My little sister turned 13 on Saturday past. She believes, and has believed for some time, that she is taller than me. She is wrong, of course, because I am the elder sister and therefore I am taller, have always been taller, and will continue to be taller until the day they chop my legs off.

Being an infuriating child, she insists that she is taller. She wants me to stand back to back with her, or near one place on the wall where she has marked her ehight, so she can "prove" to me that she is taller. I'm sure she'll stand on her tiptoes, or that she drew the mark two inches high on the wall than her true height.

And, to make it worse, my parents believe this outrageous claim! My mother gloats about no longer being "the short person," and my father, I know, is conspiring with my sister to prove my supposed lack of height.

My sister even came up with a nickname, which she now forgets to call me. "VCP," as in "vertically challenged person."