Munkustrap was puzzling over the latest news the patrols had brought him about Macavity. So he can levitate? he mused. I wonder what else he can do.
With a gasp, Pouncival came racing into the Junkyard. His ears were plastered to his head and his fur was slick with fear. He stumbled over to Munkustrap, eyes wild.
"What is it?" the young leader called out, bounding over. He supported the young Tom as he led him over to the warm pillow he had just vacated.
"Macavity," the young cat gasped. "He disappeared."
"So?" said Demeter, who had come over to see what the commotion was. "He always does that."
"No, I saw him."
The little group of cats around him stared, shocked. "Saw him?" the Tugger asked, not really believing him.
Pouncival nodded. "Uh-huh. Just like Mistoffelees."
Everyone looked at the small, black and white cat, who had just now joined the conversation. He crouched, flattening his ears. "What'd I do now?" he asked no one in particular.
Bombalurina snorted. "That's right, Misto. Just think of yourself."
Jadadaye stepped in front of him. "We're not talking about him now,
we're talking about Macavity."
"He's here?" Mistoffelees asked, still confused.
Alonzo turned to him. "No! Now shut up!"
Jadadaye smacked Alonzo upside the head. "Be nice."
Munkustrap glared at all of them. "Will you all stop it?"
"Yes, Daddy," they chorused.
"Don't do that."
Pouncival looked around. "Do you want to hear what Macavity can do or not? Because I'm hungry and I need some sleep?" He started creeping for the exit.
Munkustrap put a paw on his tail. "Exactly HOW does Macavity disappear?"
"He disappears?" Victoria exclaimed, confused.
"Yes," Jadadaye said slowly. "That's why we are never able to FIND him."
"Oh," the white cat nodded.
Demeter looked at Pouncival. "Exactly how does he, Pouncival?"
"Like Misto?" Munkustrap added.
"No! He crossed his forepaws, nodded, and he was gone!"
Jennyanydots perked up. "Like Jeannie!"
"What?" everyone chorused.
"Who's that?" asked Cassandra, lazily yanking on Munkustrap's tail. He glared at her and Demeter stepped between them, hissing slightly at the Burmese.
"She's from I Dream of Jeannie. She's the genie," Jenny answered.
Etcetera gasped. "Macavity's a genie!" She then turned to the Tugger. "Did you hear that? I figured it out!"
The Tugger looked at her, on eyebrow raised. "Sure, kid," he agreed before turning back to the conversation going on in the middle.
"He must have a vase," Jenny was telling the others. "That's where genie's live."
"Rumpleteazer and Mungojerrie have a vase!"
Rumpleteazer looked at Mistoffelees. "So do you."
"Not anymore," Mungojerrie answered.
"Why not?" Bombalurina asked.
"Uh?" Mungojerrie stuttered. "Well, it wasn't my fault!"
"That's a first," Jellylorum muttered.
"Whose fault was it then?" Exotica asked.
"Ah? Munkustrap's?" Quaxo said innocently.
"What!?" Electra asked, confused.
"Well, you remember that bachelor party Mistoffelees had a while ago?" Ademetus asked.
"Yes?" Tantomile said slowly.
"Well, if you leave fruit juice out too long, it ferments," Pouncival said sheepishly.
"You got drunk!?" Demeter shrieked.
"It wasn't intentional?" the Tugger mumbled. "Skimbleshanks was just teaching us how to play poker, y'know, where every time you lose, you take a drink?"
Jennyanydots turned a disapproving eye on Skimbleshanks. "You were teaching them to gamble?"
"Uh?"
"That still doesn't explain Munkustrap and the vase," Jellylorum pointed out.
"Well, you see, Munkustrap gets a little silly when he's drunk?" Alonzo tried to explain.
"We TRIED to convince him he couldn't fly!" Tumblebrutus cried.
Demeter groaned and flopped over.
"And then Misto conjured up those ha?" Plato started, only to be quieted by the other Toms.
"Harem girls!?" Bombalurina shrieked.
"How did you guess?" Tugger asked dumbly.
"Oooooh!" Bombalurina yelled and began pummeling him with her fists.
