Chapter Sixteen: Luke

Luke felt Lorelai’s eyes on him as he made more coffee and he turned around.

“What?”

Lorelai jumped at his question, spilling coffee on herself.

“Gah, nothing.”

Lorelai grabbed a few napkins and soaked the spilled coffee with them absently.

Lorelai’s having that weird moment again…

The one where she just stares off into nothingness then suddenly starts glaring.

At me.

“Lorelai?”

“What?”

“Stop looking at me like Mark Whalberg in Fear.”

“What?”

Then Mr. Yeah I Have A Girlfriend Just Eat Me floated down the stairs and burst into the Diner.

Jeez.  You can practically FEEL the sparkly sparkles descend…

“Jess.”

“What?” he asked.

“When are you getting my truck back?”

“Oh, yeah.  I can go get it now.”

“When will you be back?”

“When I find the Hartford City Pound For Luke’s Truck.”

Crap.  He doesn’t know his way through Hartford.  Damn New Yorker kid.

“I’ll take you.”

They both whipped their heads to face Lorelai.

Jess cocked an eyebrow.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah.”

An awkward silence joined their little party.

They looked at one another, wondering what to say next.

Christ.  Teller and Charlie Chaplin had more laughs than this…

Suddenly, Lorelai lurched forward, surprising the two men.

“Luke needs to come!”

What?

“I do not.”

“Registration forms and all that ownership jazz?”

“Crap.  Do I really have to go?”

“Yes.”

Dammit.  A car ride with Jess and Lorelai in her teeny tiny little Jeep.

“Oh, while we’re there, we might as well pick up Rory from her group meeting.”

They both saw Jess’ face shift subtly.

Come ON.  How happy can this guy GET?

Killing two birds with one stone. 

Killing four people with one vehicle. 

Running Jess over with my truck as soon as I get it.

Wonderful.

“We won’t fit your little car.”

“I’ll be the judge of that.”

Oh, my God.  I feel like I’m in a freaking clown car.

Luke shifted in his seat and hit Rory with his elbow.

“Sorry.”

“That’s fine.”

He looked at the backseat where Jess and Rory were squished like a pack of sardines in a two-inch can.  Jess had his arm around Rory and her legs were flopped onto his lap.

They hit a speed bump and they both bounced.

Rory laughed softly as the two of them seemed to remember something in particular.  She hugged him closer to her and kissed him.

Gross.

Luke flicked his head back to the road and crossed his arms in front of him. 

Well, not really.  It’s not like Dave England and those eggs…

His eyes shifted to Lorelai, who was humming along to a Fugazi song.

It’s like an, ‘Ew, why do they choose to flaunt it like that in the premises of a clown-car-esque situation?’ kind of gross.

He didn’t want to admit it, but Luke couldn’t help himself.

So what if I’m jealous?  I’ll live.

Maybe.

Or maybe I’ll die lonely and grumpy.

…

How do you hum to Fugazi, for Pete’s sake?

“Are we there yet?”

“Stop whining, will you?”

“I feel like I’m going to be permanently frozen in this position in a few seconds…”

The Jeep abruptly stopped, making Luke shove forward and almost hit his head against the dashboard.

Ahhh!!!

“Lorelai!”

“Sorry.  Old lady.”

“Ugh, finally.”

They got to the pound a while later, much to Luke’s relief.  He didn’t want to be in that car any longer, with all the loooove hearts oozing out of the two teenagers. 

Ew.

My truck!

There, sitting in all its rusting glory, was Luke’s truck, just waiting to be picked up.

Luke jumped out of the Jeep and went to talk to the car-people.

After the nice chat he had with Lorenzo, Luke was fuming.  He stalked over to where Jess was standing and used all his other energies to restrain himself from strangling the boy.

“Jess!  Why would you park in front of a fire hydrant?!  Why?”

“I didn’t see it.”

“How can you not see a fire hydrant?!  It’s red.  It’s metal.  It’s fat.  It’s just sitting there, supposed to be seen…”

Luke sighed and smooshed his face with his tired hands.

I need some tea.

Any amount of money for something to calm me down.

Robitussin would be great.

“Look, I’m sorry, alright?  I’m not going to do it again.”

“You’d better not.”

“I don’t think I’ll ever come near Hartford again.”

“If you’re going to get cars towed, might as well be yours.  Buy your own car.  Stay the hell away from mine.”

“I’ll do that right after I win the world-wide lottery.  I could buy a car in peso and dineros.”

Lorelai stole a sideways glance at Luke’s tired figure and sighed.

“Luke, do you want me to drive?”

“What?  Why would I want you to drive?”

“You look tired.  Weary.”

“I am not ‘weary’.”

“You sure?  Because that ‘I am exhausted’ stamp on your head seems to say otherwise.”

“Lorelai…”

Jess coughed, “Maybe I could dr-…”

Luke shoved the keys towards Lorelai and glared at Jess.

“Here.”

Lorelai dug out the car keys from her purse.

“Great.  Rory, you want to drive the Jeep back?”

“Sure.”

Jess cleared his throat once again, “Can I…”

“No.”

“Fine.  Oppress the unknowing child.”

Luke rolled his eyes, “Please.”

That night, Lorelai came into the Diner, yawning.

“We’re all out of beds, lady.”

“Hilarious.”

Luke grinned, “Why are you here so late?”

“No reason.  Just… wanted to come.”

“Oh.”

Did she come to…

Naaah.

I wish she had though…

What?  LUCAS DANES, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU THINKING TO YOURSELF??!

“C-offee?”

Lorelai looked at him funny.

“Y-es p-lease.”

She watched him pour her a mug.  Lorelai looked up to see Luke staring outside with a soft smile on his face.

When she turned, she copied his smile.

“They’re cute together.”

Across the street were Jess and Rory, talking.  To both their surprise, Jess laughed at something Rory had said.

“Cute’s an ugly word.”

“Excuse me?” Lorelai asked as she glanced at Luke.

“It’s disgusting.  You use ‘cute’ when you see pink… things…”

What the hell am I saying now?

“Pink.  Things.”

“Never mind.”

“You know, Jess told me the weirdest thing today.”

Luke raised an eyebrow.

“What did that punk say now?”

“To paraphrase, ‘Hey, Lorelai.  Guess who’s having sex dreams about you.’”

He did not.

Jess wouldn’t…

Luke’s eye started to twitch. 

“Huh.  That is very weird.”

Lorelai’s eyes danced.

“Indeed.”

“I wonder who it is…”

She smiled, “Yeah.  Me too.”

They both turned back to the two kids outside with Lorelai grinning, and Luke looking very ill.

They both saw Jess gently take Rory’s hands in his and give her a kiss.

Luke wrinkled his nose at them and tilted his head to one side.

“Well, I guess they are a bit, erm, cute…”