a few toys that she bought for Kevin, provided she saw him anytime soon, and went out to start the car.

Willow dialed the hospital's number, and told them that Buffy Summers would be picking up her son for her and they agreed to her wishes.

********Part 18. Noon. The next day, SunnyDale Airport.********

The flight from Cancun to SunnyDale, had just landed, and a five year old boy, obviously on a sugar high, bounded down the ramp. Then a woman, dressed modestly in a white Nike sweatshirt, and black Adidas pants, with brass rimmed sunglasses followed him. She was quite surprised that Kevin, while usually a sweet boy, could be so hard to take care of when his mother wasn't around to discipline him. Running up and down the escalators was almost Buffy's undoing.

He was having so much fun, he just couldn't stop...that is until he ran into a much older man, who appeared to be in his late twenties, his red-blonde hair spiked up in a similar fashion such as Kevin's. Dressed in loose tan khaki pants, and a long red t-shirt that hung loose, complimented by a pair of stylish sunglasses, the man inwardly winced in annoyance. He looked down to see who had kicked him in the back of his knee, only to see no one there. He looked around quickly, then looked down in front of him when he heard a young tiny voice murmur "Sorry," as he raced down the escalator. The man smiled, but suddenly frowned at the thought that he supposedly had a kid that he never met, because his ex-girlfriend decided not to tell him until yesterday. He shook his head to clear his thoughts, then furrowed his brow when he heard a familiar voice.

"Kevin..." Buffy groaned.

"Yes aunt Buffy?" The young boy asked.

"Could you please stand still for a couple of seconds? You're going to get me in so much trouble, and you don't want me telling your mom about how badly you are behaving. Especially when she is as upset as she is right now. So could you please, stop running all over the place?" She looked around, as she put her check book back into her purse to see if anyone was staring at her. There were a few glances that were thrown in her direction, but they soon disipated to a small grimace of distaste before going back to reading their daily newspaper. There was one person, on the other hand, who seemed to be frozen in shock. Buffy spared a glance at him, then averted her attention to her purse momentarily, until she realized who that person was. Quickly looking back up to the prone figure 20 feet away, she nearly jumped out of her skin, at the sight of her best friend's, most assumed ex-boyfriend. Not taking her eyes off the man, she squatted down and whispered quietly to Kevin.

"Kevin...sweety. Will you do me a favor? You see where all those little girls and boys are playing?" Buffy asked. Kevin nodded his head. "I want you to go over there and make a few friends while I take care of some business. Will you do that for me?" Buffy asked.

"Yes aunt Buffy.....on one condition," Kevin said in a sneaky voice.

"What would that be?" Buffy asked, glancing back at the man cloaked in khaki.

"Don't tell Mommy I was being bad," Kevin said.

"Kevin..." Buffy said with menace in her voice.

"Okay, okay. I'm going. Sheesh! Women," Kevin said, trotting over to the slides where all the little girls and boys were playing. When Buffy noticed he was at a safe distance, she walked over to the man standing near the escalator.

"Hey Oz," Buffy said in a friendly voice, tinted with venom.

"Hello Buffy," Oz said, looking towards the playground where the boy who was most definitely Willow's son, was learning to make new friends.

"Willow...told me what happened. She was pretty convinced that you hated her," Buffy said, somewhat hurt that one of her friends would say that to another one of her friends. Oz only nodded his head in recognition of his words from the day before. Buffy sighed. "So what she said was true. She wasn't just going on instinct?" Oz nodded again, his eyes brimming with tears.

"I shouldn't have said it. But I felt it, and she asked," Oz said. Buffy fought down her impulse to beat the shit out of him right there in public.

"Do you still hate her?" Buffy asked.

"Wouldn't you?" Oz asked. Buffy flinched at the seriousness of his question to her question. She shook her head.

"That's not fair. This is not my problem. It doesn't matter what I think. He's not my son, heaven forbid I ever have one, he's yours," Buffy said, her voice reaching a higher octave. Oz flinched, and averted his gaze from Buffy's eyes to the little boy playing 'Duck Duck Goose' with the other children.

"So he is mine," Oz rationalized. He kind of figured it was because of his age, but the other night he kept wondering why Willow left him five years ago, without telling him why, and he kind of figured it might have been because of another man. Buffy looked at him with bug eyes, as if he were an idiot.

