"I think that stew's done been mutilated enough." Buck grinned at the perplexed expression on the little boy's face, yet felt disappointment when he didn't respond with his usual questions about things he hadn't understood. J.D.'s chubby cheeks were a deep pink and his eyes much too glassy for Buck's comfort. His heart told Buck that despite Nathan's diagnosis, the boy was getting worse. "Come on, son, you ready to take a nap?"

J.D. nodded solemnly and crawled out of his chair. Buck hated seeing him so subdued and cursed his own frailty. "Go on and change, I'll be right behind ya." More like an hour behind, Buck thought as he once again tried to pry himself out of his chair.

He felt like a complete and utter failure in the Daddy role right now. He should be lifting J.D. into his arms, letting that dark head rest against his shoulder as he carried the sick little guy to bed. Instead, he had J.D. putting on his own nightclothes and tucking himself in.

The need to be there for his boy pushed him forward and he gnashed his teeth as he fought to ignore the stabs of pain running along his spine. By the time he'd made his way into his room, J.D. stood waiting to greet him in the doorway. Buck couldn't help but smile at the tiny child in his oversized blue nightshirt reaching out to help steady him as he walked into the room.

"You're comin' to bed now too, ain't you, Buck? Uncle Nathan said you needed to rest." J.D. rushed to pull back the covers and Buck nodded as he lowered himself onto the bed. He knew that once he stretched out on the soft mattress, he might not be able to get up for days. Then again, there wasn't much else he could do anyway. Getting anything done was out of the question and he sure as heck couldn't sleep in a chair. Might as well rest now and worry about being able to move in the morning.

The sound of tiny bare feet smacking against the wood registered in Buck's ears. "J.D., where's your socks?"

The boy looked down at his feet as if he hadn't noticed before. "Forgot."

"Uh, huh. Uncle Nathan said you needed to stay warm, so go put some on unless you want him to bring you some more tea, boy."

J.D. hurried back toward his room and returned shortly, his woollen socks barely making it past his ankles in his apparent haste. An unexpected tug on Buck's leg made his back spasm and he gasped to keep from yelling.

"Son, what are you doing?" The words emerged through tight lips as he realized the source of his pain.

J.D. looked up at him, his small hands still securely planted on Buck's foot as he pulled again, this time succeeding in both removing the boot and making the room spin.

"Helpin' you get ready for bed." The innocence and sincerity in the young voice touched Buck's heart and he steadied himself as J.D. grabbed the other foot. He wanted to laugh as he clutched for dear life to the bedpost and J.D. slid on the smooth floor as he wrestled a boot almost as big as he was. Of course he'd have never made light of the situation in front of the boy. Not when J.D. took his appointed job as caretaker more seriously than a five-year-old ever should.

Buck managed to live through the eager tyke's insistence on helping him lie down too. Barely. By the time his legs were on the bed and his body stretched out, the sheer agony had caused Buck to almost utter a few choice words he was sure had been long forgotten. Words his mother used to threaten to wash out his mouth for even thinking.

"Come on, time for shut-eye, kiddo." He motioned for J.D. to get in, afraid any more 'help' from the boy would certainly kill him.

J.D. crawled in beside him, pulling the covers over them both before settling his head in the crook of Buck's arm. All the pain and exhaustion didn't matter anymore as J.D. snuggled against his chest. His boy. Someone he'd never known he'd wanted and someone he knew he could no longer live without.

Buck shifted his weight slightly, trying to get more comfortable without disturbing the little boy in his hold. Finally he found a position he could live with, at least for tonight. Besides, he did feel better. Kinda light-headed and suddenly so sleepy he could hardly keep his eyes open.

J.D. kicked off the blanket he'd just covered himself with and squirmed restlessly. "What's the matter, Little Bit?" Buck smoothed back the dark hair from the child's face, immediately noting the increased heat emanating from the soft skin.

"Too hot." The boy replied, confirming Buck's fears that J.D.'s fever was far from abating and, in fact was getting worse. And Buck couldn't do a damn thing about it. He wanted to get up, walk across the room and wet a cloth to smooth across the boy's brow. Hold him in his arms and hum softly into his hair and soothe away the hurt. Just as Buck's ma had done for him when he was little. And just as Sarah and Chris had done for Adam.

