Disclaimer:  I do not own these characters.

Summary:  After the tragic death of her fiancé, Rory changed the path that she was following only to meet an old friend who might just be the one to ignite past dreams and feelings. Future literati.

The door opened and Rory gasped. Jess didn’t have a shirt on.  Just low-slung pajama pants.  Oh boy. 

“Hi.” Rory said.  She looked him up and down and felt slightly embarrassed for doing so. 

“Hi.” Jess replied.  He was actually shocked that she had come.  But did this mean she would allow him to take her back?

Rory continued to stand in the hallway with her bags at her feet.  Jess watched her closely for a clue as to why she had changed her mind.  He noticed that the ring that had been on her finger earlier that morning had now vanished. 

“Can I…?” She motioned with her hand to the hotel room and he opened the door more widely and stood to the side.  He didn’t offer to help with her belongings though.  He was still hurt.  Angry.  Confused.

“What are you doing here?” He asked as she placed her things on the couch and he shut the door.  He knew that either she was saying goodbye for good, or that she was going back to Stars Hollow with him. 

“I’m going back with you.” She told him, still staring at his bare chest.  He had begun to wish he had a shirt on.  And he didn’t quite believe it.

“Are you sure?”

She hesitated for a moment and he scolded himself for causing her doubts.  Lorelai would kill him if she knew what he did.  Please be sure.  Please be sure.

“I’m sure.  Are you sure I can go with you?”  Jess sighed with relief, but realized that she didn’t seem too sure.  Just as long as he could get her there.  Without falling in love with her again. Seeing her was making him think it wouldn’t be as easy as he had thought.  He was still mad, but she just…brought back so many feelings. 

“Oh, yeah, of course, I was just a little surprised.  I would have thought you’d call.” He admitted.

“Sorry about that, I just thought that if I called, I might chicken out, not be able to go through with it.  This way it was very spur of the moment.  I hope I’m not an inconvenience.”

“You’re not.”

“Oh ok.”

“Did you get time off of work? I’m sure that it would be an inconvenience for them if you didn’t just show up tomorrow.”

“Yeah, I called a fellow professor and she knows what’s going on.”

“Ok.”  This awkward conversation was excruciating. 

Rory nodded. She couldn’t take much more of this.  He was so obviously bothered by something, and she needed to mend this.  If she were going to go home, she needed an ally, not an enemy.  The whole town was probably down on her. 

“Ok then, you can sleep in there.”  He pointed to a bedroom just a few feet away.  For a fleeting second, Rory thought that meant she would spend the night in his room, but she soon realized that he was a famous author, with plenty of money, and he had a hotel room with more than one bedroom.  She stood up and walked to the room and he followed.  She flopped herself on the bed and laid on her back for a moment. 

“The train leaves tomorrow at 8, so we’ll be leaving at 6.  We’ll get back to New York in approximately 4 days.  I didn’t think that you would want to take a plane.”

“So you thought I was going to come?”

“Well, I had counted on it.  Until around 10:30 tonight, then I started to doubt myself.  But nevertheless, I have your ticket.”

“Thanks, Jess.”  He just nodded and was about to walk out the door when Rory stopped him.  “Wait!”  He turned back around, confused.

“Yeah?”

“I want to talk to you.”  She patted the space next to her on the bed.  He began to worry.  He didn’t want to talk to her.  Talking would not help.  Only harm.

“It’s getting really late, I should just go to bed…” He trailed off.

“No.” He looked shocked at her straightforwardness.  “We’re talking.” He obligingly walked towards her, but instead of sitting on the bed next to her, he sat on the couch, across the room from her.  But she wouldn’t give up that easily and she moved to sit next to him on the couch.  The close proximity got his heart beating, and he was sure she could notice.  Not to mention, he still had no shirt on. 

“What do you want to talk about?” He asked hoping to get this done and over with.

She paused for a second.  “Why are you so mad at me?”  He groaned.  This was the one question he hadn’t wanted to answer.

