THE QUICK AND THE BLED

[the tenth in The Scorpion Chronicles]

by Nat Faul <pruesdoux@charmedmail.com>

DISCLAIMER: (February 2001) This is not posted for any profit but to share creative ideas with other Charmed fans on this and other websites. The characters of Prue, Piper, and Phoebe Halliwell, Leo Wyatt, Darryl Morris, Buffy Summers, Willow Rosenburg, Rupert Giles, Tara, and Spike are property of Warner Brothers Television. Other characters were created by this author. Any similarities to real persons living or dead is purely coincidental. The lyrics to Spook Show Baby were written and recorded by Rob Zombie for his album Hellbilly Deluxe, released by Geffen Records, 1999. The following account is fiction. Its sole purpose is to entertain. Being conceived during the second season of the Charmed series, this and the other stories are not congruent with the current season.

Rated PG-13: some Lesbian allusions

The Scorpion Chronicles so far: Phoebe has fallen head over heels in love with Derek ("the Scorpion") McPhillips. He came to San Francisco to found the local branch of the American Psychic Society, which Phoebe promptly joined and became a junior officer. The Halliwell sisters perceived Derek displaying some power and investigated, but all warlock and witch tests proved negative. Being so in love, Phoebe hardly thinks about this, but Prue remains cautious.

Under the glow of a street lamp, three figures stood by the roadside. A middle-aged man was speaking to a younger man and woman.

"When we get to the city’s core, we spread out. Nelek, you move around the north. Antandra, you move westward. I’ll work around the south. Make your ‘recruitments’ in private. Hide your ‘results’ as well as possible. The longer hidden, the better; especially until the following evening, when we can gather new ‘children’ to ourselves. We will meet back here before dawn. Be sure you make a two-hour start for a safety margin."

A taxicab pulled up and they got in. The older man sat up front next to the driver, who asked, "You Agrippa?"

"Yes, sir. That I am."

"Where to?"

"Downtown San Francisco."

"Anywhere in particular?"

"Anywhere along Market Street would be fine."

He drove on and turned the cab northward.

"So, what brought you to a spooky ol’ cemetery this time of night?"

"We had arrived late ... from out of town ... on business ... and wished to pay our respects to a former business associate."

"Oh! That’s nice of you. Where you from?"

"A small town in Southern California. But we travel extensively."

"What kinda work d’you do?"

"We are ... in public relations. We work with people."

"Oh yeah? Sounds interesting."

"Yes, ... Quite. Ah ... Tell me ... are there many people out on this night of the week?"

"Oh sure! Sure! Every night of the week people are out. We don’t just wait for weekends to have a good time. Nightclubs, theaters, and restaurants are packed every night of the week."

"Excellent! We have been anxious to ... meet new friends."

"Good! Good! You come to the right place."

Agrippa continued chatting pleasantly with the driver, asking many questions about the area. The other two sat in the back quietly, taking all this in. When they reached the middle of Market Street, Agrippa directed the driver to turn down a dark empty street.

"Here? Y’sure?"

"Yes. I do not wish to step out into a crowd. We prefer to step out where it is quiet and slowly merge with the festive throng."

"All right. Here y’go."

He brought the cab to a halt one block down from the main avenue. Nelek and Antandra got out and looked around.

Looking at the meter, the driver said, "That’ll be 27.60."

"Certainly. And here is your tip."

The driver looked over to see this man leaning towards him, with his face rippled and distorted and mouth open, baring a set of fangs.

In the morning, Phoebe was preparing for school when she heard a knock at the door. On opening it, there stood Derek in his usual khakis, vest, shoulderbag, and Australian hat. They embraced and kissed.

Suddenly a vision burst into Phoebe’s head. She saw a bare room, with all windows broken and the walls pocked with bullet holes. On the floor lie a bleeding figure in khakis, a vest, and an Australian hat. At the angle of view, the hat obscured the face, but Phoebe was sure it was Derek.

"Derek! Where are you going?"