Instead, he was so damn sore and weak he could barely lift his head off the pillow. Well, his back wasn't really all that sore now, come to think of it. It was actually kind of numb. Hell, everything felt numb. And awfully heavy. With no real pain, you'd think a body that'd been hurting as bad as Buck's had would be more than willing to cooperate and get up. Instead, his leaden limbs were no more likely to lift off the bed than fly, the reality of which dismayed him more than he could ever imagine.

He could only think of one other time when he'd felt this hopeless and utterly useless. That time in Hell. . . after the fire. When he'd been too late to save Sarah and Adam and had nothing but strong arms, broad shoulders and weak words to offer Chris. None of which his best friend had been willing to accept.

This time was different though. With J.D., Buck's love was accepted unconditionally. As were his strong arms, broad shoulders and soothing words. And so he carefully, and with more effort than should have been required, snaked his arm out from under the covers and drew his son once again into his side. Murmuring to reassure the sleepy boy, he nestled the little head against his chest, and pulled his shivering form close. Despite the fact that moments earlier the child had discarded his blanket, in his near slumber he willingly surrendered to Buck's hold and settled against his shoulder.

The boy would be all right. He had to be. Nathan would be back tomorrow and, in the meantime, J.D. had his father's warmth and love to keep him safe. And, just before exhaustion finally claimed him, Buck prayed to heaven it would.

+++++++

"You ready for some shut-eye, Cowboy?" Chris softly asked of the already half-asleep youth he was tucking under the bedcovers. Despite the long ride and non-stop activity since they'd arrived in Eagle Bend, it had taken longer than Chris had expected for the boy to finally wear himself out enough to crawl into bed.

Vin blinked owlishly as his whispered "yeah" turned into a yawn and Chris couldn't help but chuckle at the sight.

"All right then. I'm gonna sit up for a while, so you just call out if you need anything." Tenderly tousling the soft waves under his palm, Chris rose from the featherbed intending to make his way over to the comfortable armchair under the windowsill calling to his tired bones.

"Chris?" The sweet voice stopped him and he returned his attention to Vin.

"Yes, son."

Adoring blue eyes grew serious, yet the smile never diminished. "Thank you," the boy whispered.

The sudden lump in Chris's throat nearly choked him. Only Adam had ever looked at him with such devotion. Until now. He determinedly refused to give into the grief and instead grinned back at the child - his child - all the while wondering how on earth he'd been so lucky to have been given such a gift. He really was a lucky man. Just like Buck had told him so after the two orphans had come into their lives. And Larabee was finally beginning to believe his good friend. "You're very welcome, Vin. And thank you for coming along."

The boy beamed at that. Seeing the joy carried over from his eventful day still written all over Vin's face, Chris couldn't help but ask him the question he'd asked before tucking him in for the night. "You're sure you want to leave right after breakfast? I bet there's places we didn't get to today." Truth be told, that was highly unlikely, but he didn't want the boy to miss out on any of the wonders Eagle Bend had to offer.

Not at all surprising though to Chris, Vin shook his head vehemently. "No, Chris, we gotta get back to J.D. And to Buck." The small face wore a solemn expression again and Chris's chest swelled with pride in the boy who took his responsibility to his younger cousin - to their entire patchwork family, in reality - so seriously.

Impulsively he found himself reaching for Vin again, smoothing his hand along the boy's flaxen hair. "Ok, then," he murmured, watching as the boy fell asleep under his touch. "Good night, Cowboy," he whispered and then quietly resumed his path to the inviting chair.

Settling into his seat, Chris looked out into the starry night. He couldn't deny how much he had enjoyed being a part of Vin's adventure. It had certainly brought out a side of Vin that had been too long in coming.

From the minute the boy had stepped off the boardwalk and grabbed Chris's hand, he knew bringing Vin along had been the right choice. Even if J.D. couldn't be with them this time, the trip would bring the youngster some much needed fun.