“I’m not mad.”  He said defensively.  But she didn’t buy his bullshit.  She fixed him with her withering stare and he remembered back to their days as friendly high-schoolers.  “Ahh, so you’re going to get me to talk with that famous Gilmore ‘withering stare’?” He asked light heartedly.  Wow, he thought, What happened to being mad?  That wasn’t the tone of a guy with a broken heart…

“If it works.”  She joked, also wondering where the gaiety had suddenly come from.  Like a time warp, back to her past.  Her past relationship with Jess.

“I don’t think you want to know why.”  Back to the seriousness.

“Jess, if I’m going to go back, I want my friend back.  Are you mad about my leaving or about Jack?” He cringed at the name.  God damn Jack.  May he rest in peace.

“Both…but more about…” He trailed off.

“Which?” She encouraged him.

“Jack.” He whispered, for the first time expressing his feelings on the matter.

“But I thought that you eventually forgave him?  I thought you had realized that I didn’t do anything wrong?”

“I guess I was just lying then, huh?” Back to angry.

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“Hello?” Jess said into the phone.

“Jess!” Rory shouted into the phone and he immediately brightened.

“Rory!  It’s so good to hear from you.  What time are you coming home?”

“I’m in the car right now.  I’ll be there in 2 hours.  There’s lots of traffic in the city.”  Only 2 hours, that’s so close, he thought.  “I can’t wait to see you.” She added.

“Ditto.” He replied.  It had only been a month, but way too long.  For the past year, both had been single, and while the two of them remained friends, more than a little flirting was exchanged.  Tonight he was going to make his move.  He had it all planned out.  Candles.  Flowers.  Dinner.  The bridge.  And then he would tell her how he felt.

“I have a surprise for you.” She said.

“Great.”  I have one for you too, he thought.

“Well, I’ll see you soon.  Bye Jess.”

“Bye Rory.”  He hung up the phone and got to work.  He decided that tonight would be the first night of the rest of his life.  And he was almost completely sure that she would feel the same way.  Especially after all those ‘almost moments’ they had shared recently.

********

Luke eyed Rory’s car pull up and he shouted for Jess.  “Rory’s here.  Get down here.”  Jess immediately dropped his book and clamored down the stairs.  He walked into the dinner to find a nightmare.

“Jess!” She ran up to him and enveloped him in a hug.  But he stood motionless and refrained from wrapping his arms around her body.  He eyes remained on the door. 

Rory let go of him and walked back to the door.  She grabbed the man’s hand.  “Jess, I’d like you to meet my boyfriend, Jack.”  Jess wanted to die.

“Jess, how have you been?  It’s been too long man.”  Jack went to slap Jess on the shoulder, the way some men show emotions, but Jess backed up.  Rory looked confused.

“You two know each other?” She looked back and forth between them.

“Yeah, Jess and I used to be buddies back in freshman and sophmore years of high school.”  Jack said and Jess wanted to roll his eyes-he wouldn’t exactly call them buddies-but he was afraid that if he did so, tears would fall.  How could she?

“Oh, what a small world.”  Rory smiled, feeling completely innocent, not knowing how she had just brutally murdered the poor heart of one of her best friends, Jess.  She placed an arm around Jack and Jess seriously thought he was about to throw up.  He needed to get out of there before he killed Jack. 

“I have to go.” Jess choked out, and Rory looked at him, perplexed.

“How come?  I just got here.  I thought we were going to hang out?” Rory asked, genuinely hurt that Jess was blowing her off.

“Maybe later.”  Jess replied curtly and grabbed his coat before walking out the door.

“What was that about?” Rory asked, not really addressing anyone, but Jack seemed to think it was addressed to him.

“I think I know.”  He said and Rory urged him to continue.  “We weren’t exactly buddies.  I was actually the guy who caught him stealing and I reported him.  After that, his life began to fall apart.  He had to leave for Stars Hollow and pretty soon I moved to Boston.  I never really heard anything about him after that.  But I bet he still hates me.”  Rory groaned.  This was not what she needed.  Her friend hating the boyfriend she was starting to really love. 

