Chapter 1 : Trapped Like Mice
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THE FRESHNESS OF BEING

By Oregano

 

 

          “That’s not going to work.”

          “Who’s asking you?”

          “Taylor, only stupid people will not know that, that will not work,” Luke grabbed a box of cereal from the shelves.  He followed Taylor around his market as they discussed the future of the damned Ice Cream Shop.

          “I have every right to decide where what goes in my own establishment!”

          “I have every right to kick your ass around the floor, ‘cause I’m your landlord.”

          Luke inwardly smiled as Taylor outwardly seethed.  Taylor marched around the shelves and corrected different angular misplacements.  It was blatantly apparent that this Luke-is-Taylor’s-landlord thing annoyed Taylor to his very being.

          “Fine,” he said tersely, “the extra ‘P’ and the ‘E’ are going.”

          Luke adjusted his cap and took two bottles of honey.

          “That stupid picture of the unicorn has to go, too.”

          The vessel in Taylor’s forehead pulsed. 

          He kept walking.

          Luke kept following him.

          “No, Luke.”

          Taylor opened the stockroom and carefully inspected the expiry dates of his products.  Luke raised an eyebrow and entered.  Taylor was so weird.  Shaking his head to get back to the present topic, he said,  “It looks dumb.  Not that the whole décor of the place is any better than the Queen’s, but…”

          “Well, if it’s as horrible as you describe, why in the world would a picture of a stupid unicorn matter?!”

          “See?  Even you’re calling it stupid.”

          “It is not stupid!”

          “You just said it was!”

          “Well, I withdraw my comment.”

          “How the hell do you ‘withdraw a comment’?!  You’ve said it out loud, you wanker!  You can’t take it back!”

          “Turning British now, are we?”

          “Eew, Taylor, are you flirting with me?”

          Taylor went rigid.

          “I am not!”

          “Well, that’s the kind of funny stuff Lorelai says.”

          “What?  Can a man not be funny?  What’s so special about Lorelai that only she gets to be funny?!”

          “Get the unicorn out, Taylor.”

          “I will do no such thing!”

          Luke was about to grab him by the collar and trap his little head in a solid headlock when a small creak sounded.

          Both of them turned as the door to the stockroom slammed shut.

          Luke dropped his basket to the floor and suspiciously walked over to the door.  With an angry glance at Taylor, he tried the knob.

          It didn’t budge.

          Taylor’s eyes went wide.  He ran to the door, shoved Luke out of the way and jiggled the handle furiously.  After a moment, he stopped, gasping for air.  He took a deep breath, and the place was quiet.

          “HEEEEEEEELP!”

          Luke grimaced at Taylor’s ugly wail. 

          “Will you shut up!”

          The realization of being stuck in a storage room with Taylor suddenly dawned on Luke.  It took a long time, but he.  Was.  Stuck.  In a storage room.  With Taylor.  Taylor Dosey. 

          “AAAAAAHHH!  GET ME OUT OF HERE BEFORE I COMMIT SUICIDE!”

“We’re stuck in here!  Good God!  I’ll be known as the man who died in his storage room,” Taylor glanced at Luke, “with the town crank!”

          “I’m not a crank, you butt.”

          “Oh, keep quiet.”

          “You shut up.”

 

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