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By Jo Gamm Witt
Four weeks ago today my precious little sheltie Mandy passed away unexpectedly after surgery. She had such a presence during the eight years we shared together. She wouldn’t let me sleep in; after all, dogs like to be on a schedule. So, she’d jump up on my bed (even though I don’t allow dogs on my bed) and would lick my face till I had to smile and just give her loving. Mornings were always her laying with her tummy up, hoping for some tummy rubs. And cuddle times on my lap, where I’d ask “Where’s my kiss?” and she’d give me licky kisses. Breakfast time also often meant Mandy and Sivana hyper playing with each other and with my kitty Cassidy, who likes dogs. Mandy knew my schedule well, and she was always the one to alert the other dogs when it was time to eat. Every morning I have prayer time at the table after breakfast, and Mandy knew what the final words of the prayer were, barking right after I said them, knowing it was time for their morning treat. My remaining dogs have been pretty lost since Mandy’s been gone, without her to alert them about when it’s time for various things. When I’d sit at my desk, Mandy would lay right next to my feet or even rest her head on my feet. When I’d come home, I’d always be greeted with Mandy’s happy, hyper barking and excitedly spinning in circles. And she never wanted outside for very long, so I’d listen for her barking that she was ready to come back in. In the evenings Mandy would lay right beside me on the floor or sometimes join me on the couch, if there wasn’t already a cat on the couch. And if I fell asleep on the couch, I could count on Mandy to jump up on the couch and lick my face when it was time for them to go out. The loss of her presence is deeply felt.
Life is changed forever when someone enters your life and also when they leave; their presence leaves an imprint. Death is a mystical phenomenon that in many ways makes no sense, even though intellectually it does, but emotionally it does not. We as humans like to think we can control things, but many things we cannot. And things we can’t control grieve us more greatly. Too many things in life we don’t understand. Maybe some day we will….
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