That wonderment began with the churchyard that had been graced with a nativity scene of such grandeur and realism that even Chris had to stop himself from openly gaping at the view. Yet what had mesmerized the boy most, what had literally stopped him in his tracks, had been the immense evergreen which towered like a cathedral in the center of the brightly decorated town square. Once Vin had regained his composure and his feet, he had circled the tree more times than Chris wanted to remember, having been dragged along as the child stored the memory of each and every ornament or strand of tinsel and popcorn to bring home with him.

The tree had been so exquisite that, for a moment, Chris had felt a twinge of guilt. That the modest and humble tree that he and Buck had cut down for the boys days before simply couldn't measure up to the one before him. But, as he'd recalled the laughter and joy that permeated the air the afternoon he, Buck and their boys had selected and brought home their tree, he realized he had nothing to worry about. The delight twinkling in the boys' eyes as they'd garnished it with a few precious decorations, along with paper chains and popcorn strands, lovingly made by fumbling hands big and small, changed Chris's mind. He and Buck had no reason to feel guilty. The boys had been thrilled with their tree. And the memory of their first tree together would be one that Chris would hold close to his heart forever.

But that didn't mean a few newfangled glass ornaments - made in Germany, no less - hadn't found their way into Chris's saddle bag.

New ornaments for their new family, had been his explanation to Vin. Not that the boy had needed any convincing.

After dinner and making their purchases of decorations, candy and the noise poppers Chris had been able to secretly buy for both boys, he and Vin had made their way back to their hotel room to store away their new treasures. A quick change into heavier clothes for the evening had preceded a desired return visit to the town square. The splendor of the tree had once again captivated the boy and this time visitors had been entertained by carolers gathered around its base as well.

Chris found himself wincing, then smiling fondly at the memory of Vin's more than a little flat rendition of the few carols he knew. And the off-key humming of those he didn't. It seemed Chris's adopted son and he had something else in common.

As Chris gazed out into the night, he recalled listening to that boy's vivid recounting of his adventure as he'd been tucked into bed, and his chest swelled with satisfaction. Success. Contentment.

And yet throughout the trip his thoughts had constantly strayed to those two members of his family who he'd left behind. And he couldn't deny how much he'd missed Buck and J.D.'s presence just for the short time they'd been apart. He could vividly imagine J.D. perched high on Buck's shoulders, both of them staring wide-eyed at the decorated windows and the seemingly endless sights the town had to offer. Now his thoughts turned to wondering how his best friend with a bad back and a soft heart was coping with the talkative tyke on his own.

He wasn't overly concerned about J.D. taxing Buck's patience or limitations. When it came to children, and J.D. in particular, Buck had the patience of a saint. Sure, at times both boys could bewilder him. Even exasperate and annoy. But, the full of life, overgrown kid that Wilmington was had a tolerance level that far exceeded most parents. Including himself at times, Chris had to begrudgingly admit.

Buck and J.D. would do fine together and their remarkable bond would undoubtedly strengthen even further. Yet, Chris couldn't help but feel a sense of loss. That neither Buck nor J.D. were able to share in the excitement and sheer fun of this latest adventure.

In spite of the five-year-old's usually cheerful demeanor, Chris knew that the trip to Eagle Bend would have done the child every bit as much good as it appeared to have done for his older cousin.

J.D. needed that kind of magic in his life too.

Although Chris might have originally bought into the idea that J.D. was simply a happier child than Vin and perhaps less affected by the hardships they both had suffered, he no longer held that belief. He frankly still felt a little ashamed that he hadn't been able to figure out J.D.'s 'act' on his own. After all, the boy did live under his roof. In a home they shared with an equally affable 'actor'.

Typically, Buck had understood the child almost immediately. Which was perhaps what had drawn them together in the first place. That attraction and unusual connection between those two should have been Chris's first clue that there was much more to J.D. than had initially met the eye. He knew Buck was cut from the identical cloth. In fact, the man was damn near as complicated as any woman Chris had ever run across which, come to think of it, probably explained why he got along so unbelievably well with the fairer sex. Even if he did often present himself to the world as only one step above a happy-go-lucky buffoon.

Buck Wilmington was far from being a carefree fool though. As was the boy who had become a son to him.