"Duh!!! Do you see how old he is? Turned five, January 7th. It's been five years, whose else could he have been?" Buffy asked.

"Well, seeing that she mysteriously left me five years ago, and refused to tell me why, it sort of brought me to a possible conclusion that she was sleeping with someone else," Oz said. Buffy's heart pounded in her chest, her nails boring huge dents into the wood railing she was using for support. A tear leaked out of her eye.

"You...unimaginable bastard....do you honestly think Willow would....do something like that?" Buffy asked, eyeing him in disgust. He looked down at his feet, as the insult struck him hard. "She left you because she was saving you. She wanted you to forget about her, for reasons I will not mention because you've heard plenty of times how much she hates her parents, and move on, rather than grow old with her and then one day resent her for staying," Buffy said angrily. Her voice softened as she said..."She didn't even know she was pregnant until after spending a month in New York. Believe me, Samantha will tell you how upset she was. And no it wasn't because she was pregnant. It was because she thought, that the love of her life, who might I add was in SunnyDale moping, hated her. That's why she wouldn't tell you. Now I can't speak for Willow, because I've never been in her position, but I honestly can't hate her for being afraid. And I know you can't either, because...well just because you're of the male gender doesn't mean you're immune to emotions. I know you've been afraid. I could see it in your face, at the thought that you'd never see her again, and I know you're afraid right now because you, being of the male gender, don't want to admit to the possibility that I might be right. You want to hate her, because she hurt you, and because she lied to you, but you can't because the possibility that she really does love you, scares the living shit out of you," Buffy said. It was probably the most passionate speech she had ever spoken in her entire life. Oz looked up from the floor, and smiled bitterly.

"I can't help it Buffy. She lied to me for five years...and I can't forget that. I can't forget that, I've missed five years of my son's life, because she was too afraid to tell me. I can forgive her in time...but I'll never forget," Oz said sadly.

"So what if she turns out to be pregnant in a month from now, convinced that you hate her? Do you honestly expect her tell you? Or do you hate her so much, that you wouldn't even want to know?" Buffy asked sadly. She looked over at Kevin, who was trotting around a circle of boys and girls, then back at Oz. "You're right Oz. You missed five incredible years of his life because of Willow. But now it's going to be you're fault when you miss the next 50 because you just can't let it go! You're going to be the person he hates the most because he never knew the person his mother refused to stop loving," Buffy said sadly. She looked up at Oz, knowing that she probably loosened a few locks on his emotional door, then took his hand and lightly kissed him on the cheek before turning around, and walking over to the playground. Oz hated it when he didn't have the last word, so he let his pride speak for him.

"You're wrong in that Buffy," Oz said loud enough for her to hear. She turned around, understanding that it was just his male pride speaking for him....so she wasn't going to take anything he said seriously. She walked back over to him.

"Oh really?" Buffy asked curtly, and crossing her arms over her stomach, and under her chest.

"Willow...doesn't love me," Oz said, blinking as his own words stung him. Buffy just smiled.

"I think your lying to yourself," Buffy said smiling.

"And why is that?" Oz asked, instinctively going defensive.

"Because you blinked, you got defensive when I insulted your pride, and you're male. Yep...definitely lying," Buffy said, walking away. Oz felt like dying at her words, but being the lack of emotion guy in the scooby gang, it would be hard for him to admit it.

"Say, wait a minute...what's up with you and this whole anti-male thing going around?" Oz asked.

"Talk to Jesse. He'll fill you in," Buffy said.

He started walking away, then stopped at the sound of his son's voice. "Aunt Buffy? Who was that?" Kevin asked. Buffy looked up towards the man who had moved, but who had stopped at the sound of his son's voice.

"He's just a friend your mother isn't getting along with right now," Buffy said. "Come on Kevin. I'm sure your mom is anxious to see you," Buffy said, grabbing his hand and walking towards the exit doors.

"How long do I get to stay here?" Kevin asked.

"Until your mother thinks she is ready to go back to New York," Buffy said, opening the passenger side of her car. She put Kevin in, making sure he put on his seat belt correctly, then moved over to her side to start the engine.