"How did you know that?"

"Where are you going?"

"Egypt -- On business. Why?"

"What are you going to do there?"

"I’m going to a few business meetings, sign a few contracts, and be right back. It’ll just be for one day."

"Do you really have to go?"

"Yes, I really have to go. Now what’s gotten into you?"

"I ... had a premonition."

"Of what?"

"Something ... not good."

"And what do you want me to do about it?"

"Don’t go!"

"Babe, I have to!"

"Can’t you send someone to represent you?"

"No way! Only I know exactly what I want and exactly what I’m willing to give up for it."

Phoebe buried her face in his chest and whimpered. Derek held her tight and rubbed her back.

"Oh come on, Sugar Cake! I’ll be careful! I’ll keep low profile. I can speak Arabic. I show respect for their beliefs and customs. I don’t go into bars or drink when in Muslim countries. I’ll stay outta trouble."

"But they shoot tourists over there."

"Just a small group of fanatics do. And I’m not going as a tourist. Instead of eating in fancy restaurants and sleeping in fancy hotels, I’ll be eating by an open fire and sleeping on the ground with my Bedouin friends. I’ll be safe. Don’t worry!"

"But my predictions usually come true."

"Usually? That means not all. Right?"

"Well, some we can avert with conscious effort."

"Good! Then I will do everything I consciously can to avert any danger to me. Okay?" He could see by her face she still wasn’t assured. "Oh come on, Lady! I don’t want to leave, knowing you’ll just be wasting away with worry!"

"Then don’t go!"

"I am going! And you’re not spending the whole time bent outta shape while I’m gone! Here. You can do me a favor by watching over my motorcycle." He handed her a set of keys.

"Your motorcycle? Oh, your motorcycle! Oh, Derek! Your motorcycle!"

"I can see you’re gonna miss me."

"Oh Derek! Of course I’ll miss you! Call me when you get there."

"I will."

"And hurry back."

"I will."

They kissed, said their good-byes and her left. Phoebe went into the livingroom and moped on the sofa, twirling the ring of keys on her finger. Her sisters came through, conversing, when they noticed her looking so forlorn.

Prue asked, "Phoebe, what’s the matter?"

"Derek’s leaving for Egypt and I had a prediction of him getting killed."

"What?!"

"Well, killed or wounded. I don’t know. I tried warning him not to go but he wouldn’t listen."

Prue didn’t quite know what to say but wanted to be of some comfort to her. "Well, ... from what we know, ... so far, ... uh ... he can get out of many narrow scrapes. As you have witnessed, he usually wears a bulletproof vest, he’s quick with a gun, ... and ... he has heightened senses. It’s not going to help you to sit there worrying."

Piper asked, "What’s that on your finger?"

"The keys to his motorcycle."

"Oh no! Oh no! Not the motorcycle! You’re not getting on that motorcycle! Prue, tell her she’s not riding that motorcycle!"

Prue laughed. "Why not? She can handle it all right."

"After what happened last time?"

"Last time, Derek’s driving got them into three accidents and Phoebe handled it much better."

Phoebe assured, "I’m not going to pop wheelies or burn rubber. I’ll just use it to get around, so I won’t need to borrow Prue’s car for awhile."

"...Which I appreciate very much. So let’s stop all this worrying and start trusting each other. You’re both wasting time by worrying. Just try trusting and get on with living."

Piper reluctantly gave up, not understanding why she’s the only one concerned. Phoebe started thinking Prue may be right and continued preparing for school. After gathering her books, putting on a leather suit and helmet, she mounted the engine and took off for the university. There, she basked in the excitement of her schoolmates. ("Wow! Phoebe! You got a Harley? Way cool!")

She got heavily into the lectures and studying to stop thinking about Derek. Most of the day was uneventful, until about mid-afternoon. While studying in the student union, she was approached by one of her teachers and two women; a blonde and a redhead.

"I knew we’d find you here," said the professor. "Here are two students from UC Sunnydale, in your field, who are anxious to meet you."

