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Going jumping
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Kinky! You're a twisted one, I'll grant you that.
You like to have fun in bed, and toys, boys,
girls, you're gonna have it.
Are you a sex fiend?
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1. No sleeping over -- unless it is very good and we need to repeat it in the morning.
2. No meeting in public except for dinner or drinks before the events of the evening.
3. No calls before 9pm -- we don't have anything to talk about.
4. None of that "lovemaking" crap -- only sex allowed.
7. All gifts accepted -- including money.
8. No baby talk -- however, dirty talk is encouraged.
9. No asking for comparisons with former lovers -- it's really none of your damn business.
10. No calling each other "friends with privileges," we are not friends, just bed buddies.
11. Calling out the wrong name during sex is okay -- don't be offended.
12. No extra clothing -- I don't want you leaving anything behind when you leave.
13. No falling asleep right after sex -- it's over, so get up, get dressed and go home.
14. Don't be offended if I don't ask if you enjoyed it -- I don't care.
15. You cannot borrow my car for any reason.
16. If anyone asks who you are, the standard response will be: "My roommate's girlfriend/boyfriend."
17. Doggie style is the preferred position -- the less eye contact, the better.
19. Bring your own drink -- I am not a liquor store.
20. No phone use, please -- I don't want anyone calling back looking for you.
22. Don't bring any of your friends with you, unless they're gonna join the party.