It had been Josiah and Ezra who'd both sent not-so-subtle hints Chris's way about J.D.'s behavior. Josiah was always there to remind Chris of just how recently J.D. had lost his mother and the only home he ever knew. And how much time he spent in an overburdened orphanage as the youngest and by far the smallest child in the care of underpaid and overworked strangers.

Ezra's comments were at times subtle and at others scathing, but would almost always give Chris insight into not only J.D., but the gambler's background and what made him tick as well. When Ezra quietly spoke of living as an outsider in a lavish home, unable to partake in the amenities of that home, Larabee would not only begin to understand more about J.D., but about his gambler friend too. And any of Standish's references to the 'hired help' and the disdain his mother and other relatives had for the 'lower classes' were always full of remorse. As though there had been a time when Ezra had treated the likes of J.D.'s mother, and by association the likes of her kin, equally as poorly. And his shame for such behavior was palpable.

But Chris knew in his heart that Ezra adored both J.D. and Vin. From the moment the gambler had stopped the orphanage's Sister Martha from punishing J.D. after he and Vin had run away from Josiah's church, he should have known that Ezra was going to become their champion as well as their friend.

Buck, on the other hand, had never openly shared his insight into J.D. with Chris. In retrospect, Larabee felt he had the why of that figured out. That Buck - being the selfless friend that he always was - had left Chris to handle the immense task of bolstering Vin's self-esteem and earning his trust, while he took on the equally arduous mission of breaking through the wall of seemingly carefree happiness that J.D. had built to protect an already shattered heart.

At times Chris wasn't sure who he was more angry with: Buck, for taking on the responsibility of J.D.'s emotional well-being on his own, while still helping as much as he could with Vin. Or himself, for being too blind to recognize that the enchanting little child, whose actions and attitude were so much like those of his guardian's, undoubtedly shared a similar history of suffering, hardship and heartache as well.

So, as he listened to the contented sleepy exhalations of Vin, the rancher could only hope that the small treasures they brought back home to the little boy left behind, would bring to him even a fraction of the true, undeniable joy that his older cousin had experienced today.

+++++++

J.D. woke up slowly. A dull ache in his belly and an overwhelming heat swimming through his whole body pulled him rudely from his dreams. His newly opened eyes began to adjust to the darkness as he searched for his older cousin. Panic squeezed in his chest until he remembered he was safe in his papa's room. J.D. sat up, one arm wrapped protectively around his hurting middle as he shook Buck's unconscious form with his free hand.

"Wake up, Buck. I don't feel good." J.D. could barely get the words out of his scratchy throat and he poked the sleeping man in the ribs with his fist. The only response he got was a low groan as Buck settled back into his pillow.

J.D. knew that with enough persistence he could probably wake him, but he remembered that Buck had needed Nathan's help to move around before. And Uncle Nathan had told him he needed to take care of Buck, said he needed to sleep if he was going to get well. J.D. figured he could at least go to the outhouse by himself. He'd been outside in the dark lots of times without grownups. Of course he usually had Vin with him, but still, he wasn't no baby. J.D. slid off the edge of the bed, doubling over as another cramp hit his stomach.

Faint moonlight reflecting off the windows lit a pathway toward the front door and he quickly stepped into the tiny boots waiting for him on the straw mat. He'd get in trouble for going outside in his sock feet, even if it wasn't all that cold.

He pushed back the heavy wooden door, slipping out and letting it latch softly behind him. Clouds drifted overhead, closing out the moon's faint light and allowing darkness to turn the boy's once familiar surroundings into a nightmarish land that reeked of imagined outlaws and monsters. Like the ones that lived in those scary stories Vin liked to tell him sometimes. A cold breeze rustled through the trees and J.D.'s heart pounded deafeningly in his ears as he raced toward the looming shadow of the outhouse. Halfway there he stopped in his tracks, the sickening stew he'd forced down began to push its way back up into his throat.

He yelped in pain as he dropped to his knees to let the vile liquid spew onto the ground. Tears stung his eyes as he desperately cried out Buck's name. His body trembled as his belly continued to spasm until he sat there dry heaving and crying in the cool night air. Breathing hurt, swallowing wasn't possible even if he'd wanted to. He tried to call for Buck again, but the hoarseness of his voice and the distance made the five-year-old only too aware that he couldn't be heard. He didn't care if he was acting like a baby, he just wanted somebody to rub his back and hold his head until the awful hurting in his stomach and his throat went away.