"Harem girls?" Jadadaye snapped, turning on Mistoffelees.
"Uh? Munkustrap made me do it?" he tried.
"Munkustrap!" Demeter yelled.
"I was drunk?"
The Queens leapt on their mates, pummeling and scolding them. As this fray continued, a loud, deep voice commanded them to stop.
"Old Deuteronomy!" whispered Coricopat and Tantomile in unison.
The leader of the Jellicles slowly walked forward. "What's going on?" he rumbled. They quickly explained.
He glared at his prodigy. "I thought we decided to keep this part a secret, Munkustrap."
"You were there?"
"Yes, Jellylorum. Whose party do you think it was?" He grinned and then asked, "What brought up this discussion?"
Again, the Jellicles explained. Old Deuteronomy nodded. "Macavity a genie. I wonder if he dresses like the harem girls? ah. Those were lovely dancers, quite wonderful?"
"Duet!" Mistoffelees clapped his paws. "Focus!"
"What? Oh, yes, right, yeah? what were we talking about again?"
"Macavity being a genie?" Munkustrap said through clenched teeth. He was dearly trying to get them all to cooperate, but it just wasn't working.
"Oh, yeah. Okay."
Mistoffelees looked at the look-a-like partners in crime. "I'm sorry," he said gravely, trying to be serious. "Macavity is living in your vase."
"Not the Ming!" Rumpleteazer screamed in mock-horror. She flung herself to the ground, delicately holding a paw against her forehead.
Macavity came stomping into the Junkyard proper, fully decked out in harem girl attire, complete with the cute little curled shoes and a poofy blond ponytail that existed due to a nice, firmly attached, wig. "Yes, I live in the Ming," he growled ominously. "And it's rather cramped, so don't blame ME for my lousy attitude!"
The Jellicles just stared at him in shock, but whether it was the outfit or his appearance is still a mystery. Then, from the middle of the crowd there came a small chuckle.
As time passed and the rest grew quieter, the laughter grew stronger. The shocked cats parted like the Red Sea, revealing a small cat crying with mirth.
Jemima sat there, laughing hysterically, tears rolling down her kittenish cheeks. "Th-th-thi-this i-is th-the c-c-c-cat we'v-ve all b-b-b-been f-f-fear-r-ing?" she stuttered between gasps for air.
Macavity stared at her for a long moment, his eyes wide. The other Jellicles looked back and forth between the two, uncertain what was about to happen. "Are you laughing at me?" Macavity demanded finally.
Jemima merely nodded, holding her sides as she giggled. Macavity's lower
lip trembled and--
The Hidden Paw burst into tears. "You can't accept me just cause I'm different!" he wailed.
This, of course, caused more cats to start laughing -- nervously at first, but louder and stronger as they saw that Macavity was going to do nothing to them.
Macavity turned his back on them, sulking off with a stubborn pout. "I'm gonna tell my mommy on you!" he yelled back at the laughing Jellicles. "THEN you're gonna get it!" With those... ominous... words, he crossed his arms, nodded his head with a blink, and was gone.
They howled with laughter at this, spending many merry moments making
fun of the feared Napoleon of Crime.
Then a quiet voice spoke up, somehow cutting through the shouts and yells. "Guys... I think... we really hurt his feelings."
Everyone stopped and turned to look. Desperado was standing there,
looking at them expectantly.
"Y'all are so mean to him," she added harshly in her strange American accent. Green eyes narrowed as she glanced at each, boring into their souls with a single look. "So who's going with me to say sorry?"
Etcetera looked ashamed. "I'm in..."
"Good. You can come with us now then."
"Us?" the kitten asked.
Desperado nodded. "Us. Jada and Misto volunteered just right now." The last was pointed at named two with a glare that challenged them to say otherwise.
"Uhm..." Jadadaye mumbled, exchanging a look with Mistoffelees.
"Okay..." the Tom agreed, not seeing much other option, as neither of them wanted to find out what happened when you got Desperado angry.
"Great!" the masked cat hugged them, an insanely joyful grin on her face.
"Like we had a choice," Jadadaye grumbled, trying to squirm out of Desperado's grasp.