The redhead stepped forward first and shook her hand. "Hi. Willow Rosenberg."

At the touch of her hand, a vision flashed into Phoebe’s head. She saw several people with peculiarly distorted faces and teeth, whom she immediately recognized as vampires.

Then the blonde shook her hand. "How do you do? Buffy Summers."

Phoebe then received a vision of this woman charging through a group of vampires, with high kicks and fists flying, knocking them down left and right. She did her best to stifle her reactions.

"Well! What brings you to our hallowed halls?"

Buffy explained, "We’re on a student exchange program, reaching out to all other students of metaphysics in the state. This week, it’s the City-by-the-Bay and we’re told you’re the top student in this field."

"Really? I didn’t know I was that popular."

The professor bowed out. "I have to get to my next class. It was nice meeting you both and I’m glad I was of some help."

Buffy responded, "You were a big help. Thank you."

Willow added, "Yes. Thank you so much."

The teacher left and the three women sat down. Buffy came right out and asked Phoebe, "What do you know about vampire?"

She felt embarrassed. "Well ... uh ... nothing actually."

"You never covered that in any of your studies?"

"Only in passing. It’s just not my specialty."

"What is you specialty?"

"Magic, witchcraft, demonology, ghosts, ... and the like."

Buffy thought hard over something. Phoebe felt abashed that she could offer no information of any use to them.

"But I could do some research. I have access to a large volume of data."

"The internet?"

"More than that. I belong to an organization, which examines the paranormal. And we have an accumulation of all sorts of information."

She gave them each her calling card, which reads:

AMERICAN PSYCHIC SOCIETY

Phoebe Halliwell

Assistant Co-ordinator

Research and Investigations

above her office telephone number and E-mail address.

Buffy and Willow were impressed. Willow exclaimed, "Wow! I never heard of this!"

"They’re in nearly every major city in the country. I can get you a brochure on how to get a branch started in you town."

"I don’t think we have enough psychics in Sunnydale to start anything."

"They don’t have to be psychics; just anyone interested in the paranormal."

"Well, we have some of those; including Buffy and myself."

"All you need is a little group to get started and more will come to you."

"Really! I might like to look at that brochure."

Buffy impatiently wanted to get back on her subject. "Yes yes yes yes! Later! Right now what we need is the localized lowdown."

"Localized?"

"Have you heard any news, or even a slight hint of a rumor, of anyone found dead from their blood being drained?"

Phoebe thought it over and shook her head. "Not around here. Not even the slightest hint."

Buffy pondered and muttered, "So they haven’t started yet."

Phoebe found that curious but said nothing. She was starting to piece together for herself this conversation and her vision. These are vampire hunters and something is going down very soon.

Next Buffy asked, "Where are the cemeteries in San Francisco?"

"There are two cemeteries within the city of San Francisco: one at Mission Delores; another at the Presidio. But due to the shortage of space, there have been no new interments since 1900. So most of the newly departed San Franciscans are buried in Colma, which is just a mile south of the city limits."

Buffy and Willow gave her looks, wondering why she would know so much about cemeteries. Phoebe saw this and felt the need to throw up a smoke screen.

"Studying ghosts takes me to cemeteries a lot."

They nodded as if satisfied by her explanation, but Phoebe still felt uncomfortable about the whole situation and just wanted to get out of there. She began gathering her books into her backpack.

"I tell you what. I’ll go to the American Psychic Society right now and start researching."

"Oh, no need to," said Buffy. "We already know about vampires. We just wanted to talk shop."

"Really? Well, ... I’m usually there about this time anyway. So if there’s anything you need me to look up for you...."

"No. We didn’t mean to impose on you."

"No imposition. Really! It’s what I live for."

"We just came to contact others with our interests."

"Well, you have my card. Call me any time. I have voice mail, so if I’m not in, leave a message and I can pick it up from home. It was nice meeting you. I hope to see you again before you leave."