"Mama!"

It was all he could think of to do. She'd always been able to know when he was sick, whether he told her or not and surely she knew that he needed her now. "I'm here, Mama." He whispered as he collapsed weakly onto his side. Miserable and too tired to even cry anymore.

His bottom lip quivered as he raised his head in search of the voice, that sweet voice he'd heard call his name. His mother's voice.

"Mama." J.D. climbed weakly to his feet. The wind whipped around him, drying the dampness on his face and the sweat still clinging around the edges of his hair. He shivered violently, but he no longer cared how cold he was. The promise of his long-lost mother's warm arms and loving touch pushed aside the discomfort and the fear. She'd come for him. Just like she always said she would.

The sweet smell of her perfume and the whispers in the darkness pulled him forward. He ignored the sharp branches as they raked across his face and against the tender flesh of his palms as he followed the rustling of her long skirt. "Mama, don't leave."

J.D. wished he could see her, see anything in the growing blackness of the forest engulfing him, but he was running on faith. Her voice faded, blended with the snapping of twigs under his feet and the growing rush of water ahead. She was leading him to the stream.

He stopped. Buck and Chris warned him never to go to the water without an adult. Not ever. But she was with him.

"Mama wait!" J.D. shouted best he could, the strain on his raw throat bringing fresh tears to his eyes. "I'm scared, don't leave!"

The image of the moon shone in the reflection of the stream, its light bouncing and glowing off the movement of the swift water and he looked down at the icy liquid. His mother's voice no longer beckoned him, her scent no longer led him and J.D. realized he was alone. Fear churned in his stomach and he wiped the budding sweat from his forehead, his eyes searching the landscape for something, anything he recognized.

Only the chill and the endless darkness greeted him as reality sunk in. He was cold and sick and terrified.

And very, very lost.

Part 8

Nathan shook his head, chiding himself over the meticulous checking and re-checking of his medical bag even after he'd already hitched it to his saddle. Even though he knew he'd packed it with everything he felt he needed for his trip to the Larabee ranch. More bearberry and liniment for Buck's back, and more herbs and teas for J.D.

He hoped that Buck hadn't had a difficult night looking after the boy. Jackson still felt bad about having to run out on them yesterday, but he'd been concerned about being needed here in town as well.

The good news was that ever since the Potter girl had first shown any sign of sickness, she and J.D. seemed to be the only ones to come down with anything at all. Fortunately, with school out for Christmas, the children of Four Corners hadn't been as exposed to each other as would've been the case just a week before. For that Nathan was eternally grateful.

The bad news though - and the reason Nathan couldn't abandon his obligation to the town - was that, after having spent a rough night along with Mrs. Potter tending to her sick daughter, Nathan was now quite certain that poor Eloise did have quinsy.

Thankfully, the fever she'd developed from the infection in her throat had broken overnight. He felt confident that the worst was over for the little girl and that, with continued care, she would pull through. Thank the good Lord.

Now all he had to do was make sure his two patients out at the ranch were on the mend as well.

"You sure you haven't forgotten anything?" Josiah Sanchez mocked, breaking into a wide grin as he rode up to the hitching post, alongside his friend.

Quickly refastening the bag as though he was a child caught stealing cookies, the healer answered. "Maybe I should just forget you was invited to come along." Feigned irritation might have been his intended tone, but his flustered expression only seemed to make Sanchez grin even wider.

Josiah laughed heartily. "Now, don't go taking any offence, you told me just last night that you'd welcome my company."

Jackson couldn't help but smile as well. Josiah Sanchez was a good friend. Not just to Nathan, but to all five of the lawmen keeping watch over this town. His expression sobered. "I am obliged to you, Josiah. If'n I wasn't needed back here for Miz Potter, I'd be more 'n happy to look after the chores at the ranch."

