The Great Chicken

1) After taking Europe easily, and because of they all hate each other, I will have some fun (and sick) humor with them. I will first use about a couple thousand people of each country and put them in a large hole. There they will battle it out with jagged sticks and sharp rocks. Each country will keep sending in people until there is none left, and only Americans and people who I want in the future.

You would expect the following:

• The French would surrender ten minutes into the event.
• The Spanish would just lose horribly, hands down.
• England would be yelling, "BLOODY PRICK!" to everyone, I'd through rocks at them and hear them say, "O MY BUM!"
• The Russians would go into the event unorganized, and humiliate themselves ... again.
• The Italians would lose by trying to organize themselves. Read your history, they haven't accomplished this task since 476 AD.
• The Germans would probably win, they are the only people in Europe who can prove themselves. Too bad their language is ugly.

2) I will combine all the islands in the Pacific to make one large island. This will be my palace. I will use the Chinese way and close it off to all people, and use tanks and 50mm guns to defend it.

3) By the way, the people who I like are as follows:

• Japanese -- They are the second greatest civilization.
• Mexicans -- We kicked their ass in a war, this is out of sympathy.
• Colombians -- They make coffee, gotta have that.
• Austalians -- They make beer, we GOTTA have that!
• Indoneasians -- We have to able to laugh at a country, so I pick them.
• Irish -- We have to keep whiskey sours going.

4) To ensure world domination and the spread of pro-Chickenism culture, I will out-law all currency. Too many problems will arise. Education will go too. Generation-X could care less about it. I know it, you know it. Instead of high school and college, I will have them work in factories making chicken products of some sort. Since there is no money, how do I pay them you ask? With beer and sex of course! I'll clone today's hotties, so no one is left out. What would you rather have, hard work and little money or shag rotten everyday with a hangover? Hmmm. That's a toughy.