No, I am no morbid enough to discuss the ebola virus in a Thanksgiving column. It was sort of tongue-in-cheek humor, and it grabs your attention.

Today's column is about what I am thankful for. I am thankful for my family (All five siblings included). Above all, I am thankful for God, and the hope and strength, and everything else that he gives me. The nation that I live in, sorry shape that it may be in, it is still mine. I am thankful for the computer that I am using right now, because it has provided me with hours of entertainment, and a medium to communicate with my friends, who I am also thankful for, and the world, which I am only slightly thankful for. Well, I guess that the world has a few jerks who are good for a laugh. (Just kidding! Well, not really...)

I am also thankful that we don't normally eat deer at Thanksgiving. There is a reason behind that. See, I worry because 350 years ago, the Pilgrims and the Indians (I feel it sissy and cruel to call the Indians "Native Americans". That just makes them sound like they'd go and be eco-friendly, and use every part of a buffalo, or something.) at deer at the first Thanksgiving. Turkey was a side dish of sorts. Well, since we began eating turkey for some reason, (This reason was probably cooked up by someone who calls Indians "Native Americans".) turkey farms sprouted up. If we ate deer, deer farms would sprout up, too. Now, I have heard that wild turkeys are scrawny, and I figure that deer could stand some fattening up. Can you imagine a fat deer tottering about on its skinny legs, carrying ten times the body weight that it was designed for? Don't imagine, click on the "See a Real Fat Deer" button below. The picture may take a little while to download.

Now you see why I'm thankful that we don't eat deer at Thanksgiving.