Sanchez waved off any further attempt on Nathan's part to justify his need of assistance. "No need to explain yourself, Nathan. God knows you have folk here to get back to. You know I'm more than happy to lend Buck a helping hand and tend to the stock. Whether you're there or not." Josiah's expression grew more serious as he reached across the space separating the two men and their horses and placed a firm hand on his friend's shoulder. "Now believe me when I tell you this, my friend. You are the only soul in town laying fault for you not being able to be in two places at once."

Shrugging off the pacifying grip, Nathan smiled somewhat sheepishly. "Guess I just can't help feelin' bad that I left Buck behind with that boy yesterday."

"Nathan," Sanchez sighed. "Leaving J.D. with Buck was the best thing for him."

"Oh, yeah? 'N just which him are you referrin' to?"

"Take your pick," Sanchez answered with a wink.

Nathan had to chuckle. The preacher did have a point. Buck wouldn't do anything so stupid as to jeopardize injuring his back further when he had that boy he adored so much to look after. And, whether the child's subdued behavior was due to being under the weather or due to a past that often demanded absolute obedience, J.D. had clearly proven the day before that he could behave more manageably when called upon. Josiah was right.

"Ain't that the truth," Jackson said, feeling a whole lot better about the situation.

"You 'bout ready to ride then?"

"That I am." Nathan grinned widely and mounted his horse and the two friends leisurely rode side-by-side down the street. They'd only progressed past a few of the storefronts however, when both men were startled by the sound of Ezra Standish's distant call, the tone of which sounded fairly troubled.

Alarmed, Nathan and Josiah reined in their geldings and turned as one at the uncharacteristically harried appearance of their fellow peacekeeper and friend as he quickly strode down the boardwalk from the direction of the saloon. Coming to a stop only when he was directly beside them, Ezra spoke again. "Gentlemen, I was afraid you were leaving without me."

Josiah exchanged a confused glance with Nathan. No plans had been made for Ezra to accompany them this morning. In fact, ever since his return from a trip out to the ranch to check on Buck the day he'd fallen, Ezra had been completely consumed in a marathon poker game with a well-to-do gentleman from St. Louis.

Admittedly, their friend had been shirking his patrol duties, but with the town being so quiet, Josiah had let Ezra be. It was Christmas after all and the ex-preacher was content to keep an eye on the town while Nathan busily tended to his patients, and while Ezra got to play. Josiah knew that if push came to shove, Ezra would always be there to back him up.

"Care to explain that, Ezra?" Josiah spoke up first. "Not that you aren't welcome to come along, but we thought you were otherwise occupied with Mr. Tremaine."

"Sure 'nough," Jackson continued. "The way you two been playin' all them hands, didn't think you'd be heading out to Chris's place again 'til Christmas. 'Less 'n you wore out your cards first."

Ezra smirked at the sarcasm. He was quite accustomed to the abuse his favorite pastime wrought from his friends, and actually enjoyed the verbal sparring matches. "I assure you, gentlemen, my deck is in fine form. As are Mr. Wilmington and young J.D. I hope to presume?"

"J.D.?" It was Nathan who spoke, but Josiah was just as surprised that the seemingly preoccupied Ezra knew J.D. was down sick as well.

"Why, yes." Seeing the twin looks of confusion on his friends' faces, Ezra was compelled to clarify. "I understand from the lovely Señorita Recillos that the boy is feeling quite unwell."

Ezra hesitated and it was obvious to Nathan that Ezra had more to say but, where healing was concerned, his friend was reluctant to overstep what he perceived as his bounds. He gave Standish a reassuring nod, silent sanction to speak openly, which Ezra immediately accepted. "If I might be so frank, Mr. Jackson, with Eloise being so ill, I was quite surprised to find you had not returned with J.D. yesterday when the opportunity had presented itself. Is the boy truly all right?"

"No need to worry. I don't think J.D.'s got quinsy. Eloise ain't been anywhere near 'im."

Green eyes flashed with surprise and Ezra practically stammered his response. "On the contrary, Nathan. . . I-I'm afraid I must beg to differ. It seems where the young lady is concerned, J.D. possesses the inborn animal magnetism of his surrogate father. The girl is as attracted to him as bees are to honey. And I dare say, considerably less subtle about procuring what she wants."

Nathan had no idea how his friend knew all of this about Eloise and J.D. but he had no reason to doubt him. He could feel his heart racing and his stomach flip at the implications of Ezra's words. "Ezra, do you know if them two's been in close contact this past week?"

