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"she will stay young today"

  She lay there quietly on a soft bed of leaves, her complexion very pale in colour. I looked with sad hope. Gently, I brushed her still brilliant red hair away from her face with motherly love. Her once sharp blue eyes opened slowly and looked up to me pleadingly. The paleness that now filled her eyes begged for me to do something to save her ailing health. A single salty tear ran down my beet red cheek. My eyes bloodshot from the hours upon hours of waiting patiently by her side.
  I took her limp hand in mine carefully, fearing it would break in my grip. I held her chilly hand to my warm cheek, closing my eyes as I did so. More tears streaked down my face. She quietly closed her eyes in a meager attempt at sleep.
  Suddenly, my once vibrant little girl went into a fit of coughing that shook her tiny body violently. Fear filled me. Even the thought of losing my baby hurt me to my very core. I didn't know what I would do if I lost my pride and joy.
  "Please," I pleaded to Pythia, "is there anything you can do to save my baby?" My eyes pleading to hers as only a heart broken mother could.
  "I don't know," Pythia told me. "It doesn't look very good."
  "You helped me to bring her into this world," I begged. "Please, is there anything you can do to help me keep her here?" Tears began streaking from my eyes in massive amounts and my voice cracking with fear and sadness.
  Pythia took out many ointments and herbs from the pouch at her side. She began mixing and chanting in tongues I did not understand. I watched her work late into the night. I was hopeful that maybe, just maybe, one of her concoctions would save my baby's life.
  Thoughts of dread filled me. The thought that I might lose Andreya, my only child, filled me with pain. A fear that my God would take my baby just as swiftly as he had given her to me.
  Laehrin wrapped his strong arms around my tiny shoulders in a comforting embrace, my body shaking from the fear. He also watched fearfully as Pythia worked her magic on the child we both loved so dearly.
  My eyes moved around the room in a sad motion. I saw many elves present who cared as much for Andreya as both Laehrin and I did. Many of the familiar faces of the forest. It broke my heart to see all the love and fear that filled the clearing. I was comforted to see both Rhea and Korvikan present. The presence of both of my child's godparents moved me deeply. They kept silent and hidden among the trees; ready in case the forest called for them. My eyes continued around the area as I saw many more elves looking on. All feared for the life of my child, but none as fearful as I.
  My eyes slowly settled back on Andreya as she went into another fit of coughing. I gently rubbed her chest in hope that it would ease the pain in some way. My eyes were blurry with tears, but still I gazed at her with love. I was unable to remove my eyes from her. I started to fear that if I took my eyes away from her, even for a moment, that she would slip away and I would lose her forever.
  As I continued to watch Andreya lovingly, I pleaded to Pythia again. "Please," I begged, "is there nothing in your pouch that can save my baby?"
  Pythia frantically searched through her pouch for more possible solutions with little success. She sighed and shook her head sadly. "Only hope and prayer can save her now," Pythia said gloomily. "I have done all my powers have allowed me to do to save her."
  Slowly and carefully, I laid myself next to Andreya. I propped myself up on one hand and ran my other hand through her wilted hair. She gasped for air, rasping with each strained breath. I cried, unable to breath myself with each sob.
  The world around me faded off into the distance. All I saw in my space was my child and myself. I did not see Rhea or Korvikan fade into the trees. I did not see the other elves fade into the forest, or Pythia and Laehrin leave my side. All I knew was that my child was sick and there was nothing that I could do to help her.

  Laehrin moved silently through the woods, his daughter's well being weighing heavily on his thoughts.
  Coming upon a small clearing he stopped and sat at the edge, waiting.
  Soon enough a cloaked figure stepped out of the trees and Laehrin moved closer tomeet with him.
  "Come with me." Bihnx said, beckoning Laehrin to follow.
  Laehrin complied and followed Bihnx through the woods. Eventually they came to another clearing much deeper in the woods. A small bed of pine needles lay by a crackling fire, under a canopy of tall, ancient Evergreen trees, one with a small carving.
  "I have tried hard to forget this place Bihnx, why have you brought me here?" Laehrin asked quietly.
  "Stop trying to forget." Bihnx said, simply "Come home."
  Laehrin sighed heavily "Bihnx," he started to say.
  "Laehrin," Bihnx interrupted "you left for her, and she's gone. Come home, many of us miss seeing you in the hall of moons and Mhairi and Andreya need you more than ever now."
  "Yes," he replied "she is gone, and Mhairi and my child need me, but I cannot simply abandon the Gypsies, the gave me a home, and a family, what would happen to the Yellow family if I left?"
  "You had no problem abandoning us, and your real family." Bihnx responded sourly.
  "I did not abandon anyone." Laehrin responded "Well, my family yes, but certainly not the clan."
  "Never mind this for now," Bihnx said, handing a bundle of blankets to Laehrin "Take these back to Mhairi and Andreya, we will continue this later."
  Nodding Laehrin took the blankets and rushed off through the woods back to Mhairi and his beloved child Andreya.

