The film "Rainman" was shown on Television at 9.30pm on the evening of Saturday 31st January 1998. It was the first time I had seen it since the end of February 1990. The next time I saw it was on the night of Sunday 11th March 2001.
Two days later, on the evening of Monday 2nd February 1998, I saw the film briefly mentioned on the BBC TV programme "Watchdog". It probably had been mentioned or featured on TV in-between that time, the remainder of 1998 and during 1999, but I didn't see it if it was.
My interest in Asperger's Syndrome had waned by April 1998. At the end of May 1998, I heard that Angela Browning, a then Conservative MP and a shadow cabinet member, stood down from her position and returned to the backbenches to look after her son who had been diagnosed with AS. I still took an interest, but in a disinterested fashion.
My stance eventually changed fourteen months later, in early August 1999, when I read a newspaper article on the condition, purely by chance. It was this article, which reawoke my interest in the condition because the character featured had so many traits like mine. I remember thinking "Hey, this character's just like you". This was the catalyst in my decision to seek a diagnosis.
Inspired by the article, I went to my Doctor's surgery with the intention of getting a diagnosis on Wednesday 22nd September 1999. As I approached the building I began to have second thoughts and called it off, having lost my nerve. This merely delayed the inevitable, and as October and November passed this condition increasingly dominated my thoughts. In those months, when I had the time I researched the condition intensely on the Internet, which was unavailable to myself in February 1987, February 1990, August 1994 and in April 1995.
During October, November and December 1999 I gradually came to the conclusion that I had to get a diagnosis. There was no turning back. In fact, there was no alternative. On the night of Sunday 9th January 2000, I succumbed to the inevitable. I was sat in the bath and thought to myself "Well, it's a new year, new millennium. You have got to get a diagnosis. You can't go on like this. Something has got to give".
The following day, having made the decision to get diagnosed, I emailed various support groups on the Internet, and of course, individuals with Asperger's themselves for help and advice with the diagnosis process.
I opted to see Professor Digby Tantam who was based at Sheffield. Lorna Wing was also on my list of choices but I had to discount her because of distance reasons. In January 2000 she was based at the Maudsley Hospital in Kent.
What would have happened had I not been diagnosed in 2000? I reckon I would have had a nervous breakdown because I was feeling the strain of everyday life, which can be very hostile to Aspies and Autistics, but particularly when you are undiagnosed. Trust me, if you went 20-odd years through life with this condition undiagnosed, you would eventually have felt the strain and effects of it somehow. Many people have cracked up and been sectioned who have the condition. I haven't somehow, or I at least haven't yet - but there's always time!
This photograph of me was taken on Friday 14th January 2000, five days after I had decided to get a diagnosis.
AS was also portrayed on Newsnight on the evening of Tuesday 27th June 2000, four weeks after my diagnosis but I missed that.
I made an appointment at my Doctor's Surgery on the evening of Monday 24th January 2000, four days after seeing the Holby City programme. I wanted to see a particular GP I had in mind. There are four on my panel, but my first choice GP wasn't available until Monday 31st January, so I decided to see another.
The appointment was made for two days later, which was the earliest date available, which was the morning of Thursday 27th January 2000. On that date I saw my second choice GP, who I asked, "Will you grant me a referral?". This GP, who I won't slag off. I have a lot of respect for her and I have seen her a lot of times over the years, didn't. I dwelled on this and the day after, I made another appointment for Tuesday 1st February. None of the other GP's on the panel was available that day so I saw the same one again, through necessity rather than choice.
After making my introductions I again asserted that I was 101% sure that I had this condition. The only thing I gained was a referral to the psychiatric unit of my local Hospital, as that would be best and I quote "Suited for my needs". I retorted that I wanted to see someone who was an expert on the subject, whereas the person I was to see at my local Hospital might not be. I didn't rant or rave. That isn't my style unless I am stressed or mentally overloaded. I quietly left the room.
I did get to see a good professional under my local Hospital. If it hadn't been for this GP I may never have got to see the Clinical Psychologist who I was to see on Thursday 11th May.
In the majority of cases, most given medical judgement is correct, but if you have any doubts about any opinion or judgement you have been given, follow your instincts. They are human beings and are prone to making the same mistakes just like you and I. If there is anyone who is correct 100% of the time and has never made a single mistake in their life, then I would like to meet them.
I made another appointment on Thursday 3rd February with a different GP, for eleven days later.
