Internet Home Of The Vast Right Wing Conspiracy
American people aren’t
stupid
“The American people aren’t stupid,”
President Obama said on Thursday — as he insisted that drilling for more oil on
U.S. territory is “not a strategy to solve our energy challenge.”
The president’s solution? Algae, for
one.
President Obama admitted today that he does not have a "silver
bullet" solution for skyrocketing gas prices, but he said
"you've got a bunch of algae out here," Obama said at the
University of Miami today. "If we can figure out how to make energy out of that,
we'll be doing alright".
Just pull in to your local 7-11 store and get 10 gallons
of pond scum, diet coke and a moonpie.
Other things he’s working on:
- Wind-powered cars. You
take a sail and stick it on the car and drive it around like a sail
boat!
- Perpetual motion cars.
Hook a car up to a perpetual motion machine and you can power it forever off
of a drop of the fuel of your choice!
- Idiocy
powered cars. This car runs on liberal idiocy. The idiocy contained in
#p2 on Twitter alone could
power every car in the world for centuries. Add in the idiocy spewed by people
on MSNBC and progressive websites and you’d never run out of fuel. Want to
fill up your car? Just drive down to your local Occupy protest and ask one of
the protesters about economics, this should provide enough fuel to power your
car for a year.
- Unicorn-fart powered
cars. Nothing in the universe contains more energy than unicorn farts; one
unicorn fart has enough energy to power a car for decades. We can harness this
power by capturing unicorns and making them eat bean and cheese burritos for
the rest of their lives and storing the resulting farts in
jars.
Newsletters are mostly Satirical Humor
Follow Us On Facebook Here
Back To Home Page Of RightWing Conspiracy Newsletters