"Can I drive?" Kevin asked. Buffy laughed at his ambitious question, then shook her head in amusement.

"Maybe when you're thirty," Buffy said, pulling out of the parking lot.

********One o'clock in the afternoon. Buffy's house.**********

"Mommy!!!! Mommy!!!! I missed you so much," Kevin said, running up the stairs to hug his mother.

"Hey sweety....how was Mexico?" Willow asked her son.

"Oh man....it was the best!!! I got to ride horses, and rollercoasters, and I got to dye Toby's hair,"

"You dyed Toby's hair?" Willow asked her son.

"Yep...and you won't believe what color I dyed it,"

"Uh...black?"

"No."

"Brown?"

"No," Kevin said in a voice that told Willow she was nowhere close, and that he was going to make her keep guessing until she guessed right.

"White?"

"Un uh," Kevin said shaking his head.

"Red?"

"No!!!! Why would I dye his hair red when it's already red?"

"Well why don't you tell me what color you dyed it, and then I won't have to guess any more,"

Kevin giggled. "I dyed it sky blue!!!!" Kevin said, laughing so hard his face was turning redder than usual.

"You didn't!!!! Wait a minute..you must have...its all over the back of your head....Kevin," Willow said in an unbelieving tone that suggested annoyance.

"Would I lie to you?" Kevin asked.

"Well I don't know...you are getting to that age," Willow said, in a skeptical motherly voice, while inspecting his roots.

"Well anyway....ooohh!!! Guess what...I ran into an old friend of yours when Aunt Buffy and I got off the plane," Kevin said excitedly.

"Oh really...who was it?"

"I don't know," Kevin said, slightly upset because he didn't know the man's name. "I think Aunt Buffy knows though. I'll go get her," Kevin said racing down the stairs...."Aunt Buffy!!!"

"Yes Kevin?"

"What was that man's name...the one you were talking to?" Kevin asked.

"Why?" Buffy asked with a skeptical and worried eye.

"Because Mommy wants to know," Kevin said, sitting down and wrapping his arms around Buffy's leg so she would have to drag him up the stairs. At his words, Buffy instantly froze.

"Kevin, I really wish you hadn't brought that up with your mother," Buffy said in a melancholy tone.

"Well how was I supposed to know? You made me play with the little kids at the playground while you talked to him," Kevin said, uncaring. Buffy squatted down, and met Kevin eye to eye.

"Kevin...I'm not mad at you....but I think you should stay downstairs while I go talk to your mother...There is a play station hooked up to the TV, with your favorite video games," Buffy said, ruffling his hair. She finally stood up when Kevin let go of her leg, and he started running towards the living room. Buffy walked up the stairs, not really sure how she wanted to approach the subject.

"Hey Buffy...what happened to Kevin?" Willow asked, throwing a few clothes in the dryer.

"I told him to play Nintendo while you and I talked about this mysterious friend of yours that Kevin happened to bump into," Buffy said uneasily. Willow's eyes widened as she grew impatient.

"Well who was it?" Willow asked. Buffy averted her eyes, not able to look into Willow's when she told her that her son had met his father, and his father knew he was the father, at the airport. Willow continued to grow more impatient. "You know...sometime today would be nice," Willow said eyeing her friend with cautious eyes.

"It was Oz," Buffy mumbled. Willow leaned in closer to make out what Buffy had just said.

"You want to repeat that?" Willow asked.

"Oz!!!" Buffy said in a harsh breath. Willow paled immediately

"Buffy...please...tell me you're kidding," Willow said, panicked. At the shake of her best friend's head, Willow immediately wanted to die...What did Oz think of him? Did he even care? Did Oz like him? Did Kevin like Oz? Her son obviously seemed pretty enthused about the whole situation. Did Kevin know?

"Kevin was running up and down the escalators and apparently he bumped into him....then Oz saw Kevin over at the baggage claim with me, and he wigged. He knew,Willow. He knew Kevin was your son," Buffy said.

"Well did he say anything?" Willow asked. Any news was better than no news. Buffy let out a long sigh.

"Yes...unfortunately...he...admitted that what he said to you about hating you was wrong," Buffy said in a voice that dignified a 'but'.

"But?" Willow asked, understanding Buffy's uneasy voice.

