"Don't use God as a cover for your stupidity."-Bob Burch
"After all, who is going to remember you in twenty years if you just 'fit in.'" -Rebecca Wagner
"Talk about a porkchop at a bar mitzvah." -Rex Mathie
"Take an unsaved man and put him in water [baptizing him] and all you've done is made him wet." -Rex Mathie
"Nevertheless... Afterwards." -Rex Mathie
"I'm going to hell. Boy, I have a positive outlook on life." -Rex Mathie
"Some people think they know everything just because they were born." -Bob Burch
"Worry is like a rocking chair... it gives you something to do, but gets you nowhere." -Tom Fethe
"In the end, when it's all said and done, Jesus wants us for his reward... us! -Dan Riley Probably the most sticky thing he's ever said. At least, it stuck with me.
"You deserve to go to Hell! Anything else would be good." -Dan Riley
"Be Jack and Jill before you're Romeo and Juliet."-Dan Riley
"...because we are not on Kingston Pike. But anyway, that's in the original Greek." -Tom Fethe Luke 9:12
"I'm gonna Veggie your Tale." -Emily Hall
"This was a bad ideeeeaaaah!" -Rachel Lane
"You're not terminally unique. You're just a cow in the herd." -Dan Riley Boy, isn't that encouraging. Hehe, just kidding.
"I got this loose jello, okay?" -Pepe
"Build a jacuzzi, okay?" -Pepe
"The Holy Spirit said,'You misspelled my name.'"-Jarrod Edwards
"When I finished at arson newman, I was a virgin. I mean, I was so crazy about having sex with my wife, that I saved money all during college. Cause I didn't plan on working for the first two years after I got married. You know why?" -Lucas Heard
"I mean, God invented sex! He was like, 'I got Adam. I got Eve. I'll put 'em together. Hehe, you're gonna like this!" -Lucas Heard
"Well, butter my butt and call me a biscuit!"-Kurt Taylor
"It's a win-win situation. If Dubya wins, we win. And if Gore wins, it just means the Lord's coming back soon."-J.C. Oakley
"It rhymes with 'usan's ather.'" -Jarrod Edwards
"Grab a seat." "It's a Baptist church, grab your own." -Travis Rucker and Jarrod Edwards
"If you obey God, He's going to reward you. He'll say, You ran the good race, here's your chocolate." -Aaron Matthews
"Well, you know what they say about great minds... we've got 'em!" -Jarrod Edwards
"Excuses are like noses. Everybody's got one!" -Jarrod Edwards
"Some things in life have to suck, and that's gotta be one of them." -Jarrod Edwards
"It's not worth it. You'll only break your legs. You must go higher."-Jarrod Edwards
"When being 'all you can be' isn't enough." -Jarrod Edwards
"Cry me a river, so we can build a bridge and get over it." -Jarrod Edwards
"I'll knock the yellow off your teeth!" -J.C. Oakley
"I'd rather have three-fourths of a Susan, than no Susan at all." -Joe Drummer Aww, I feel so loved.
"Scott takes his little turn on the catwalk." -Susan Anderson
"I'm paying attention. I'm multi-tasking. What?" -Jarrod Edwards
"It's all about character." "Yeah, but you gotta roll over and face 'character' every morning." -Jarrod Edwards and Susan Anderson
"I could be wrong. That happens a lot." -Jarrod Edwards
"Operation: Let my people go!" -Susan Anderson
"Dale, you're not a total 's'!" -Lisa Humphreys
"What'd I forget?" "Toothbrush?" -Tyler Hickman and Katie Simmons
"They should take down these signs that say no parking on Saturdays. We're Jewish; we don't even drive on Saturdays!" -Survey taker in Queens, NY
"You really didn't know that I'm half Chinese?" "Well, I knew you were short." -Mark Morrell and Andy Large
"Sally Anne's seen Aaron naked?" -Susan Anderson Don't think badly of her. I was just being mean, hehe.
"Life isn't about how many breaths you take, but how many moments take your breath away." "Did you just say breasts?" -Aunt Judy and Russ
"What time is it in Djibouti?" "It'd better be the same time!" "Heh, your momma's so fat..." -Susan Anderson and Emily Hall
"Sorry, my booty just caused a solar eclipse." -Jarrod Edwards
"D, Djibouti's in the way." - Susan Anderson
"There's just nothing incomplete about changing into your swimsuit." -Karen Adams
"Don't be anxious over your incecent exposure. Just lay it at the Lord's feet." "That's right. You don't have anything he hasn't seen before." "The Lord said, 'Wow! Didn't know you had that!'" -Scott Parks and Jarrod Edwards
"He looks good. He could pull that off. If you didn't know him." -Katie Simmons D, in a cowboy hat.
"No, write that in your book: D said, Susan looks good." -Jarrod Edwards
"Nothing like a good, healthy, double standard." -Jarrod Edwards
"Grab your prize." -Jarrod Edwards
"I've got a river of life flowing out of me." -Jarrod Edwards
"No! Your virgin eyes... you're so young... don't look!" - Jarrod Edwards
"None of my girlfriends buy me lingerie." -Jarrod Edwards
"What the billy-crap?" -Jarrod Edwards
"I can Pocahontas if you want me to." "I'm going to poke-your-hontas." -Karen Adams and Katie Simmons
"When you're walking through the desert, rowing your boat, how do you peel an orange? Purple, because jello has no bones." -Jack Handy
"Go show the world what we saw. Don't be afraid to let them see." -Aaron Matthews Yeah, so it's actually serious. It does happen... every now and then.
"Aaron, I don't need these blankets anymore."-Kristy Pickett
"Hey Kristy! If you can't blow it, pick it!" -Aaron Matthews
"Hi, sweetie." "Hi." "Hi." "Hi, but you can't call me sweetie." -Dan Riley, Kristy Pickett, and Tyler Hickman
"Just to let you know, the praise band is taking applications for Front Row Worshipper after this Sunday." -Barak Tjader about D, of course
"Stupid fat foot. The fat foot knows."-Susan Anderson
