Chapter 3

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Chapter 3

    ‘Ok’ Rory thought ‘I’m ready’ and she pushed the door of Luke’s open and walked in. Jess was behind the counter, and as soon as he saw her he got the look on his face again, and went back to waiting tables. She walked determinedly toward him “Jess?” she said timidly, no response, he just kept delivering food, not looking at her. “Jess, I think we need to talk” she continued “What about?” he asked shortly, the tone in his voice stung her face, but she kept following him, determined to do this “I think you know” she said. “Enlighten me” his voice was so monotone now that it was getting more and more difficult for Rory to keep going, but she did. “About what happened…last summer…at Sookie’s wedding” she was speaking very quietly now. Finally a reaction. “What about it?” Jess asked, whipping around to finally face her, the look in his eyes hurt worse then his words, Rory was losing her confidence. “Jess, why are you acting so cold? What is going on? Talk to me” she said timidly “What is there to talk about? There is nothing wrong” he said, and went back to delivering food to customers. “Jess, just give me 5 minutes” she said, getting desperate, she thought if she could just get him to talk to her then he would admit how he felt. He looked at her, “5 minutes” he said. They sat down at the counter and Rory looked at him “Jess, I wanted you to know that I broke up with Dean yesterday” she said. She searched his eyes for a reaction, for a split second she thought she saw something like hope…or maybe it was longing? She didn’t have time to find out because except for that moment, his eyes remained stone cold. She decided to continue. “I...I want you to know that, well, I mean, what happened last summer really meant something to me, more then anything with Dean, and, and I think, I mean if you want to, I want to explore those feelings further” She stammered out, and looked at her hands, they were twisting again. “You have always been the one to be there for me, and I think I have always felt like this, but I just never let myself admit it.” She said. God how Jess’ heart was crumbling inside, all he wanted to do was tell her how much he loved her, how long he had cared, but he suppressed it, he wouldn’t let it happen again, he sat motionless for a few seconds and then, once his composure was regained, he spoke, and every word cut him like a knife, but his head was telling him he had to do it, he HAD to protect himself. “That’s…flattering Rory” God this was so hard, but he continued, his mind forcing the awful words out of his mouth “But I’m sorry if I ever gave you the impression that I wanted to be with you. What happened meant nothing to me, it was all a mistake, I like you Rory, but not like that. I-“ he stopped, he couldn’t keep going, it hurt to much to continue and his voice was wavering dangerously. He knew he loved her, God he loved her so much, but he wouldn’t risk getting his heart broken again, subjecting himself to more pain, just to have her run away again. He wouldn’t let it happen again, because he knew he wouldn’t survive losing her again. It was better this way.

    Rory sat there in complete and utter shock; she couldn’t believe what she had just heard him say, it wasn’t possible. The look she now saw on his face, and in his eyes contradicted every word he had just said. She tried to say something but couldn’t make the words come out without completely breaking down, so she just got up and left.

    Jess couldn’t believe what he had just done, what he had said, he knew he had hurt her so deeply, he could actually see her heart shattering as he spoke. He never wanted to hurt her. Still as he watched he walk out of the diner it was all he could do to keep himself from jumping off of his stool to stop her and tell her it was all a lie, a façade to protect himself from pain and heartbreak. His head, however, made him stay. He promised himself that he wouldn’t again fall for her just to have her let him hit the floor as she ran away.

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