“Let me go talk to him.”  Rory made sure Jack was seated and had coffee before she left to go find Jess.  She suspected he would be at the bridge.  And she was right.  There he was, sitting with his legs dangling off the side.  And there was a small picnic set up too.  But that wasn’t for her, was it?  After all, there were candles and flowers.  Seemed too romantic. 

“Jess?”  He looked up, and he wasn’t smiling, like he usually was when she would come to find him here.  “I didn’t know you knew him.  He told me about what happened and I also didn’t know he did that to you.  I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be.  I just…Do me a favor and keep him away from me.  I can’t deal with him.” You and him, Jess bitterly thought.

“But, it’ll be hard.  When will I get to hang out with you?”  Would she have to choose between Jess, her friend, and Jack, her boyfriend?  That was hardly fair.

“I guess you’ll just have to deal.”  He couldn’t help but be bitter.   It just figured that he could never get what he wanted.  But Rory didn’t like people being mad at her, so she continued to try to talk to him.

“Whose is this?”  She pointed to the picnic and Jess just shrugged.

“Must just be some happy couple’s who decided to take their show somewhere private while neglecting to finish their food.”   Jess lied.  The couple wasn’t happy.  The couple wasn’t a couple after all.  The girl was with another man and the boy was hurt and alone.

“Oh, how sweet.” Rory smiled.  “I wanted to spend some time with you.” She was giving him one last chance to make his move.  She would choose him if he tried. 

“Don’t worry about it.  Go back to Jack.”  Go back to the one man I hate more than anyone.  It was the hardest thing Jess had ever had to do.  Let the girl he loved go.

Rory paused for a moment but then got up and brushed off her pants.  Her eyes lingered on Jess and then she closed them, as if she needed to think about what she was about to do.  But it was done.  She was leaving.  He hadn’t taken the opportunity.  He didn’t love her as she had suspected.  She left and things would never be the same.

Rory walked down the bridge and back to Luke’s thinking about this monumental decision that she made.  She decided that it was time to move on from Jess.  For the past year, she had hinted, and he had even hinted back, but he hadn’t made a move.  She wasn’t going to wait forever for him.  Jack adored her and she was sure that her life with Jack would be spectacular.  His job was extremely promising and he would never hurt her.  It was just a matter of waiting.  And she was done with it.  She opened the door to the diner and realized that this was the path she was choosing, no going back now.  It was another open door.  She pushed her feelings for Jess aside and devoted herself fully to Jack.  She would eventually become his fiancé.  And then she would lose him. 

Was it fate?

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“God Jess, what do you want me to say? I’m sorry?  I still don’t even know exactly what you’re mad about.  When did it start?  What did I do?”  Her voice was rising as she continued the argument.

“You fucking brought Jack home.”  She cringed when he said that word.  She didn’t like him to use it.  And he knew that.

“Oh my God, I brought home a boyfriend.  Why the hell did you care? It’s not like I was cheating on you!”

“No, but…” His rough voice softened.

“What?” Hers was still harsh.

“I hadn’t expected you to bring someone home.  I was going to…I wanted to…The, uh, picnic was for you.”  He mumbled, now embarrassed beyond belief.  Forget the lack of shirt, this was mortifying.  After all these years.

“Ohhhh…” A look of realization came upon her face.  On that night, was he planning to make a move?  Did I walk out on him just as he was about to confess something?  Had I ruined it when I brought Jack home?  I screwed up what he had planned.  Fuck.  I mean, damn.  “Were you, uh, going to, uh,” She took a deep breath and tried again.  She was shaking now.  “I didn’t know.”

And then Rory leaned into Jess.  She placed a hand on his bare shoulder and looked deeply into his eyes.  His hurt eyes.  That’s what it been.  He hadn’t just lost a friend, he had lost a loved one.  She was the one he had lost.  She had lost Jack only once.  But Jess had lost Rory twice.  It was all so clear. 

Rory closed the gap between them as she inched closer and closer to him.  He had closed his eyes expectantly and she now closed hers.  His breath lingered on her neck and she shivered.  What am I doing? But she still continued closer.