"Uh ... Sure! Of course!"

Phoebe hurried off. Buffy took out a notebook and began scribbling down information. Willow eyed Phoebe as she was walking away.

"Wow! She’s cute!"

Buffy warned, "Don’t go there, Will."

At her office at the APS, Phoebe surfed the internet, looking up as much as she could on vampires. She found so many contradictions among different sources. What they agreed on were the basics, which every horror movie fan already knows. She didn’t know how to separate facts from flights of fancy, so she took brief notes on these discrepancies to sort out later. Next, she went to the APS library and pulled out every book she could find on vampires. The results were the same.

When it started getting dark, Phoebe realized that vampires will be out soon and Buffy and Willow will be at the cemetery. She knew this from her visions. She wanted to be there too in order to help them. But first she had to consult The Book of Shadows. Also her sisters needed to be brought in on what’s going on.

But when she got home, the house was empty. Piper, of course, had to prepare the P3 for the evening. Prue left a note on the refrigerator, saying that she’d be at a staff meeting, at the 415, most of the night. Phoebe tried calling them both at work but neither was available to come to the phone. She left a message with each then set out to begin research and preparations on her own.

The Book of Shadows showed information on vampires Phoebe found nowhere else. She got into it deeply, assimilating everything into her knowledge of warlocks and demons. She wrote down spells and the formula for a potion.

Then she came across a page concerning Slayers. It tells of a people born to slay vampires. They inherit special powers and receive special knowledge and training for this task. Phoebe remembered her vision of this small blonde woman, tossing around these powerful monsters like cardboard. Then she realized what Buffy is.

"She is a force for Good! We should be out there fighting alongside her!"

With this determination, she slammed the book shut and marched downstairs. Soon a few pots of water were boiling, several bowls of herbs were mixed, vials of extract were opened, and many little jars were lined up ready for use. Then Phoebe thought of something else. She went through her sisters’ bedrooms and rifled through their jewelry, collecting everything silver.

Street lamps dotted the paved road winding through the cemetery. Buffy and Willow passed several acres of gravestones for a cluster of tombs. Shining their flashlights all around inside each, they used their expertise to seek out tell tale signs of a vampire lair. Finding nothing, they trudged up a hill. When they reached the top, they got the full scope of the cemetery.

Buffy whispered in astonishment, "Oh ... My ... God!"

"It’s like a city!" Willow bewailed. "It’ll take us days to go through the whole thing!"

Buffy sighed. "Well, ... Let’s get started then."

Phoebe carefully loaded her backpack, filled with jars of her witch’s brew, into a trunk space under the backseat of Derek’s motorcycle. She carefully drove the Harley down quiet back streets all the way to Colma. From her visions, she had when she shook Buffy’s hand, she remembered the background and calculated where they would be.

On arriving at the cemetery, she cut off the engine at a distance from the target area and quietly walked the bike to a thicket. She chained it to a tree and took out the backpack. After taking off her helmet and jumpsuit, she packed them away into the trunk and locked it up. She tied a cloth to head, on which she had pinned several pairs of silver earrings and put a pair on her ears as well. Hoisting on the backpack, she headed for the rendezvous point. Old newspapers packed between the jars kept them from rattling and bumping. That way she could move quickly without being heard.

Buffy and Willow had examined another grouping of tombs and found nothing.

Willow wondered, "How long are we going to keep this up tonight? Or do you plan on spending a whole week without food and sleep?"

"Until I can think of something better."

"We could start by getting a map of this place."

"They have one?"

"They should. It’s big enough. We’ve never combed a cemetery this huge! There must be over a thousand tombs, crypts, and mausoleums!"

"Mausoleums? Now there might be a place where one can easily hide a coffin or three. We can just check the mausoleums first, then ... wait! My spider senses!"

Swift might. Dead night.

That’s right for you.

Voodoo man, Yes, I can

Tear it all down for you.

