{17082001}Tonight, I called an old friend of mine and went to have a drink with her. Lien and I used to be very close for one or two years at the age of 13, 14 then, for reasons I think neither of us would be able to formulate, grew apart. I changed school soon and we had hardly seen each other ever since. But tonight we met up again, and it was a most pleasant experience. We found we both had changed in some way, but still shared these same interests and opinions and passions which had made us cling together at the time. I guess we have just both grown up - each of us in a total different direction, I must admit this, but the intimacy, the understanding, it was all still there and it only took a glance at each other and an embrace to rediscover it.
She had brought pictures of friends from my old school. It was nice to see how each one of them had evolved since the past few years. I kept going "Oh look, thats her" and "Gosh, I remember him" and "What is she planning to do, will I see her and her and her again next year?"
It looks like I will. It will be odd. I can't stop asking myself what they will think of me.Lien was picked up by her brother quite early. After she had left, I spent the rest of a from then on rather dull evening with the people who would be taking me home, at some vague point in the near or far future.
I don't know what it is, but sometimes I just don't have *anything* to say. Do you know that feeling? You are in a cafe, packed with people; you look around and find the company you are in consists of nothing but interesting people. Well, you know they are not all that interesting, but at that time, that place, they appear to be endlessly funny, self-conscious and articulate. They reply each question, each tease with the rapidity of a soap star. And their words just fit, they make sense, everyone goes "hahaha" and you spin the bottle of smirnoff ice round and round in your hands and realize you don't even like that drink anymore. And you ask yourself what you are doing here.
I guess I'm better with personal, more intimate kind of talks. I am often amazed how easily people tell me about their personal lives.
Just before we left, at 2am-ish, I had a quite nice talk with a boy I until then had hardly ever spoken to. The usual stuff, relationships, exes, disappointments & expectations, you know. It made me feel better about my social skills :)3am. I've just spilled some juice/gin on my skirt. Time to go to bed now.
*
on my mind today:
"once I was mistaken for a different fool
man I could never tell if it was wrong or true
till now"
Zita Swoon, 'She=like meeting Jesus'*
music:
Zita Swoon, very loud on the way to work.
Friday night is usually 'gothic/dark wave night' in the cafe I was, but it seemed tonight the dj was in a funky mood. I never knew "freestyler" was eighties.*