  As the night wore on, I could see my child's life fade before my eyes. I was in constant prayer at her side, her father with me as well. I could see the fear in his eyes. I could tell he knew the inevitable.
  "What is it Laehrin? Why is it you are so quiet and hesitant to touch your own child? I asked him.
  "I have been haunted with dreadful images," he told me in a hushed tone.
  "What images do you speak of?" I asked, already knowing what his reply would be.
  "Images of darkness, a bleak future, of death," he murmured.
  I looked at him uncomfortably. I knew that what his instincts were telling him were true. He had had feelings like this before and they had come true.
  "Please. . ." my voice faded. "Please don't let it be my baby."
  "I am unsure who's death it speaks of," he told me. "All I know is there will be much death and sorrow in the very near future."
  My eyes went back to my child as she slept with difficulty. I was also getting these feelings. I could hear the forest speak to me now; tell me of the death that Laehrin spoke of, almost sing to me of sorrow that loomed and would hang over me, over clan.
  Laehrin placed his hand gently on Andreya's cheek. Slowly, he bent down to kiss her forehead lovingly. He then wrapped his arms around me, holding me tightly. Tears again filled my eyes. Sadness and despair filling me more as he did so. The sounds of the woods and of my child's ailments pounded through my very being. That was all I heard. I did not feel Laehrin release his clutch on me or hear him sneak off into the woods.
  I felt his presence slowly fade away. I did not know what had happened. All I knew was that Laehrin's once very strong aura was no longer around me. All I felt was my child's soul slipping away from me. I was alone in the clearing with my dying child.
  A sudden and harsh wind picked up making me cold to the bone. The strong breeze hissed through the woods. The trees moaned with every gust. I now knew what had happened. I could hear it in the sad sullen singing of the trees. I heard his crying being carried over the wind. I got chills listening. I saw a light come towards me through the darkness of the woods. I knew it was not the moon, for the moon was well hidden by clouds. I could see a faint shape in the light. I saw his figure before me. I saw Laehrin's spirit hovering sadly above me and his child. The wind slowing as he hung over us.
  I saw him try to tell me something, his lips moving with no sound. I had difficulty understanding what it was he wanted to tell me. My eyes were swollen from the crying.
  "What is it my love? What are you trying to tell me?"
  Suddenly, the wind picked up again. I could almost hear his voice being carried over the chilling wind.
  Slowly, his spirit floated to the ground and seemed to walk towards me. He seemed to touch me. I could feel him even though his physical being was no longer next to me.
  "A parent should not watch their child die," his voice said over the harsh breeze. "I could not sit and watch my only child die before my eyes." His voice was so soft that I had to strain to listen as it started to fade. "I will be here for her," he continued, "when she also decides to let go. She is strong. She will not want to continue on in this sickly state."
  His aura was starting to fade.
  "Please," I cried, "don't go yet."
  "I must," he whispered. "But I will be back to guide her in her next journey. She will not have to do that alone."
  I did not realize that Andreya was awake and had opened her eyes until I heard her soft voice.
  "Daddy," she said in a strained voice, "is that you?"
  "Yes, my honey, it's me. It's daddy," Laehrin told her in a comforting voice. "Don't be afraid."
  "How come you look different? Why is there so much light around you? And why do you speak so softly?" she asked him.
  "I am not quite myself," he told her.
  "What do you mean daddy?"
  "I'm going off to a distant land to visit the Gods. They have called for me to join them."
  "Can I go with you daddy?"
  "Not right now honey. You must stay here and take care of your mother for me."
  "Mother doesn't need me to take care of her. She's too old."
  Laehrin chuckled. "She may seem like she doesn't need you," he told Andreya, "but she does need you. She loves you very much."
  "I know daddy," Andreya said just before getting another coughing fit. "But how can I take care of her if I'm so sick?"
  "You are strong, little one," he told her. "You can do anything you stick your mind to. You're a big girl now, remember?"
  "No daddy, I can't," she retorted in her weak state. "I want to go with you. Now."
  "Honey," Laehrin said with a sigh, "I'm not sure if it is your time. The Gods have not told me yet."
  "Can't you go find out and come back?"
  Laehrin conceded. "I will do that for you, little one," he told her while glancing at me solemnly as if telling me what the response would be. He did not want to let his little girl down. But he also did not want to see her in pain. He had come to the realization that he had no choice but to watch her die.
  His spirit dissipated and the light floated towards the sky. I looked back down to Andreya as the wind died down.
  "Will daddy take me with him mother?" Andreya asked me.
  "I don't know honey," I told her.
  "Why do you cry mama? Why are you so sad?"
  "I'm worried about you," I told her.
  "I'll be OK mama. I promise." As much as I wanted to believe those words, I couldn't. I knew what would happen when Laehrin came back.
  "I know honey, but I still worry. Mothers are supposed to do things like that."
  I looked into Andreya's eyes and knew she had made up her mind to go with her father and there was nothing I could say to her that would change her mind. She was as stubborn as her father and myself put together.
