Only for You

The Quintessence of My Daidouji-san continues...

*****

I stared at the picture in my desk.Drops of royal violet are her eyes,and they shined most beautifully,like a precious amethyst.I swear I could see the entire night skies in her.
The velvety black tresses.The mauve stars twinkling in her eyes.The radiant porcelain skin that glowed a perfect platinum.
My silent veneration of an earth tenshi.
Tomoyo Daidouji.
She is the sunshine that came to my life and kissed my sadness away.She chased away the shadows of doubt and loneliness in my heart.She is my silver lining.She is everything good in my life.
She taught me to laugh when I thought that I could never smile again.She taught me to look forward to the surprises of the future when I thought that tomorrow was just created to replace yesterday in a routine.She taught me so much about life I never knew about when I thought I already knew too much to be happy.
In my life,she is the best thing that was ever given by the Divine Providence.Even with Kaho,I never felt this kind of happiness.
But does she know that?
Of course not.
Is she aware of my feelings?
Of course not.
Have I tried telling her about them?
Of course not.
How can I tell her that my everyday is all about being with her?And that I can never call my day complete without seeing her?
Can I dare tell her how she fills up my every thought when I'm awake,and my every dream when I'm asleep?
Can I will myself to tell her that ever since she came into my life,I was never the same again?
Daidouji-san,I tried to program myself to think thrice before acting upon something,and reflect on it afterwards thrice more.But you came in,Daidouji-san,and wrecked my three times three rule.You rocked my whole system,rendered me helpless and made me fall in love with you without so much your lovely smile and the mere mention of my name with your sweet angelic voice.I was defenseless against your disarming smiles.I never got to think why I fell for you.All I know is that I want to be with you always.
Was it a bewitching spell?A curse?A love potion?
All it took to destroy the cool calm unaffected persona I guarded for TWO lifetimes is you.
You.Only You.
Kimi dake ni.
Yet it's ok to surrender my safe solitude to you,Daidouji-san...
...because I love you so.

****************

"Hiragizawa-kun?"whispered Tomoyo,her voice trembling.
"Daidouji-san?"I said slowly as I looked up from my Math book.What is she doing in my room?
"Will it be ok if I stay here for a while?"she asked.
"Of course.You're welcome here anytime you wish to come."I closed the book I never really read and offered her a seat in front of me.
She didn't take it.She knelt in front of me and burst into tears.She cried on my lap.
"I-I feel..s-so evil,Hiragizawa-kun.I saw Sakura and Li awhile ago,a-and they greeted me.B-But I said those nasty things.."She wiped her tears.I helped her.I stroked her tear-streaked cheeks with my thumb.God,she was no less beautiful.
"I hate myself.Why can't I be happy for Sakura?I-I'm so..selfish.."She wept all over again.

Kimi ga namida ni yureru toki
Dou sureba iin darou
Sora wa miagetemo
Kokoro ga itai..

(When you did nothing but cry,I was also lost.I gazed up at the sky and my heart was in pain..)

"Daidouji-san,you are also human.It's only right that you feel that way."I said soothingly."Stop crying now."Every tear drop she sheds felt like a spear pierced into my heart.

...Tonari ni iru dake de
Nani mo dekinai kedo
Arittake no egao kimi dake ni
Kakaete okuruyo donna toki mo....

(I'm just beside you and yet I can't do anything.And for you only I will give you the gift of my happiness...)

I cupped her face and kneeled beside her."Ssh,it's ok.I'm here for you,Daidouji-san.Kimi no tame dake ni,my dearest."
Only for you.

....Shinjite ii yo yume wa yatterkuru
Kimi no tame dake ni
Naitemo ii yo donna kanashimi mo
Tsubasa ni kawaru no sa sono mune de

(....You believe your dreams are coming true,but only for you.You can cry because you can make any sadness into wings of your heart.)

She rested her head wearily on my shoulder and shut her eyes tight.
I could feel the weight of her troubles along with her head on my yoke.I wrapped her around my embrace and rocked her rhythmically,lulling her to rest.
"Why are you so kind to me?"she asked in a whisper."Do you pity me?"
"No."I murmured.
"Then why are you doing this to me?"she asked insistently.
I chose to say no more.
"Eriol-kun?"She lifted her eyes towards me.
"You should know by now,Daidouji-san."I replied softly.
Then before I could stop myself and my temporary insanity,I brushed my lips against hers lovingly.
A kiss that poured out all of my feelings to her.The kiss that meant everything for me.
A special kiss meant only for you,Daidouji-san.
Kimi no tame dake ni.
Only for you.

*************

The song used here is an RK song..the 2nd ending theme entitled Namida wa Shitteiru.(I was kinda inspired by my idol's own work with RK songs..check out Ekai Ungson's series of E+T oneshots featuring..uh..what's the name of the band again?Well,the bottom line is I DO NOT OWN THE SONG,NEITHER THE KAWAII CHARACTERS OF CCS!*sniffs*I wish I'm a CLAMP member too.