"But he said that that's the way he felt and that you asked," Buffy said sadly. At the look on her best friend's face, she too wanted to burst into tears. There was about three minutes of silence between the two until Willow spoke up.

"Well...its over...and he doesn't want anything to do with me, so...I guess I move on," Willow said, wiping her tears away with the silk screen shirt she wore over her spaghetti strap shirt.

"Oh god Wills. I'm so sorry," Buffy said, crying harder than she did when she first saw the Titanic. She reached out to grab Willow's hand, but Willow brushed it off and ran down the stairs, obviously trying to avoid the issue at hand. She ran towards the downstairs bathroom, and closed the door, double locking it. Buffy was right behind her, knocking on the door, begging Willow to come out.

"Willow...please come out. You're scaring me. It will be okay. I know it will. You two..had a fight, and it ended badly...it's not the end of the world. It's not the end of your life. You've got the greatest kid in the world Willow. What more could you possibly want?" Buffy rationalized. There was a slight rustling in the bathroom, and then the door opened with a tear streaked Willow in the way.

"I can't do this Buffy," Willow said crying. Buffy opened her arms, and Willow greeted them timidly. She lay her head on her best friend's shoulder.

"Sure you can," Buffy coaxed. "You can do anything," Buffy said, stroking her hair. "So what? He's just a guy, who doesn't know what he's missing out on, because he is too ignorant a bastard to see what he's really got. You've got Kevin, Willow. You guys made it together for five years with out that..that...that arrogant son of bitch," Buffy said, doing her best to comfort her friend. It only made her cry harder.

"I can't help it. I love Kevin so much, and I know that five years ago, you said I was the most unselfish person in the world," Willow shaking her head, and soaking her best friend's t-shirt.

"You're still...nowhere near being selfish," Buffy said, with tears in her eyes. Willow started sobbing harder, and shaking her head in denial.

"No...that's not true. I'm a selfish bitch. I want Oz!! I want Kevin. I want my parents. I want my old life back Buffy. I want things to be okay between us...and I want, Kevin to grow up, loving his dad as much as I did. I want him to actually know his dad. He's five years old Buffy. It doesn't mean that much to him now...but deep down I know that he's going to end up hating me because of what I did. He's going to hate me because its my fault that he never knew his dad, and then he's going to hate his dad because he never knew him," Willow cried, slipping from Buffy's hold, and sitting down on the cold tile floor of the bathroom. She lay down, pressing her cheek against the off white marble, trying to find some way to alleviate the nauseating feeling she got, when she thought of the situation she got herself into.

"But it's not your fault Willow. You didn't have a choice. Your parents made you break up with him. It's not your fault Willow. It's not your fault. You didn't know you were pregnant until after you made your choice. You were scared," Buffy said, rubbing her back. "You thought he would hate you because you broke up with him. You didn't want him to hate you more for telling him he had a son, because you were afraid he might be seeing someone else. I don't blame you okay. You're human. You're allowed to make mistakes, and if he can't get over the fact that you made a mistake, then he isn't worth it and you know it!" Buffy said. "He's upset because he missed five years of his son's life because you were afraid to tell him. But for every day he misses now...is his fault. Okay...he knows he has a son now. It's not your fault. Yeah...okay...Oz missed five incredible years of his son's life...but it's not your fault if he ends up missing the next 50," Buffy said. It got Willow to let out a small laugh. Buffy smiled a little bit.

"Damn Buffy...sounds like you actually knew this conversation was coming," Willow said sniffling. Buffy grinned at that.

"Well I've had time to practice since I last saw him there...because in a way I sort of said the same thing to him, that I said to you. Only I was meaner when I was talking to him, and I was so mad at him, I put dents in the wood railing that I was holding on to," Buffy said with a bit of humor and triumph in her voice. She really did enjoy that little speech she gave to Oz. It made her feel better than staking a vampire, but that was probably because she didn't stake him and she didn't get any ashes on her shoes.

"What did he say?" Willow asked, somewhat calmed down because of her best friend's presence.

"He said that in a very long time, he could forgive you.....but...he wouldn't be able to forget," Buffy said, stroking the back side of Willow's left hand.

