Your Reflections
Since his death, I have found a way to remember Michael and to comfort my
feelings of loss. I was crying one night while walking the dogs, looked up
and saw the constellation Orion. It reminded me of Michael-3 stars across
for a belt, hands raised with microphone, legs strutting across a stage.
Now the sky is his stage. Initially, I would cry whenever I saw Orion, but
now I can't wait to walk the dogs and greet Michael. It's my way of keeping
his memory alive in me. Just wanted to share that with someone who would
understand
Liz
The greiving and mourning process is a long procedure and can not be
judged by anyone elses experiences or standards. For those who feel
that they are still under great stress and sadness over the loss of
Michael: Do not feel that you are wrong to feel this way. But it may
be a good idea to look into forms of grief management. I wish I had
more specifics, but the local libary or bookstore should have a wide
selection of books that help provide insight into the grieving process
and ways to recognize, evaluate and manage these feelings.
I think the biggest obstacle I have found in my mourning of Michael is
how I was made to feel that I should not be this upset over the loss of
a public figure and someone I did not know personally. But when one has
been a fan, for a time, an idol does claim a place in one's life and a
sense of loss is nothing to be ashamed of. We are allowed to be sad,
angry, in denial of what has happened. But it is not a matter of moving
on, but a matter of learning to live with the acceptance of this loss.
Other people have mentioned their own personal loss in relation to this
process. It has been two years since my father passed away and I still
feel voids in my life. It takes a long time, but it is something you
have to work on.
Laura
i lost my mom 11 months ago yesterday... that means the 1 year mark is
coming up... *sigh* it's been one hell of a year, but i'm gettin' there.
i spent a long time after she died ignoring my feelings NOT HEALTHY!!! and
then even longer wallowing in them STILL NOT HEALTHY!!! and now i have this
fairly healthy balance where i'm ok most of the time, and then one day, i'm
not, and then i am again... i focus on the positive, and let myself be sad
when i need to... grief does that to you... hits you when you least expect
it, but for the most part, it's in 'control' for lack of a better word.
i suggest that you all look at your grief and see if it's healthy.... it's not easy to grieve the loss of someone that society says you shouldn't grieve at all... makes it tough....but there is healthy grieving and then there's grief that isn't grief anymore, it's self abuse. there comes a point where you have to look inside yourself and see what's going on... and decide if it's healthy or if it isn't.... and if it isn't, it's your responsibility to get help for
yourself. there's nothing wrong with needing help...and there's definitely nothing wrong with seeking it.
eventually, we all have to let go... letting go is not bad... whoever,
throughout history, has implied that it was, was an idiot... letting go is
healthy, letting go is not disrespectful, it is not ignoring, it is not by
passing... it's working through it and putting it in it's proper place in
your heart... whatever it is that you're letting go... in this case, michael
:) i've let my mother go, i've let michael go.... they're at peace, we
should be too :) but that doesn't mean i will *ever* forget them... they're
always with me (especially my mom :) ) and they always will be....
love to all~
courtney
~shine like it does, into every heart~
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Email: lys@mindspring.com
