You Know You're Obsessed with BTVS When...

By Angelica, Ozana, QueenC, ukbuffyfan, Sk8Queen, Kat, Vetala20, sneakerpimp, WeirdArchives, Lauren, slayerette0, ILoveAngel, Darth Maul, Pandora, astrodoria, DramaQueen, Ozana, Kerra, SarahFanatic, Karen, Angel_Rules_99, RougeSlayer, Serenity, buffylover, Sara, Mike, & the Duchess

1 * You speak only in quotes
2 * You legally change your name to Buffy, Cordelia, Xander, Willow, etc.
3 * You carry a cross and stake with you at all times
4 * You begin to believe that your one of the characters
5 * You run full background checks on anyone before inviting them into your home
6 * Every song on the radio reminds you of something BtVS related
7 * You use lines like "that makes the kind of sense that's ... not." in real life
8 * You write lists like this
9 * When you go shopping you think "Oh, Buffy would like that!" (or any other character...)
10 * You're known as the "resident Buffy advisor"
11 * You operate a buffy video rental service with your friends, and of course, the late fee charge is the taking of their first born child...
12 * You begin to see similarities between that lump in the caf casserole and Nicholas Brendon's face.
13 * You think, 'how often should I sharpen my stake to keep it in tip-top shape?'
14 * you wonder how to aviod vamps tonight.
15 * you throw a hissy fit when they're all out of season two trading cards at your fave si-fi store.
16 * your math problems always end up equaling the numbers of 'Angel' on the telephone pad
17 * Your favorite thing to say when clueless is "Okay, Could you vague that up for me?"
18 * You swear John Tesh is the devil
19 * Your hair an Buffy's hair have mimicked each other for the past three years
20 * You are in the uk and you've either seen or read the script to every episode except Earshot and Doppelgangland
21 * Whenever you go to the zoo, you eye the zookeepers and avoid the hyena house at all costs
22 * Vampires don't scare you. But, dummies, creep you out.
23 * Your lingo is a strange mix between a horny teenage boy, a school librarian, a computer whiz, a stuck up bitca, and a vampire slayer.
24 * Even the thought of trying out for the cheerleading squad gives you hives
25 * You proclaim to your teacher that the egg project in family living is big no no
26 * People avoid any conversation relating to the swim team. Why? Because you love to give your "the water is *tainted* and the swim team takes aphrodesiac drugs in the steam room" speech
27 * You believe in invisible homework
28 * You avoid all moments of true happiness... just in case
29 * You avoid bald guys with punchbowl mouth
30 * It is against all you principles to write "Have a nice summer" in anyones yearbook. In fact, if anyone else has, you forge a more indepth message as a precaution
31 * You don't believe that the elderly Dutch in the elderly Dutch chat room are actually elderly Dutch
32 * Grinding your enemies into sticky paste has become a sport
33 * You don't make your lemonade with suger because Willow likes it that way
34 * You boycott the school's foreign exchange program
35 * You infiltrate frat parties; looking for giant reptiles in the basement.
36 * Your mother gets a new boyfriend. What do you do? Whack him upside the head to see if he dies, if he doesn't; then you know.
37 * Your favorite insult is "Vapid whore!"
38 * You can't figure out why Oz is starring in Austin Powers.
39 * You are being in a skating show, and you are skating to the Buffy theme
40 * You get a special tank top made for your skating show that says "Buffy"
41 * Everyone calls you Buffy
42 * You bought a stake and take it every where
43 * You wear nothing unless it is "something Buffy would wear"
44 * When you lift weights you say you are "Training for the asscention"
45 * You see your doppleganger and she's wearing all leather
46 * You carry a wooden stake for just in case purposes, besides a good worker always comes prepared
47 * You find yourself calling your boyfriend Angel
48 * You start calling your computer the "good box"
49 * You wear large crucifixes.
50 * You are upset when your boyfriend comes out during the day
51 * Your favorite word is "Wiggy"
52 * You carry an arsenal of stakes and holy water because pepper spray is "passe"
53 * You make your best friend tint her hair red
54 * Spaghetti string tops and skin tight pants are the only thing in your wardrobe
55 * Tuesday nights are sacred
56 * You search the Yellow Pages from cover to cover looking for a club called the Bronze
57 * You start a search through England looking for Rupert Giles
58 * You sleep with men that are *considerably* older than you
59 * When you dream about what happened in the last show you watched
60 * You can't stop listening to the song "I Touch Myself" by the Divinyls.
61 * You have nightmares that Buffy is starting, and you are desperately searching for a tape to tape it on!
62 * You're seducing your wiccan girlfriend, you insist the rat cage is covered.
63 * Buffy topless with her hands on her breasts is more arousing than Elle topless with her hands on her sides.
64 * Charisma in fishnets is more arousing than Sheryl in body paint.
65 * Willow in a pink fuzzy sweater is more arousing than Rose in....whatever the hell that silver chain dress was.
66 * You're selling t-shirts with I SURVIVED THE SUNNYDALE 99 GRADUATION AND ALL I GOT WAS THIS STINKING T-SHIRT!
67 * You have an even more paranoid view of politics...and shrunken heads.
68 * All the sudden, H. P. Lovercraft seems like an accountant.
69 * You are enraged with the school librarian because they don't have a satisfactory demon section
70 * You develop an unnatural fear of frogs
71 * Twinkies and Ding Dongs are an essestial part of your diet
72 * You walk around known make-out spots on the three nights of the full moon with a traquilizer gun saying, "here Oz, it's for the best"
73 * Whenever someone goes Wiggy on you, you ask, "What's your childhood trama"
74 * The sight of linolieum turns you on.
75 * You're mad because you didn't get a rocket laucher for your 17th birthday
76 * you fall asleep in class and have a buffy related dream and wake up yelling Angel no! (
77 * When you keep thinking or dreaming that your vcr's timer is messed up and it doesn't tape the epi.
78 * Some guy with a fedora and a whip says he hates snakes, you tell him, "You have no idea."
79 * Leather Corsets make you...uneasy.
80 * When there's a Living Dead marathon, you think it's a docudrama.
81 * Willow is your new favorite tree
82 * Linoleum gets you in *the mood*
83 * You call all of your friends names of Buffy characters
84 * You call your mom Joyce
85 * You have the minumin of 3 tapes of every episode, just in case someone wants to borrow one, so you won't have to be going pshyco wondering if their vcr will ruin your tape
86 * You resort to witchcraft to get laid
87 * Every time you kill a bug, it makes you hungry and horny
88 * You show up at Joss Whendon's house claiming to be his long lost child
89 * You try the same thing (look above) and your over thirty
90 * You are got outside the W.B screaming THE VAMPIRES ARE COMING!!!I HAVE TO STOP THE VAMPIRES!!
91 * On tuesday nights you will destroy anyone in the path of your "slaying duties"
92 * You make a club or a website dedicated to BTVS
93 * You think its seemingly peculier when a guest does not just come rightin and you have to "invite" them to come on in
94 * You read "You know you're obsessed..." lists to find people with a common interest.
95 * You want to say really bad things about whoever's in charge of the WB network.
96 * Finding out "Graduation Day 2" was postponed ruined not only your day, but the whole damn week.
97 * You're as excited to see the Buffy season finale as the new Star Wars movie, and you've been obsessed with SW your whole life.
98 * You wish you had a cool-sounding name like Xander, Spike, Whistler or Joss.
99 * You read an Eliza Dushku interview and feel compelled to tell other fans about it
100 * You always say "I stand by my phrase" as a rebuttal when arguing.

101 through 200

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