"Don't push it, kid," the American muttered back before bounding off for the exit of the junkyard. Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer -- remembering where Macavity lived -- raced after her. Mistoffelees and Jadadaye exchanged another look before running after the other three, with Etcetera panting to keep up with the older cats.
She arrived in Victoria Grove to find the other five in a tight circle, staring at an ugly piece of pottery.
"Macavity?" Desperado said plaintively. "Come out please?"
"No. You're mean."
"No shit I'm mean, but these cats want to apologize for laughing at you."
"NO!" came the muffled voice from the vase.
Desperado hit the pottery, emitting a loud clang. "You don't have a choice, either you come out or I break your house."
"Aw man," Rumpleteazer moaned. "Ya do tha', and 'e'll ge' 'n trouble. Agai'."
Macavity laughed. "See! You can't do anything to make me come out!"
The masked cat growled and started rocking the vase, trying to get it upside down. Jadadaye, seeing what she was going to do, stepped over to the other side and helped her turn it. The two flipped it upside down and a tiny little Macavity came tumbling out, growing as he hit the ground until he was normal-sized and pouting. "That wasn't very nice."
The two gave identical grins -- somewhat akin to the one he was sure most Jellicles associated with him.
"They're not nice," Misto explained, also grinning; though his was a far pleasanter one.
Jadadaye pouted, looking a great deal like Macavity at that moment - except she wasn't dressed as a harem girl. "You don't like me anymore, do you!?"
Quickly, Mistoffelees shook his head. "Of course I like you! You're just not nice. That's all."
"That doesn't make any sense!" she protested.
"I thought we were here to apologize..." Etcetera said.
The two turned on her, fur flying in the breeze they created. "We are!"
they chimed in chorus. "Right after Jada stops arguing," the tux added.
Jadadaye crossed her eyes at Mistoffelees. "YOU started it..." she grumbled.
Macavity stepped between them, their fight making him forget his own problems. "Stop it! Just kiss and make up now." He shoved the two of them closer, squishing them against one another.
"Hello," Mistoffelees said lamely, looking at Jadadaye. "Macavity, could you possibly... uhm... let go of us now?"
The napoleon of crime shook his head, a pout returning to his lips. "Not until you make up. I absolutely detest fighting."
Jadadaye looked at Mistoffelees. "I'm sorry." Glancing back at Macavity, she said, "Now will you let us go?"
"You have to mean it," Macavity replied stubbornly.
She sighed. "I did!"
"I don't believe you!"
"Hurry up or we'll be here all day," piped up Mungojerrie, sounding bored. Everyone else glared, sshing him. "Wha'?"
"They're trying to apologize and you went and interrupted them!" Rumpleteazer cuffed him on the head.
"I didn't do anything, why do I have to apologize?" Mistoffelees protested.
"She started it," Mistoffelees grumbled.
"And how are we supposed to say we're sorry if we shut up?" Jadadaye added cheekily.
Macavity threw his hands up. Literally. "Fine! Don't! Just don't complain to me when you get divorced."
Jadadaye and Mistoffelees both stared at him. "We aren't married..." Mistoffelees said.
"Okay then! That solves everything." He clapped his paws together expectantly. "Now why are you here?"
"We wanted to say that we are sorry for laughing at you," Etcetera said.
"Oh! That's all?" He smiled sweetly. "Apology not accepted."
"Okay!" Jadadaye said cheerfully. "Bye!" Desperado reached out and caught her by the scruff of the neck before she got far.
"Uh-uh." She turned back to the ginger genie. "We're staying here until you accept."
Mistoffelees tapped her on the shoulder. "Des? That's not exactly how apologies work..."
"Well, we tried!" Etcetera said cheerfully.
"So? We're staying right here until he accepts." Desperado plopped onto the ground with a determined countenance.
Macavity reached down, picked up the Ming vase, and walked off. "Fine!" he called over his shoulder. "I'll just be going then, hope you like it here!"
They stared after him, gaping in surprise. Mistoffelees could faintly hear Mungojerrie through his shock.
"We're in trouble... the vase is gone..."
Macavity turned as he stood at the horizon, sun silhouetting him like the hero in a cheesy western movie. "The end," he yelled back.