They held up their sharpened stakes and prepared for battle. They crept forward carefully, then Buffy suddenly whipped around and rammed her stake into a vampire who had been sneaking up behind them. He immediately exploded into dust.

Hunger -- Inside you!

Hunger -- Destroys you!

She turned back around to see four more charging. She counter-attacked into the group with a stake in each hand. A flying kick downed one, then she whirled around in mid-air, knocking down another. Before touching the ground, she threw out both arms, slamming her fists into the faces of the other two. She came down, staking two at once, sending them to dust. Willow staked another. The last one got back to his feet but Buffy and Willow staked him from both sides. They stood back to back, prepared for more.

Buffy informed, "More are on the way. They’re all around us."

"We were only prepared for three!"

"It looks like they had plenty of time to make a whole new fang gang. Note to myself -- Get there before they do; not after."

"It’s not your fault! We got here as soon as you heard!"

"To your left!" A vampire came out from the shadow of a tomb.

She’s a thriller! She’s a killer! --

Spook show baby!

She’s a thriller! She’s a chiller! --

Spook show baby!

Buffy leaped into action, running him through with a stake. Barely had he disintegrated into dust when more came out into the open. Meanwhile, Willow found herself confronted by two others. Although untrained for slaying, she had no choice but to brace for combat. However, they suddenly staggered forward, wide-eyed with bodies steaming, then collapsed. Phoebe stood behind them with an empty jar.

"Thought you’d need some help."

Prue sped her car down the street and came to a screeching halt in front of Halliwell Manor. She ran to the house and burst through the front door. Piper was coming out of the kitchen, reading the note Phoebe left for them.

Prue ranted, "I get one message from her, saying it’s urgent that I get home! Then I get another one saying that she’s going it alone! What has she gotten herself into this time?"

"Vampires," said Piper, handing her the note.

"What?!"

Buffy enumerated, "You had a vision of me fighting vampires when you shook my hand."

"Right," Phoebe confirmed.

"And this is something you do often? Have visions, that is."

"Yes. I’m a witch."

Willow exulted, "Really? So am I!"

Buffy pressed on. "What did you do to those two?" She nodded to the two bodies Phoebe felled with the potion.

Phoebe explained, "I did some research and found out that vampires are demon-possessed corpses. Now demons I know. So I made this elixir which drives demons out of possessed bodies; dead or alive."

"But can the demons get back into the bodies and start all over again?"

"No way. That potion is working its way into all the body cells. No demon can get back into those bodies."

"Well, it’s still the creepy that they’re not dust. I keep expecting them to get back up any minute."

"Don’t worry. I guarantee it 100%."

Willow marveled. "Great! A new weapon! And one we can easily use!"

Buffy asked, "How much of this potion do you had with you?"

Phoebe put her backpack on the ground and took out two sizes of jars. "These tiny jars have enough for one adult-sized vampire. I have 18 of these. These slightly larger ones are for two. I have ... had 12; 11 now. But if you’re expecting a lot, we can use just half the needed amount. It can still drive out the demons and be absorbed by enough of the body to keep them out."

"Good! Because we are expecting a lot."

Willow wondered, "What are you wearing?"

"Silver," Phoebe explained. "I’ve got two pairs of silver bracelets, three silver necklaces, three crucifixes, a pair of silver earrings, and the rest of my sisters’ silver jewelry on this headband." Buffy and Willow exchanged amused looks. "Aren’t vampires repelled by silver?"

Buffy answered, "Yes, but...." Then she and Willow broke down giggling.

Phoebe protested, "All right! I realize now that it’s a bit much! I admit I’m an amateur! This is my first vampire hunt!"

Willow consoled, "All right. We’ll let you off this time. But next time the jokes won’t stop."

"I can imagine."

Prue floored it down the freeway to Colma.

"Slow down, Prue!" Piper demanded. "If we’re stopped for a speeding ticket, it’ll take us longer to get there!"

"Why does she do things like this?"

"Because she’s a Charmed One! Protecting the innocent is what we do!"