Ezra's tone was as serious as Nathan's. "I fear she's waylaid the boy with her considerable affections on at least one occasion in recent memory. Of that I can assure you."

"Damn!" Nathan shook his head in disgust, at what or whom he didn't know. Turning to Josiah, he could see the same concern. As the bowed head raised and their eyes met, he spoke once more. "Josiah, we gotta go."

Sanchez nodded resolutely as he gathered his reins. Turning his attention to Ezra, his face wore an apology. Waiting for Ezra was not an option.

Ezra shook his head, halting Josiah's words. "No need to explain, my friends. I'll be along as quickly as I can." He turned to Nathan, who was clearly chafing to get on his way. "Nathan, is there anything you require of me?"

The healer paused, taking in a cleansing breath and a moment to think clearly. "Yeah, Ezra. I need you to check with Miz Potter 'n see if she can find out from Eloise if there's any other kids livin' outside of town she might've played with. 'N if there are, ride out 'n make sure nobody's come ill."

"Leave everything to me, Nathan. I'll report to the ranch as soon as I have the information you need."

Jackson nodded his approval, struggling with the lump in his throat that had formed at the thought of Vin Tanner and Chris Larabee. He swallowed hard. "'N Ezra?"

"Yes, Nathan."

"See if you can telegram Eagle Bend. Get word to Chris before they head on back. I don't want Vin walkin' into that cabin 'less he's already. . ." Nathan didn't want to think the words, let alone voice them. ". . . already sick, too."

The three friends exchanged fearful glances, the ramifications of Ezra's revelation becoming more dire at every thought. Breaking his gaze first and stepping away from the small group, Ezra nodded his farewell. In turn, Josiah and Nathan whirled their mounts around and rode out of town at a ground-eating gallop.

Leaving behind in their wake only a cloud of dust and one very concerned friend watching their silhouettes disappear from sight.

+++++++

Buck could feel himself being shaken, but he couldn't seem to find his way back toward any sort of reality. Images of shake shingles, Christmas trees, and J.D. crying swirled inside his head, making him dizzy. J.D. crying. . .

Buck was sure J.D. needed him and he willed himself to break through the dense cloud of confusion to reach the boy. He remembered holding the feverish child close as J.D. had finally settled, but nothing after that. His head felt as though he'd been on a week-long bender and he was damn sure going to give Nathan an earful over that. How the hell was he supposed to look after J.D. if the medicine he took was gonna knock him out? Buck gasped as he opened his eyes to find himself staring into the concerned eyes of the object of his wrath, not the chubby-cheeked little tyke he was expecting.

It took him a moment to realize Nathan was talking so he tried to set aside his own worry and focus on his friend's words. ". . .J.D.?"

Buck shook his head, trying to clear his mind and communicate to Nathan that he wasn't exactly lucid just yet.

"Buck, where is J.D.?"

Josiah's booming voice along with his presence finally sunk in and a shiver ran down Buck's spine. He's right here, Josiah, don't you see him? He's still right beside me, where else would he be? Buck looked down, the empty spot on the bed sending his mind reeling again. How could he have not known when J.D. got up? How dare he sleep when his boy was so sick?

Buck tried to sit up, but a sharp pain ripped through his back and he cried out. He felt Nathan's strong arm behind him, easing him up, but another crash of agony and nausea made his world threaten to go black again. He almost let himself fall back onto the mattress, but the urgent need to locate J.D. fueled his determination and he let his friends help him struggle to his feet.

"He can't be far. J.D. ain't one to run off. He's in the barn or the outhouse or getting some water. . ." Buck's words came in gulps, the debilitating pain and building panic making him breathless.

Buck hobbled toward the doorway, using the wall and Nathan's death grip on his arm for leverage. "We already looked all them places, Buck."

"Well, we'll look again!" Buck cursed himself for his weakened state and his inability to walk right outside and show them that J.D. wasn't lost. Except deep down, he knew something was terribly wrong and that wherever he was, J.D. wasn't all right.

Buck stumbled through the front room, catching himself on the wooden table preventing himself from crashing to the floor.

