Where Irma Rules!
That was my Grandmother's name... Irma Rule. Any other Rule's out there? We could be Rulated. The song you are about to listen to, if you have the stamina for this utter nonsense, is Believe by Cher. I like it.
A quiet little village, til I crank up my stereo. What else is there to do here? Sit around, listen to music and believe.
Anything, YES, Anything is Possible... Yeah, cause I maka de rules. As resident Mayor and Chief Village Idi-ette. Wanna make your own rules?
Wait a sec, will ya? While I download the goodies. I hope you know how long it took me find these! Almost as long as it took me to find myself. I would tell a joke here, oh, what the heck? Let's make it a true story.
This is the script of an actual radio conversation of a US naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995
Americans : 'Please divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision'
Canadians: ' Recommend you divert YOUR course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.'
Americans: 'This is the captain of a US Navy Ship - I say again, divert YOUR course'
Canadians : 'No, I say again, you divert YOUR course.'
Americans : "THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER USS MISSOURI, THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET. THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS ACCOMPANY US. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, THAT'S ONE FIVE DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTER MEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP!!"
Canadians : 'This is a Lighthouse - your call!'
Ok, now keep in mind the significance of this little story while you are shining.
Ahhh, here we go...
Rule #1: RISE!
Rule #2: SHINE!
Rule #3: You will find at the bottom of the page.
Oh, come on, you don't expect me to work any miracles here, anyway. These are really just subliminal suggestions
Let's see if we can switch it from blue
If anything here makes you feel like smilin'
or tappin' your toes
then you know you got it
You Got the Shine!
All you need, darling, is something to jump start you.
I hope you've had your coffee.
I think NOT. Here's the tingle?
A Kiss for Good Luck
And now for some contemplation!
Better than most...
You simply don't know it til you shine!
And as my Mother used to say
way back when....
If you can't shine, Rise Anyway! I hated it when she said that.
We can do better than that, gals!
I put a spell on you - Shine!
You're not the average, run-of-the-mill chic!
Find Your Own Beauty and Shine!
I'm Shining, now! Whoa! I'm outta control! I'm Fractally Perfect!
Get with it. Shine, Baby, Shine!
And watch them move out of your way.
Hey, what's that chip on your shoulder?
The past? Hmmm, it's not going anywhere.
Ya know, we're all just worms with wings. So if you ain't flyin', babe, U B just a worm. Irm101 The manager opens his dictionary and sees the following definition for panda:
"A tree dwelling marsupial of Asian origin, characterized by distinct black and white coloring. Eats shoots and leaves."
Get ready to MOVE!
Shake those buns, baby!
Who says you can't find a dance partner? Oops, Perhaps you have an enhanced image of yourself!
"Yes, your dog is dead," says the doctor.
"How much do I owe you?" the lady asks.
"$345," says the doctor.
"$345!!?" the lady asks.
"Yes. $45 for the office visit and $300 for the cat scan."
You can be, you will be, you are magical.
As high as you may fly!
Upon your golden wings and silver sky!
Oh, and rule #3: Love Me, Love My Dog!
The stickers here provided by: She also has GREAT postcards to send to your friends and family.
Get your own village!
but we really would not have time for the punch ...
So these are the rules.
Think of them as guilt in reverse.
How's your mood?
to glowing hot pink
Ready, Babe?
How's that life of yours really going?
Don't let 'em kick you around, Babe!
Do you lack direction?
Still Don't Know What You WANNA BE?
Who does?
Forget the Stereotypes!
Shake those gossimer wings!
A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. He eats the sandwich, pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter dead. As the panda stands up to go, the manager shouts, "Hey! Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I'm a PANDA! Look it up!"
Whatcha Doin' On Your Butt?
Maybe you've been too picky
...or afraid to ask
OR JUST PLAIN DULL!
Like these buns better?
No, that ain't Cher's butt, BUT it could be yours
if you shake it! Surgery is NOT an option!
Do You Believe in Angels and Fairies?
Do you suppose they believe in you?
They should. I sure do.
A woman took her dog to the vet "Doctor," she said, "I think my dog is dead". The doctor laid the dog on the table and reached down and took a cat out of a box. The cat walked all over the dog and the dog didn't move.
Do You Believe in Magic?
Do you Believe You Can Fly, Now?
Then Soar!
p.s. Fay! Yes, my Gus puppy, my buddy-bud, my punky dog, my funny face, my heart of hearts, the only one I have decreed these words to "YOU SAVED MY LIFE! -- His NAME is GUS!
ArtGekko's Very Fun Site
One talented individual!