  The wind picked up again and I knew that Laehrin had come back from the other side. I knew what he was going to say. I knew he was going to come back and take her away with him. He would have no other choice.
  "Daddy's back," Andreya told me.
  "Yes, I know," I replied.
  "What did they say daddy? Is it my time? Can I come with you?"
  Laehrin looked at me solemnly, sadness filling his empty face. Slowly he looked down to his little girl.
  "Honey," he said, his voice faint.
  "Speak up daddy, I can't hear you."
  "The Gods have spoken to me honey," he said in a louder voice.
  "What did they say daddy?" Both she and I waited for his response. Her voice ringing with an almost eager anticipation.
  "They said it is your time."
  "Will you be the one to take me daddy?"
  Laehrin nodded. "Yes honey, I will."
  A meager smile came over Andreya's pale face. It would be the last time I would ever see her face glow like that.
  "Don't cry mama," Andreya said trying to comfort me as I sobbed. "I will be much better with daddy. He'll take good care of me."
  "I know honey, I just don't want to lose you," I said between sobs. I knew what she had said was true. Laehrin had always been a good father to Andreya. I knew he would not let me, or her, down again.
  "Why don't you come with us mama? We can be a family again, like we used to be."
  I was unsure what to tell her. I had considered this option before, but had never told Andreya about it.
  "Go with your father," I said reluctantly. "You heard what he said. The Gods have willed you to go."
  "But I want you to come too mama," she pleaded.
  "Go Andreya, before you get in trouble with the Gods."
  "Yes mama," Andreya said, her eyes closing for the last time. I bent down to kiss her brow for the last time.
  My little girl was no longer with me. I saw her spirit rise from her limp body and join her father's. Their hands joining in a ball of light.
  "Please mama, come with us," she said as she extended her other hand to me. I did nothing, I couldn't. I was frozen with sheer sadness.
  "Come Andreya, we must be going," Laehrin said as he started to fade. "The Gods are calling for us."
  "But what of mama?" she asked.
  "Your mother knows what she will do," he told her. "If she decides to join us, she will; if not, she won't. Only your mother knows what she will do. Now, we must go before the Gods get angry."
  "Yes daddy," she said reluctantly.
  He looked at me one last time, looking into my eyes. I begged him to take care of her, to never let her out of his sight. I knew that he would do as I asked, because he loved her as much, if not more, than I did.
  Slowly they faded from existence. The light around me dissipating as their spirits headed toward the sky. That was the last I saw of them.
  I was distraught. I fell over the body of my child sobbing uncontrollably. The wind was gone and I was all alone. Not even the gentle sounds of the forest could soothe the pain of a grieving mother. I felt I had no other option now but to take my own life. Both the love of my life and my child were dead. I was completely and utterly alone.
  I could not handle the pain of losing both my child and my soul mate. I searched for something to take my own life so that I could be with my them again. I looked at what I was holding, my weapon. I pointed the blade toward my stomach and thrust it into me quickly. Pain riddled me. I slowly pulled it out. I could feel my blood rush into my stomach. The world around me started to fade. I began to black out. I closed my eyes as I laid myself next to my child's body.
  The next thing I knew, I was looking down at the forest floor. I could see my body next to Andreya's, a pool of blood on the ground beneath my body. I turned my head away from the death and toward the sky, never to look back at the world as I once knew it. I headed toward the sky to join my child and her father. My soul could now rest with some ease. I would have all I had ever wanted in the life that I left. I would have my child and my soul mate with. I could almost see them waiting for me. I finally found my place. We would be a family once again, only now in death.
  I said farewell to the world below as I soared to new heights, never once looking back. I knew what I had left behind and what I had to look forward to in death. I knew there would be much pain for those that I left behind. But I also knew that they would understand why I did what I did. I knew that they would remember me not in death, but in life. They would remember me as a loving sister, wife and mother.
  It is now that I say farewell to those I have left behind, those I held nearest and dearest to my heart. You were there for a soul that was full of pain and sadness. But do not see my leaving as a time of mourning, but as a time of rejoicing. For now I am in a place that is full of happiness and I can no longer be sad. From here on out, I can only be filled with joy and happiness because I will no longer have the pain I once knew in my mortal body. My spiritual being is now a whole once again. For the first time in my meager existence, my tortured soul is finally at peace. I am one with the stars.
  Every time you look towards the sky remember my husband, my child and myself for this is where we will be for an eternity. We are in the woods that you walk through, in the flowers that you pick and smell, in the streams you sit beside, in the moon that lights the night sky, in the stars that shimmer so brightly when the sky seems to be a barren land. We are with those who have died in the past, and wait for those who are yet to join us. We will be here to guide those who have not yet passed. We will be here to look down upon you and watch as you lead your lives.

