We looked at the menus and decided what we were going to eat. We called for the waiter.
"Blah, blah, blah, blah ,blah," said the waiter speaking in French. We didn't understand a word he said.
"Huh?" my dad asked.
"Say it again," said the waiter in a bad English accent.
"Um..I'd like a steak and a coffee,"said my dad.
"Say it again," asked the waiter again leaning towards my dad.
It was a obvious the waiter didn't know English, so my dad started talking really slowly and pointed on the menu what he wanted to eat.
"Okay. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah," said the waiter in French.
A waiter with a bald head walked by and the idiot waiter who didn't know English stopped him. He said something in French which was probably meant that he needed that waiter to take his table for him because he didn't know English. But the other waiter said he was busy and couldn't help. So the idiot waiter continued to take our orders.
"I'd like a limonade and the clam stew for kids," I said.
"Huh? Say it again,"said the waiter in a very obnoxious manner.
I pointed to the menu to what I wanted. I rolled my eyes. All waiters or waitresses in France are supposed to learn English so when tourists come they can take their orders. This waiter obviously never took English lessons. What an idiot.
"Oh!" said the idiot waiter in a kid like way.
"I'd like the same as my husband," said my mom.
"Huh? Say it again?" said the waiter.
My mom pointed to the menu to what she wanted. I hate this waiter. Why couldn't we get a better waiter who actually learned English?
"And we'd like some red wine,"said my dad.
"Huh? Say it again,"said the waiter.
"How do you say red wine in French?" asked my mom. "Oh yeah, Noaqua,"said my mom who thought in French meant not water, so the waiter would understand she meant wine. But Noaqua was actually a Spanish word. Gee, how dumb could this waiter be?
Still the waiter didn't understand what we were saying, so we just gave up with the wine buisness.
The waiter left finally with our orders. He wiped the sweat off his face which he had gotten when he tried to figure out what we were saying.
After 20 minutes of waiting for our food we finally got our food and finished it quickly. While we waited for the waiter to come back, me and my dad played this retarded game called the animal game where you pick an animal and the person can only guess 20 questions about the animal then guess what the animal was.
After awhile, my dad saw there were still more clams in my bowl and told me to finish it. i said no so my dad ate it. The waiter was going to take our plates away until he saw my dad eating.
"Oh well," said my dad. "He's not going to take our plates. Let's continue to play the animal game."
Soon I became really bored with the animal game and we stopped.
"Hey I still see some clams in your soup. Eat them, Shirley," my mom said.
"No," I said.
"Then I'll eat them, " said my mom when the waiter was coming back to take our plates.
"I'll guess we'll have to wait another 20 minutes for our plates to be taken away and to get the check," I said. "Let's not eat anymore. Okay?"
So now we just sat there looking around the restaurant and I saw the desert menu. I read it. I wanted chocolate moose.
Finally the waiter came and saw we were done our dinner. He took our plates away.
"Desert?" he asked in English.
"Chocolate moose," I said.
"Blah, blah, blah, blah," said the waiter which sounded like the word chocolate moose.
I was so happy. This was the first time he had understood what one of the English words meant.
When the waiter came back again and passed us, my dad said,"Remember chocolate moose."
"Yeah, I know, I know," said the waiter in a frustrated tone.
That was good for a start. He knew what my dad was saying at least.
Finally I got my chocolate moose. It was very good. I got chocolate all over my mouth.
The waiter gave us the check. In France all the checks include the tips for the waiters. We gave the exact amount and didn't leave any bonus tips for the waiter because he had done a very nasty job of serving us. I hope we never go to that restaurant again.
And now back to home
