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The naming of cats is a difficult matter.
It isn't just one of your holiday names.
You may think at first,I'm as mad as a hatter
When I tell you a cat must have three different names.
First of all, there's the name that the family use daily
Such as Peter, Augustus, Alonzo, or James.
But all of them are sensible, every-day names.
There are fancy names. If you think they sound sweeter.
Some for the gentlemen. Some for the dames.
Such as Victor or Jonathan, George, or Bill Baily.
But all of them sensible, everday names.
But I tell you a cat needs a name that's particular.
A name that's peculiar and more dignified.
Else how can he keep up his tail perpendicular
Or spread out his whiskers or cherish his pride.
Of names of this kind I can give you a quarum.
Such as Munkustrap, Quaxo, or Coricopat.
Such as Bobalurina, or else Jellylorum.
Names that never belonged to more than one cat.
But above and beyond there's still one name left over.
And that is the name that you never would guess.
The name that no human research can discover.
But the cat himself knows and would never confess.
When you notice a cat in a round meditation,
The reason I tell you is always the same,
His mind is engaged in a rapt contemplation of the thought, of the thought, of the thought of his name.
His ineffable, effable, effanineffable, deep and inscrutiable singular name
Name, name, name, name , name, name.