"Buck, you need to stop before you fall on your face. We'll find J.D., you ain't gonna do nobody no good…" Nathan's voice trailed but Buck knew exactly what he meant. That a cripple would only slow them down, obstruct them from finding his son. Well, he'd be damned if he let some stiff muscles and a little pain keep him from J.D.

"You go on, I ain't planning on hinderin' either one of you, but I sure as hell aim to help." As if his own body conspired against him, Buck's back spasmed again and he gripped a chair in front of him so tight he figured it just might splinter beneath his palms. "Go the hell on, both 'a ya. I don't need no help."

Nathan let out an exasperated sigh and let go of his elbow. "Fine, suit yourself, but don't 'spect we'll be helping you back in this door when you can't walk no more."

"That suits me fine, long as one of us finds J.D." Buck knew Nathan didn't mean a word of his threat, but even if he had, Buck didn't care. J.D. was the only thing that mattered.

Nathan brushed past him and left the door open wide. Josiah followed, pausing only long enough to rest a comforting hand on Buck's shoulder before leaving him to fend for himself. Buck's eyes dropped to the rug right inside the door and he stared. Not at what he saw, but at an imagined form of small boots that weren't there. The reality of J.D. being outside, sick and alone and possibly lost stopped Buck cold. His limbs ached and shook from weakness, but worry and the desperate need to know where his boy was urged him on. Buck took in a deep breath, steeling himself to take another step forward. His own pain could wait until J.D. was safe and back inside and in his arms. Then he would rest.

+++++++

Nathan's exasperation with his worried friend hadn't lasted long. He neither had the time nor the energy to spend being upset over Buck's stubbornness. Besides, he completely understood. Everybody who'd ever seen the former gunslinger with J.D. knew how much he'd been taken by the adorable little boy that he already called his son. Nathan knew Buck's determination would never waver, but his ailing body couldn't hold up long. Still he felt guilty for even trying to stop him.

"Stay close to the cabin, Josiah and me'll scour the woods." Nathan had told him, without bothering to turn around. He'd known Buck had heard every word. "We'll find him before he knows he's lost."

Those words came to haunt him as morning gave way to late afternoon and still he and Josiah trampled through the thick underbrush and trees trying to second-guess a confused five-year-old's logic. Sounds of J.D.'s name being called from all directions should have been enough to send the boy running to them. If he was within hearing range. If he was able to respond at all.

Nathan tried to shake off the foreboding sense of dread that had settled in the pit of his stomach, but it was impossible. The probability of J.D. wandering off during a fevered nightmare haunted his every thought. As smart and tough as J.D. had proven himself to be, the idea of that sick child, scared out of his wits and missing for Lord knows how long, being alone, tore at every fiber of Nathan's heart.

And he knew Buck must be dying.

Only a few more hours of daylight remained and Nathan knew Buck would be far beyond reason if they didn't locate J.D. before then. They needed Chris. Not just to help search, but to be a source of strength for Buck like no one else could. That friendship had withstood a lot of tragedy already and Nathan prayed furiously that this would be only a close call. Nothing more. But. . . if something terrible had happened to J.D., Buck would need Chris.

"Josiah." Nathan managed to keep his voice calm, but his insides were flopping like a fish on dry land as the older man approached. "I don't know if Chris got Ezra's telegram or how close he is to home, but come nightfall neither one of us is gonna be able to handle Buck if somethin's happened to J.D."

"I've been thinking the same thing. Ezra oughta be here shortly, maybe I should go ahead and ride toward Eagle Bend and meet up with Chris. Let him know what's goin' on and pick up Vin to take 'im out to Nettie's.

Nathan suddenly realized J.D. might have attempted to go to Nettie's for help, either for himself, or more likely, for Buck. Maybe he'd tried to wake the man and got frightened when he couldn't. A long shot, but it might make sense to a feverish little boy with a sick papa. "J.D. might've tried goin' out there so check every inch between here and there."

"Will do, Nathan. I'd best be on my way."

The healer swallowed the urge to tell Josiah to hurry. He knew his friend understood the urgency in bringing Chris home. They needed his leadership and strength. And Buck needed his friend.

NEXT