young, forever

she will stay young today.
her soul will be forever young.
the gods have chosen to bring
her spirit up to the heavens
on a golden ray of sunlight.
perhaps they did
so that she might bring to them
the joy and happiness
that she has given to us,
and the warmth she has put
in our hearts and minds forever.
perhaps because
she had the ability
to turn a cloudy day
into a beautifully sunny one.
or perhaps because
her brilliant smile and rosy cheeks
could cheer up an entire room
with just a glimmer and spark.
she was a solitary rose
in a field of forget-me-nots.
she's a field of poppies
blowing in the wind.
she brought happiness
to all those around her.
she brought life
to all that was within her reach.
the world was her background,
and now her background has grown
to include all of the universe.
the stars are her toys,
there for her to play with.
her trees have changed
to rays of golden sunlight
and soft, humbling moonbeams.
she now watches the world below
from the skies above...
the same skies that she so adored,
night after night,
from the world she once called home.

  Myra crept quietly up to the three graves lying side by side. Her eyes were focused on the far right one, the one who held her dearest sister, Mhairi. She stood beside it a moment, and then kneeled beside it, scattering some seeds around amongst the flowers that had been left in tribute. With a few words, Myra placed her hands over the ground, calling on her powers to cause the tulips to grow around the headstone.
  The middle grave held Andreya, and the far left was empty. Laehrin's body had never been found. Myra lowered her head, weeping. Her shoulders shook and she cried out all her pain and sadness. Mhairi had become a dear sister to her, closer than any other had ever been. Mhairi was the only one who had stood by when Myra's life and memories were not her own. Myra had heard Mhairi's last hours were spent with her daughter. Mhairi had been found impaled on her own weapon, lying next to Andreya's cold body. Myra berated herself for having not been there, hating herself for being unable to heal Andreya or keep her sister alive.
  Although Myra couldn't consider killing herself, she did wish she could join Mhairi, one last time to say good bye. She raged inside her mind, screaming at the gods and the unfairness of the world. It seemed to her the curse had returned. All whom she touched died or destroyed themselves.
  Sighing, Myra tried to pull herself out of the hurt and despair. Wiping the tears out of her eyes, she noticed a shadow was hovering over her. Myra also noticed a hand on her shoulder, and looked up to see a tall man standing over her. Narrowing her eyes she recognized some of the features.
  "Laehrin?" She whispered doubtfully.
  "Yes." He said sorrowfully, and instantly Myra knew it was him. His voice was unmistakable. "I was too late. I thought."
  Myra stood and hugged Laehrin, thinking of the irony of all that had happened. Laehrin hugged her back, perhaps thankful for the small comfort she had to give.
  The ironies of life. The mischief of living. The path of the curse. Cursed.

Myra: A final tribute to a beloved friend.
To: all Mhairi (wherever she may be)

"You Are Free"

Fly away, fly away,
Fly away now.
Take your chance
And spread your wings.

Fly into the sunset,
Keep going,
Don't stop.

Take the chance now!

Your loved ones will stay here,
While you find yourself.
We'll always be waiting,
I'll always be here.

Fly away, fly away,
Fly away now.
This is your chance,
To spread your wings and fly.
You are free, you are free!