"Is he ever going to talk to me?" Willow asked. Buffy, felt a pang go through her heart, knowing that what Willow needed was answers, but she had none to offer. Sitting down, she leaned forward to place a kiss on the back of Willow's head, and immediately began stroking her hair again.

"You know he will one day Willow. You know he will," Buffy said.

"You want to know what hurts the most though?" Willow asked.

"I'm all ears."

"I don't think I can blame my parents any more for the bad things that go on in my life. The thing that hurts the most is that I'm the reason all of this really happened. I had a choice. I chose to leave him. And I hate myself a thousand times more, every time I think about it," Willow said lifting her head.

"Shhhh..." Buffy coaxed. "It's going to be alright. Just give it some time,"

"I want to get out of here," Willow said. "I hate SunnyDale. I hate it here..." Willow cried.

**********************Los Angeles, California**************

"Good afternoon, Mr. Henry," Oz said, shaking the lawyer's hand.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Larkin. I'm sorry to inconvenience you, but we found some items that your mother's will referred to, and she really wanted you to have them," the lawyer said, pulling out a huge manilla envelope.

"What would those be?" Oz asked, sitting down in the huge chair and crossing his legs. The man sitting across from him handed him an envelope. Oz opened it, and the lawyer read off the list that the envelope contained.

"She wrote you a letter, left you a ring that supposedly belonged to your father, by the looks of it, a golden 1976 Rolex, a tape, and as you already know, all rights to the land near Sycamore lake, only this is actually in writing," Oz nodded his head and stood up to sign the statement saying that he received what his mother requested. He walked outside, and out to his car where he could read the letter in private. Inside the letter, was three photographs. The letter read:

*****************************

Tears wetted the letter he held in his hand. He kept interrogating his mind, trying to find some recollection, of a time when he didn't live with Chase. He simply just couldn't remember. After all it had been 25 years. Shaking his head in denial, he stepped out of the car, kicking buckets and rocks as he made his way to a fitness club across the street. He remembered buying a membership up there, he just never found the energy to go. He was dressed to work out. Why not? He could work out some of his aggression. His aggression towards Willow, his aggression towards his mother, and towards himself.

There was something he just couldn't understand though, and it really bothered him. He didn't hate his mother, the way he hated Willow. He just couldn't understand why. Maybe it was because his father did know about him before he was born, and he didn't know about Kevin until the kid was five. Or maybe it was because he didn't understand why Willow never told him. Willow of all people, should have known that he would have been thrilled at the news, but she still didn't tell him.

He started punching dents into the punching bag, flashbacks of the previous years running through his eyes. He remembered his first movie, which was with Chase. He remembered the first time he cut himself while trying to shave his non-existent mustache, which was with Chase's razor. He remembered his first broken arm, his first crush, his first love. Buffy's speech from the airport kept pounding in his head.

Flashback:

"You're right Oz. You missed five incredible years of his life because of Willow. But now it's going to be your fault when you miss the next 50 because you refuse to forget. You're going to be the person he hates the most because he never knew the person his mother refused to stop loving," Buffy said.

End Flash back:

*****

She had such a disappointed look on her face. He remembered how much it hurt him every time she called him a bastard on the account of Willow. Because he knew what she said was true. He was a bastard. He couldn't forgive Willow for what she did. He despised everything about her. Even when he saw her smile in his vision, he wanted to break something. He punched the bag harder, causing his knuckles to pop in unwanted areas. He knew he was going to have bruises in the morning. He somewhat doubted that he'd be able to drive in his state of mind. He was also afraid that he'd become homicidal. He continued to punch the bag, nearly knocking it off of its rings which suspsended it in the air. After about 20 minutes of beating the lifeless object, he collapsed against the wall, breathing fast and sweating.

Looking up, he noticed a bunch of people staring at him in wonder. Giving them an annoyed glare, he stood up and went upstairs to shower.

He remembered the pictures he saw in Willow's room. The ones of Willow and Kevin at the beach. The ones of Kevin at the petting zoo. The picture of his son when he was born. A ghost of a smile swept across his face at the memory. Then a scowl appeared across his face, when he remembered that he wasn't there to take the pictures because Willow never told him. He hated her because he loved her. He hated her because he loved her, and she betrayed him. She gave birth to his son, and he had to find out from a pager.

He hated her because he loved her.