The Mighty Duck's Love Line

Well, sorry everybody, but this thingy won't allow me to create links, so if you wanna get back to The Mighty Duck's ALL ACCESS Zone I guess you'll have to press browser back or punch https://www.angelfire.com/MightyDucks16 into your URL box. Sorry for the inconvenience! = )

Remember, that number is 555-DIVE (which is the same as 555-3483)

• NOSE DIVE: Welcome, all you love crazed Mighty Duck fans, to the MIGHTY DUCKS LOVE LINE! Where your main mallard o' love will give you tips on dating!
• MALLORY: You mean you're letting Wild Wing host it?
• NOSE DIVE: Well, I- HEY! Get the hell outta here Mallory this is my big break! Phil practically BEGGED me to do this show!
• MALLORY: You volunteered, remember?
• NOSE DIVE: PHIL! GET HER OUTTA HERE! Sorry 'bout that folks, just another unfortunate fan tryin' to get a piece of the Dive! Now then! On to the questions! Caller #1 you're on the air!!
• CALLER #1: Uh, yeah, I'd like a pepperoni pizza with extra cheese and a-
• NOSE DIVE: Wrong number. NEXT CALLER!
• CALLER #2: This is the Mighty Ducks Love Line?
• NOSE DIVE: You got it, girly-girl! Got a question for me?
• CALLER #2: Yeah, is it possible to have a relationship between a duck and a human?
• NOSE DIVE: Damn straight!
• CALLER #2: Well, in that case, is your brother single?
• NOSE DIVE: WHAT?! Look you demented human, I-
• GRIN: Peace, Nose Dive.
• NOSE DIVE: Grin, what are you doing in here?! I'm in the middle of a show!
• GRIN: Sorry, I was just wondering if you knew why Mallory is making a call from the pay phone across the street.
• NOSE DIVE: She's WHAT?! That bleached red headed bitch! I'll kill her...
• GRIN: Well, now that he's out of the way, welcome to Grin's Love Line. Next caller?
• CALLER #3: Yeah, Grin? I got this problem. You see, there's this girl in my school that I've wanted for the longest time and she doesn't know I exist. What should I do?
• GRIN: Why don't you try meditating?
• CALLER #3: You mean that stuff really works?
• GRIN: Works for me. Either that or you could try Nose Dive's method.
• CALLER #3: And what's that?
• GRIN: Come to school in nothing but your boxers.

• AMBER: You mean he really did that?!
• GRIN: Ladies and gentleman (most of which probably aren't listening to this show) I'd like you to meet my guest host, Amber!
• AMBER: Sweet! WHUZZUP NEXT CALLER!
• CALLER #4: Yeah, uh, hi. This is a question for that Amber chick. I've watched your show a bit and I've been wondering why don't you take your shirt off again?
• AMBER: NEXT CALLER PLEASE! And no more questions about me.
• CALLER #5: Wow, I, like, totally love your show, man, it's like, so cool, y'know?
• GRIN: yes, we like, know.
• CALLER #5: Oh yeah, well I was just like, wondering if Nose Dive was single, y'know? 'Cause he like totally turns me on.
• AMBER: He's mine so lay off!
• CALLER #5: YOU?! What does he see in a scrawny little kid like you?
• AMBER: I dunno, but probably less than he'd see hangin' out of your shirt right now, you stupid bimbo. NEXT CALLER!
• GRIN: Do I sense a cat fight coming on?
• AMBER: SHUT UP! One more call like that and I'm leaving!
• CALLER #6: Is this the Mighty Ducks Love Line?
• GRIN: Why yes, it is.
• CALLER #6: THEN YOU'D BETTER PRAY I DON'T FIND YOU WHEN I GET BACK YOU KARMA MUNCHIN' JERK!
• GRIN: Oopsie. I guess Nose Dive didn't fall for my little scheme as well as I thought he did.
• AMBER: AHHHHHHH!!!!
• GRIN: Well, there goes Amber...and here comes my next guest host!
• TANYA: Grin, I just saw Nose Dive walk in carrying a chainsaw.
• GRIN: Oh, don't worry about him. How'd you like to be my guest host?
• TANYA: Forget it Grin, you know I hate radio stunts.
• GRIN: Oh, fine. See you in my room later tonight then?
• TANYA: Grin! Not on the air...

• GRIN: Okay, okay, later sweetie. Caller, you're on the air.
• CALLER #7: Hey Grin, I just heard that conversation between you and Tanya and I was wondering...is she good?
• GRIN: She certainly is, but you'd better not put any moves on her 'cause I'll find you and beat your head in if you do.
• CALLER #7: No problem, man.
• MARA: Grin, I don't think you're supposed to be threatening your callers.
• GRIN: Well, if it isn't Mara Jade! Now you can be my guest host!
• MARA: I dunno, after the way they beat Amber up...Well, fine, but no questions concerning me.
• GRIN: Good deal. All right then, next caller?
• CALLER #8: Hey guys, I've just got a general question about Wild Wing on the show...Why does he hit on all the girls?
• GRIN: Easy. First of all, the audience loves it, especially since the numbers on the team even out to 4 boys and 4 girls. And, he's just horny, that's all.
• MARA: Does he really hit on us?
• GRIN: Yes, but mostly Mallory and Amber. I'd kill him if he hit on Tanya, and he doesn't seem to torment you that much.
• WILD WING: That's just because I'm scared of Duke.
• MARA: Very funny, Wild Wing, the ladies have been asking for you.
• WILD WING: Yeah, so I've heard. Guess I'm just irresistable, right Mara?
• MARA: You wish, Wing.
• DUKE: And you'd better stop wishing 'cause I know where you live.
• GRIN: Now things are getting intresting.
• DUKE: Forget it, Grin, I didn't come so your audience can ask me uncomfortable questions, I just wanted to warn you that Nose Dive's coming down the hall way right now. Even Amber couldn't stop him!
• GRIN: Uh oh, well, in that case I think we'd better go now. Good night everybody!
• WILD WING: Since I'm not really in the mood to have severe head injuries inflicted on me, I think I'd better get going too. Good bye ladies, I hope you can bear life without me!
• DUKE: Wild Wing, I think your brother's finally starting to get to your head. Either that or you're on some kind of drugs. Coming, Mara?
• MARA: Yeah, just one last thing to all the girls out there. Remember, boys are like floor tiles, if you lay them out right then you can walk all over them for the rest of your life! Bye everybody!
• NOSE DIVE: A HA! Now I've got you- hey, they all left! Dammit! Well, that looks like just about all the time we have, so later all you love sick fans and here's a piece of advice: love bites.