"She could have waited for us! Why does she always go off alone?"

"She didn’t know when we’d get her message and when we could get home! And this was way too urgent for her to wait! It’s not her fault!"

"I know! I’m just ... worried about her."

"So am I. But could you worry a little about us? Like worry we might crash if you keep up this speed!"

Phoebe poured a half portion of the potion into an empty jar and gave it to Willow. They each threw the fluid onto the vampires closest to them. These staggered away with their bodies smoldering and collapsed. Willow began reproportioning more potion into empty jars. Other vampires were getting close, so Phoebe wrapped the silver bracelets around her fists and began punching away at them. Several were falling away with the bracelets’ outlines burning into their faces. Meanwhile, Buffy was behind them, staking several others coming from the other direction.

One dove onto Phoebe, wrestling her to the ground. However, she was so laden with silver he suddenly rolled off of her screaming with pain. Willow quickly stepped over and poured some potion onto him. On seeing the effects of the potion, others began retreating.

Willow helped Phoebe to her feet. "Are you all right?"

"Yes. Thanks."

"Good work!" Buffy commended. "That stuff’s got them maxi-wigged! They’re backing off!"

"Now what?" Phoebe wondered.

"We keep looking for their leaders. How much of that potion do you have left?"

Phoebe counted the jars and calculated. "Using half the needed amount on each vampire, I’d say we have enough for 72 more."

"Good! It might not come to that, but it’s best to be prepared. Divide it up between you and Willow. I’ll stick with Mr Pointy." She held up her stake.

They moved onto the next grouping of tombs.

Phoebe asked, "What exactly are we looking for?"

Buffy explained, "Three newly arrived coffins."

"Oh. That could take awhile. Do you have a map of this place?"

"They have a map of this cemetery?"

"They should. It’s big enough."

Willow piped, "That’s what I said!"

Prue turned her car up the road through the cemetery to the area Phoebe had indicated in her note. She and Piper got out of the car and viewed the carnage all around.

Piper grimaced. "Ew! Ew! Dead bodies all over the place!"

"This is a cemetery; the right place for them."

"Yes, but they’re suppose to be underground, not just scattered around! Ewww! And they stink!"

Prue thought of something and ran from one body to another, looking at each one carefully. Returning to the car, she informed, "The good news is that Phoebe isn’t among them."

"What do you think happened?"

"They’re all vampires. Phoebe must have worked some magic on them. There are more ahead on the road. If we follow the trail of cadavers, we’ll find Phoebe."

"Oh! This is going to be so pleasant! So pleasant I could just puke!"

Buffy, Willow, and Phoebe each stood at a tomb, shining their flashlights between the bars of the iron gates, seeking any sign of a recent addition. Suddenly Buffy turned to the others.

"Uh-oh! Spider senses!"

Phoebe asked, "What does that mean?"

Willow explained, "That’s her power to sense that vampires are getting close. She calls it that after Spiderman."

Phoebe took off her backpack and prepared the jars of potion for action. "That’s a cool power. I wish I had something like that. Usually I don’t know if a warlock or demon is near until it’s too late. Then I’m scrambling for a last-minute defense."

Willow helped unpack the jars and line them up. "How horrible! Don’t you get visions to warn you about them?"

"Not always. It has a very peculiar way of working."

"Do you have any other powers?"

"Just the power of casting spells."

"Know of any for vampires?"

"I brought one with me."

"Really? When are you going to use it?"

"As soon as my sisters get here. It takes the three of us to use it."

"How about you and I trying it?

"I’m afraid we’re not the same kind of witches."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, ... for one thing, ... do you have your own copy of The Book of Shadows?"

"Uh ... No."

"Do you have a whitelighter?"

"What’s that?"

"Never mind. That answers my question. How long have you been a witch?"

"About ... two years."

"My sisters and I were born witches, from a long line of witches; just like Buffy was born a slayer, from a long line of slayers."

Buffy turned to her in surprize. "You know about slayers?"

"I read up on you