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Safe, Sane & Consensual
If you are new to the Scene, expect to hear this phrase over and over. What "safe, sane and consensual" basically means is that you take precautions to prevent accidents, you don’t do anything that is obviously dangerous, and you know your play partner and negotiate in advance what activities you are willing to engage in. It also means the defining and using of SafeWords during play.
Safe, sane and consensual means no one is ever obligated to do anything they don’t want to, even if it was something they previously agreed to. Anyone who does not live up to these standards is not safe to play with. A more in-depth definition is:
Safe
The activities participated in do not involve the risk of serious or permanent injury. An injury is an unwanted or unhealthy modification to one's person or state of mind. Tattoo's, scarification, and piercings are viewed as intentional decoration rather than permanent damage...when done properly. The players are knowledgeable about the techniques and safety concerns involved in what they are doing. Each
participant must be informed about the possible risks, both mental and physical.
Sane
The activities are intended to result in the mutual pleasure of both parties and are not intended to result in the rapacious pillage of another's body, emotions and/or mind for the sole gratification of one party at the expense of the other.
Sane play requires that the Dominant first be in complete control of himself or herself. The Dominant must then exercise the control given by the submissive at all times for the mutual benefit and pleasure of both parties. Losing sight of the very purpose that control was given to the Dominant by the submissive is exploitative and abusive.
Knowing the difference between fantasy and reality. Knowledgeable consent cannot be given if you are under the influence of drugs or alcohol.
Consensual
Each party has knowingly and voluntarily agreed to the activities engaged in and did not withdraw that consent. Honesty is a prerequisite to knowing consent. Deception and manipulation render consent unknowing and involuntary.
Respecting the limits imposed by each participant. One of the most easily recognized ways to maintain limits is through a "SafeWord" "SafeGesture"- which ensures the bottom/submissive can end the activity at any time with a single word or gesture.
some interesting stuff here.
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